The OFFICIAL Unofficial Achewood Message Board
Trivial Pursuits => Wild Card => Topic started by: Choop on November 17, 2004, 02:47:31 pm
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So the local multi-state lotto is up to $149 million, which means that in under a week it'll get split among some 30-person office pool; I didn't win it last night at $126 mil. Here were the plans of what to do with the $65 mil after-tax lump sum, in order:
- Pay off all the back debt
- Pay off and donate the car to the Salvation Army, buy a new convertible and something else
- Pay off the landlord's mortgage on this and his houses
- Pay off the parents' mortgage
- Give $1 mil each to the parents, my brother, and the wife's two best friends
- Invest $7 mil into blue chips and $3 mil into aggressive stocks
- Travel all of Europe for a couple months w/ language tutors
- Renovate an old mansion to include a huge modern kitchen, a library/office lined w/ shelves & a wetbar, a theater, and a pub
- Invest in our favorite local restaurants as silent partners
- Hire a personal/business/research assistant
- Donate $5 mil to our favorite charities: Habitat for Humanities, Planned Parenthood, Doctors Without Borders, Susan G. Komen BCF, and whichever Head Start program turns out to be the best after some research.
- Pay off our favorite sites' bills (including this one) for a year
- Support a Green Party candidate in a realistic election for local office
What would you do with big-ass lottery winnings?
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Bribe someone to give me a job, actually. OK, a job that didn't start until after I'd taken a trip to Japan for a few weeks.
Then when I wasn't so crazy bored anymore I'm sure I'd think of some other stuff.
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Buy a townhouse or condo someplace in Arlington.
Buy me & the SO cars that handle better in the snow
Hire a financial planner
From there on I guess it depends.
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Buy a Skyline R-33 GTR.
Buy a full on Pro Tools studio setup, and use my 002 with a laptop only.
Buy a bunch more music and games and DVDs.
Buy a bigass house in the country.
Buy my friend a bigass house in the country and lots of stuff.
Then give my parents loads too.
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Two chicks at the same time!
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Buy a bunch of video equipment and make a movie with my pals from the student TV station in college.
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1. Figure out how much ~6+ years of university are going to cost, put that aside.
2. Record shopping.
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$65,000,000 worth of DVDs.
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Ash, I don't know if you're serious or not, but I see huge market potential there: ex-girlfriends, bosses, joke gifts for friends, etc. A nicely wrapped gift turd would sell greatly.
I wonder if it's legal to mail shit...
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Legal AND profitable! (http://www.dogdoo.com/Default.asp)
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I figured it was too good for me to be original on. Nice link.
ALSO: This little dream of a venture is coming from a guy who mailed a traffic killed stray cat to the university president. I kept 'Fritz' in the freezer for a week, then boxed and labeled him up and sent him via the campus post office. The included note read "The new vendor's campus meal plan closely resembles the unfortunate contents of this box".
Dang. Told you I was hard core!
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I would start that revenge-for-hire business I've always wanted.
I would buy a big-ass house on Lanikai Beach and rent it to celebrities with more money than common sense. Then I'd charge non-celebrities to smell the sheets and seat cushions.
I'd rent a bunch of houses on the beach all at once and fly 100 friends and family in for a huge weeklong party. I'd pay Hank Jr and Kid Rock to host the party and do a couple of short sets. 25 male and female models will be mingling with the crowd. A trapeze. Monkeys juggling chainsaws. Tony Orlando and Dawn impersonators. Snoop Dogg and a Girls Gone Wild crew. Hookers dressed as nuns.
This will be a seriously degrading experience and I hope you all come.
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Beach house in Malibu. House for Mom in California. Recording studio. Seasonal rentals in places like Cape Cod, Aspen and Manhattan. 529s for Audrey and any other kids in the whole family, or for friends. Investments. Traveling. Charitable contributions to organizations like People For the American Way. AMG Mercedes. Find a midnight-blue 1979 Camaro Berlinetta and take it to West Coast Customs for pimping.
Stuff like that.
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Legal AND profitable! (http://www.dogdoo.com/Default.asp)
Well, not technically....
No, real dog poop will NOT make it past postal inspectors these days. Sigh. What's a person to do? DogDoo.com has come up with the perfect solution for you! Make your feelings perfectly clear with a custom, hand-made dog poop that looks and feels so REAL that no one can tell otherwise. Don't believe us? Order one to yourself today and be amazed. Each poop is lovingly hand crafted into the most perfect one-of-a-kind masterpiece that you will ever have the honor of purchasing. Legal? Yes. Disgusting? Yes. What sort of strange people would sell such a thing? The same sort of people that would buy such a thing. Indulge yourself. Fulfill your desire to send only the best in practical jokes.
