Culinary disaster:

[side_show]

I made a horrible and very stupid mistake on Monday night:

 I was cooking a large amount of tandoori chicken to freeze for lunches.  While waiting for it to cook, my man and I got rather intoxicated. The timer on the stove buzzed, and I decided to sample the food.  Because of my state, I somehow didn’t notice that the meat hadn’t completely cooked until I had eaten nearly the whole piece.  I hadn’t considered that because there was so much more chicken than the original recipe called for that more cooking time would be needed.  I put the roaster back in the oven and cooked it for enough time to actually cook the chicken right through, then let it cool, and put it in the fridge so that I could package it the next morning, and went to bed.  I then tried to sleep, but after a few hours I was feeling pretty sick, and ended up spending the whole night and most of Tuesday worshipping at the porcelain alter.  

Of course now I have lots of tasty tandoori in my fridge that I don’t think I’ll ever be able to eat any of.  I tried to get my guy to eat some last night, but because he’d seen how sick it made me, he accused me of using him as a guinea pig, and possibly trying to kill him. So I now have a face covered in broken capillaries from retching for hours and hours, and pounds of chicken no one wants to eat.

[jough]

It was more likely the alcohol that caused you to be sick, rather than the chicken.

Most chicken is fine to eat raw, provided you didn't let it sit out and get all diseasey.  It's the bacteria and worms and stuff that'll get you.  

Do you shop at a skeevy supermarket or something?

However, your boyfriend is probably right.  When in doubt, throw it out.

It's not worth getting sick over $4.99 worth of chicken.

[side_show]

No alcohol involved I'm afraid - to clairify I was intoxicated by playing a certain game of golf.  Hence the intense gobbling of chicken.  I have a weakened immune system to to some health concerns, so I'm pretty sure it was the raw meat.  (Also, chicken is crazy expensive in Canada due to the bird flue epidemic - I'm talkin' about $15 worth of chicken.  But I still ain't gonna eat it.)

The real issue is that I was stupid enought to eat raw meat without noticing!

[Bozack]

No alcohol involved I'm afraid - to clairify I was intoxicated by playing a certain game of golf.

.....
Is "a certain game of golf" a euphemism for humpin', or smokin' the green? Or are you just really really big on putt-putt?

[V-Adore]

No alcohol involved I'm afraid - to clairify I was intoxicated by playing a certain game of golf.

.....
Is "a certain game of golf" a euphemism for humpin', or smokin' the green? Or are you just really really big on putt-putt?

I believe side_show is referring to being "all split on green." Life was Awesome for her and the man, although I'm guessing the retching made it non-Awesome with great alacrity.

Anyway, it's a shame about the chicken; a good tandoori is a thing of beauty and a joy forever.

[side_show]

I believe side_show is referring to being "all split on green." Life was Awesome for her and the man, although I'm guessing the retching made it non-Awesome with great alacrity.

Anyway, it's a shame about the chicken; a good tandoori is a thing of beauty and a joy forever.

Right you are,V-Adore, "all split on the green" I was.  Aparently there's a reason they call it "dope." And extra points for the use of the word "alacrity" - did you sit in on the schooling Uncle Culpepper gave to Little Nephew?

[V-Adore]

Right you are,V-Adore, "all split on the green" I was.  Aparently there's a reason they call it "dope." And extra points for the use of the word "alacrity" - did you sit in on the schooling Uncle Culpepper gave to Little Nephew?

My parents and I pay significant amounts of money so I can attend the kind of school which licenses me to use "alacrity" in everyday conversation. (It's also a school which licenses me to sit around playing Dungeons & Dragons while constantly bitching about the amount of work I'm not doing, but that's slightly less publicized.)

Anyway, I'll take notes about interactions of the particular game of golf and cooking ("not a good idea").

[side_show]

This is the company my guy works for: http://www.weed-man.com/ It's had a rather direct effect on my life.  I'll keep my cooking on the strait and narrow.

[CortJstr]

No alcohol involved I'm afraid - to clairify I was intoxicated by playing a certain game of golf.

.....
Is "a certain game of golf" a euphemism for humpin', or smokin' the green? Or are you just really really big on putt-putt?

What is it, Make CortJstr Look Up Old Strips Day or something? Geeze o' flip.

http://www.achewood.com/index.php?date=06202003

[slink]

Too many good euphomisms.
I wonder if you hide an entire cola in one of those golf... stick... bag things.

[Choop]

This is the company my guy works for: http://www.weed-man.com/ It's had a rather direct effect on my life.  I'll keep my cooking on the strait and narrow.

Nice page title here: Weed Man - Locate Dealer

"Hello, thanks for calling Weed Man. How can we help you?"
"Uh.. I uh, need some help on my lawn, ya dig?"
"Well, we have a variety of non-intrusive services, as well as buriable time-release pesticide capsules. Have you called Weed Man before?"
"Lemme just ask, how much for, like, two ounces of that ...uh, 'pesticide'?"
&c.

[andalucia]

That is a sad story indeed.
Weed-Man shirts are quite the fashionable accessory for those members of the high-school marijuana set who feel the need to advertise their proclivities-- a fellow I dated in ninth grade bought one from a trendy store, having only played that particular game of golf twice, and I mocked him thoroughly.

This is why we stoned people tend to stick to the non-labour-intensive, unthinky foods like Crunchy Things.

[side_show]

Dear god, you folks have no idea how sick I still am.  Uggh!  I haven't kept down anything except Saltines in days.  Just trying to stay hydrated.

As for the Weed Man - you should see the skeptical looks he gets whenever anyone asks him where he works.  I love the website - they make the company look so nice and clean-cut.  Yet actually, as my guy explains "I have the kind of job they give to people who just got out of prison."

[V-Adore]

Dear god, you folks have no idea how sick I still am.  Uggh!  I haven't kept down anything except Saltines in days.  Just trying to stay hydrated.

Ick. At this point, have you considered actually getting medical help? I don't know much about food poisoning, and for all I know they'd pat you on the head and advise you not to eat bad chicken anymore, but that sounds like it's getting ridiculous.

EDIT: Just saw the Disease Dude thread. Good luck.

As for the Weed Man - you should see the skeptical looks he gets whenever anyone asks him where he works.  I love the website - they make the company look so nice and clean-cut.  Yet actually, as my guy explains "I have the kind of job they give to people who just got out of prison."

And, if you take it too literally, are pretty likely to go back...