The OFFICIAL Unofficial Achewood Message Board
Trivial Pursuits => Arts & Entertainment => Topic started by: Choop on October 26, 2005, 04:35:06 am
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What are some movies you hate?
I mean, really, viscerally respond to in such a strong manner that you walk out of the theater, or stop the DVD, or whatever, but that you vow never to watch or even attempt to watch, ever again? What movies have garnered such strong reaction from this Achehead crowd?
Movies that you avoided don't count: you disliked the idea, you were disgusted by the premise, you were repulsed by the cast; no matter, you can't hate the film without experiencing it.
Not Without My Daughter - I couldn't even finish it, even though I had been told that it finishes happily enough.
A.I. - I can't help but feel that Spielberg destroyed by distortion the original project envisioned by Kubrick.
Spanking the Monkey - Admittedly, I walked into it without the slightest idea of the topic. Gave me nightmares for weeks, and still haunts me.
(Inspired by the Prussian Blue thread)
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E.T. is what jumps immediately to mind.
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Matrix Revolutions. What a bloated piece of shit. By the time the 7 minute rave was over, I knew that I could never hate another movie more. I think the thing that really makes me hate it was that my friends all walked out loving it and told me that I didn't get it. There is NOTHING to fuck*ng get.
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I remain viscerally repulsed by big chunks of Peter Jackson's Lord of the Rings films -- particularly Gollum, who I fin awkward and inappropriate and... ew, just ew, jesus, what.
Also, The Bicycle Thief made me want to kill myself, and not in a cathartic way.
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There are a few films that I absolutely deplore:
Beverly Hills Cop 3
Speed 2: Cruise Control
Rocky V
Stop, or my Mother Will Shoot!
Mr. Deeds (I do sorta like some Adam Sandler movies, though)
Star Trek: Nemesis
Note that most of them are ill-conceived sequels.
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Meet the Parents.
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Oh, dude, Meet the Parents was fuck*ng cinematic GOLD compared to its sequel, "Meet the Fockers" which landed with a bigger thud than Jim O'Brien did.
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Oh, dude, Meet the Parents was fuck*ng cinematic GOLD compared to its sequel, "Meet the Fockers" which landed with a bigger thud than Jim O'Brien did.
Oh, my God. Meet the Fockers sucked SOUR FROG ASS. We saw it last year as a family Christmas outing because there were no other movies available -- my omens of terribleness totally ignored. Ignored, I tell you!
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Something About Mary
Sofa King We Todd Ed..
I don't walk out of movies much but that one I did. It's not that I mind "gross" humor, I just like it; you know, funny.
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Meet the Parents.
Word up. Word straight up.
I hate The Mirror Has Two Faces.
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My dad started watching American Pie on TV while I was in the room on the computer one day. I had to put on headphones. Every time I mention this people react with massive disbelief. Kind of like in HS when I said, "Pulp Fiction was OK" and was ostracized for the next couple weeks.
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Meet the Parents.
Word up. Word straight up.
Me three. I found this movie painful, not funny.
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What About Bob?
I can't believe I watched as much of that as I did, but in the end I had to turn it off, or I'd have punched the TV.
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What About Bob?
I can't believe I watched as much of that as I did, but in the end I had to turn it off, or I'd have punched the TV.
I have a love/hate relationship with Bill Murray. The guy plays the exact same character in every movie, it just depends on if he's Wild and Crazy Early Bill, or More Demure Thoughtfully Funny Bill.
And I'm with you all on the Meet the Parents front and the American Pie front. (Even if I think Alyson Hannigan is 10 kinds of hot on a stick.. gah, why can't she be in anything me likes?! )
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Speaking of Bill Murray - Lost in Translation. And I was positive I could at least tolerate any movie set in Japan.
Also recently that movie about the guys who are obsessed with wine and a title that made no sense - Sideways, or something like that?
I guess there's a theme here about my lack of tolerance for the fantasies of late middle aged movie-making males.
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I can remember having walked out of the theatre for three movies:
1. You've Got Mail
2. The Passion of the Christ
3. Whatever Emir Kusturica's last movie was. I was a little surprised at seeing something so bad I had to leave even a pretentious indie cinema.
