The OFFICIAL Unofficial Achewood Message Board
Achewood => Achewood => Topic started by: filas on October 21, 2004, 07:13:48 am
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the head trip would send me spinning so fast. well articulated by beef.
can you really get advice from playboy fast enough to solve a problem you're having? doesn't it take them like three weeks to run the contracts by a guest author for the advice column such as steve martin?
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she was pure like snowflakes
no one could ever stain
the memory of my angel
could never cause me pain
soft and something sweaters
too magical to touch
to see her in that negligee
was really much too much
na na na na na na na na na na na na na
it is sad for me that i can just do that.
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Dude the date!! you forgot the date!!
I am sure Jough will be kind enough to fix this...
The list issues going through Beef's head at this time must include:
Why does Molly read Playboy
Everyone is going to read this and know it is about me
Molly really hates Gramm K
What does my trailer smell like?
this is apart from the usual issues floating around in his head.
Anyone think of any others?
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It's "those soft, fuzzy sweaters". I have had that damned song running through my head for approximately, oh, seven months now and every time I come close to getting it replaced with something else someone will make mention of or reference to it and the vicious cycle starts anew.
You have no idea how often people make casual reference to the J. Geils Band until something like this happens.
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Discontinued high end phonograph needles are the new Grey Goose vodka.
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"Well no wonder last Saturday was such a big disappointment."
Beef goes from never kissing a lady to like full on menage action in in like 5.2 seconds. Amazing. I love how he's so perfectly matter of fact about it, too.
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You have no idea how often people make casual reference to the J. Geils Band until something like this happens.
The thought utterly terrifies.
Anyway, I'm curious to see how Beef reacts -- hopefully with a greater knowledge of what's in Molly's head, so for once in a long time we can actually see some communication. Remarkable, huh?
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Anyway, I'm curious to see how Beef reacts -- hopefully with a greater knowledge of what's in Molly's head, so for once in a long time we can actually see some communication. Remarkable, huh?
But would that be funny?
The passing reference to last Saturday made this one for me.
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Anyway, I'm curious to see how Beef reacts -- hopefully with a greater knowledge of what's in Molly's head, so for once in a long time we can actually see some communication. Remarkable, huh?
But would that be funny?
It has the potential to be funny, at least -- I doubt that, even if they actually talk, Beef and Molly are going to be able to get to much of a conclusion. Also, I will confess to being sort of tired of the whole "they have problems because neither of them ever goddamn talks to the other" trope, which appears to have been played out about as much as it can be.
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In the column on the right, one of the words is or begins "appol." I can't think of any word in the English language that is or begins "appol" except "appollonian." So either that was a mistake on Chris' part, a typo in Playboy, or - and I prefer this option - a Funny Thing.
Oh, and this buildup with Molly and Beef is making me nervous.
[ Franz. ]
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I'm not quite sure what the hell "...see through her teeth to the pulp inside..." means
The stuff in your teeth that the enamel is encasing - the stuff that gets exposed when you have a cavity - is called the pulp, if I remember my elementary school health class from ten million thousand years ago. Or is it fifteen.
Apparently Gramma K's enamel has become transparent.
[ Franz. ]
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It could be referring to St. Appolonia.
I too thought of both the J. Geils Band and the offhand remark to a "game of three" and am wondering now if there's a blog entry to back this strip up (I haven't had time to read them this week).
Does she walk? Does she talk?
Does she come complete?
My homeroom home run angel
has pulled me from my feet.
She was pure like snowflakes;
No one could ever stain.
The memory of my angel
would never cause me pain.
The years go by
I'm looking through a girly magazine.
There's my home run angel
on the pages in between.
My blood runs cold!
My memory has just been sold!
My angel is the centerfold...
My... angel... is the centerfold...
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"Well no wonder last Saturday was such a big disappointment."
Beef goes from never kissing a lady to like full on menage action in in like 5.2 seconds. Amazing. I love how he's so perfectly matter of fact about it, too.
I took this as his making a sarcastic little jab at the sort of people who arrange and participate in threesomes. He's just pretty sexually squeamish in general. He didn't want to have sex in the poolhouse at that one party (I believe it was hot sauce themed), remember?
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I took this as his making a sarcastic little jab at the sort of people who arrange and participate in threesomes.
Yeah, I didn't really think that sounded like he was serious either.
