The OFFICIAL Unofficial Achewood Message Board
Trivial Pursuits => Wild Card => Topic started by: linnea on August 01, 2005, 09:08:13 pm
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Hey everybody!
Jesus. So one of the guys that I work with was arrested for stalking his ex girlfriend, who also works with us. Right before he got arrested, he was pulling some seriously inappropriate shit with me (showing up and pounding on my door at 1AM on three separate occasions, following me, calling me incessantly). In addition to that, I found out that he had used his work computer to hack into my personal and work email. Hello, more criminal charges!
ANYWAY, I never had any sort of relationship with this guy other than work, being cordial, and going on a couple of hikes with him. I felt really creeped out when he was showing up at my house, but the guy is pretty socially retarded, and he was so pathetic and seemed so harmless that I just felt sorry for him. After he broke into his ex's house, stole stuff, wrote things on her car, etc. I no longer feel that he is harmless. ESPECIALLY now that I know he was reading my private email and whatnot, I don't feel that he is harmless. He also has guns, such as a 12-gauge shotgun. I have told the police all of this. They are doing a pretty good job so far.
And so on... the DA is bringing more criminal charges in addition to the FELONY STALKING and domestic violence charges he is facing already. I haven't had to be questioned by his lawyers yet, but the other victim in this case says that they are ruthless. The stalker probably flipped through the phonebook and picked out the attorney that had the scariest-looking drawing of a bear in their Yellow Pages advert.
I am already feeling queasy at the thought of questioning. Has anybody else been harassed by sleazeball lawyers? What the hell do you do? I have done nothing except tell the truth. Any advice for holding up under heavy fire would be greatly appreciated.
P.S. After I heard that he was accessing my personal information I decided to hide my blog. pm or email if you want the password.
P.P.S. This is so fuck*ng unfair. I was just trying to be nice to the guy. I am a good person, god damn it. I am a volunteer EMT, and I have done more than my fair share of helping people. I'm also training to be a firefighter currently. Putting on 50 lbs of firefighter bunker gear and crawling through a house trying to find a victim doesn't scare me, but getting stalked sure as hell does. I really hope that this guy doesn't get to come back to the island. I am really scared that he might try to hurt me or my kitties.
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Aug, fly out to Elbonia and help this girl out.
Is he likely to spend a bunch of jail time regardless of your issue? Also, would conviction on the charges related to you significantly add to it?
If not, and if you think being deposed and/or cross examined by a sleazeball lawyer would seriously lower your quality of life, I'd punt my charges knowing he was going away anyhow. I would still get a lifetime restraining order. I assume he's going to lose his job with the convictions anyhow.
However, it could be very helpful to society in general for you to do what you can to get an complete asshat off the street. So if you do decide to be deposed or take the stand, just make your answers as simple and memorable as possible and stick to your guns. Don't let the sleazeballs lead you anywhere.
Living on a smallish island is also tough - is testifying likely to raise any issues you'd prefer everyone didn't know about? Is this sleazeball lawyer likely to bring up your personal life? Medical conditions? Things you'd prefer out of the grapevine? Just a thought.
Otherwise, go get 'em and string 'em up by the nuts.
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This isn't really my area, but I do have one suggestion to make. Keep a good record of every contact you have with the guy. Write it down and make sure you keep the date, time and location too. This will accomplish a couple of things -- first it will help make your testimony far more accurate and reliable. Second, it will demonstrate your mental state at the time this was occurring. That is, it will show that you were creeped out seriously enough to keep a record of what was going on.
I am in no way qualified to advise you on your personal security. Do what the police tell you.
Do I understand that this guy works with you? How has your employer handled the situation. Have you made them aware of it?
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Aug, are you a member of the legal profession?
Anyway, yeah. I work for a public employer, and they are unfortunately held to an entirely different standard. I believe that they have to wait for the trial and an "innocent until proven guilty" verdict. With any other employer, if you had missed two weeks of work because you were in jail on felony charges, you would have been history. Alas. Not so here, I'm afraid.
Anyway, because I didn't document any of the creepy incidents with HR or the police, it does not look like the DA is going to prosecute him for stalking me. All my evidence would be "he said, she said". Sucks, don't it? Gah. I am really angry.
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Yes, I am an attorney.
Your employer has a duty to provide you a reasonably safe workplace where you are free from sexual (or other) harrassment. If you have made them aware of the situation they may have a responsibility to take action. I would suggest you document that you have made your supervisor aware of this problem and that you are uncomfortable about the situation. It doesn't have to be a formal, Pat-style letter. An e-mail would work. Just something that shows that you did tell them and when.
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It also sounds to me like he compromised your personal security with a work computer. Seems to me that a court case isn't necessary to deal with a serious infraction of what should be a work policy through administrative channels...At least, everywhere I worked, (all public employers until now :-( ) that would have been the case.
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It also sounds to me like he compromised your personal security with a work computer. Seems to me that a court case isn't necessary to deal with a serious infraction of what should be a work policy through administrative channels...At least, everywhere I worked, (all public employers until now :-( ) that would have been the case.
Well, one of our highest ranking officials was the one who told me that he had used his work computer to access my personal email. I started crying when I heard that bit of information, because I was terrified. I had the feeling like, "oh my god, this has escalated beyond what I thought was possible." It was hearing that he had compromised my personal email and work email that made me get the ex parte protective order and seek criminal charges against him.
However, now we are not so sure that he hacked into my email. I am not sure why I was told that, but the investigation continues.
Although I wish that we could press criminal charges for what the asshole did, it's not against the law to be creepy or an asshole. He didn't stop harrassing me despite my requests for him to leave me alone. However, once I threatened him with getting HR involved, he backed off. Although the guy was both creepy and an asshole to me, the District Attorney doesn't think that we have enough evidence to convince a jury beyond a reasonable doubt that he was stalking me. If he did access my personal information, I am going to get a long-term protective order against him. If he did not hack into my info, then it looks like the only strikes against him (in my case) are being creepy and inappropriate, but nothing that could bring criminal charges.
Anyway.
Aug, your signature is great. I love Katamari Damacy. I hear that it might come out for the PSP.
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There are many problems with living on an island, especially in a place with a lot more men than women. I hope this works out OK for you - hopefully he goes to jail on the other charges...what a #####*****, though.
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The nice thing about living on an island is that it's surrounded by water. I mean, couldn't this guy be out walking late one night and accidentally slip into the water and be carried out to sea and never seen or heard from again?
I mean, it's possible.
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The nice thing about living on an island is that it's surrounded by water. I mean, couldn't this guy be out walking late one night and accidentally slip into the water and be carried out to sea and never seen or heard from again?
I mean, it's possible.
I hate to say it Jough, I love your point of view, but I saw it coming. When I saw that you had responded to this post I knew you were gonna suggest that our dear Linnea murder her aggressor.
~Paul
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No no no, that's not it at all, Paul.
I just think that everyone can agree that it would be better for everyone if her problem just went away.
Murder is wrong and illegal, Paul.
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No no no, that's not it at all, Paul.
I just think that everyone can agree that it would be better for everyone if her problem just went away.
Murder is wrong and illegal, Paul.
Are you winking at me, stop that.
~Paul
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Ya know, anyone can just sort of "go away". You still with us, Paul?
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Who's got Frequent Flyer miles? Because, uhh, I got a few days. And there's a lot of water out there. That much water, you can't really dredge for nothing, right? You just gotta wait for things to wash up, and if you wrap something in chicken wire, who knows how long that'll be?
