The OFFICIAL Unofficial Achewood Message Board

Achewood => Achewood => Topic started by: cellardoor on September 07, 2005, 07:54:45 am

Title: Welcome to the bloatee! - 07/09/05
Post by: cellardoor on September 07, 2005, 07:54:45 am
It's funny 'cause it's true.
I have worn a goatee before but weighing in at just under ten stone I don't think it qualifies. I did think I looked like a god-damned musketeer though.

Edit: I weigh just under ten stone, not the beard.
Title: Welcome to the bloatee! - 07/09/05
Post by: AlohaDawg on September 07, 2005, 09:28:14 am
<under> ten stone?

I wrestled 145 and once,  155 in 8th grade.

<-- would qualify for the bloatee at 13.9 stone except that I'm actually in even better shape than when I posted that stuff from that healthpass lady.

I do sport a goatee though.
Title: Welcome to the bloatee! - 07/09/05
Post by: mudokon on September 07, 2005, 09:30:04 am
Ray does something, Roast Beef says something, they argue, etc.
Title: Welcome to the bloatee! - 07/09/05
Post by: Noah on September 07, 2005, 10:19:38 am
achewood just keeps getting more and more pop culturey and sarcastic

i liked roast beef better when he was socially inept and shy and constantly depressed. now he's just kind of a witty asshole that talks funny

and ray ! he used to be pretty smart, but hopelessly naive. now he's just a silly idiot

and pat was this kind of overbearing nerd that took things waaay too seriously. now he's just an insane asshole for no reason

it's like all the characters have gone from subtle and charming to bad sitcom-ish cliches

sigh

i think achewood is still really funny but it's not all winsome and strange and endearing like it used to be. i never think about for more than five minutes after reading it

i actually thought today's strip was pretty good, 'bloatees' are embarrassing to even think about

sorry about all the adjectives
Title: Welcome to the bloatee! - 07/09/05
Post by: James on September 07, 2005, 11:19:26 am
I don't know how anyone could be mad a strip containing the line "that thing is so hell of wispy a spider covets".
Title: Welcome to the bloatee! - 07/09/05
Post by: MattFish on September 07, 2005, 12:05:40 pm
I haven't been around long enough to know whether I agree with Noah totally or not but I do spend much less time enjoying the strip than I used to.

That said I do love OH HOW THE PEOPLE WILL MARCH! There's a funny mental image there somewhere.

I also hate goatees. Goatees are what happens when people forget to shave for a couple days and someone calls them on it. You lie and then you have to follow through.
Title: Welcome to the bloatee! - 07/09/05
Post by: wombat on September 07, 2005, 12:59:14 pm
Quote from: "mudokon"
Ray does something, Roast Beef says something, they argue, etc.


You have a problem with this?
Title: Welcome to the bloatee! - 07/09/05
Post by: CortJstr on September 07, 2005, 01:15:25 pm
So did anybody else have to put "10 stone" into the Google calculator to find out how much that weighs?
Title: Welcome to the bloatee! - 07/09/05
Post by: cellardoor on September 07, 2005, 01:29:01 pm
It's the equivalent of one small American child.
Basically, I ain't a dude of gravity.
Title: Welcome to the bloatee! - 07/09/05
Post by: sjlimmer on September 07, 2005, 02:05:18 pm
As a man of gravity, I stand by my bloatee.  But then, as previously mentioned, I'm all about the hair (http://achewood.plagiarist.com/viewtopic.php?p=38640#38640)

Beefs spider comment really made this one for me.
Title: Welcome to the bloatee! - 07/09/05
Post by: Golfhaus on September 07, 2005, 02:20:05 pm
I sent "bloatee" to urbandictionary - I'm currently awaiting the completion of their review process. I'll post the link here once that's complete.
Title: Welcome to the bloatee! - 07/09/05
Post by: Beatrice on September 07, 2005, 02:22:30 pm
Quote from: "CortJstr"
So did anybody else have to put "10 stone" into the Google calculator to find out how much that weighs?


Yes.  What the hell, people.
Title: Welcome to the bloatee! - 07/09/05
Post by: cellardoor on September 07, 2005, 03:03:17 pm
People outside of the US have quaint and beguiling customs.
Catch up!
(FYI, one "stone" is fourteen "pounds". Although a pound is also a unit of currency that can be also called a "quid". Thanks).
Title: Welcome to the bloatee! - 07/09/05
Post by: AugustWest on September 07, 2005, 03:16:13 pm
Quote from: "sjlimmer"
As a man of gravity, I stand by my bloatee.  


Me too.  18.5 stone, baybee!
Title: Welcome to the bloatee! - 07/09/05
Post by: MSC on September 07, 2005, 03:53:43 pm
Quote from: "Mattgiraffe"
I do spend much less time enjoying the strip than I used to.


