The OFFICIAL Unofficial Achewood Message Board
Trivial Pursuits => Wild Card => Topic started by: side_show on May 31, 2004, 02:39:57 pm
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My bestfriend's getting married in a couple of months and I sent her this link to keep her sense of humour intact:
I have to warn you some of the later pictures envolve nudity, but the earlier ones just envolve mullets...
http://www.mulletsgalore.com/picturebooks/23_mulleted_matrimony/index.html
I just don't understand. I just don't understand.
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What the hell? A stripper wedding?
And that Flyers wedding... jeez, I love hockey, but no way.
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What the hell? A stripper wedding?
And that Flyers wedding... jeez, I love hockey, but no way.
Exactly my thoughts . . . the Flyers?
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I used to work with a woman who got married on a golf course.
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I went to a wedding this weekend where the Dixie Chicks' "White Trash Wedding" was on the soundtrack.
It was in fact true that she should not have been wearing white, and the groom couldn't afford no ring.
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It seems we have a conundrum. Which is worse: Flyers wedding or klingon wedding? What about a Ren Faire wedding?
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It seems we have a conundrum. Which is worse: Flyers wedding or klingon wedding? What about a Ren Faire wedding?
How can any of those be right?
My fiancee and I are strongly, strongly considering getting married here. (http://www.voodoodoughnut.com)
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What would an Achewood wedding look like? Say, Phillippe and Ultra Peanut finally tie the knot...
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What would an Achewood wedding look like? Say, Phillippe and Ultra Peanut finally tie the knot...
I was about to say that that would be two-timing and thus merit INCREDIBLE DEATH, but I guess he is a widower and all, isn't he?
The sad thing is that my SO has alluded several times to wanting a RenFaire sort of wedding. As time goes by, this has changed from a slightly amusing thought to a point of practical concern; I sort of hope that he'll depend on traditional subdivisions of wedding-prep duties so I can at least say my parents vetoed it.
(If my parents don't veto it, I'll have to flee into the night.)
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There could be worse things than a Ren Faire wedding.
For instance:
I'm thinking, I'm thinking!
Ok, how about a NASCAR wedding (or would that be a NASCAR hitchin'?)
An Olsen twins wedding.
Manilow nuptuals.
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Ok, how about a NASCAR wedding (or would that be a NASCAR hitchin'?)
I think the rasslin' wedding would be worse than that. All standing inside a ring, , all showing the bride on the NuptialTron cutting a promo on the groom's old girlfriends, all pyro and theme music as the bride walks down the aisle, somebody getting smacked in the head with a STEEEEEL chair.
And if you had it Mexico you'd need a 6-sided ring and everybody wearing masks.
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Ok, how about a NASCAR wedding (or would that be a NASCAR hitchin'?)
I read an Ann Landers column some years ago where some poor girl wrote, "My finacee is insisting that we have a NASCAR-themed wedding. He wants to wear a NASCAR driver's suit and have his groomsmen dressed as pit crew. I want a traditional wedding, but he won't hear it. What do you think?"
Sadly, Ann's answer was not "RUN, GIRL! fuck*ng RUN AWAY WHILE YOU STILL CAN!"
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I don't know, I find the sneering on that page a little too vitriolic, and a little on the classist side.
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I think the rasslin' wedding would be worse than that. All standing inside a ring, all showing the bride on the NuptialTron cutting a promo on the groom's old girlfriends, all pyro and theme music as the bride walks down the aisle, somebody getting smacked in the head with a STEEEEEL chair.
And if you had it Mexico you'd need a 6-sided ring and everybody wearing masks.
Someone. Quick. Marry me. This is the most awesome idea ever.
I would totally want to come out and climb up on the turnbuckle, resplendent in my feather-trimmed robe, name all embroidered across the back, and thrust the rings (which would have to weigh ten pounds each and have inset lacquered American flags) up into the air triumphantly. I want all the roles traditionally filled by children to be midgets, dressed in unitards with airbrushed-on tuxedo fronts. I want a Spanish Announce Buffet Table. Surely any woman would be proud and delighted to hear Her Man emit an ear-piercing WHOOOOOO instead of a wishy-washy "I do".
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I don't know, I find the sneering on that page a little too vitriolic, and a little on the classist side.
Anda likes mullets, Anda likes mullets!!!
Let's all point at her and laugh. I think it'll make us feel better about ourselves.
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I think the rasslin' wedding would be worse than that. All standing inside a ring, all showing the bride on the NuptialTron cutting a promo on the groom's old girlfriends, all pyro and theme music as the bride walks down the aisle, somebody getting smacked in the head with a STEEEEEL chair.
And if you had it Mexico you'd need a 6-sided ring and everybody wearing masks.
Someone. Quick. Marry me. This is the most awesome idea ever.
I would totally want to come out and climb up on the turnbuckle, resplendent in my feather-trimmed robe, name all embroidered across the back, and thrust the rings (which would have to weigh ten pounds each and have inset lacquered American flags) up into the air triumphantly. I want all the roles traditionally filled by children to be midgets, dressed in unitards with airbrushed-on tuxedo fronts. I want a Spanish Announce Buffet Table. Surely any woman would be proud and delighted to hear Her Man emit an ear-piercing WHOOOOOO instead of a wishy-washy "I do".