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It's cold there, too, so people would tend to wear heavy shoes, made out of heavy and warm things like... concrete.
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You don't need chicken wire or concrete. All you need is a powerboat, enough fuel to get to international water, and a bucket of chum.
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Actually, it turns out that with some....persuasion...humans make their own chum.
Persuasion is what I call my 10" diving knife.
I'm just saying.
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As much fun as it is to talk about eviscirating some creep, I don't think it's doing Linnea any good. I don't know if you are actually expecting usable advice or if you just wanted a shoulder to cry upon, but I wish I had something to tell you that could be of help. All I can do is pray for your safety.
~Paul
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Yeah, looks like we ran out of legitimate advice. But I do like the concept of self-chumming humans.
So, anyhow, you <did> say he's likely to get convictions for the stuff he did against his girlfriend, right? And you can get a standing restraining order against him in perpetuity?
Beyond him going to jail and you getting what little legal protection you can, I can't suggest much more beyond protecting yourself to the legal degree you are comfortable with. Karate Lessons? Pepper Spray? 9 MM? I'm OK with whatever you need to be comfortable in life. Also Aug's suggestion of clear and complete documentation of every interaction with the guy to strengthen your testimony or case later.
And make friends with some Army Rangers. They can pretty legally intimidate someone right out of your life if you need it.
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GRAND THEFT AUTO: Elbonia
FAQ by St_Zartan (excerpt)
***THIS FAQ MAY ONLY APPEAR ON THE FOLLOWING SITES:***
achewood.plagiarist.com
www.gamefaqs.com
www.firesofdarkness.com
2. *A Little Too Chummy*
Difficulty: 3/10
This mission is easy if you play it smart. First, be sure to have a knife. Go to the "R" on the map, and Somebody nice will tell you about her stalker. You've got until sunset before the stalker leaves the office, so start the mission around noon, then run down to the docks and kill a giraffeerman so you can change into his yellow rain slicker. You can't do it before you start the mission, because giraffeermen won't spawn there until you do... it's a stupid glitch
ANYWAY, you have to follow him silently and kill him before he gets into his car. He's parked right under a lamppost, so just be fast and slit his throat. Of course, you could just stab / shoot / run over the guy, too, but dumping his body will be really hard with Wanted Stars, and of course if a cop actually sees you with the body, it's instant Mission Failed (no one is supposed to know about this favor). Put the body in the trunk of your car (DON'T TAKE HIS) and drive back to the docks. Sigh...
Get aboard the trawler with the red arrow above it. Oh, this is why you put on the slicker earlier - if you get aboard a giraffeing boat without it, someone will call the cops, which makes this mission a lot harder than it has to be. Drag the body over to the giraffeing nets at the back of the boat; you'll see a cut scene where you tangle the body up in the net and dump it over the side. Now you just have to drive the boat around for a while, eventually you'll see dorsal fins and froth at the back of the boat. The game will tell you when the sharks are done eating ;)
Stop driving the boat and cut the net loose with your knife. (If you don't have a knife, you will have to sink the boat and swim to shore. After attracting all those sharks. Which is hard. FIGURE IT OUT) Drive the boat back to shore, go back to Somebody nice's office, and after a funny cut scene, it's Mission Passed.
Reward: $5000, Respect gained, Trawler Missions are now available.
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Zart, if I were ever producing a video game, I'd want you to write it.
Anyway, yeah, I couldn't really add anything helpful other than what has already been mentioned, other than to make sure all of your friends (up there) are aware of the problem so you have extra eyeballs looking out for you. I mean, I expect in a small town EVERYONE will know about this guy sooner rather than later, if they don't already. It's hard to do bad things when the entire town is watching you.
Also, I wouldn't recommend you keep a firearm handy (for obvious reasons) but it wouldn't hurt to know people who have them (as you probably already do).
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Also, I wouldn't recommend you keep a firearm handy (for obvious reasons) but it wouldn't hurt to know people who have them (as you probably already do).
I would. Especially in a state where everyone else has one. It's a lot easier (and effective) to shoot back than to run and dodge bullets. Particularly if the bad guy is drunk or high or crazy. Those first two, you'll probably have the advantage. The third, at least you'll be close to even.
IF you decide to go this route, take the courses and maintain your proficiency at the range. Nothing is as pathetic as a person trying to load and fire a gun who has done it once before and is, at the moment, panicked. Gun ownership, especially for the purpose of self defense, is a commitment. So, not a lighthearted suggestion but if that is what it takes to maintain a level of personal safe-feeling, I'd suggest it.
Oh, and Zart: outstanding.
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Zartan, that is perfect. I just thought you should know. Perfect.
Linnea, I'm truly sorry you have to work with such a creep, I hope he's convicted and sheltered from friendly society for a long time - but he makes excellent GTA fodder.
I look forward to this new version of GTA.
MORE TRAWLER MISSIONS
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Does that qualify as GTA Fanfic (cool if geeky) or Linnea Fanfic (just plain creepy)?
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Does that qualify as GTA Fanfic (cool if geeky) or Linnea Fanfic (just plain creepy)?
Pffffft. Now you're just pushing my buttons.
I intended it as a parody of video game FAQs (almost exclusively written by teenagers in a style that's deceptively tricky to mimic - and thank your lucky stars I spared you the ASCII art) and of this thread (which abruptly took a weird and increasingly graphically violent turn), but hey, I'm not going to party-crash your taxonomy. (Plus, OK, I didn't really have anything of any value to contribute to the discussion, being neither a lawyer nor a stone cold killa, but I wanted to offer some measure of comfort.)
Which is not to say that GTA: TOUAMB wouldn't be extremely interesting.
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Does that qualify as GTA Fanfic (cool if geeky) or Linnea Fanfic (just plain creepy)?
I was hoping at the end that he's specify that even if you complete the mission flawlessly that Somebody nice will not "thank" you. Because she's classy.
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Does that qualify as GTA Fanfic (cool if geeky) or Linnea Fanfic (just plain creepy)?
I was hoping at the end that he's specify that even if you complete the mission flawlessly that Somebody nice will not "thank" you. Because she's classy.
Actually, at the end, when you tell her that the dude is dead, like four or five guys come out of the bushes, all disappointed and suddenly surprised as hell to see each other - turns out she asked a bunch of people for help with the situation, who all independently had the same basic idea. You just happened to be the early bird.
I would not subject any of you, male or female, to the capricious whims of dumb fuck*ng thirteen-year-olds with a 12-pack of Mountain Dew and a "Hot Coffee" mod. Jesus Christ, CJ.
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Gee, Zart, I was just making a funny. I wouldn't really mistake your parody for an "homage" to our Somebody nice....
Somebody nice go get that gun ASAP
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Actually, at the end, when you tell her that the dude is dead, like four or five guys come out of the bushes, all disappointed and suddenly surprised as hell to see each other - turns out she asked a bunch of people for help with the situation, who all independently had the same basic idea. You just happened to be the early bird.
And then they all discuss a cartoon cat in a thong?
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I intended it as a parody of video game FAQs (almost exclusively written by teenagers in a style that's deceptively tricky to mimic - and thank your lucky stars I spared you the ASCII art) and of this thread (which abruptly took a weird and increasingly graphically violent turn), but hey, I'm not going to party-crash your taxonomy. (Plus, OK, I didn't really have anything of any value to contribute to the discussion, being neither a lawyer nor a stone cold killa, but I wanted to offer some measure of comfort.)