Now, now.  The bloatee is a phenomenon that needed to be recognized, and also dealt with.  Thank you to Onstad for picking up on this.  And it's a clever term, to boot.  

Plus: "the gossamer bloatee"  that is brilliant.

Finally, the bickering between Roast Beef and Ray is very charming and also revealing.  It's just about the only time that Beef shows cojones and can speak frankly.  He is so comfortable with Ray that he can rip on him, even though he is cowed by much of the rest of the world.

High marks all around.
Title: Welcome to the bloatee! - 07/09/05
Post by: CortJstr on September 07, 2005, 04:07:11 pm
I remember George Carlin bitching about improperly trimmed beards on guys with fat necks but this is the first I've encountered the concept with goatees.

And for some reason I almost typed ghoti but I know that's giraffe.
Title: Welcome to the bloatee! - 07/09/05
Post by: V-Adore on September 07, 2005, 04:09:29 pm
Quote from: "MSC"
Finally, the bickering between Roast Beef and Ray is very charming and also revealing.  It's just about the only time that Beef shows cojones and can speak frankly.  He is so comfortable with Ray that he can rip on him, even though he is cowed by much of the rest of the world.

I was just about to post this. I find it the most interesting part of their dynamic, really -- that Beef is comfortable criticizing Ray's habits despite being cowed by the rest of the world, and that Ray tolerates Beef doing it despite his lack of tolerance for such things from other friends (like, say, Pat). It's interesting.

I have not observed that many bloatees, but I go to a hopelessly preppy college where there are not many dudes of gravity. I suspect once I get to grad school I will be able to observe this phenomenon in greater detail.
Title: Welcome to the bloatee! - 07/09/05
Post by: Carlos del Vaca on September 07, 2005, 04:12:50 pm
http://archive.salon.com/comics/boll/2001/07/12/boll/story.gif
Title: Welcome to the bloatee! - 07/09/05
Post by: Golfhaus on September 07, 2005, 04:26:54 pm
Quote from: "V-Adore"
I find it the most interesting part of their dynamic, really -- that Beef is comfortable criticizing Ray's habits despite being cowed by the rest of the world, and that Ray tolerates Beef doing it despite his lack of tolerance for such things from other friends (like, say, Pat). It's interesting.


I've often said that you can tell how good a friend you are to someone by how much abuse you can heap on them with them just taking it. My best friend and I referred to each other as "fucker" and "bitch" for a long time. Also, it shows that Beef considers himself one of a few people who can tell it to Ray like it is - it takes a true friend to point out when you're doing something stupid to your face. Others will just talk shit about you to your mutual friends.
Title: Welcome to the bloatee! - 07/09/05
Post by: MSC on September 07, 2005, 08:29:15 pm
Quote from: "carlosdelvaca"
http://archive.salon.com/comics/boll/2001/07/12/boll/story.gif


Exactly. (http://i.cnn.net/cnn/2002/SHOWBIZ/Movies/04/19/ew.hot.star.wars/vert.lucas.jpg)
Title: Welcome to the bloatee! - 07/09/05
Post by: antioch on September 08, 2005, 04:31:29 am
Why is this making Beef so angry? Last panel, looks like he's going to throw down his pamphlet or whatever and storm out!
I wish "cauliflower ass" wasn't floating around in my head. Danged Onstad. Reading Achewood has its price.
Title: Welcome to the bloatee! - 07/09/05
Post by: AlohaDawg on September 08, 2005, 06:36:07 am
Cauliflower ass sounds like cellulite....do dudes get cellulite?
Title: Welcome to the bloatee! - 07/09/05
Post by: AlohaDawg on September 08, 2005, 05:52:11 pm
See, I was first thinking cauliflower ass was like cauliflower ear - like a subdural hematoma of the ass, from trauma.

Gave a whole new meaning to getting cauliflower ass from three musketeers (although it's more frightening to picture three penisketeers)
(down cubby! down!)
Title: Welcome to the bloatee! - 07/09/05
Post by: JordanB on September 09, 2005, 01:14:57 am
This strip reminded me a lot of another, funnier one:

http://www.achewood.com/index.php?date=11012004

Were it not for the line: "Dogg I cannot brook the gossamer bloatee" this strip would not have lived up to the one just linked to.

Also note that Ray is persuaded by Téodor, but not by Beef.
Title: Welcome to the bloatee! - 07/09/05
Post by: pmcd9 on September 09, 2005, 01:36:16 am
Dammit, I hate it when someone post a link to a former strip that points out how recent strips suck by comparison.

Not really, but damn, that similar strip from a year ago is way funnier than today's strip.

~Paul