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Order one to yourself today and be amazed.
Erm... Nah, I'm OK thanks. I'll take your word for it.
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What amazed me was that for a mere $268.00 at that site, you can get a plaque with some Bronzed fake dog poop on it.
Bronzed dog poop.
Truly this is an amazing country.
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I'd rent a bunch of houses on the beach all at once and fly 100 friends and family in for a huge weeklong party. I'd pay Hank Jr and Kid Rock to host the party and do a couple of short sets. 25 male and female models will be mingling with the crowd. A trapeze. Monkeys juggling chainsaws.
I'm so there.
Snoop Dogg and a Girls Gone Wild crew. Hookers dressed as nuns.
I'll bring the wife! Totally there! Shores of Hawai(')i? SO FUCKIN THERE MAN
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i've had so many scenarios in my mind play themselves out over the years, the only single linking factor between them was weeping.
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weeping
What? Because of a problem?
Man, lotto winnin's ain't no problem! How many times I gotta tell people this!
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1. Take entire family on a kickass vacation, pay off debts of all family and close friends, buy neat presents for whomever we want.
2. Buy a big 'ol plot of land out in boonies about 30-45 minutes from a pleasant metropolitan area. Plot must have a potable water supply, a creek would be nice, some caves would be a plus.
3. Build a big 'ol geodesic dome house (http://aidomes.com/). House will be off-grid. Anyone else in family who cares to build a house on the homestead is welcome, as long as we can't see their house from ours.
4. Have babies 'till I can't anymore.
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My fantasies are considerably less Heinlein and more cheesesteak. I probably shouldn't fantasize when I'm hungry.
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I would probably continue living as I do now, yeah, except with more freedom to buy books and eat out. I don't really feel the need to have an extravagant lifestyle; living comfortably and knowing that one is free from any monetary want is really quite enough.
That said, I would buy enough pinball machines to own my own miniature arcade. Maybe also a foosball table if I go really crazy.
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2. Buy a big 'ol plot of land out in boonies about 30-45 minutes from a pleasant metropolitan area. Plot must have a potable water supply, a creek would be nice, some caves would be a plus.
2a. Watch as metro area rapidly expands and in 10 years "the boonies" are now home to countless yuppies and families of 6 kids under 9.
2b. Sell plot of land for several hundred thousand more than it was bought for.
2c. Move another 45 minutes away, repeat.
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I think I'd buy my depressed best friend a muscle car and take a cross-country trip with him. Then I'd have wacky theme parties every Friday night. And eat really strange meats.
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I think I'd buy my depressed best friend a muscle car and take a cross-country trip with him. Then I'd have wacky theme parties every Friday night. And eat really strange meats.
Can't argue with that, yo.
Actually, I probably would help my folks out financially, if only so they'd be certain of being able to travel near-constantly once they retire. (I was sort of the reason their initial wanderlust stopped, so I should pay them back, really.)
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For the party I mentioned earlier, Ted Nugent is in charge of the grill.
Also, I would endow a scholarship at my HS and build a house on the big Island, maybe around Volcano or down toward Punaluu.
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I think I'd buy my depressed best friend a muscle car and take a cross-country trip with him. Then I'd have wacky theme parties every Friday night. And eat really strange meats.
That was a plan of mine before I even found Achewood. Perhaps why I feel such an affinity (or want to) with Ray. My affinity however always seems to fall to Beef.
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Oh, I forgot: a beach house in Paia on Maui. Just a little one.
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2. Buy a big 'ol plot of land out in boonies about 30-45 minutes from a pleasant metropolitan area. Plot must have a potable water supply, a creek would be nice, some caves would be a plus.
2a. Watch as metro area rapidly expands and in 10 years "the boonies" are now home to countless yuppies and families of 6 kids under 9.
2b. Sell plot of land for several hundred thousand more than it was bought for.
2c. Move another 45 minutes away, repeat.
Touché.
2d. Move to the moon.
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I think I would move. And instead of going to concerts, I would ask bands to play for me on a regular basis and invite friends to see them as well. A lot of bands I like would be willing to play for a reasonable stipend, I think. I don't have a lot of favorite sites; many I go to are paid for by giant corporate monoliths. This one, though, I'd subsidize. I would buy many of Chris' future paintings, if there be such items.