Other movies that make me angry to think about are the Lord of the Rings movies and the Star Wars prequels. And, I mean, I loathe the Lord of the Rings books, and I'm entirely indifferent to the original Star Wars trilogy, so it's not any kind of purist thing, just the thing where I think they are hell of lame.
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Hmm.
There is a very funny Roger Ebert book I recommend called "I Hated. Hated, Hated this Movie". It's a collection his funniest bad reviews of horrible movies and it's pretty funny.
I personally hated:
Last Man Standing (almost walked out on that one)
The Cook the Thief his Wife and her Lover (Egad)
Fantastic Four had massive suckitude IMHO
I'm finding that I have a limited amount of patience for Bruce Willis in general and by the end of a movie where he is the central character I want him dead whether he's the good guy or not.
If Choop doesn't mind, I'd like to posit the converse question: What movie/s did you expect to suck so bad and they were actually pretty good?
My vote: Love Actually. I figured it for a chick film but it was well written and paced and came together nicely (happy ending for Colin notwithstanding - that made no sense but was good fantasy fodder)
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Meet the Parents.
Pretty much everything Ben Stiller has ever been in for me. Except the Royal Tennebaums. That's the only exception. I hate Ben Stiller.
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Meet the Parents.
Pretty much everything Ben Stiller has ever been in for me. Except the Royal Tennebaums. That's the only exception. I hate Ben Stiller.
I thought Dodgeball was funny. Especially the alternate ending.
If Choop doesn't mind, I'd like to posit the converse question: What movie/s did you expect to suck so bad and they were actually pretty good?
Fight Club. Based on the commercials I thought it was going to be like Bloodsport
Oh, and Mallrats. I thought it would suck because they profiled it on Entertainment Tonight and that show only discusses shit.
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Speaking of Bill Murray - Lost in Translation. And I was positive I could at least tolerate any movie set in Japan.
I take it, then, that you actually saw it? If so I respect that opinion (although I disagree with it). I had a conversation about Lost in Translation with someone who hated it sight unseen, because she thought it was all "old guy scores with a hot young chick." And it's not like that.
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I take it, then, that you actually saw it? If so I respect that opinion (although I disagree with it). I had a conversation about Lost in Translation with someone who hated it sight unseen, because she thought it was all "old guy scores with a hot young chick." And it's not like that.
not that there's anything wrong what that.
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I had a conversation about Lost in Translation with someone who hated it sight unseen, because she thought it was all "old guy scores with a hot young chick." And it's not like that.
Yeah cause if you're looking for that I have some vids on my computer you can have... er.. wait.
I had the same reaction to Fight Club but for different reasons: in such as I hate Chuck P.'s writing. Form-u-lay-ick!
Turns out his writing makes a better movie than a book, who knew?
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Lost in Translation was made by Sophia Coppola, who is neither male nor middle-aged.
LiT and Sideways are, however, two of the best films I've seen in the past couple years.
Here's another couple that I hated, when reminded of bad Bruce Willis movies:
The Whole Ten Yards
Unbreakable (I liked it better when it was called "The Dead Zone")
Movies that I thought I'd hate but really enjoyed?
Love, Actually would be on that list. I actually bought it without ever having heard of it before at Walmart because it was dirt cheap ($5.50 bin) and because two pretty hot MILFs were swooning over it and I figured it was something I could watch with the gf at the time who pretty much liked nothing but romantic comedies.
Fight Club looked really awful in the trailers, but once I saw that it was directed by Fincher I went opening night. I'm pretty much on board for anything the guy does. He has never made a bad movie (Alien3 and Panic Room weren't masterpieces, but they were entertaining enough).
Kingpin was one that really surprised me. I was dragged to that one, but figured Bill Murray was in it, so at least it would have that. I've never laughed so much at a movie, at least not since A giraffe Called Wanda. Kingpin is still the funniest movie I've seen since then, and that's going on ten years now that I haven't seen a funnier movie.
Dumb & Dumber is a pretty accurate description of the progression of that film's arc.
I know that even fanboys like to rag on the Star Wars prequel trilogy, but I enjoyed it, and was happy that each one got better. I think Attack of the Clones was probably one of my most-replayed DVDs. I can still pretty much put it on anytime and enjoy it just as much as I would the original trilogy.