Now would that buffet be manned by the Spanish Announce Team or just Konnan? Would there be a "to be the man" speach?
You should go all out. Have Brother Love perform the ceremony. When they get to the "or forever hold your peace" part have a plant object just so you can cut him off by yelling, "it doesn't MATTER what you think!" then hit him with a Styles Clash, Ki Krusher, London Calling, or something. Even better, to signify your unity with you new bride have her help with a 3D.
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How about a Barney wedding?
I love you
You love me
We're a Hap-pee fam uh lee!
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I don't know, I find the sneering on that page a little too vitriolic, and a little on the classist side.
I do have to agree with you on some level. Once they got to the stripper-wedding stuff, it was vaguely funny, but the middle stretch read far too much as "let's mock vaguely unattractive people for daring to get married and take pictures while being vaguely unattractive!" for my taste.
At least one of my aunts' wedding pictures would fit on that page with no cognitive dissonance whatsoever.
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Now would that buffet be manned by the Spanish Announce Team or just Konnan? ... You should go all out. Have Brother Love perform the ceremony.
Ladies? Gentlemen? We have a Best Man.
Would there be a "to be the man" speech?
PUT IT IN THE BANK 'CAUSE IT'S AS GOOD AS GOLD, BABY
WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
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Because of this thread I've spent my commutes trying to decide what my entrance music would be. I haven't come up with a good one yet.
Sadly my WWE-style Tron video would mostly feature me posting on Achewood and The Random Game which is pretty boring. Instead I'd have to opt for the effects-laden video that has virtually nothing to do with me. Like AMW or Raven.
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I don't know, I find the sneering on that page a little too vitriolic, and a little on the classist side.
I do have to agree with you on some level. Once they got to the stripper-wedding stuff, it was vaguely funny, but the middle stretch read far too much as "let's mock vaguely unattractive people for daring to get married and take pictures while being vaguely unattractive!" for my taste.
At least one of my aunts' wedding pictures would fit on that page with no cognitive dissonance whatsoever.
Come on, the first picture of the "rockers" in all their teased and sprayed glory is awesome, mostly because you can tell they take themselves very, very seriously. Anyway I agree that some of the others are kinda mean, but hell, I couldn't just post up a bunch of stripper pictures without a lead in that didn't make me seem like a total perv.
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My sister's wedding pictures would probably fit too.
Let's face it, while people can't help being vaguely unattractive, it's totally their own fault if they voluntarily do things with their hair which are so likely to elicit derisive laughter.
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Agreed.
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I'm thinking I gotta get me invited to a wedding soon.
I could go with theirs (http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&category=1469&item=4169786253&rd=1).
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The pictures that are actually making fun of the mullets are reasonable, I suppose, as presumably one gets a mullet intentionally, but a few in the middle stretch seemed entirely focused on perceived dumpiness, which gave me pause.
I still want to know the context on the stripper wedding, though. WTF?
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The pictures that are actually making fun of the mullets are reasonable, I suppose, as presumably one gets a mullet intentionally...
I actually asked my hairstylist about this as she was giving me a mohawk (sorry - no pictures, I hated it - way too much work to have it stand up and stay up. I grew it out right away). She said that yes, sometimes people come in and actually ask for a mullet, and that other times they ask for it to be "short on top and long in the back" aka "the shorty-long back."
As someone who will shortly be a dumpy-maid of honour, I have to agree the dumpiness thing is a little unfair, but I can sure as hell guarantee I'll be laughing at my own picture! (or possibly crying!)
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I was telling my S.O. about this thread last night and when I mentioned that we mocked Ren Faire weddings she got a little mad at me. I'm starting to worry about her.
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Wow, you're totally going to have loot and zither players at your wedding!
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Do you mean "lute?"
Or do you actually mean he's going to give out loot, schwag, booty as wedding favors?
There must be a greater story somewhere behind the apparent stripper wedding, but I can't find it.
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You know what I liked about the stripper wedding? The guy with hisshirt off. I mean, what mental process led him to believe that was warranted?
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I mean, what mental process led him to believe that was warranted?
Alcohol.
And being one of those. That was my thought when I saw it. I've been to enough idiot's weddings to know that there's one of those at every reception.
But, well, what made any of it warranted is still really honestly beyond me.
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Yep, I meant lute - if you read my post "Culinary disaster:" you'll understand that I'm recovering from food poisoning, so I ain't all that with it.
Yeah, what's that guy doing with his shirt off? He ain't all that!
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I'm thinking I gotta get me invited to a wedding soon.
I could go with theirs (http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&category=1469&item=4169786253&rd=1).
Those people put WAY too much information in their ad. Recipe for disaster; I know who, I know where and I know when. All I need now is the info on both sets of parents and I got at least two houses to rob that will be empty for about 12 hours that day.
YEEE-HAW!
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Even better, to signify your unity with you new bride have her help with a 3D.
that would kick teh ass.
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No more gaming nonsense in the Lounge this time. Back to wedding wrongness!
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