Which is not to say that GTA: TOUAMB wouldn't be extremely interesting.
The guy who sits next to me at work clearly writes/posts these at GameFAQs. And he's everything you've ever imagined. 23 (looks 17), lives at home, listens to the Metroid soundtrack at work, loves commercial radio, wants a Humvee, has an X-Men mini poster up in his cube, has a new VG wallpaper each week, and spends his breaks looking around online for sprites.
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I would [buy a firearm and keep it handy]
Would you also recommend a gun to someone who has a history of depression and lives in a place where it is dark for 16 hours of the day most of the year?
I'm just saying - firearms work for me but they are not for everyone.
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I would not pretend to know better than that person. I believe that adult people are inherently able to make adult decisions and that those who are not should be supervised appropriately.
Would you recommend access to alcohol for that person? An automobile? Sleeping pills? Kitchen knives and bathtubs? Household cleaners and solvents? It sounds like you're inferring that a gun would be too convenient for suicide. There are plenty of convenient methods available in the average home.
The truth is that a truly suicidal person will find a means to carry out their suicide in the absence of a firearm. Many tragically do and outside of institutionalizing someone, it is almost impossible to stop someone who truly wants to end their own life from doing so. Even in institutions, suicides still occur.
You can't defend yourself against an agenda-driven, mentally disturbed person if you are armed with a noosed rope, some sleeping pills, or the exhaust fumes from your car. I would rather someone have the wherewithal to defend themselves with extreme prejudice if there is a known threat. If Somebody nice were my sister, I would want her to have the best possible survival odds. I think a firearm
I could argue against people with vision problems using firearms more easily than against those you may categorize as potentially suicidal...the possibility of suicide vs the possibility of poor aim or misidentification of a target leading to a homicide to me raises a different issue with a totally different personal and social cost.
I'm not trying to make this personal; I'm just pointing out that we can assume things about other people but outside of their shoes, we probably should just appreciate that they, as we, have the right and the choice.
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Not to say anything about anyone else, but while a gun may not be more dangerous than a typical house full of crap for the truly dedicated suicidal, I personally do not own a gun for the reason Jough has described. I am not a dedicated suicidal and I do not want to die 99% of the time, and at the moments I contemplate it, I do not generally do so for long enough to carry it out by any means to which I have access. If I owned a gun and kept it 'safe but ready to use' for home defense purposes, it would drastically cut down on the preparation time that would be required to kill myself or at least fuck myself up severely, and thus proportionally increase the chance that I would do something in a stupid moment which could not later be undone in a saner one.
So, anyway, I guess my point is that "there are lots of ways to commit suicide" does not immediately equate to "guns are not a bad idea for an occasionally suicidal person to keep around". I'm not making this as a general statement about the larger discussion about Somebody nice and her maybe-stalker, just as a statement of the fallacy in the Dawg's argument being applied generally.
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I don't think there is a fallacy there. A difference of opinion, to be sure.
There is a world of difference between your ideations of killing yourself and being suicidal. Generally suicidal people plan their suicide. The plan will involve methods available to them. If a gun is in the house, maybe a gun. If not, a myriad of other methods are available, like electricity, suffocation, poison. If you are suicidal (and no need to confess that here) I hope that you are getting all the help you want and need to live the life you want to live.
A suicidal person doesn't need a gun to carry out the suicide. They will do what they need to do to accomplish their suicide.
A depressed person is not necessarily a suicidal person, also. Nor does that diagnosis abrogate their right to self-defense through legal means. The gun in the house is not an invitation to or a cause of suicide. There would be a lot more gun suicides if that were the case.
Ben, you shouldn't have a gun. Because you don't feel like it's a good idea for you. You made a choice, and a good one for you, and you can change your mind.
Other people also can and will make that choice wherever that choice is a legal one. Even if it's a bad idea for them.
Cigarrettes are still legal. You want to watch a slow suicide?
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Man, how did a thread about stalking get so serious and depressing? Remeber the good times we had? Like when Zart wrote that FAQ and a good laugh was had by all. Those were the days.
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Good point. I call for a split and then a lock on the split thread. I recant all my statements and am now a liberal who wants all guns melted down into spoons which should be distributed to the homeless.
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Let's get back to the Grand Theft Auto: Elbonia, shall we?
It reminds me of a guy I knew from Eagle River (more towards the central part of AK, but in Alaska the crazy never stops) who used to blow up cars. You know, recreationally. I assume most of them were junked, but who knows?
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It reminds me of a guy I knew from Eagle River (more towards the central part of AK, but in Alaska the crazy never stops) who used to blow up cars. You know, recreationally. I assume most of them were junked, but who knows?
In 7th grade, I had a science teacher who once spent an entire class period showing us a video of the time he burned down an old shed on his ranch. I swear to God; it was called "Towering Inferno '86!" (title from cassette label) and it was surprisingly dull. I realize those two sentences raise a lot of questions, all beginning with the word "why" - and I don't know.
I don't know anything about anything, really.
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It reminds me of a guy I knew from Eagle River (more towards the central part of AK, but in Alaska the crazy never stops) who used to blow up cars. You know, recreationally. I assume most of them were junked, but who knows?
In 7th grade, I had a science teacher who once spent an entire class period showing us a video of the time he burned down an old shed on his ranch. I swear to God; it was called "Towering Inferno '86!" (title from cassette label) and it was surprisingly dull. I realize those two sentences raise a lot of questions, all beginning with the word "why" - and I don't know.
I don't know anything about anything, really.
The combination of "Towering Inferno '86!" and "surprisingly dull" makes this anecdote win. I suspect that fire may just be one of those many things in life that is magical to experience in person but loses its luster when preserved on videotape and rewatched.
I am reminded of the Paper Inferno from the end of this last academic year, though, in which a few of us got together and burned copious quantities of papers, topped off by no less than three copies of one poor bastard's often-edited thesis. Cathartastic!
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How towering can a shed be?
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How towering can a shed be?
Yeah, see, exactly.
The most engaging thing I remember from the video is a voice off-camera saying "Steve, my beer's getting warm"; at that age, the Very Idea of Beer was grown-up and edgy, so you had better believe that got a big laugh.
Still, you'd be surprised - or, maybe not - at just how high the flames can climb from even a puny structure when the fire's been set by someone truly dedicated to the craft of controlled arson. I mean, I guess.
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if the dude was breaking into your work email,
and if i recall you work for a municipality,
then your superiors need to be alerted ASAP
as i know of no municipality that does not have
a computer/netowork use policy.
unless you gave him your password.
you need to express the situation to your boss/superior,
as not only are you at risk but your coworkers are at
risk from the behaviors you have described.
i disagree with the other sentiments inre: let him ride
on other charges and hope that conviction on them
follows.
if you were wronged, prosecute that wrong or let it go,
as hoping for justice from your wrong on the conviction
of some other wrong is just setting yourself up
for severe distress if those other wrongs to others
do not lead to conviction.
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Ark, as always your line breaks and lack of capitalization have turned sound advice into modern verse. I know this is basically a noise post (as opposed to signal) but it just really struck me this time. Mainly the first "stanza" (up to the word password.)