Actually, in order I think I liked:
Empire Strikes Back
Star Wars
Revenge of the Sith
Attack of the Clones
Return of the Jedi
The Phantom Menace
But I still saw Phantom Menace at the theatre four times. And I was excited to have *some/any* Star Wars on DVD when it came out.
And yes, I fast-forward through the parts I don't like and that has kept the movie much fonder in my memory.
Oh, Alien Resurrection is one of my most hated films. I was in a perpetual state of WTF? while watching that one at the movies.
1941 was one of the worst movies I've ever seen, and especially disappointing considering the talent involved.
The new Dukes of Hazzard movie was beyond awful.
I just saw "The Faculty" for the first time last night and couldn't believe it was made by the same people who made Desperado and Sin City, and Scream. WTF? Awful!
The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy movie probably killed H2G2 for more people than it helped convert to reading the books. Who would've thought it would make the BBC series look better by comparison?
Gus Van Sant's latest, Last Days, was probably the dullest film I've ever seen.
A Love Song for Bobby Long couldn't even be saved by Scarlett Johanssen's luscious lips.
National Treasure was probably the dumbest movie of 2004.
Zoolander was a waste of time (okay, there were one or two funny parts, but c'mon, three funny jokes does not a film make).
Saw wanted so very badly to be Se7en.
The Skeleton Key was full of hoodoo.
I've kept a list of all of the movies I've seen since 2003, and have rated them for myself. Those are all of the one and one-and-a-half star movies I've seen lately.
I was actually surprised by how well The Village held up. Even the "surprise," which was pretty obvious, was handled so well that it didn't seem like the POINT of the film was the surprise, unlike The Sixth Sense which holds up well only on two viewings - one where you don't know the ending and then once again once you do. After that you start to notice things you're not supposed to notice, like how shallow and weak it is.
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i still think of SwimFan as the worst movie i've ever seen, if only because i have a bad memory, and keep forgetting the others. It made me uncomfortable to watch, and the only reason i didn't stop watching it was because of who i was watching it with.
Alone in the Dark made me angry, because i thought it could, maybe, have been, while not good, at the very least a fun/scary scifi/fantasy horror type thing. it made me so angry, in fact, that for SEVERAL DAYS i talked, at length, about how much i did not like the movie and that i had HALF A MIND to go and DEMAND my money back from the rental agency. obviously i did not demand my money back, and now that i'm no longer angry, i don't even have half a mind anymore.
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Lost in Translation was made by Sophia Coppola, who is neither male nor middle-aged.
Yes, I know. Mysterious. I can only assume it is due to having been raised by wolves - er, moviemakers - instead of having had a normal life.
Carlos - yes, I did see it. Every infuriating minute. I'm sure I can also name movies that I didn't see because I hated the mere idea (um, maybe most movies, actually, being not a big fan of movies in the first place) but unfortunately this one I actually saw.
Is Unbreakable the Bruce Willis movie where he's some kind of weird superhero? I, um, liked that one. Now that I look back on it, I am surprised. But I am a sucker for that concept - take something mythical (werewolves, zombies, etc) and see what it would be like if one really lived in your neighborhood today.
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I saw this one Jarmusch movie that made me forever hate all Jarmusch movies (Mystery Train was tolerable) and I keep trying to give Jarmusch more chances, ( I want to see Broken Flowers) but everything I've seen of his was overly cinematic (if that makes sense) and heavy handed with the symbology.
I really hated Ghost Dog and I really really hated the one with the people that drive from NY to Cleveland and then to Florida, mostly in black and white, with 20 minutes of dialog and 90 minutes of stuff going by as they drive. (had to look it up. Stranger Than Paradise.)
I'm sure it was very artisitic and no doubt some critics peed a little they thought it was so good but I thought it pretty much sucked. Still looking forward to Broken Flowers though.
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Frank confession: I still have an irrational hatred of Se7en. I guess it's well-made for what it is, but... it's both stupid and reprehensible. I have sort of resigned myself to being the only person in the universe who feels this way, though.
As for surprisingly-good movies: I recall Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back being a pleasant surprise. So was National Treasure, in the sense that it was surprisingly enjoyable despite being an aggressively stupid film. I watched it with friends and enjoyed myself, and that's more than I can say for, say, The Bicycle Thief.
On the "outright schlock" front, the SO has almost managed to convince me that Manos: Hands of Fate is underrated. But you know what was so horrible that it wasn't even funny? Night of the Lepus. Not even enjoyable as schlock. Just wretched.
