The OFFICIAL Unofficial Achewood Message Board
Achewood => Achewood => Topic started by: V-Adore on May 02, 2005, 05:16:50 pm
-
By popular demand: post about the blogs of early May in this here thread.
-
By popular demand: post about the blogs of early May in this here thread.
The thread title is beautiful chiasmus (http://deuceofclubs.com/ishitmy#####/analysis.htm).
-
As I was saying, I like to get the vegan scramble with Tofeggy™, harissa, and brown nut bean paste. Tofeggy isn't something you can screw around with, and I guess you might say I was putting the new chef (just a cook, really) to the test.
I cannot begin to describe the failure of his vegan scramble. First of all, he used egg whites, which he burned into a thin brown "pancake" before wiping on a pathetic amount of harissa and a spoonful of brown nut bean paste. Then he folded it into an offensive, greasy burrito. On the side was the appropriate scoop of fenugreek-steeped quinoa, which I was able to eat, but on the whole I was just disgusted with the affair.
Grossest breakfast ever?
Brown nut bean paste? What the fuck!
Also, Lyle's! Perfect!
-
See now I always used my cookie cutters as biscuit cutters. Turns out I had it all wrong and backwards!
-
I get extra enjoyment from reading Lyle's blog because of the banner advertising. I bet the Blogspot Ad Bot has hell of difficulty figuring out what ads to place above "tranny fux" entries.
LN's ads, last I checked, were for Snoop Dogg stuff. It's a value-added kind of funny.
-
See? Vapes are HIP, man. They are AWESOME.
-
I thought they were for booze.
SLF?
-
Stiff Little Fingers.
You gotta sus, sus, sus, sus, sus sus sus suspect device.
-
I think the observations in Stad's personal blog hit dead-on for alot of working, desperate people. It does remind me that married men seem to have alot of scorn towards post-prime lady hitons (albeit stad's narrative faces the tension with whimsy). Is the root of this spouse's love, or some weirdopathic "you had your chance" complex?
Also maritime-ready hull sounds like something Lowtax would write, but its still funny. And the erotisqueals rule.
edit: sorry about all the hyphens.
-
I think the observations in Stad's personal blog hit dead-on for alot of working, desperate people. It does remind me that married men seem to have alot of scorn towards post-prime lady hitons (albeit stad's narrative faces the tension with whimsy). Is the root of this spouse's love, or some weirdopathic "you had your chance" complex?
Also maritime-ready hull sounds like something Lowtax would write, but its still funny. And the erotisqueals rule.
See, I read Chris' blog and had two (2) thoughts:
1. Looks like he forgot to turn off the "Mr Bear" voice, and
2. Get over yourself, Chief.
-
this is the funniest thing lil nephew has ever posted.
in the end, they marry.
i'm still laughing.
-
Unlike Mr. Onstad, I am pretty much still an "unvalidated, snot-nosed wreck all the time."
But I do have a funny dog-feces story, which I believe I shall share right about now.
I was participating in an advertising photo shoot taking place at a fairly upscale house. Part of the shoot was done in the front yard, and I had just come back in and parked myself on a stool at the breakfast bar. One of my coworkers started frantically darting through the house asking everyone to lift their shoes so she could look at them. She got to me and I lifted my right shoe, which she could see was clean. As she scampered off to the next person, I lifted my left shoe to check it for myself. Completely poo-encrusted. I had unknowingly tracked dog dookie throughout the house. Um, oops. I then nonchalantly wandered back into the yard to scrape off the offending shoe, and never did admit that I was the excrement culprit.
-
Hip Lad Kitchen With Téodor Orezscu
I want to hug Mr Bear so hard
-
I keep finding dog poop in the front yard, which pisses me off because we don't own a dog. We do have a two-year-old, and I look forward to the day we're playing in the yard and she ambles over with a handful of dog turds. I sometimes see a guy walking three dogs down the street in the morning, and I think he might be responsible. Hopefully I can catch them in the act, run out and grab up the poop in a plastic bag, and run after him down the street shouting "YOU FORGOT SOMETHING!"
-
I keep finding dog poop in the front yard, which pisses me off because we don't own a dog. We do have a two-year-old, and I look forward to the day we're playing in the yard and she ambles over with a handful of dog turds. I sometimes see a guy walking three dogs down the street in the morning, and I think he might be responsible. Hopefully I can catch them in the act, run out and grab up the poop in a plastic bag, and run after him down the street shouting "YOU FORGOT SOMETHING!"
Maybe place mothballs along the interface between the street and yr lawn?
-
It would be awesome of lil nephew was a guest star on Cellar Notes (that short wine segment on NPR, hopefully it's not local so other people know what I'm talking about).
I want to hear him talk with Hugh and Al about fruits being sexually assaulted by other fruits in suburban ghettoslang so bad.