EDIT: Not to get back into the depressing stuff, but a clarification: Dawg, my statement was not "(the fallacy in the Dawg's argument) being applied generally" but "the fallacy in (the Dawg's argument being applied generally)". That is, that your statement about whether folks who got Depression should have guns is something that, like mine, cannot be applied universally but should rather be examined case by case. This sounds obvious but at the time I wrote it some of what you were saying about what suicidal people Are Like seemed to be applied uncomfortably broadly.
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The first "stanza" and the sudden break for the "password" sentence really is gold, yeah. It creates beautiful emphasis.
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Spoons for the homeless!
Spoon a homeless man (or woman) today!
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Where is Somebody nice?
~Paul
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Where is Somebody nice?
Alaska, dude, try and keep up.
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just because you may or may not be homeless and/or depressed does not mean that you would not enjoy some quality time spent spooning.
i apologize for the formatting of the above post, state-based learning strikes again (3 cheers for jameson's).
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Well, as someone who generally carries a firearm on his person AND has very poor vision and low depth perception, I can see how I would be more dangerous both to myself and others than day, someone who has hell of depression.
I mean, I had lunch with Wombat and she remained utterly BULLET-HOLE-FREE. I did not shoot her even ONCE. So how much of a problem could my carrying a concealed weapon(s) really be?
But while people may be grown-ups and are capable of making their own decisions I would not recommend a firearm to someone else unless they were certain they needed one.
I'm of the "better to have it and not need it than need it and not have it" camp, but then again, my moral disposition is not predicated on the ethos that all life is sacred and precious. Sometimes some people just need to fuck*ng die.
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Well now let's not forget that at least part of that time I had a snake to defend myself with.
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Gee, I guess it was just a question of who was toting a more potent phallic symbol.
THANK YOUR LUCKY STARS FOR CULTURAL ARCHETYPES, WOMBAT
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Jesu Christo, you guys rock so hard. I love you guys so much.
Joughypantalones, you have no idea how many people we "lose" around here. You've got the ice-cold Bering Sea with strong currents. It is quite rare when our divers can actually recover a body.
Not only that, but we also have a lot of WWII bunkers. There is a strong consensus that a lot of people have probably fallen in them (or climbed in them to sleep) and then suffocated due to the hypoxic environment of an underground bunker. These bunkers are all over the island, and to my knowledge there are no maps showing the locations of all of them.
GTA:Elbonia sounds like a rad idea. Everyone here is so protective. People at the fire hall are like my family (it is especially awesome because it's like having two dozen bratty-ass brothers). Of course, being an EMT and now a firefighter, I have my radio. I keep it with me 24/7 on the weeks that I'm on-call, and I keep it tuned to the fire frequency when I'm not on call as an EMT. Once Mr. Creepy Asshole comes back, I am going to keep my radio with me all the time.
If something happens, then dispatch will receive a radio transmission something like this: "Station, this is EMS 29. I have a 10-69, repeat, 10-69, stalker violating my protective order and he's got a gun. Repeat, 10-69." And then the entire police department would show up to save the day. 10-69 means "officer needs emergency assistance".
Not only that, but a bunch of my friends have been taking me to the shooting range and a friend even lent me a family heirloom -- his grandfather's sidearm from when his grandpa headed up the homicide department in Portland. It's a .357, and I love it. Despite having problems with the hell of depression in the past, I am fine with having it. I will never buy any sort of firearm, and I will return the revolver when my friend gets back into town.
Arkabee, I do work for a local government. They are still investigating the whole matter. So far it looks like Mr. Creepy only has the felony and misdemeanor domestic violence charges against him for stalking his ex-girlfriend. We'll see if the City presses charges against him.
Dang, I have not even addressed half of the things you guys have brought up. I need to go to the little girls' room, so I'll be back in a little while with another post.
Again, I love you guys. Thank you for all the support.
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Somebody nice: Good going. Be safe with that and hope that your police deal with the guy before you have to. But if you have to, keep your lead in a tight cluster high in the center of the torso.
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But if you have to, keep your lead in a tight cluster high in the center of the torso.
Does that mean "aim right above his crank?"
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I'd interpret "high in the center of the torso" to be more the sternum area - if I were a female shooting a creepy/dangerous man in the crank area, I'd be aiming dead on, not messing around. Of course, if he's determined, that sort of thing might not even immobilize.
We certainly know how to get off-topic, don't we?
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We certainly know how to get off-topic, don't we?
It's a beautiful thing.
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LET'S BE FRANK: TWO IN THE CRANK
That is a helpful mnemonic device about shooting an assailant twice in the genitals (pref. c*ck). I am looking into licensing potential (foam can holders, trucker hats, t-shirts w/ optional Confederate flag device), so if anyone uses it as a sig on an Internet message board, get ready for a lawsuit.
Somebody nice: the entire police and fire departments have got your back? And to think we were worried!
Of course, I don't know if I can be seen helping out an authority figure.
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Of course, I don't know if I can be seen helping out an authority figure.
Damn The Man!
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I always assumed that torso referred to the area around the hips.
Now I've ruined everything.
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I'd interpret "high in the center of the torso" to be more the sternum area - if I were a female shooting a creepy/dangerous man in the crank area, I'd be aiming dead on, not messing around. Of course, if he's determined, that sort of thing might not even immobilize.
We certainly know how to get off-topic, don't we?
I think a magnum slug in the sternum would pretty much stop you permanently. And, yep, high torso is pretty much around the sternum. It's the widest part of a normal sized guy and has the most soft, vulnerable and highly necessary organs in it. I would save the 'crank' shot for after he's down but before he's dead if it's 'necessary'.
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I'd have to say, if I was picking a woman to stalk, I probably wouldn't choose one that knows and hangs out with the entire fire/police department. I'm reminded of that episode of Family Guy where...well, this is how it will go.
SIRENS
Stalker Dude in Car- Umm, hi, officer, was I speeding?
Police Officer- Aren't you that guy who was stalking Somebody nice?
SDIC- Well, I wouldn't say that...
PO- *Into radio* Perp's becoming belligerent!
SDIC- Wait, what?
PO- *Into radio* I NEED BACKUP!
SDIC- Now, wait...
PO- *Into radio* OFFICER DOWN! *collapses*
35 cops come and beat the shit out of the guy. I imagine this would happen every time he left his house.
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He is one stupid motherfucker if he tries to pull any shit. He will go to the state pen posthaste if he thinks he can hurt me or my kitties and get away with it. He screwed up big time. Plus, he threatened his ex-girlfriend and her children if he lost his job. Talk about scum. Anyway, I know just about everyone in our fire/police department, and many of them are good friends of mine. I'm an EMT-1, a probationary firefighter, and a member of our tactical rescue team. I have learned a lot in the 11 months that I have been here thus far.
Most people in this community are good-hearted, and I have made a pointed effort to let as many people know as possible what this guy did. I don't want him to think that he can just skulk back into town and slip unnoticed back into his daily routine. My boss is awesome - she has been so supportive during this whole thing. I have learned a lot, both from the experience and from guidance I've received.
At any rate, I don't have any documentation or eyewitnesses to vouch that he stalked me, so the DA cannot press charges against him for stalking me. Like I said, we'll wait and see what happens.
<3
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I get a feeling that state prison in Alaska is one bad fuck*ng place to be.
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emphasis on 'bad fuck*ng'.
There's a world of difference between a bad-ass fuck*ng and a bad ass-fuck*ng. If you know what I mean.
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hi ya linnea,
Unfortunatly I was also once stalked and also dealt pretty closely with another friend's aunt getting stalked and assulted by her ex-husband.