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The third school of thought: movies you hated, movies you thought you would hate but loved, and movies SO BAD you love them.
I nominate "They Live" starring Rowdy Roddy Piper, Killer Klowns from Outer Space, Don't Tell Mom the Babysitter's Dead, and Count Yorga the Vampire (Vampire + Hippies = hilarity)
Also I love Silly Black Exploitation films as a genre. Come Back Charleston Blue, Cotton Comes to Harlem, and any of the the three Cosby/Poitier movies are always good.
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I will freely admit to a sick fondness for Hell Comes to Frogtown. It's just... too silly to hate. The sequel is also good for this.
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I saw this one Jarmusch movie that made me forever hate all Jarmusch movies (Mystery Train was tolerable) and I keep trying to give Jarmusch more chances, ( I want to see Broken Flowers) but everything I've seen of his was overly cinematic (if that makes sense) and heavy handed with the symbology.
I really hated Ghost Dog and I really really hated the one with the people that drive from NY to Cleveland and then to Florida, mostly in black and white, with 20 minutes of dialog and 90 minutes of stuff going by as they drive. (had to look it up. Stranger Than Paradise.)
I'm sure it was very artisitic and no doubt some critics peed a little they thought it was so good but I thought it pretty much sucked. Still looking forward to Broken Flowers though.
Ooh! Ooh! Watch Down By Law! This is very important. Tom Waits and Roberto Begnini escaping prison into the bayou? You had better believe antics ensue. I've not seen many of Jarmusch's films (just this and Coffee and Cigarettes, I think), but I like this one a lot. It is cinematic- shot in black and white and whatnot, but not, I found, intrusively. It's still a fun movie to watch, you do not have to just Appreciate it.
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Movies I walked out of:
Angel Eyes J-Lo? Jim Caviezel before he was Jesus? Hell no! - I couldn't stop laughing and had to leave the theatre.
Moulin Rouge! -at the point where all the dandies walking into the club started singing Smells Like Teen Spirit I started yelling and force my friend to leave with me.
White Chicks/The Hot Chick - I can't remember which of these I fell asleep in and which I walked out of, but I did either with each.
Movies I should have walked out of:
Stuck on You - since it was for free, my SO and I both agreed to watch it. At one point, before seeing it, we both said someting along the lines of: "we might laugh once or twice at least - it can't be that bad" But no. It was. We did not.
A.I. - if only I left when the kid got frozen in the ice, I could have told myself it was an alright movie.
Solaris - so many people walked out of this movie while we watched it that my SO and I decided to stick it out just for laughs. When it was over only us and one other couple were in the theatre, and the other couple just turned to us and we all started laughing. It was soooooooo bad. Bad.
The Island - again, another freebie my SO won tickets to. Wait a minute, I've already seen Logans Run, and I've read A Brave New World, so why am I watching this movie?
Movies that deeply dispointed me:
Sin City - style without substance? Fuck you.
Big giraffe -come on Tim Burton, you can go better than this!
Million Dollar Baby - Not all that bad but **[spoiler alert]** if I wanted to see a movie about euthanasia, I would have gone to see a movie about euthanasia.
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You just reminded me to two more I HATE
Blue Steel with Jamie Lee Curtis. It left a mark on my soul that won't come clean.
Enough starring Jenny-from-the-block. I would have beat her ass if I were the director. Then I would have beat her agent's ass.
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I thought Million Dollar Baby was waaaaaaaaaaaay overrated, but it wasn't crap. Come now, Smells.
Big giraffe I found entertaining, but not necessarily something I'd watch again.
Moulin Rouge was awesome. I guess you are too jaded to enjoy things.
AI was horribly underrated. Yes, I could have done without the last 20 minutes and spindly aliens too.
Did someone fuck*ng say E.T. earlier? What the fuck is not to like about E. fuck*ng T.?
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Did someone fuck*ng say E.T. earlier? What the fuck is not to like about E. fuck*ng T.?
Because E. Foucalt*ng T. is treacly as Foucalt.
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Speaking of "say it ain't so, Tim Burton," howzabout his remake of Planet of the Apes? His crappy remake? Yeah.