-
Roast Beef is actually a pretty good poet.
OH SHIIIIIIT
-
I really do enjoy Beef's poetry. It reminds me of William Carlos Williams, although perhaps this is not a surprise. Also, "OH SHIIIIIT" is exactly the way a poem about a Mexican restaurant run by ninjas should end.
-
They have churros at Taco Bell?
-
What's a churro?
-
What's a churro?
it's some type of food related, um, thing:
http://www.churros.com/churros.htm
-
ALSO SEE:
CHURRO (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Churro)
It gave me a bit of a chuckle to find out that Wikipedia has an entry for "Churro." It would not surprise me to see this food product on the menu of SaniTaco and frequently endulged upon by the R. Beef & Raymo Smookles.
-
In addition, I also forgot to say that churros are hell of quite tasty to eat. They are delicious to the taste.
:cry:
-
Churros are one of the reasons I wish I lived in California. They can't possibly be any good at Taco Bell, can they?
-
I'd just like to add that I think it is both remarkable and rad that someone has decided to join our ranks today, and make two very informative posts, apparently in order to educate us about churros.
If ever there was a good cause for membership, it is churro education.
Thank you, bdeth dot com.
acoxcae
edit: Why are we talking about churros, anyway? I just assumed that Roast Beef mentioned them in his "Ode to a Taqueria" - but I checked, and he didn't. Where did the churros come from?
-
ALSO SEE:
CHURRO (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Churro)
It gave me a bit of a chuckle to find out that Wikipedia has an entry for "Churro." It would not surprise me to see this food product on the menu of SaniTaco and frequently endulged upon by the R. Beef & Raymo Smookles.
Ooooohhhh. California Tortilla has those. But that would require actually going into a California Tortilla. And that would make baby Jesus cry.
-
If ever there was a good cause for membership, it is churro education.
And after all, we're all about education.
-
edit: Why are we talking about churros, anyway? I just assumed that Roast Beef mentioned them in his "Ode to a Taqueria" - but I checked, and he didn't. Where did the churros come from?
Ray got a job!
And also I now have a strange longing to have a caulk gun filled with sour cream. And I don't even like sour cream.
-
It's all coming together now...Ray working at Taco Bell....Beef writing about the Mexican Restaurant of Death. I understand now.
Onstad has eaten at Taco Bell, and did not enjoy the experience. This is merely my opinion. (Perhaps Pat should write them a note with his dry-erase marker, maybe directly on the foodservice counter.)
And does Taco Bell still have churros? The one near me switched to cinnamon twists (similar concept, but more like sugary pork rinds) sometime between the last time I was there and the time before that (a year-long window).
acoxcae
-
Fun Fact:
Taco Bell's "Cinnamon Crispas" are actually pasta-- that's right, deep-fried pasta. Rotini, to be precise, are deep-fat fried for approximately 25 seconds, then shaken in a bag of sugar and cinnamon while still hot.
I am not ashamed to admit that I worked at Taco Bell one summer.
-
Mrs. West managed Taco Bells for about 5 years.
-
i have eaten at a Taco Bell.
Thus, the circle of life is complete.
-
Taco Bell's "Cinnamon Crispas" are actually pasta-- that's right, deep-fried pasta. Rotini, to be precise, are deep-fat fried for approximately 25 seconds, then shaken in a bag of sugar and cinnamon while still hot.
This makes me want to weep.
-
I had fun with the taco bell manager one evening. The sign said taco's at a reduced rate after a specified time. I can't recall the rate or the time now, but you understand the concept I am trying to convey. The time was only minutes away and I was hoping for a little leverage. I understand now that tney aren't at discression to arbitrarily charge whatever they like that the computer automatically changes the register to ring up the correct price at the specified time. There was no one behind me in the line so I decided to wait. Apparently this wasn't a good idea as the manager resorted to threatening me with calling the police to move from her [still empty] drive through lane. I figured it probably wasn't a good idea to continue sitting there and I left. But damn I wanted some of those cheap tacos.
Curse you Taco Bell.
~Paul
-
FUCK
YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!
-
Meh.
-
Correct me if I'm wrong, but didn't The Establishment deal burritios at one time?
Also, correct me if I'm again wrong, but:
The burritos cake one's mouth
with refried-bean-paste.
If said product is not doused
with soda-pop post-haste.
I do not apologize for hyphenating three (4) times (above).
-
Goddammit, I want to read some of Molly's poetry! Enough of this tacos y burritos nonsense. Give me some water-sports-bronco-gramma-k-cam-ho maximum verbosity.
-
:backs away:
-
Emergent C, I would ask if you were off your fuck*ng medication, but that would suggest that you had, at one point, been on medication, which is clearly a ridiculous concept.
Because, I mean, Jesus, lady.