Just a few notes of advice(I just had a quick review of the thread, so sorry if I repeat anything anyone else recommended):
- Have someone be a check-in buddy until the fucker is locked away or gone away: make it someone who lives as close to you as possible so you can get to them even if your phone line is cut. Give this person a copy of your work schedule, and also check in with them on a daily basis. Exchange keys with your buddy so that you have an additional safe place to go, and so they can check in on you even if you can't answer the phone. If you're going to do anything/ go anywhere that's slightly out of the norm for you, let them know when you're leaving and when to expect your return. Unless totally nessisary, don't be alone. If possible get a cell phone, if not, always know where the nearest phone is.
- Make sure everyone you work with, your friends, your family etc. knows what this guys name is, that he is a potentially dangerous stalker, and that they are not to share and info with him about you. This might sound basic, but the guy who was stalking me showed up at my work when I wasn't there, and since the employee who was there didn't know the situation, and she thought he was "cute" she actually revealed two weeks of my schedule to him. People can be easily charmed, especially by someone whose particularly messed up and manipulative. Also, if you talk openly with other people you might find out about things that you may not even know were going on between this guy and other people he's been harrassing.
- If you haven't already taken a women's self defence course, take one. I've used the skills I learnt in self-defence a couple of times, and it's great to just have those reflexes programmed in. Even if you plan on keeping a gun around, it is more likely that you will be attacked when it is not in your hands, so knowing what to do to keep yourself safe and incapacitate your attacker is your best bet. If self-defense classes aren't available in your neck of the woods, remember that for most people if you drive your thumb or fingers into their eyes that their reflex reaction will be to release their hold on you to protect themselves. This should buy you the valuable time you need to get away.
- Get your workplace's policy against harassment in wrighting, share it with any superiors and coworkers who aren't already familiar with it, learn it inside out and keep it on hand, in case an issue arises. Also find out if your employer has any sort of policy for stress leave, and if the situation gets to hairy, take it.
- Follow whatever course you can to apply for a restraining order against the guy. It sounds like you've got a case where you may not be able to act unless his actions against you escalate, so you may be at a point right now where you can't do anything except hope it doesn't get worse, which is an awful spot to be in, but being educated on exactly what you'll need to do when/if it's appropriate to apply for the order can only make things easier should you have to follow that course.
- Always take this seriously. I don't want to go into details about some of the horrible things that went down with one person I know, but all I will tell you is that she allowed her stalker (her ex-husband) to get back in touch with her because he seemed to be better, had supposedly gotten treatment in jail, etc. and now she is no longer with us and her kids have no parents.
Frustrating as it is, the best thing you can do is stick with this, keep a network of good people around you (sounds like your on top of this), and hopefully see this guy either behind bars or driven out of town.
Stay strong sista'
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smells, thank you. That is some hella good advice, which is why I started this thread in the first place.
I am taking a concealed-carry class so that I'll be a deadeye shot. My dream is to be like Clarice Starling, where my training is so damn slick that I can shoot Buffalo Bill in the pitch dark. A new dream of mine is to be a tactical medic (such as one who goes with SWAT teams). How rad would that be? Daaaaamn.
I also studied Brazilian jiu-jitsu for six months when I lived in Boulder. My ex-fiance was a huge fan of martial arts, and he made sure that I did all the self-defense stuff.
Anyway, I just heard from the district attorney!
Mr. Stalker is going to stay in Anchorage, which is 800 miles away from here. Yaaaay!
He was let out on bail, but his conditions were that he had to leave our island, and he has to have a third-party custodian. Ha, ha! A 3rd-party custodian means that you have to be within eyesight and earshot of this person 24/7. If you are allowed to go back to work, you have to have a custodian with you at home, and another custodian when you go to work (unless you have someone who is willing to follow you around 24/7).
Anyway, he's gonna stay in Anchorage but he wants to dump the custodian. Can't say I blame him, because having a custodian would suck, but the motherfcuker brought it all upon himself. He made his bed, now he gets to lie in it. but I don't give a flying fcuk what he does unless he a.) comes back here, or b.) hurts someone. As long as he crawls back under the rock from under which he came, I don't care about him.
The chances are hopefully good that he won't come back. Good riddance to bad rubbish.
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He has to have a guy with a lot of keys, a pushbroom and a bag of that sawdust vomit-picker-upper around 24-7?
That would suck.
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Yeah, fo'reals. I just cannot imagine what would make someone snap like that.
Her: I think we should see other people
Him: "You fuckin bitch, you broke my heart!"
Him: *compulsively following her around, like that's possible to do surreptitiously on a tiny island*
Him: *breaking into her house, calling people from her phone book* "Yah I been fuckin her all week man!"
Him: *vandalizes her car* "You fuckin bitch I'll kill you and your kids if you make me lose my job"
Her: *calls police*
JAILARITY
&c.
As a convicted felon, he'll be lucky to get a job sweeping floors -- once he gets outta the state penitentary.
What did he honestly think? That by vandalizing her car and breaking into her house, she'd somehow come to her senses and say, "OMG BABY, you are the only man for me. I love you so much! You cared enough to break into my house and vandalize my car. THAT IS TRUE LOVE."
Christ. Give me a break. At any rate, I'm going to start an office pool. Five bucks says that he suffocates to death during his first month in the state pen while tossing his cellmate's salad.
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Five bucks says that he suffocates to death during his first month in the state pen while tossing his cellmate's salad.
You are cold, Linnea. You are ice cold. I like that about you.
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What did he honestly think? That by vandalizing her car and breaking into her house, she'd somehow come to her senses and say, "OMG BABY, you are the only man for me. I love you so much! You cared enough to break into my house and vandalize my car. THAT IS TRUE LOVE."
Christ. Give me a break. At any rate, I'm going to start an office pool. Five bucks says that he suffocates to death during his first month in the state pen while tossing his cellmate's salad.
Dang, this guy sounds like a Darwin Award waiting to happen. You might not need to use that gun after all. (Except against Polar Bears. I hear those things are mean.)
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Yeah, from watching HBO I've learned that in a salad tossing situation you should always choose the syrup over the jelly.
Good advice from Smells. And good news that he's been voted off the island.
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the best bit of opinion on fire-arms as self-protection i've ever heard:
if you are going to have a gun to protect yourself, you will have to change the entirety of your lifestyle to revolve (in the beginning) around the idea of carrying your weapon at all times. you will sleep with your gun. when you get off work, you will not look forward to going giraffeing, you will look forward to going home and cleaning your pistol and practicing field-stripping it blindfolded. it will stop being a piece of metal, and it will become another body part that you are in control of at all times. once it becomes as much a part of you as anything else is, then you can start to do other things.
because if you look at your gun and think "gun" rather than naturally move your body, point, and think "dead" then you will not be able to protect yourself with your gun but will have to protect yourself from your gun.
--
dude was a cop once, then went to law school. not sure if he might be a bit extreme about it all, and i paraphrased, been awhile sicne that conversation happened, but he has an excellent point.
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No one remotely interested in gun safety would ever publicly advocate sleeping with a firearm. I agree with the sentiment that gun owership and intention for the gun to be a primary means of home/self defense is a commitment and requires investiment of time and effort to make sure that the gun owner is knowledgable and capable of safely owning and, if necessary, proficiently using a firearm.
And people whose children find and manage to fire or use their weapons should be charged with felony crimes, including sharing any charges their children are charged with. There is no excuse for a firearm falling into the hands of a kid.
