The OFFICIAL Unofficial Achewood Message Board
Achewood => Achewood => Topic started by: Bozack on September 17, 2004, 05:13:57 am
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LADY BLUMPKINS?
EDIT: Because this comic was actually a PM update, with PM meaning "AM of tomorrow", I put down the date of the day it went up, not the day it is supposed to represent in the Achewood chronology. Still, it could be worse: we could all be reading PVP.
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i say this now because it is true:
this is a crappy strip.
blah blah i know it's free, shouldn't complain, etc., but i've never, ever, been so anti before. i think it's because ray is strangely out of character. it's fuck*ng with me.
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I'm really confused by Ray. Why is he playing the rational one?
This is funny in concept, but I sort of can't get into it. At all.
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I thought this one was hilarious.
That is all.
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Well, you'd better learn to like it, because it's all you're getting until the twenty-seventh.
I actually thought this was pretty good for a few reasons: Ray's trying to be all earnest and infomercial about this new brewmaster role and Beef won't stop with his half-serious mumbly-mouthed blue-skying. "Ottawa Modified Death" feels like a potential analogue or at least compliment for / to "due to punishment". And Beef didn't use that fuck*ng clumsy "such as" when he meant "like".
Who drinks a beer with clove aftertaste, though? Goths?
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I can't tell whether I just enjoyed it because it mentioned Ottawa, which is like an hour from where I grew up.
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Apparently Ray gets all serious and defensive when you mock his pretentiousness. Or when he cuts himself on the sour cream lid because it's the only thing in his fridge. Good to know.
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that cats who stand up on hind-legs and can talk are funny and make me laff.
i'd imagine (which i can, because i apparently share several "traits" with r. beef) that being friends with Roast Beef for as long as Ray Smuckles has, would at some points in time try one's patience (and, indeed, vice versa i'm sure).
"will you just taste the beer?", indeed Ray, indeed.
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After an hour's solemn reflection, I think I like this better than I did earlier. It's still a little incongruent (why isn't Ray raving about how precisely you "modified kill" a deer?), but there's at least a lot of funny concepts here.
also: "lady-blumpkins" in the alt text. What to say about that? I don't know.
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I think I've just changed my band name to Ottawa Modified Death.
That is all.
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also: "lady-blumpkins" in the alt text. What to say about that? I don't know.
Hmmm, the less the better I would imagine.
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"Ottawa Modified Death" feels like a potential analogue or at least compliment for / to "due to punishment".
Given Beef's previous discussions regarding the sport of killing men, (http://www.achewood.com/index.php?date=09132004) perhaps his schitzophrenia is getting the best of him.
And Beef didn't use that fuck*ng clumsy "such as" when he meant "like".
I am SO fuck*ng tired of that. I didn't really notice it until I saw it pointed out here. Now I can't stand it.
"Such as rheumetism" (http://www.achewood.com/index.php?date=07012004) my ass.
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Oh man, you think just READING it makes you irritated - I tried using it in polite CONVERSATION a couple of months ago and it made people visibly uncomfortable.
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The concepts are funny but the characters are out of character.
Onstad on another 11 day hiatus. I should be self-employed. He should be pricing all his merchandise by the Euro for all the time off he gives himself. Not that he isn't entitled to it. But unless he's in rehab or chemo, it's tough to respect.
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Dang! How does he afford to do this? This webcomic gig must be pretty lucrative.
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Also, I been watching the blogs and for the past week or so they haven't been updated either. It's been like two months since we've heard from Pat (that asshole).
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Also, I been watching the blogs and for the past week or so they haven't been updated either. It's been like two months since we've heard from Pat (that asshole).
Yeah, the blogosphere lately has been a little boring. Maybe I just got too used to things like the Krazy-Pool incident, but things just aren't living up to my expectations. Maybe it'll get better once he gets less busy?
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Also, I been watching the blogs and for the past week or so they haven't been updated either. It's been like two months since we've heard from Pat (that asshole).
Yeah, the blogosphere lately has been a little boring. Maybe I just got too used to things like the Krazy-Pool incident, but things just aren't living up to my expectations. Maybe it'll get better once he gets less busy?