-
Aw, come now, ladies and gents. I was simply expressing a sincere desire to read about the exploits of the cat named Molly in verse form. Is that really so wrong?
(Nevertheless, I shall cease and desist, or I fear I may be chased away from this assemblage -- a fate I have seen befall others. At least Ah'm not tahlkin' lahk this.)
-
Well, now I feel like an asshole.
Still, though, I cannot fathom your deeply felt and explosive desire to read poetry by Molly. Can you not get to Myspace? Are your proxies screwed up?
-
Now really, look at the list of topics from which she can choose. Who wouldn't want to read poetry about that stuff? Roast Beef alone is worth a chapbook.
-
Now really, look at the list of topics from which she can choose. Who wouldn't want to read poetry about that stuff? Roast Beef alone is worth a chapbook.
I'm sure it would be some riff on how he has such low self-esteem even though he's undeserving of it, for example:
"Hickory Dickory Dock
Roast Beef Has a huge Cock
He's hung like a hoss
But to balance of course
To praise him would come as a shock."
-
Now really, look at the list of topics from which she can choose. Who wouldn't want to read poetry about that stuff? Roast Beef alone is worth a chapbook.
I'm sure it would be some riff on how he has such low self-esteem even though he's undeserving of it, for example:
"Hickory Dickory Dock
Roast Beef Has a huge Cock
He's hung like a hoss
But to balance of course
To praise him would come as a shock."
Just thought I'd warn you that this is bordering on fanfic. About Roast Beef's cock.
-
Now really, look at the list of topics from which she can choose. Who wouldn't want to read poetry about that stuff? Roast Beef alone is worth a chapbook.
I'm sure it would be some riff on how he has such low self-esteem even though he's undeserving of it, for example:
"Hickory Dickory Dock
Roast Beef Has a huge Cock
He's hung like a hoss
But to balance of course
To praise him would come as a shock."
Just thought I'd warn you that this is bordering on fanfic. About Roast Beef's cock.
Not to mention that giant condom he had!!!
-
Just thought I'd warn you that this is bordering on fanfic. About Roast Beef's cock.
There's non-cock fanfic? Huh. The Internet never ceases to amaze.
-
Now really, look at the list of topics from which she can choose. Who wouldn't want to read poetry about that stuff? Roast Beef alone is worth a chapbook.
You know who should also write poetry? Pat.
-
Not to mention that giant condom he had!!!
Molly had the condom. Wasn't it from a past boyfriend or something? Beef seemed pretty terrified by it, so that means he probably does not have a huge cock.
Shit. Now you've got me doing it too.
-
A QUESTION OF COCKS
~ a musical revue ~
Starring the TOUAMB Players,
Late of Their Performing Tour
-----------------of-----------------
Polynesia ~and~ Australasia.
Bobby Isosceles.
Ro[size=0] [/size]bot Roll Call.
CortJstr.
Emergent C.
and Scubbie Often as "Briggs".
LADIES AND CHILDREN NOT ADMITTED.
-
Fuck winning the internet.
Zartan wins the world.
-
Molly had the condom. Wasn't it from a past boyfriend or something? Beef seemed pretty terrified by it, so that means he probably does not have a huge cock.
Shit. Now you've got me doing it too.
You can't resist the call. The call of the Hall of Heads.
-
Molly had the condom. Wasn't it from a past boyfriend or something? Beef seemed pretty terrified by it, so that means he probably does not have a huge cock.
Shit. Now you've got me doing it too.
You can't resist the call. The call of the Hall of Heads.
T CORTJSTR DOES THIS MEAN WE ARE GOING TO RENAME ACHEWOOD ACHECITY
T ISOSCELES NO IT JUST MEANS COCKS IN YOUR FACE HUAGLAGLAGLAGLAG
-
T CORTJSTR DOES THIS MEAN WE ARE GOING TO RENAME ACHEWOOD ACHECITY
T ISOSCELES NO IT JUST MEANS COCKS IN YOUR FACE HUAGLAGLAGLAGLAG
That might be the worst Leisuretown impersonation I've ever seen.
-
T CORTJSTR DOES THIS MEAN WE ARE GOING TO RENAME ACHEWOOD ACHECITY
T ISOSCELES NO IT JUST MEANS COCKS IN YOUR FACE HUAGLAGLAGLAGLAG
That might be the worst Leisuretown impersonation I've ever seen.
Which is okay because it was a Jerkcity impression.
-
T CORTJSTR DOES THIS MEAN WE ARE GOING TO RENAME ACHEWOOD ACHECITY
T ISOSCELES NO IT JUST MEANS COCKS IN YOUR FACE HUAGLAGLAGLAGLAG
That might be the worst Leisuretown impersonation I've ever seen.
Which is okay because it was a Jerkcity impression.
What is this world coming to?