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And people whose children find and manage to fire or use their weapons should be charged with felony crimes, including sharing any charges their children are charged with. There is no excuse for a firearm falling into the hands of a kid.
We live in the land of unintended consequenses. People try to keep guns away from kids because they fear for their safety, so when idiot kid who has no idea what a gun can do gets his hand on it he treats it like a toy. Bang, he kills himself or one of his friends. People who familarize their children with weapons and demonstrate the awesome power they contain virtually never misuse a firearm by mistake.
~Paul
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I originally had a two page rant here.
Then I realized that I'm from a totally different country, and that my ways are not your ways, and that there's no changing that.
So go ahead you crazy Yanks, shoot each other to bits for all I care.*
* Of course I don't mean this, but jeeze, it's just become abundantly clear to me how dis-similar our two similar countries are. In my neck of the woods several of the opinions above would be found only in the minds of weirdos who live in sheds without electricity.
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A much larger percentage of Canadians own guns than do Americans. Canada is one gun-toting country, with a gun of some sort per every FOUR citizens!
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Jough, I didn't refer to the amount of guns, but the attitude towards having them, and what they are used for. That's what totally blows my mind. I've heard similar stats in regard to Canadian gun ownership, (Bowling for Columbine claims we have approx 7 million guns for approx 30 m people) but when people use these stats they fail to acknowledge that these numbers refer mostly to hunting rifles, not weapons used for "protection." Yes, out on the farm, almost every family has a gun, but this is something used to get rid of foxes or shoot a deer for a tasty dinner. On my SO's parents' farm they use a pellet gun to deal with predators and crop stealers instead of a gun, since they don't hunt.
AD, having spent a good deal of time working with tweens and teens, I know that a good 90 - 99% of them know exactly where their parents hide the booze, know exactly where the keys to the gun cabinet are, and have a pretty good run-down of where any contraband (Playboy, Joy of Sex, etc.) that their parents think they've supposedly hidden from them is. I also know that they will bring these things in to class to show their friends. Kids basically fetish-ise anything adult.
And Paul, it's not just the badly parented kids who get into the dangerous situations, guns or otherwise. The well parented kids and the badly parented kids don't exist in a vaccume, their paths constantly cross. Curiosity wins out over everything else sometimes, or the desire to impress peers, etc. If it's in the house the kids are venerable - trigger lock, bullet proof cabinet, "respect for the weapon," whatever.
Anyway, I know there's no point in speaking Canadian to you people, eh? You totally don't get what I'm talking abooot, so I'll shut up now, okay?
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I also do not advocate sleeping with a firearm, if only so that I won't "answer" my pistol and blow my head off when the phone on my nightstand rings. Darwin award!
I have to say that I think that people should be allowed to own guns; however, I also advocate a system that requires registration. In some states, for example, the gun company fires 2 test rounds and sends the spent casings to a government repository so that they can be referenced by forensic experts should the need arise. The system's not perfect, of course. I hear that you can do things to your firearm once you receive it that can throw the tests off.
There is a huge difference between keeping a couple of shell casings in a huge database, and oh -- say, fingerprinting all babies at birth like they wanted to do in Malaysia or something. Of course, criminals will always have guns. I think that it's important for law-abiding citizens to also have the right to bear arms. And I also think it's important for people who might have difficulty keeping themselves safe (such as people who are suicidal) to be barred from buying a gun. I'm just saying.
Anyway, the stalker's bail hearing got pushed back AGAIN. What are his defense lawyers trying to do? I suspect that they're trying to finangle some sort of deal...I expect that I'll show up at the courthouse later today and find out that Mr. Creepy Asshole has called a bunch of people as character witnesses.
At any rate, I hope that I can stay calm and such if I have to get questioned by Mr. Asshole's rat-bastard lawyers.
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AD, having spent a good deal of time working with tweens and teens, I know that a good 90 - 99% of them know exactly where their parents hide the booze, know exactly where the keys to the gun cabinet are, and have a pretty good run-down of where any contraband (Playboy, Joy of Sex, etc.) that their parents think they've supposedly hidden from them is. I also know that they will bring these things in to class to show their friends. Kids basically fetish-ise anything adult.
All your statements are true. What I think, though, is that they in no way ameliorate the parent's responsibility for what happens if their kids get into any of this stuff; nor does it allow them to let the mechanical devices (locks, doors, cables, etc.) do the parenting. Counseling kids is important, but once they've been let down by their parents in terms of lack of skill, tools, support or experience in setting limits, appropriately policing behavior and instilling values, the counselor is in the position of responding to things that in most cases could and should have been prevented (and have negative psychological effects of their own that start snowballing) I think that in general we hold parents to low standards of parenting, give people too many easy fixes (ritalin and anti-depressants are over prescribed too kids) and worst of all, don't give parents opportunities to seek support and help if they need it in a non-judgmental environment.
Asherdan has it right on. It's so important to approach things like this practically. It instills respect for the gun in the kid and I'm sure he views his shooting time with dad as a privilege he could lose if he does something unsafe or stupid.
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I have no opinions whatsoever on guns.
Anyway, great news about That Rat Bastard. Keep us updated. I'm actually betting he'll get shived!
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The episode of Bullshit on guns should be required viewing for all Americans. Quite frankly, pretty much that entire series should be.
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anyone watching the show "Brat Camp" on abc? if you want to be filled with rage, watch that show. the girl who lies all the time, her parents, oh my.
oh my.
i think the problem with problems like "gun control" (or however you want to phrase it), is that the problem is never with the folks having the discussion,
it's with the people who aren't, won't, will never.
regardless of how you are protecting/locking/storing your firearms, if you have some logical reasoning formulated for storing them in a way that meets specific goals you set, then i'm not going to bet on you, i'm going to bet on the person who didn't worry about it, who didn't/doesn't/will never care, because those are winning odds.
inre: lawyers and etc, i got a "funny" email forwarded yesterday, some george carlin quotes. and since the topic drifted to guns, i'm going to toss a hand grenade (but meant in a good way):
"The real reason that we can't have the Ten Commandments in a
Courthouse! You cannot post "Thou Shalt Not Steal," "Thou Shalt Not
Commit Adultery" and "Thou Shall Not Lie" in a building full of lawyers,
judges and politicians! It creates a hostile work environment!"
ha, ha. i think we can all agree on that.
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anyone watching the show "Brat Camp" on abc? if you want to be filled with rage, watch that show. the girl who lies all the time, her parents, oh my.
oh my.
i think the problem with problems like "gun control" (or however you want to phrase it), is that the problem is never with the folks having the discussion,
it's with the people who aren't, won't, will never.
regardless of how you are protecting/locking/storing your firearms, if you have some logical reasoning formulated for storing them in a way that meets specific goals you set, then i'm not going to bet on you, i'm going to bet on the person who didn't worry about it, who didn't/doesn't/will never care, because those are winning odds.
inre: lawyers and etc, i got a "funny" email forwarded yesterday, some george carlin quotes. and since the topic drifted to guns, i'm going to toss a hand grenade (but meant in a good way):
"The real reason that we can't have the Ten Commandments in a
Courthouse! You cannot post "Thou Shalt Not Steal," "Thou Shalt Not
Commit Adultery" and "Thou Shall Not Lie" in a building full of lawyers,
judges and politicians! It creates a hostile work environment!"
ha, ha. i think we can all agree on that.