I've been waiting for the death of the blogs for a while now - it's not like Onstad to really keep up with a project of that kind of scope.
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Aww, man, it always gets all quiet on here when there isn't a new comic. Dag.
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For a while I just that that blogspot was acting up again and not reporting that they'd updated to my RSS reader. So I checked them all manually and realized no, they're really just not new.
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Doesn't Onstad's wife have a pretty good job, enough to mostly support them both so that they don't starve between eBay auctions?
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Doesn't Onstad's wife have a pretty good job, enough to mostly support them both so that they don't starve between eBay auctions?
So I presume, yes. I don't recall precisely, but I seem to recall mention of her working, so one presumes they aren't dependent on the webcomic-related income. (This does not prevent him from shilling as if income from his comic was the only thing standing between his family of eight and death in the snow -- but that appears to be de rigeur for any webcomic artist who can get away with it, and in Onstad it at least isn't as odious as some people.)
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I'm sure we've had this conversation about one thousand times (CortJstr, dim the house lights, if you please), but I think the dude is entitled to a break. Yeah, I'll bitch right along with the rest of you when a strip just sort of sadly piffles to the ground, like an unloved balloon forgotten after an inaugural PTA meeting, but how much of your Beloved Pop Culture has so thoroughly infected your speaking vocabulary? I am a white guy with a degree in fuck*ng Library Science and, thanks to this fuck*ng comic, I will occasionally and unintentionally use the word "dogg" like it was a fuck*ng comma.
I'd rather a sugar-momma / sell-out swag (1) funded hiatus than a slow decline into mediocrity (I'M LATE TO MY JOB SAFETY-TESTING SOUR CREAM, DEANSTER!!eleven)
(1) Anyone else caught themselves wondering who the fuck is buying all those books (e.g. "Swamped with shipping books. PM update tomorrow, maybe")?
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I'm sure we've had this conversation about one thousand times (CortJstr, dim the house lights, if you please), but I think the dude is entitled to a break. Yeah, I'll bitch right along with the rest of you when a strip just sort of sadly piffles to the ground, like an unloved balloon forgotten after an inaugural PTA meeting, but how much of your Beloved Pop Culture has so thoroughly infected your speaking vocabulary? I am a white guy with a degree in fuck*ng Library Science and, thanks to this fuck*ng comic, I will occasionally and unintentionally use the word "dogg" like it was a fuck*ng comma.
I'd rather a sugar-momma / sell-out swag (1) funded hiatus than a slow decline into mediocrity (I'M LATE TO MY JOB SAFETY-TESTING SOUR CREAM, DEANSTER!!eleven)
(1) Anyone else caught themselves wondering who the fuck is buying all those books (e.g. "Swamped with shipping books. PM update tomorrow, maybe")?
Zartan, you speak the truth. Far be it from me to begrudge Onstad his breaks; with luck, he'll be able to get the book deal settled and return to strip and blogs with greater energy. As for swag-shilling, I totally don't mind; the webcomic artists who really frustrate me in this regard are the ones who combine desperate demand for payment with the slow decline into mediocrity (Hal Holbrook occurs immediately and also adds the extra level of odious that is "cartoonist with two legitimate syndicated strips begging for handouts with all the fierce intensity of a kid about to be evicted from college and starve to death on the street.")
I, too, wonder who the hell is buying all these books. (I've been tempted to pick up Volume 3, but this is ridiculous!)
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Far be it from me to begrudge Onstad his breaks;
If you won't do it, I will.
I haven't had a full week's vacation in three years -- much less several multiple week vacations in the same year. I'm not whining or gloating, but Damn! Onstad could be a little more conscientious when it comes to production consistency.
I'm not suggesting he has an easy job or that it's less stressful than other people's work. I'd be willing to trade for a month or so and see how the other half lives, but that's beside the point. It just that if O wants to be a professional cartoonist he's not acting very professionally. He doesn't treat his audience with much respect.