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I took a look at Tommy Lee's new book, the one which is partly narrated by his c*ck. He advises us guys to forget about threesomes and just move right on to foursomes. That way, no one's waiting around for their turn at bat, so to speak ( oddly appropriate in Mr. Lee's case ).
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I wonder what Molly's referring to with the word "nonstarter." Is it the idea of getting out of the trailer, or is it BEEF?
You never see Molly's nasty side when she's with Beef, but you sure do see it on the blog and in her letter here. I know girls gotta release their steam sometimes, but maybe her 'real' self is too harsh for Beef to handle (or to handle Beef?).
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I took this as his making a sarcastic little jab at the sort of people who arrange and participate in threesomes.
Yeah, I didn't really think that sounded like he was serious either.
Either that or Molly called the Three-way and there were two DUDES. That could be kind of disappointing, especially if you get schooled in the pleasuring of your lady.
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You never see Molly's nasty side when she's with Beef, but you sure do see it on the blog and in her letter here. I know girls gotta release their steam sometimes, but maybe her 'real' self is too harsh for Beef to handle (or to handle Beef?).
Well, I think it's natural to be frustrated in relationships like this. I'm convinced that Molly really does care for Beef, but who wouldn't be frustrated by a guy like that? (Or a girl like that, depending. I really don't think it's very gender-sensitive, just relationship-type-sensitive.) Frustration happens, and it's probably better that she take it out there than in front of him.
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Every relationship worth working at is frustrating at times.
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Thanks, guys. Thanks for removing "Ace of Spades" from my head and replacing it with fuck*ng "Angel in the Centerfold." AWESOME.
As my gift to you:
JITTERBUG
JITTERBUG
YOU PUT THE BOOM BOOM INTO MY HEARRRRT,
YOU SEND MY SOUL SKY HIGH WHEN THE LOVIN' STARRTS,
UH-JITTERBUG INTO MY BRAAAYNNNE,
BUT SOMETHING'S BUGGIN' ME,
SOMETHIN' AIN'T RIGHT
MY BEST FRIEND TOLD ME WHAT YOU DID LAST NIGHT
LEFT ME SLEEPIN!
IN MY BED!
I WAS DREAMING!
WHEN I SHOULDA BEEN WITH YOU IN-STEA-AYEDDD!
WAKE ME UP, BEFORE YOU GO-GO,
DON'T LEAVE ME HANGING ON LIKE A YO-YO!
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Thanks, guys. Thanks for removing "Ace of Spades" from my head and replacing it with fuck*ng "Angel in the Centerfold." AWESOME.
As my gift to you:
JITTERBUG
JITTERBUG
YOU PUT THE BOOM BOOM INTO MY HEARRRRT,
YOU SEND MY SOUL SKY HIGH WHEN THE LOVIN' STARRTS,
UH-JITTERBUG INTO MY BRAAAYNNNE,
BUT SOMETHING'S BUGGIN' ME,
SOMETHIN' AIN'T RIGHT
MY BEST FRIEND TOLD ME WHAT YOU DID LAST NIGHT
LEFT ME SLEEPIN!
IN MY BED!
I WAS DREAMING!
WHEN I SHOULDA BEEN WITH YOU IN-STEA-AYEDDD!
WAKE ME UP, BEFORE YOU GO-GO,
DON'T LEAVE ME HANGING ON LIKE A YO-YO!
The wheels on the bus go round and round
round and round
round and round
The wheels on the bus go round and round
All though the town.
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Thanks, guys. Thanks for removing "Ace of Spades" from my head and replacing it with fuck*ng "Angel in the Centerfold." AWESOME.
As my gift to you:
JITTERBUG
JITTERBUG
YOU PUT THE BOOM BOOM INTO MY HEARRRRT,
YOU SEND MY SOUL SKY HIGH WHEN THE LOVIN' STARRTS,
UH-JITTERBUG INTO MY BRAAAYNNNE,
BUT SOMETHING'S BUGGIN' ME,
SOMETHIN' AIN'T RIGHT
MY BEST FRIEND TOLD ME WHAT YOU DID LAST NIGHT
LEFT ME SLEEPIN!
IN MY BED!
I WAS DREAMING!
WHEN I SHOULDA BEEN WITH YOU IN-STEA-AYEDDD!
WAKE ME UP, BEFORE YOU GO-GO,
DON'T LEAVE ME HANGING ON LIKE A YO-YO!