-
What is Cornelius, high? Who cooks in a tie? "Look at me! I'm wearing an entirely pointless and obscenely over priced dangly napkin around my neck while leaning over boiling liquids and molten fat! Whee!"
Although I do agree that starting a cooking show with a lingerie pillow-fight is a bit weird.
-
What is Cornelius, high? Who cooks in a tie?
Dandy fops, that's who. Dandy fops with madd coooking skillz, yo.
At any rate, a suit and tie is better than Teodor's lame Jaime Oliver ripoff ensemble. And I for one would like to see a Return To Civility on this nation's cooking programs. More three peice suits on the line! More cravats, jauntily knotted and impishly askew, adorning the grunting Ecudorians who are manning the deep fryer. Codpeices on the pastry chefs!
Although I do agree that starting a cooking show with a lingerie pillow-fight is a bit weird.
And by "weird" you obviously mean "Oh so very, very right."
-
Although I do agree that starting a cooking show with a lingerie pillow-fight is a bit weird.
And by "weird" you obviously mean "Oh so very, very right."
Don't ge me wrong, I'm not anti-lingerie pillow-fights I just think they don't belong with cookie. Kind of that when Showtime had Full Frontal Comedy where between each comedian where random shots of naked women dancing. It just didn't quite flow.
-
UNTIL DISEASES AND A HYENA ATE IT ALL UP.
-
Kind of that when Showtime had Full Frontal Comedy where between each comedian where random shots of naked women dancing.
Much as a bottle of Johannesburg Riesling and magazines from my childhood such as Bananas and Thrasher, that actually sounds awesome!
-
"Make yourself at home amid the apocalyptic coterie," indeed. I <3 Beef.
-
a "Suicide" is when you can mix a lot of types of soda together, like Coke and Sunkist and Mountain Dew and Lemon Barrel Lemonade and root beer and Hawaiian Punch and Cherry Coke and 7up and Grape Fanta (or also Grape Sunkist) and Pepsi Tab Dr. Pepper Sierra Mist Squirt Sprite Diet SpriteHansensC2RCgingeralefresca [BUFFER FULL SESSION IS NOW READ-ONLY]
Wait... did Philippe just BREAK Blogger?
-
a "Suicide" is when you can mix a lot of types of soda together, like Coke and Sunkist and Mountain Dew and Lemon Barrel Lemonade and root beer and Hawaiian Punch and Cherry Coke and 7up and Grape Fanta (or also Grape Sunkist) and Pepsi Tab Dr. Pepper Sierra Mist Squirt Sprite Diet SpriteHansensC2RCgingeralefresca [BUFFER FULL SESSION IS NOW READ-ONLY]
Wait... did Philippe just BREAK Blogger?
I think that was the implication. Also, I really like how as he's typing out the names of the sodas he get progresively more and more jacked up. Poor kid is so sensitive to the sweet stuff (see: cereal episode).
-
I remember suicides. Just be careful with the orange and the root beer because they'll overpower everything else.
-
At least he isn't at the bored-college-kid phase where he is mixing suicides for color. ("Hey, check this out! Green!")
-
At least he isn't at the bored-college-kid phase where he is mixing suicides for color. ("Hey, check this out! Green!")
Strike a little close to home, V?
-
At least he isn't at the bored-college-kid phase where he is mixing suicides for color. ("Hey, check this out! Green!")
Strike a little close to home, V?
You say this like I haven't pretty much admitted to doing this, or at least watching it. The number of shades of totally unappetizing green you can get out of one dining-hall drink machine is truly staggering, believe you me.
-
At least he isn't at the bored-college-kid phase where he is mixing suicides for color. ("Hey, check this out! Green!")
Strike a little close to home, V?
You say this like I haven't pretty much admitted to doing this, or at least watching it. The number of shades of totally unappetizing green you can get out of one dining-hall drink machine is truly staggering, believe you me.
You forget the ubiquitous dining-hall breakfast of MELLO YELLO OVER LUCKY CHARMS.
-
I thought it was something else over Wheaties....
-
You forget the ubiquitous dining-hall breakfast of MELLO YELLO OVER LUCKY CHARMS.
quite rightly
-
You forget the ubiquitous dining-hall breakfast of MELLO YELLO OVER LUCKY CHARMS.
quite rightly
Did you know that guy (Donovan) is still alive? He plays county fairs now.
-
You forget the ubiquitous dining-hall breakfast of MELLO YELLO OVER LUCKY CHARMS.
quite rightly
That's what I love about dining halls; their collection of antiquated soda/pop brands.
-
Fuck Fuck Shadoobie.
-
You forget the ubiquitous dining-hall breakfast of MELLO YELLO OVER LUCKY CHARMS.
quite rightly
That's what I love about dining halls; their collection of antiquated soda/pop brands.
Bet they don't have Kickapoo Joy Juice.
Or Ale 8-1