Oh, SHIT, and that reminds me, the king of all Movies I Hate: the most recent Island of Dr. Moreau, with Brando phonin' in Moreau. I saw this movie when I was a young nough child to still think movies were a miracle, and this movie singlehandedly convinced me that movies could also be terrible, terrible pieces of shit. Now that's powerful.
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Movies I hated: La Vita e Bella/Life Is Beautiful. So corny, so obnoxious, so dumb. Even the Third Reich couldn't save it.
The Butterfly Effect. I waver between placing this in "hated", because it's so stupid, and "so bad it's good", because I couldn't stop laughing at the many ridiculously bad fates of Ashton Kutcher. I mean, Kutcher as a multiple-amputee drowning himself in the bathtub? Comedy gold. But, no, overall, it's just crap.
Spielberg's War Of The Worlds. I was with it early on, I really was. The sounds those tripods made? Terrifying. The gritty, realistic way he shot it? Excellent. Tom Cruise? He may be a looney tune in real life, but he is a good enough actor that you can forget that for a couple of hours. But little holes kept popping up--Tom's the only one in the world that can figure out how to get a car started again? They fall from the bottom of the tripod in that cage, all the way to the ground, and don't break every bone in their body? Not to mention Tim Robbins' lame character in a segment of the film that went on way too long. But it's the ending that breaks the camel's back--when Tom's son shows up alive and well. Tom's son who was SWALLOWED UP IN A GIANT BALL OF FIRE. So fuck you for that, Spielberg. Munich better be awesome or my love-hate relationship with your work will seriously start favoring the latter.
Speaking of that, I too hate E.T.. And Close Encounters of the Third Kind, which was just amazingly dull.
One "so good it's bad" I could name is Super Mario Bros.: The Movie. It's my favorite video game movie just on the grounds of how bizarre it is. The games are so surreal and plotless--how ARE you supposed to make a movie out of that, anyway?
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One "so good it's bad" I could name is Super Mario Bros.: The Movie. It's my favorite video game movie just on the grounds of how bizarre it is. The games are so surreal and plotless--how ARE you supposed to make a movie out of that, anyway?
You know what video game needs to be made into a movie? Oregon Trail. With Hiram the Blacksmith. I'd say you could make it as a run of the mill porno and turn out a decent product but personally, I think Hentai is the way to go with this one.
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I said E.T. Jough, I and stand behind it, beeyotch!
Why do I hate ET? As previously mentioned, it's so sucrose ridden it ought to carry a warning for diabetics. And it's so blatantly, obviously, insultingly manipulative.
Feh.
I'll second National Treasure. Saw it with my family. They liked it. I H.A.T.E.D. it. Made fun of it throughout. Predicted what was going to happen hours before it occurred. It was like they opened the big box of cliches and dumped the whole fuck*ng thing in. I mean I winced at the very beginning when I saw that there was a billionaire with a German accent. I thought, surely they wouldn't make him the villian. That was overdone by about, say, 1919. It's so over the top that even Austin Powers doesn't do it anymore. But no, accented billionaire guy is the bad guy.
I think I slapped myself on the forehead in disbelief so many times during that movie that I have permanent fingerprints embedded in my hairline.
As for Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back, I liked it. I expected to like it and I did. I like Kevin Smith and I like goofy sophomoric comedy movies. I like Jay and Silent Bob. Sure it's full of in-jokes and self-referential humor, but I like that too. I laughed my ass off. Snooogins.
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My favorite So Bad It's Good is motherfuck*ng Roadhouse starring Patrick Swayze. There is not a single frame of that movie that isn't awesome.
Honorable Mention: Rocky 4: The scene right before Apollo dies when he's dancing around with James Brown to "Living in America" is one of my favorite movie scenes ever. EVER.
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I hated A.I. The misanthropy of Kubrick and the saccharine of Spielberg, mooshed together into a cinematic Reese's cup of awful. Though, oddly enough, I liked the ending after the first ending, but before the third, where we meet the liquid *****s during the Ice Age. That was cool.
I hated Attack of the Clones. There's one moment in that movie that feels like Star Wars, and the rest...eeeeurgh.
Unbreakable made me want to die and stop living. The worst superhero movie imaginable.
A friend dragged me to see the 1995 Christopher Lambert - John Lone vehicle The Hunted. "Come on, Jim, it's a Ninja vs. samurai movie. You should be all over it."