If he's willing to cut us off for two weeks or so, why not use that time to create a backlog of strips. Then the eccentricities of the artisitic process are irrelevant. Then he doesn't have to look like a drunk or a lazy fuck by saying "I can't post a strip until 5pm today". Yet he can still be as artistically erratic as he wants on a daily basis. It was a system good enough for Sparky Schultz, Al Capp and Gary Larson. It's not about creative timing, it's only about publication timing. After three years a two week delay wouldn't hurt anything.
Come on, Chris. Be a man. Step up. The mark of a true professional cartoonist is publication on a regular daily basis. Cut the crap and give us what we want. Every day. Bil fuck*ng Keane can do it.
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Bil fuck*ng Keane can do it.
Oh man. That is a low blow.
I don't know. Maybe, say, Calvin and Hobbes would still be around, if it was OK for a cartoonist to take a week off now and again. Doonesbury does it, and many people think that one is as good as it ever was. Would we really want Achewood every single day if it meant it was more like Family Circus? (And isn't that a fascinating concept to contemplate?)
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Wasn't Calvin and Hobbes in reruns for 6 months one time because Waterson took a sabbatical? Comics in the Post like Foxtrot routinely go into reruns for a week at a time.
I don't know how many unique hits Achewood gets but it does seem to be pretty popular. And "last chance for personalized books" is probably enough incentive to get fence-sitters to finally pull out their Mastercards en masse.
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Would we really want Achewood every single day if it meant it was more like Family Circus? (And isn't that a fascinating concept to contemplate?)
Not to derail the discussion, but... This, (http://www.achewood.com/index.php?date=01102003) maybe?
Anyway... I suppose I'm ambivalent. Right now I can grasp why Onstad is taking time off, and since it is comic-related, I can basically allow him slack here. (This assumes he is actually taking the time off to finish the Checkerboard book and not just, you know, drink.) It would be nice if he could be a consistently-producing cartoonist, but if that can't happen, that can't happen. I continue to hope it will, though.
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I was in a mood last night, but I still stand by most of what I said.
Nobody said he couldn't take a vacation. Acting like a professional and creating a backlog of strips before you publish them would allow him to take a break without interrupting his publishing schedule. And there's a big difference between taking a couple of weeks a year off, or even a six month sabbatical every decade and the erratic way Onstad publishes.
Lord knows it is paramount that the quality of the strip be preserved. I wouldn't want Onstad to do anything that would threaten the quality of the strip. I just can't see how this could possibly do that.
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Nobody said he couldn't take a vacation. Acting like a professional and creating a backlog of strips before you publish them would allow him to take a break without interrupting his publishing schedule.
Just to play devil's advocate a bit -- it is entirely possible that the things that have kept him from production (the new book deal, signing and shipping a massive backlog of book orders) have been sudden enough to prevent his being able to draw a backlog of strips. It seems like it all came on very suddenly, so maybe he just didn't have time.
Note that in general I agree with you, though; a backlog is professional, and it's the best way to balance these things. Hopefully in future he'll have the time to do this.
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I'm mostly with August; I read a lot of comics and I don's see most of them taking off more than once in a year, and in those instances, the good ones still give you content you haven's seen before. Scary Go Round was still pretty good even when Allison did his American Tour.
He wouldn't be shipping books 8 hours a day without content. The content should be more important than the products based on the content, right? It seems to me that even he should concentrate on content because anyone can ship books for him but only he can write and draw the strip.
It's capitalism at work though, so if he sloughs off and the strip turns to shit or he decides to run reruns for a year while he backpacks in Nepal, then it dies of natural causes. I'm sure he understands the consequences of offending his fanbase.
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His request on the last day of a new strip to "check the blogs" hasn't proven very fruitful, either - the last time any of them were updated was September 14th, and many haven't been updated since several days before that.
I'm pretty wishy-washy on the whole thing - lord only knows I've left the readers of my website hanging for periods of time a lot longer than a week. But on the other hand, I don't spend a lot of time asking them to buy things from me. If he's comfortable with bringing the whole machine to a halt for weeks at a time, then that's his call. But I'm sure at some point he'll see the diminshing fanbase that's a result of that. People who are into the strip enough to seek out a place to discuss it with others will probably always be around. But the casual readers will move on.