I've often wondered what would happen if you put up a plaque that said
"thou shalt not steal" and then referenced the statute and the statute language for the state or jurisidiction right under it. Would the arguement against the commandments being posted still stand? It would be an interesting experiment.
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I have no opinions whatsoever on guns.
Anyway, great news about That Rat Bastard. Keep us updated. I'm actually betting he'll get shived!
Oooh! I had forgotten about shivs. Hmm...what do you think, a sharpened spoon maybe? How the hell do you make a shiv in prison?
I also would like to wager that he'd be a queen bee, and he might very well die in the manner that Blister said. http://www.achewood.com/index.php?date=01262005
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Classic prison shivs include:
Bedsprings
small pieces of metal from a shop or a work detail
Broken off and sharpened plastic (tooth brush is classic)
silverware from the mess hall
Shards of bone from your enemies
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I wouldn't have pegged Asherdan and AlohaDawg as the board members most likely to know how to make a shiv in prison. Shows what I know.
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You can also escape if you have a tiny geologists hammer and a poster of Rita Hayworth.
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You can also escape if you have a tiny geologists hammer and a poster of Rita Hayworth.
Oh man, extra points for Shawshank Redemption quotes.
Actually, it is funny that you mention the geologist's hammer since the stalker has a degree in geology. Scary fun fact of the day. He always claimed to be a geologist, but a four-year degree does not a geologist make. IMHO, you would have to have a graduate degree before you could claim that kind of malarkey.
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I've often wondered what would happen if you put up a plaque that said "thou shalt not steal" and then referenced the statute and the statute language for the state or jurisidiction right under it. Would the arguement against the commandments being posted still stand? It would be an interesting experiment.
I've often wondered what would happen if people started using bibles that were translated into to actual regular English instead of all this arbitrary "thou" and "begat" crap.
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I've often wondered what would happen if you put up a plaque that said "thou shalt not steal" and then referenced the statute and the statute language for the state or jurisidiction right under it. Would the arguement against the commandments being posted still stand? It would be an interesting experiment.
I've often wondered what would happen if people started using bibles that were translated into to actual regular English instead of all this arbitrary "thou" and "begat" crap.
Uh, not to derail, but such editions exist. I bought and read for a class last semester a translation of Genesis that was done in modern English, with the only archaisms retained ones that enhanced meaning. It was very well-done and interesting reading throughout, even the weird bits about Abraham growing 70 meters tall and shit.
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I've often wondered what would happen if you put up a plaque that said "thou shalt not steal" and then referenced the statute and the statute language for the state or jurisidiction right under it. Would the arguement against the commandments being posted still stand? It would be an interesting experiment.
I've often wondered what would happen if people started using bibles that were translated into to actual regular English instead of all this arbitrary "thou" and "begat" crap.
Uh, not to derail, but such editions exist. I bought and read for a class last semester a translation of Genesis that was done in modern English, with the only archaisms retained ones that enhanced meaning. It was very well-done and interesting reading throughout, even the weird bits about Abraham growing 70 meters tall and shit.
I know they exist but they're not exactly being read at mass or anything.
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Oh, oh, linnea - do you by any chance watch Oprah? I never used to, but since I'm off for the summer, I tend to see more daytime TV than the average person. There was an episode of Oprah with Lisa Ling, (a re-run that I've actually seen twice, where she went to a mens' prision for a month. They showed all the weapons that had been confiscated in a recent sweep, and talked about how the main way that shives make it in to prison are 1) they're made there (I hear AD and Ash are working on an instructional how-to video - makes a great post-sentencing gift, BTW!) and 2) they're keistered in. That's right, up the butt. I hope your stalker friend tries to smuggle something in. Something that gets... discovered... and confiscated. On the show I watched they showed all the things that were keistered into the prison, and some of them were disturbingly large, and some of them... well it was just confusing... the how, and the why.
Also, I love that the guy has been faking being a geologist, I mean, come on, if you're gonna fake a profession, why not fake something cool. How does one fake being a geologist? Why does one fake being a geologist? Does it attract the ladies or something? Cause I know for me, whether my geologist has his papers or not is totally what determins it for me.
Fake Geologist Theatre:
"I find this rock from the paleozoic period to be especially interesting."
"Dude, that's totally a poo that you're holding."
"No it's a rock."
"No, guy, it's totally a poo. It's a poo."
"Oh, well it does come from the paleozoic period."
"No, it's from my dog. My dog just pooed and now you're holding it."
"Oh."
"Yeah"
"Oh."
"Gawd, you suck so hard."
"Oh."
"It's because you're a fake geologist that you suck."
"Oh."
"Yeah."
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During one of my fun former jobs I used to visit a men's correctional facility once a month and had to hang out in shakedown for the inmates I had to interview.
That's the room they march them into, stip them down and make them perform several choreographed maneuvers to ensure no smuggling is happening which includes bending over, spreading your cheeks, squatting, lifting one foot and then the other, all while naked.
Some the guards were way too into making the inmates dance and one was especially fond of the rubber glove. It was disturbing.
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Some the guards were way too into making the inmates dance and one was especially fond of the rubber glove. It was disturbing.
Never in my wildest dreams would I have imagined that careers in law enforcement and / or corrections would have been a magnet for sadists.
Prison rape
Oh, and people? Coyly paraphrasing a Chris Rock routine doesn't really change the fact that you are, basically, saying "I hope someone gets violently raped". This guy may be an assjack with a seriously tenuous grip on reality who desperately needs a time-out from society, but come on - realizing that there is a distinct possibility that a human being will be raped in prison and not giving a damn, or worse, actually finding it grimly satisfying, doesn't really give you the moral high ground.
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Oh, and people? Coyly paraphrasing a Chris Rock routine doesn't really change the fact that you are, basically, saying "I hope someone gets violently raped". This guy may be an assjack with a seriously tenuous grip on reality who desperately needs a time-out from society, but come on - realizing that there is a distinct possibility that a human being will be raped in prison and not giving a damn, or worse, actually finding it grimly satisfying, doesn't really give you the moral high ground.
That's right, you tell 'em Zart, we don't believe in cruel and unusual punishment here in Texas.
~Paul
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I know they exist but they're not exactly being read at mass or anything.
They are in widespread use in most evangelical denominations.
~Paul
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I also would like to wager that he'd be a queen bee, and he might very well die in the manner that Blister said. http://www.achewood.com/index.php?date=01262005
Someone said that the strip had returned to form. Reading this strip from seven or six months ago tells me that it ain't so.
~Paul
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Oh, and people? Coyly paraphrasing a Chris Rock routine doesn't really change the fact that you are, basically, saying "I hope someone gets violently raped". This guy may be an assjack with a seriously tenuous grip on reality who desperately needs a time-out from society, but come on - realizing that there is a distinct possibility that a human being will be raped in prison and not giving a damn, or worse, actually finding it grimly satisfying, doesn't really give you the moral high ground.
I have to respectfully disagree. I believe that we were engaging in a bit of "gallows humor." Getting stalked is terrifying. It changes your life. You feel defenseless (even if you have a bunch of people who are watching your back), and it helps to think that the perp will meet his comeuppance.
Gallows humor is vastly different than actually buying a carton of smokes and a few toilet plungers and then sweet-talking the warden into gifting them to a couple of his most sadistic behemoths.