The first half-hour was, well, a Ninja vs. samurai movie. And then it just started gathering momentum, and by the time the Ninjas and the samurai finally faced off against each other about 45 minutes in, I was hooked. The rest of the movie was hit or miss, but I wasn't expecting to like it as much as I did.
So bad it's fuck*ng genius: Rudy Ray Moore's The Human Tornado, which starts off ridiculous ( the Instant Replay ) and just goes batshit-crazy from there. Every time I watch that movie, afterwards I want to go out and fight crime.
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Two movies that I am deeply embarassed to admit I liked:
Bubble Boy
and
Ringmaster
(that's right - the Jerry Springer movie)
Since we have a chain of what we call "cheap seat" movie theatres here that have 8 + theatres each playing second run movies and used to charge $1.50 a ticket, and because this theatre was directly in line with our route home from where we worked, my friend and I used to hit that theatre at least once a week and see anything - and I mean anything - it didn't matter how bad it was, it was cheaper than renting and it was actually a really nice theatre. At some point we ended up in Bubble Boy, and to this day, I still have no idea why, but the theatre was practically sold out. We were lucky to get two seats together. Any movie is funny if you're surrounded by other people open to laughing, and for whatever reason, it was a laugh riot - the whole theatre roared. We laughed so hard. As we moved from the theatre into the parking lot, we were silent. Finally, I broke the silence: "so, um, I kind of... liked that.." him: "me too." "So we... we both... liked Bubble Boy?" "Yes, we did." "Oh." "Yeah." "Let us never speak of this again."
Some characters from Bubble Boy, as pulled from imdb:
Jake Gyllenhaal.... Jimmy Livingston
Swoosie Kurtz .... Mrs. Livingston
Marley Shelton .... Chloe
Danny Trejo .... Slim
John Carroll Lynch .... Mr. Livingston
Verne Troyer .... Dr. Phreak
Dave Sheridan .... Mark
Brian George .... Pushpop
Patrick Cranshaw .... Pappy/Pippy
Stephen Spinella .... Chicken Man
Ever Carradine .... Lisa, Mark's Sister
Geoffrey Arend .... Flipper Boy
Beetlejuice .... Li'l Zip
Matthew McGrory .... Human Sasquatch
Bonnie Morgan .... Rubber Woman
Jason Sklar .... Shlomo
etc.
I don't remember anything about this movie really other than that we laughed and then were filled with shame. Looking back, all either of us can remember is that we weren't high, and that the theatre was full.
When it comes to the Jerry Springer movie - same friend, different theatre. I had gotten free passes to some movie through work - neither of us can remember which movie. We arrived at the theatre and were apologized to, somehow the reel for the movie we were to see hadn't been delivered or something. I can't remember the situation. We were told that we could go ahead and "sneak in" to see the Jerry Springer movie, even though it had already started, since they had been unable to sell any actual tickets to the movie. We looked at each other, and couldn't pass up the opportunity to see such unmitigated crap, especially for free, so in we went. The other two people in the theatre, also admitted for free, turned as we entered and snickered to themselves. We sat a couple rows away from them. My friend then realized he needed popcorn, so I was left alone in a theatre with two other people, watching the Jerry Springer movie. Finally, my friend returns with popcorn, and starts loudly whispering "Mel? Mel? Where are you?! Mel?!" The other people in the theatre and I were quite amused at this act. He sat, I started eating his popcorn, then started throwing it at the people in front of us, who started throwing some back at us. It was just so much fun. I don't really remember the movie itself. Something about a hillbilly girl and her mother in love witht he same boy who go on Jerry to sort out their troubles I think. But it was just such a wonderful moment.
Oh! Oh! Another movie I hated was In the Bedroom. WTF, people? I mean WTF? Sooooo boring. I just didn't get why it was so highly acclaimed.
Oh, and Jough, I definitly am jaded when it comes to any god damn musical. We saw Moulin Rouge on its opening night, and I didn't know it was a musical - I thought it was one of those movies with lots in incidental music, not an actual musical, otherwise I wouldn't have gone at all. Boo to musicals. Except The Rocky Horror Picture show and maybe Dancer in the Dark - even though I had my genius friend practically go through that movie scene by scene and tear it apart, I still sort of like it.