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This does not prevent him from shilling as if income from his comic was the only thing standing between his family of eight and death in the snow
I swear I really cannot recall Onstad ever doing anything of the kind.
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Are you kidding? Have you never noticed the huge
BUY BUY BUY MY CHEAP CRAP, CONSUMERS!?
No?
Anyway, there's nothing wrong with being a whore - Onstad just seems to be especially self-flagellating about it.
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Nobody said he couldn't take a vacation. Acting like a professional and creating a backlog of strips before you publish them would allow him to take a break without interrupting his publishing schedule. And there's a big difference between taking a couple of weeks a year off, or even a six month sabbatical every decade and the erratic way Onstad publishes.
Ah, but that's just the thing. I don't have a big backlog of frozen strips - I create each one every new day when I am inspired. I don't like having content in a stable, I can't work that way. I put it up fresh as soon as it's done. I get a lot of grief for working the way I do, but there is no alternative. I am sorry you can not count on seeing a new one every day, but I am just the one man. I don't pretend to be Universal Press Syndicate, foisting dead ink. Consider Achewood a 'zine. Pretend you have leather ##### on, and there is a lady nearby, and she likes Suicidal Tendencies. You are going to have such great sex tonight.
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Okay, who's posing as Onstad?
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Nobody said he couldn't take a vacation. Acting like a professional and creating a backlog of strips before you publish them would allow him to take a break without interrupting his publishing schedule. And there's a big difference between taking a couple of weeks a year off, or even a six month sabbatical every decade and the erratic way Onstad publishes.
Ah, but that's just the thing. I don't have a big backlog of frozen strips - I create each one every new day when I am inspired. I don't like having content in a stable, I can't work that way. I put it up fresh as soon as it's done. I get a lot of grief for working the way I do, but there is no alternative. I am sorry you can not count on seeing a new one every day, but I am just the one man. I don't pretend to be Universal Press Syndicate, foisting dead ink. Consider Achewood a 'zine. Pretend you have leather ****** on, and there is a lady nearby, and she likes Suicidal Tendencies. You are going to have such great sex tonight.
Ok "Chris". Whatever.
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Okay, who's posing as Onstad?
Some idiot from Virginia who was probably inspired by that fake Tarantino blog. I don't know whether to just delete his account and posts and pretend that this never happened, or just wait and see if he'll try to come up with proof or something.
I say if he loves this message board so much, post a link to it on Achewood.com. That would convince me.
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So OK I'm not 100% clear on the cuntiness here. I know there was some blowout at Dumbrella which was before my time -- but was it something terrible enough to account for this weirdly severe irritation that comes out when Achewood goes on vacation or runs a rerun or puts up something sub-par or late in the day or asks for money?
I've never known fans to have such disgust for the creator of something they're fans of, especially when that something is given away for free. The reactions seem way overboard and I'm wondering if there's a devastating or maybe heartbreaking backstory that would explain it. Oh I hope so that would rule!
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Well, my remarks above were directed at a hypothetical idiot whom I imagined was posting as Onstad without actually being Onstad.
I've never viewed it as disgust as much as chagrin, as when your dopey kid brother rolls his SUV again. I mean, you love the kid, but sometimes his behaviour just sets you at wit's end.
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I have an aunt named Agnes, but she is not as clear-thinking and levelheaded as you, Agnes. Indeed, what gives with the hating?
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Er, irritation at the fact that you comport yourself like a professional cartoonist, expect to be treated like that, and then have diva fits where you just don't produce? Forgive me if I think it's perfectly justifiable.
Also, do you ever plan to do anything on the board besides randomly harrass your detractors? (It's not particularly useful and often tends to increase the detraction.)
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Diva fit?
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Also, do you ever plan to do anything on the board besides randomly harrass your detractors? (It's not particularly useful and often tends to increase the detraction.)