The wheels on the bus go round and round
round and round
round and round
The wheels on the bus go round and round
All though the town.
you are my sunshine,
my only sunshine.
you make me happy,
when skies are grey.
i hope you know dear,
how much i love you.
please don't take
my sunshine away.
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You push the grey skies outta my way.
You make the sun shine brighter than Doris Day!
Turn a bright spark into a flame.
My beats-per-minute never been the same.
That is one of the finest damn songs of the past 20 years.
Fuck you people who make fun of Wham! Fuck you all! You can not make fun of a band with an exclamation mark in their name. It is impossible.
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I'm on a Mexican radio.
I'm on a Mexican ( whaa-o ) radio.
Radio. Radio. Radio. Radio.
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on a related and silly note, I got my five-year old daughter stuck singing
No you're not hardcore!
Til you live hardcore!
And the legend of the rent
Was WAY HARDCOOOOOORE!
from School of Rock.
I fund it funny. The wife wanted to kill me with a cork puller.
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There were Swedes to the left of him, Russians to the right
A Finn at the blue line lookin' for a fight
Brains over brawn -- well, that might work for you
But what's a Canadian farmboy to do?
HIT SOMEBODY!
What else can a farmboy from Canada do?
HIT SOMEBODY!
(Been in my head all day. Sadness.)
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also, the wham! song 'credit card baby' may be the finest saccharine pop single of all time.
you can have my credit card baby
but keep your red hot fingers off-a my heart, lady
all you want is all you see
but what can i do when you say that you're in love with me?
that's right. fuck you, freezepop.
even though your singer is damn hot in that todd shirt.
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The odd cut-off text on the right of the last panel is copied and pasted from one of those "Nigerian Banking Scam" spams.
Sorry, I'm not going to waltz down memory lane with you all by putting 80s lyrics here. Jesus, people.
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Sorry, I'm not going to waltz down memory lane with you all by putting 80s lyrics here. Jesus, people.
Who said it necessarily had to be '80's lyrics? Now I'm just looking for an excuse to deploy "Copacabana."*
* "Copacabana" might actually be '80's, but I don't know and don't care.
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Sorry, I'm not going to waltz down memory lane with you all by putting 80s lyrics here. Jesus, people.
soon i discovered that this rock thing was true
jerry lee lewis was the devil
and jesus was an architect previous to his career as a prophet
all of the sudden i found myself in love with the world
so there was only one thing left for me to do
was ding-a-ding-dang my dang-a-long-ling-long
jesus built my car
it's a love affair
namely, jesus, and my hot rod.
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Sorry, I'm not going to waltz down memory lane with you all by putting 80s lyrics here. Jesus, people.
Who said it necessarily had to be '80's lyrics? Now I'm just looking for an excuse to deploy "Copacabana."*
* "Copacabana" might actually be '80's, but I don't know and don't care.
Her name was Lola
She was a showgirl
With yellow feathers in her hair and a dress cut down to there
She would merengue
And do the cha-cha
And while she tried to be a star, Tony always tended bar
Across the crowded floor
They worked from eight till four
They were young and they had each other
Who could ask for more?
At the Copa
Copacabana
The hottest spot north of Havana
At the Copa
Copacabana
Music and passion were always the fashion
At the Copa
They fell in love
His name was Rico
He wore a diamond
He was escorted to his chair and saw Lola dancing there
And when she finished
He called her over
But Rico went a bit too far and Tony sailed across the bar
And then the punches flew
And chairs were smashed in two
There was blood and a single gunshot
But just who shot who
At the Copa
Copacabana
The hottest spot north of Havana
At the Copa
Copacabana
Music and passion were always the fashion
At the Copa
She lost her love
Her name was Lola
She was a showgirl
But that was thirty years ago when there used to be a show
Now it's a disco
But not for Lola
Still in the dress she used to wear, painted feathers in her hair
She sits there so refined
And drinks herself half blind
She lost her youth, she lost her Tony
Now she's lost her mind
At the Copa
Copacabana
The hottest spot north of Havana
At the Copa
Copacabana
Music and passion were always the fashion
At the Copa
Don't fall in love
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You are a magnificent bastard, Mr. Isosceles. Point yielded.