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My favorite So Bad It's Good is motherfuck*ng Roadhouse starring Patrick Swayze. There is not a single frame of that movie that isn't awesome.
Ahh, remember this (http://achewood.plagiarist.com/viewtopic.php?t=1724&highlight=roadhouse)? Meeemorieees!
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My favorite So Bad It's Good is motherfuck*ng Roadhouse starring Patrick Swayze. There is not a single frame of that movie that isn't awesome.
Ahh, remember this (http://achewood.plagiarist.com/viewtopic.php?t=1724&highlight=roadhouse)? Meeemorieees!
I didn't! Man, that was a long time ago (for me).
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My favorite So Bad It's Good is motherfuck*ng Roadhouse starring Patrick Swayze. There is not a single frame of that movie that isn't awesome.
Ahh, remember this (http://achewood.plagiarist.com/viewtopic.php?t=1724&highlight=roadhouse)? Meeemorieees!
Good news, (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0469965/?fr=c2l0ZT1kZnx0dD0xfGZiPXV8cG49MHxrdz0xfHE9cm9hZGhvdXN8ZnQ9MXxteD0yMHxsbT01MDB8Y289MXxodG1sPTF8bm09MQ__;fc=13;ft=22;fm=1) guys.
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My favorite So Bad It's Good is motherfuck*ng Roadhouse starring Patrick Swayze. There is not a single frame of that movie that isn't awesome.
Ahh, remember this (http://achewood.plagiarist.com/viewtopic.php?t=1724&highlight=roadhouse)? Meeemorieees!
Good news, (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0469965/?fr=c2l0ZT1kZnx0dD0xfGZiPXV8cG49MHxrdz0xfHE9cm9hZGhvdXN8ZnQ9MXxteD0yMHxsbT01MDB8Y289MXxodG1sPTF8bm09MQ__;fc=13;ft=22;fm=1) guys.
Hey, scroll down on the link and check out the message board topic titles:
Better Tag Lines For This Diaper Taco Of A Movie
Beautiful.
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Hey, scroll down on the link and check out the message board topic titles:
Better Tag Lines For This Diaper Taco Of A Movie
Beautiful.
Road House II: Floppy Breasts and Milwaukee's Best
RH2: Cybernetic Klansmen from the Future
Road House 2: No, seriously
Road House2: Oxycotin-Meth Superdrughouse and Bait Shoppe
Road House 2: Boat House
Fuck Snakes on a Plane, this long awaited sequel to Road House is the movie to see in '06.
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Let me tell you about a bad movie. This bad movie is called What Dreams May Come. In this movie, Cuba Gooding Jr. helps Robin Williams rescue his wife from hell. The movie mistakes lavish (yet cliche) set pieces for emotional resonance, and psychobabble for dialogue. There is no coherent plot. The acting was wincingly bad, like I had to avert my eyes from the screen, but I can't tell if that was the director's fault, or the actors' fault, or just the fact that the screenplay was so goddamn terrible. Worst of all, I saw it with a bunch of people who thought it was brilliant so I had to pretend it had some redeeming features. "It was ... good," I said. "Very colorful! Robin Williams was ... a ... famous person!"
Oh yeah, and Robin Williams plays himself as a 20-year-old youth in a flashback. I have elaborate machinery for suspending my disbelief - pulleys, reinforced rope, etc. - but that shit was unhoistable.
Regarding movies that I expected to hate but actually liked: In Her Shoes. I was sure it was going to be trash after seeing the trailer, but it turned out to be a skillfully-made, well-written movie. Never schmaltzy, never over-the-top. Unlike other chick flicks it actually earned its emotional impact. This has been movie minute with aparrish.
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I have very few movies I absolutely hate, I can come to terms with most movies on some level but I will throw out a couple that left me seriously freaked out by the end of them:
Tape - It's got Uma Thurman and Ethan Hawke in it, I only mention this because I didn't notice it hit the movies over here so I don't know how noticable it was over there, but I caught it on dvd and it was just all dialogue but so freaking tense. Not sure how it would stand up to re-watching, but I enjoyed it my first time through.
Mysterious skin - I got dragged along to this one at an indie theatre near me and just can't decide whether it's actually a powerful movie or just exploitative. I went to see it with two people who just talk all through movies though and we didn't say a goddamn word to each other until 5 minutes after we left the theatre.