After having just caught up on that freshly-locked thread (the interesting shit always seems to go down when I'm not checking out this board fifteen fuck*ng times an hour or whatever), I submit that it is particularly useful in being hilarious.
That, and you could probably feel the thud of the "does he or doesn't he lurk" case slamming shut clear on the moon.
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Also, do you ever plan to do anything on the board besides randomly harrass your detractors? (It's not particularly useful and often tends to increase the detraction.)
After having just caught up on that freshly-locked thread (the interesting shit always seems to go down when I'm not checking out this board fifteen fuck*ng times an hour or whatever), I submit that it is particularly useful in being hilarious.
That, and you could probably feel the thud of the "does he or doesn't he lurk" case slamming shut clear on the moon.
The really funny thing about that is that, this morning, I read the updated version of yesterday's strip, blinked at the sudden inclusion of the Hogan album, and thought "huh; that's either a really creepy coincidence or Onstad's been lurking." I show up at the board, and, well, wind knocked out of my sails...
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Then he doesn't have to look like a drunk or a lazy fuck
Cut the crap and give us what we want. Every day.
Er, irritation at the fact that you comport yourself like a professional cartoonist, expect to be treated like that, and then have diva fits where you just don't produce? Forgive me if I think it's perfectly justifiable.
Unbelievable. Someone self-publishes a comic for FREE, a comic you all are fans of and read for FREE, and you presumptuous little shits have the motherfuck*ng gall to call him a lazy fuck and actually come out and DEMAND he provide you with the FREE ENTERTAINMENT that you have come to expect? And you expect him to treat you with civility? Fuck you, you worthless, spoiled babies.
And don't say that buying merchandise from him entitles you to anything. You gave him money and got what you paid for: merchandise. That doesn't make you a stockholder in Achewood Industries.
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Hey, welcome to the boards, Kapow.
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Is today Asshole New Member Day on the forums?
Did I miss a memo?
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Hey, welcome to the boards, Kapow.
guten tag
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Free speech is not just a right, it's a fight. Come on, let's not block dudes based on the color of their avatar.
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Is today Asshole New Member Day on the forums?
Did I miss a memo?
Close! Top secret anonymous sources have recovered a memo indicating that today is "weak-ass non-replies to new members" day on the forums.
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guten tag
Ich war sarkastisch.
Is today Asshole New Member Day on the forums?
Did I miss a memo?
Clearly you did, if Onstad's ninety-seven posts and these two new charmers are any indication. I'm glad linnea's not here to see this.
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I suppose this message board is wonderfully delightful! To be in it is merely a bore. But to be out of it simply a tragedy.
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Ich war sarkastisch.
Im Ernst!
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Merch thread has been duly split.
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V, you're still my internet crush. THX 4 B-N THAR 4 ME ;)
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<3
That is my heart! 4 U LOL
... okay, enough of that. Back to the deconstructionism.
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No, we weren't personally ejected as people - in fact, I continue to read and post on occasion at Dumbrella. We were ejected from the place we had to discuss Achewood.
I no longer wished to be associated with Dumbrella or to be running a board. I was getting lumped in with crap like Diesel Sweeties just because that strip's author was hosting my forum. Also, his stupid fans were putting diarrhea on all my surfaces. It was a necessary break in order to maintain integrity. I knew there'd be another place set up fairly immediately.
Apparel: it's not an exact science, from manufacture to washroom detergents. If your nipples are making openings in the fabric when they usually don't, please contact our customer service address. We use Hanes and American Apparel, huge manufacturers, so if something's goofy it's a genuine anomaly and not because we have our shirts made by a rastafarian man.
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In The Punisher movie the t-shirt made by the voodoo-daddy was BLOWN UP and washed out to sea for a few months and it was still perfectly intact.
I do understand the difference between REAL LIFE and the movies, but that's quality, baby.
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I say if he loves this message board so much, post a link to it on Achewood.com. That would convince me.
Jesus no
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I no longer wished to be associated with Dumbrella or to be running a board. I was getting lumped in with crap like Diesel Sweeties just because that strip's author was hosting my forum. Also, his stupid fans were putting diarrhea on all my surfaces.