Also, our conversation did not solely revolve around violent prison rape. I believe that we were also talking about shivs and inmates storing junk in their respective trunks. Prison is not a nice place to be, just like Mr. Asshole's defense lawyers are not being paid to be nice to the victims. They get to lie about Mr. Asshoe's ex girlfriend and call her a mentally ill nymphomaniac on the stand and watch her cry as she tries to make them stop.
Anyway, I am sure that Pruno (Nice Pete's schnapps/rocket fuel that he made from raisins) and cigarettes will also factor heavily into Mr. Asshole's new life in the state penitentary.
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Paul: Teaching most definitely is a positive solution.
Keeping kids ignorant about guns makes about as much sense as abstinense only sex education and just say no drug education.
The Boy knows how to use a gun...
(http://www.paulmcrae.com/images/Miscellany/Misc/BOY_GUN/DSCN1589-E-400.jpg)
Gun safety is all about education...
(http://www.paulmcrae.com/images/Miscellany/Misc/BOY_GUN/DSCN1586-E-400.jpg)
My Dad reminds us that gun control means hitting your target...
(http://www.paulmcrae.com/images/Miscellany/Misc/BOY_GUN/DSCN1590-E-400.jpg)
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That's a nice grouping there, Paul.
Also, is The Boy your son or other relative, or one of the neighbourhood kids who comes around to shoot guns and eat ribs?
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Also, is The Boy your son or other relative, or one of the neighbourhood kids who comes around to shoot guns and eat ribs?
It's best not to ask too many questions.
~Paul
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Ash, how much time did you spend inside?
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Again, it's best not to ask too many questions. Let's keep as Ash as our friend, I say.
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Ash, post a dang footnote for your references!
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Anyway, I am sure that Pruno (Nice Pete's schnapps/rocket fuel that he made from raisins) and cigarettes will also factor heavily into Mr. Asshole's new life in the state penitentary.
OK you brought up another favourite, not me.
Good Pruno is a science. (...very well researched article on jailhouse hooch...)
ALSO: I really don't give a toss for whether or not the jail rape comments are serious or 'gallows humour'. If convicted, Mr. Asshole has to root hog or die as a result of his own actions.
ANOTHER NOTE: If convicted as an abuser of women and sent to a mid security yard* or higher, the 'upright cons' will exile his ass on arrival once word gets around**. This means he won't get the protection of hanging out with his own group of dudes from the same geographic/racial background. In essence, he will be free meat to steal from and fuck with, and perhaps even just to fuck. Dude will have every chance he's ever wanted to prove just how mentally and physically tough he is in the game of survival.
To sum up: If he's convicted, either through plea or a trial, I don't care what happens to him due to his own friggin' actions. What I can hope is that he emerges debt paid and understanding how to be a man, not a shitstain. It's all on him. He's on the ugly train to grow-up town.
*If sent to a low security yard his life will be easier as there are fewer thugs and most dudes are just skating towards an oncoming release date.
**Assuming he is caucasion. Other racial groups have different and varying sensitivities on the issue.
Ash, that is one hell of great article. Thank you.
Also, smells, the geologist thing made me come this close to peeing my ##### from laughing so hard. The dude is seriously unhinged.
As far as the "growing up" bit...When I first met Mr. Asshole, I thought that he was somewhere close to my age (I am in my mid-twenties). Turns out the guy is 45. He still hasn't grown up, so we'll see what happens to him in prison.
The lame part is that the criminal trial (felony charges) could take up to a year. Meanwhile he will be free on bond.
Good news is that he's staying off the island for a while longer.
Bad news = the judge let him drop his "third-party custodian". That measure gave a lot of protection to his victims because he had to remain within eyesight of this person twenty-four hours a day, AND that person would automatically be held liable if Mr. Asshole committed a crime while he was in their care. At any rate, now he can go to job interviews and do whatever he likes. I'm guessing that he'll try his damndest to get a job before the felony conviction strikes.
At any rate, I hope that he gets everything that he so richly deserves. He's already proven what a big, big man he is by terrorizing a woman that he works with, and threatening the life of an ex-girlfriend and her children. Breaking into her house and stealing stuff is what real men do when they get dumped. Pardon me, I am afraid that if I roll my eyes any harder that they'll fall out of my skull.
Yep, Mr. Asshole, you are indeed a real man. Let's see how far your charade holds up in the big house, motherfucker.
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Normally it is not rad to act like Pat Reynolds. When dealing with the likes of Mr. Asshole though, I say don your cape, cause we're goin' to the beach!
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Yikes. Ash, I hope I didn't offend you. I know precious little about the American justice system, and even less about the prison system. Most of my knowledge has come from films like the Shawshank Redemption.
I have also heard a bunch about the prison system from a good friend of mine, Nick, is a stalwart supporter of Mumia Abu-Jamal and a vocal activist against the American prison system. In his spare time, he does volunteer prison outreach, like collecting books to donate to prison libraries. Hearing stories like Abu-Jamal's and like Asatta Shakur's is enough to cast real doubt into the (mis)handling of justice in this country.
Of course, there are violent assaults every day, but one stands out in my memory. A woman at my university was kidnapped and gang-raped by a bunch of gang members who were doing an initiation rite. Against all odds, she survived. Several of the gang-member attackers killed themselves as the police were closing in on them, but a few were captured and sent to prison.
After hearing about this case and being angry beyond words, I made a tasteless joke about giving cartons of cigarettes and toilet plungers to the prison warden, and I will never forget the look on my friend Nick's face. Grimly, and with his face drawn, he told me that several NYPD officers sodomized an African immigrant with a toilet plunger and nearly killed him. Not a funny joke at all, Somebody nice. I'm sure that the rapists (in both the university case and hopefully the NYPD case) got their comeuppance, much like Jeffrey Dahmer. However, thinking about innocent people who were crushed by the system (such as the main character in Shawshank Redemption) is just as painful as thinking about the victims that were hurt by the perpetrators.
Why am I talking about all this depressing and awful stuff? I don't really know. All I know is that we're dealing with a broken system, I feel victimized and helpless after hearing about the extent of Mr. Stalker's activities, and I don't like it at all. However, Ash is right - enough of the pity party and let's move on.
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Yep, Mr. Asshole, you are indeed a real man. Let's see how far your charade holds up in the big house, motherfucker.
That was the heart of my statement, I hope you find some solace in it while the big wheel o' justice grinds. In the meantime, be safe and aware and take the steps necessary for you, not him, to control the situation.
'Dawg: At this point I don't mind people asking, if it's done with respect and without prejudice. I did something wrong, paid for it as mandated by law, and have moved on to become a person summed up by far more than that experience through my own labor.
August: Footnotes? More like trenchent observations of Hell's (http://www.bop.gov/locations/institutions/lom/index.jsp) gaping (http://www.bop.gov/locations/institutions/ere/index.jsp) anus (http://www.bop.gov/locations/institutions/trm/index.jsp).
Jough: Long enough to understand my hate for it, short enough to not begin loving it.
Now, if y'all think this place can handle a frank discussion of the American form of incarceration, fine. Somebody fire up another thread with a question(s) and we can all take a whack at it. But no more here, my little disclosure shouldn't overshadow the fact that Linnea has a real and immediate problem.
ON THAT NOTE: Linnea? Good luck. This seems like a classic case for the 'why me?' train of though. Please spend your time on proactive means of dealing with this and above all, be ready to do what is necessary for an outcome that's favourable to you.
This makes me wonder how many other of my well adjusted and highly intelligent friends and acquaintances have spent time in the belly of the beast.