When I lived in the dorms, zero pets were allowed. I thought it was pretty retarded.
I tried to get guinea pigs once. I built them a huuuuge open-top enclosure (8 feet by 4 feet) so they could run laps. I read and read about them on knowledgeable internet pig-centric sites and thought they were adorable. I read cute stories from happy 'pig owners who adored their little guys and bought them fresh veg all the time. I got a metric-shit-ton of Carefresh and alfalfa. I got cute little piggy-igloos for them to sleep in, water bottles, treats, food, chew toys, a book on 'pigs, the whole nine yards.
When I brought them home...
I just looked at their beady little eyes. They looked at me and scampered about. It became readily apparent that one of them bullied and bit the other one. I realized, "these things are raised like chickens in South America for food." and "I cannot love these animals." I hung my head in shame, then packed them back into their cat carrier and took them back to the store.
My little sister cut out a little infographic of
"Guinea Pig Returned For Store Credit" from The Onion and sent it to me recently.
*****EDIT: Would I feel this way about other animals, such as a pug dog? I see
Drew and
Natalie's pugs Charles and Chester, and they are so dang cute I can hardly stand it. The Onion has another amusing article about pugs
here. Drew and Natalie also have a bunch of
awesome pug videos on their YouTube space,
drewtoothpaste and
oldnataliedee.
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