Just because you think it is subpar doesn't mean that it is. I still read Diesel Sweeties almost daily because I enjoy its characters and sense of humor. What about Wigu? Is that "crap" though its storyline is experimental and many of its characters are -dare I say it- more real than most of yours?
It was a necessary break in order to maintain integrity. I knew there'd be another place set up fairly immediately.
This is not the image any of us had of your decision to close the board. You had an issue with immediate criticism of your work, and didn't appreciate fans holding you up to the higher standard that you displayed your capability of. You locked the board (after twice completely emptying it of posts) because you didn't want to deal with it any more. Don't try to revise history, Chris. It's impossible.
Also, I'm not as pissed about the shirt as you seem to think I am. I hope my payment for it helped you to continue on the path toward financial and professional independence.
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There were a lot of great reasons to close that old board. It was riddled with lice. You all had a new place to discuss before it was finally closed, so I don't see any harm.
I like Jeff, I read Wigu. He's got a great voice.
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I complained a bit when Onstad closed the old board, but only because of the short notice. Some artists like interacting with their fan base and customers, some don't, and others seem to need a little distance.
If Chris continues to post here, even irregularly, I think it would be the best of both worlds for him AND us (fans of his work). He doesn't have to worry about the day-to-day moderating of the board, so if he's irked by complaints about a strip he can just STOP READING rather than feel the compulsion to do so in case something needed to be moderated, etc.
And of course we get the benefit of input from Mr. Achewood. I can't see how this isn't a win-win situation as long as people behave themselves at least as well as they would were they talking to someone face-to-face.
The board was strong without Onstad's presence and it will continue to be a strong community.
Welcome to our community, Chris.
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I agree with Jough. Having spent a year running this board, I became more sensitive Onstad's stated reasons for having closed the old one. I don't entirely agree with the way in which it was done, but I don't fault him for doing it.
That said, can we be done with this now? My head hurts.
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I, too, love Deisel Sweeties. It's like candy. I could send a DS to a friend who'd never heard of it, and they'd be able to get it.
Achewood is an acquired taste. It's like the Twin Peaks of web comics, only harder to explain.
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I read DS daily and it has its moments but on the whole I don't really find it as funny. Sometimes it's just like "look at all the indie! Whoo!"
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Achewood is an acquired taste. It's like the Twin Peaks of web comics, only harder to explain.
I think you're damning Achewood with faint praise. I agree it's an acquired taste, but about 1000 times better than Twin Peaks.
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Diesel Sweeties is crappy.
Getting back on subject, I loved the Ottawa Modified Death strip. So much that I suggest a t-shirt be made with the company's logo.
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Achewood is an acquired taste. It's like the Twin Peaks of web comics, only harder to explain.
I think you're damning Achewood with faint praise. I agree it's an acquired taste, but about 1000 times better than Twin Peaks.
....Okay, so, how's this. It's like Twin Peaks, but the midget dances, instead of merely creeping the fuck out of me.
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....Okay, so, how's this. It's like Twin Peaks, but the midget dances, instead of merely creeping the fuck out of me.
Well, the midget did dance in Twin Peaks, but he still creeped the fuck out of me while doing so.
I got suckered into watching Carnivale just because Michael J. Anderson was in it.
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This is not the image any of us had of your decision to close the board. You had an issue with immediate criticism of your work, and didn't appreciate fans holding you up to the higher standard that you displayed your capability of. You locked the board (after twice completely emptying it of posts) because you didn't want to deal with it any more. Don't try to revise history, Chris. It's impossible.
No no no no NO, holy god.
Don't you people remember?
The old board was closed because it became infested with idiots. Don't you guys remember how badly the old board started to suck, right around the time it was euthanized? And then this place started up pretty much idiot-free? That was what it was, chochachos. I would surmise that if Onstad was feeling overly sensitive about criticism to his work, he'd just stop doing it.
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Since we've all been getting along civilly for the past day or so, I'm going to declare this issue dead. Let's get back to what this board is really about -- Ancient Sumerians, blumpkins and catching each others' minor grammar errors.