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Sorry, I'm not going to waltz down memory lane with you all by putting 80s lyrics here. Jesus, people.
soon i discovered that this rock thing was true
jerry lee lewis was the devil
and jesus was an architect previous to his career as a prophet
all of the sudden i found myself in love with the world
so there was only one thing left for me to do
was ding-a-ding-dang my dang-a-long-ling-long
jesus built my car
it's a love affair
namely, jesus, and my hot rod.
Yeah, fuck it.
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We had joy
We had fun
We had Seasons in the Sun
But the hills that we climbed
Were just Seasons out of Time
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I'm 'enery the 8th I am
'enery the 8th I am I am
I got married to the widdow next door
She's been married seven times before
And every man was an 'enery ('enery!)
She never had a Willy or a Sam (No Sam!)
I'm 'er 8th old man called 'enery
I'm 'enery the 8th I am.
(Second verse, same as the first)
I'm 'enery the 8th I am
'enery the 8th I am I am
I got married to the widdow next door
She's been married seven times before
And every man was an 'enery ('enery!)
She never had a Willy or a Sam (No Sam!)
I'm 'er 8th old man called 'enery
I'm 'enery the 8th I am.
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I'm 'enery the 8th I am
'enery the 8th I am I am
I got married to the widdow next door
She's been married seven times before
And every man was an 'enery ('enery!)
She never had a Willy or a Sam (No Sam!)
I'm 'er 8th old man called 'enery
I'm 'enery the 8th I am.
(Second verse, same as the first)
I'm 'enery the 8th I am
'enery the 8th I am I am
I got married to the widdow next door
She's been married seven times before
And every man was an 'enery ('enery!)
She never had a Willy or a Sam (No Sam!)
I'm 'er 8th old man called 'enery
I'm 'enery the 8th I am.
Sadly my mom sang that to me the other day just when I mentioned someone in a book I was reading named Leo XII. ahah. I chanted "no! No! no! not that!" while covering my ears :D
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Gypsies, Tramps and Theives
We heard it from the people of the town
They called us
Gypsies, Tramps and Theives...
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Bang bang!
He shot me down... bang bang!
I hit the ground... bang bang! My baby shot me dooown....
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S! A! T-U-R! D-A-Y! NIGHT!
S! A! T-U-R! D-A-Y! NIGHT!
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Her name was Lola
well I’m not the world’s most masculine man
but I know what I am and I’m glad I’m a man
and so is lola
lo-lo-lo-lo lola lo-lo-lo-lo lola
lola lo-lo-lo-lo lola lo-lo-lo-lo lola
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Jesus people. Is it karaoke night at the message board?
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I know. This is embarrassing. I feel like I'm in the common room of my freshman dorm at 11pm.
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I feel like I'm in the common room of my freshman dorm at 11pm.
And you're the one standing in the corner with your arms crossed, amazed at how above all this you are while everyone else is busy enjoying themselves.
In a big country
Dreams stay with you
Like a lover's voice across the mountainside
Stay alive
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And you're the one standing in the corner with your arms crossed, amazed at how above all this you are while everyone else is busy enjoying themselves.
I think the door to the commons is unlocked and the janitor and his wife will be busy in those scarecrow costumes for a while so come on we can totally go steal an overhead projector, you said you wanted one for drawing our comics
Or at least maybe squeeze that note you wrote into her locker
NO ONE'S LOOKING!
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I know. This is embarrassing. I feel like I'm in the common room of my freshman dorm at 11pm.
all that comes to mind when i think of my freshman dorm is the following phrase:
niiiiiiiiiice jewish girls.
but, you know.
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Wow. Just...wow.
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Jesus people. Is it karaoke night at the message board?
It doesn't jump the shark until someone starts quoting Nitzer Ebb or Wesley Willis.
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One step, twoooooooo steps
Getting closer
Getting closer
Let them believe me
Let them wonder if I lie
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One step, twoooooooo steps
Getting closer
Getting closer
Let them believe me
Let them wonder if I lie
Rock over London
Rock on Chicago
Achewood: Here comes a special boy
the thread is now ready to be locked
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One step, twoooooooo steps
Getting closer
Getting closer
Let them believe me
Let them wonder if I lie
Rock over London
Rock on Chicago
Achewood: Here comes a special boy
the thread is now ready to be locked
Done and done.
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Commendably ended. It's like a microcosmic message board, all wrapped up on itself like a mystery inside an enigma inside a song lyric. Mad props!