Oh and Sin City was the bizzledybomb as was Big giraffe, but then I've got a soft spot for old time storytelling (even if it's not burton's best). Kung fu Hustle was a bunch of fun too if you're into that sort of thing.
Anyone seen mirrormask?
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Oh, dude, Meet the Parents was fuck*ng cinematic GOLD compared to its sequel, "Meet the Fockers" which landed with a bigger thud than Jim O'Brien did.
Oh, my God. Meet the Fockers sucked SOUR FROG ASS. We saw it last year as a family Christmas outing because there were no other movies available -- my omens of terribleness totally ignored. Ignored, I tell you!
mine too! are... we... related?!?
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Oh, dude, Meet the Parents was fuck*ng cinematic GOLD compared to its sequel, "Meet the Fockers" which landed with a bigger thud than Jim O'Brien did.
Oh, my God. Meet the Fockers sucked SOUR FROG ASS. We saw it last year as a family Christmas outing because there were no other movies available -- my omens of terribleness totally ignored. Ignored, I tell you!
mine too! are... we... related?!?
Well, you sure don't type like my mom...
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You guys sure watch a lot of movies. I've watched approximately three movies since 2000. I don't have a good enough sample set to start ranking.
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Yeah, Mirror Mask, anyone? Should I waste my money on it?
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Oh, man, movies I hate, I hate so many movies, I should just let it go but I can't. When some of them get praised, which is not uncommon, I hate them all the more.
Batman Begins. I read somewhere some dude saying it was "neorealistic". I gave this really weird loud nervous laugh in the office.
Con Air. But then again everybody hates it.
The Star Wars movies. Requiem for a Dream.
A History of Violence. Stay with me here people, A History of Violence was like a really loud fart during the burial of the king's son.
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Batman Begins was very true to the "Dark Knight" reinvention of Batman in the 80s and early 90s. It's the first Batman movie to "get it right."
However, if you don't like Batman, or superhero movies, then yeah, maybe you should've taken a pass on that one.
You don't like any of the Star Wars films, not even the original one? If so, pretty much any opinion you have hereafter is suspect. The first Star Wars, and even more so the Empire Strikes Back, are basically like treasure. Do you lack whimsy in your soul?
Requiem for a Dream is not an easy movie to love, but it's really well made and when I heard someone describe it as "harrowing" I had to nod in agreement.
Con Air is a stupid movie by design. To say you hate it is like saying that you like to breathe air. No shit.
A History of Violence was pretty good, if not entirely unpredictable (read: mostly predictable). However, the characters were fairly well drawn-out and who among us doesn't like to see William Hurt take a bullet to the head? I ask you!
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Man, was that the fuck*ng wrong foot or *what*? =)
But basically, yeah, I'm just grumpy and I hate a *lot* of movies. What about "Unbreakable", what do you think of "Unbreakable" as a super-hero movie?
(You have me on the "bullet in William Hurt's brain" scenario, though; that was a very nice scene to watch... ^^)
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I think I mentioned how much Unbreakable sucked earlier in this thread.
WAY TO READ THE THREADS TO WHICH YOU CONTRIBUTE, DOOD
Also, you should not back down from your opinion no matter how wrong you may be. Had you reversed yourself, the Drill Sgt. would have beaten you more severely.
You DO love the Virgin Mary, don't you?
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Oh, I didn't back down, I just restated my position in a friendlier manner. I still think the movies I mentioned are not even "movies" by my definition of the term, and could, *maybe*, be arsed to discuss why and how at length...
But now I don't want to, because I hadn't realised you were *that* mad, and I don't appreciate the fact that you chose to so openly ignore my attempt to, you know, take things easy, and tried instead a quick put-down (maybe a bit too quick). You are a bit of a prick in my eyes now, isn't that sad?
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Yu Huang
Take a pill or something. Then read as many old threads as you can.
Once you've caught up enough to understand the wonder that is Jough, feel free to front out the big man if you think you can hang in.
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Dude, I'm cool, and so on. I hope Jough is, too. Wasn't this a bit... unnecessary, or something, to begin with? Don't wear a cape, and don't get mad on the internet about movies.
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Dude, I'm cool, and so on. I hope Jough is, too. Wasn't this a bit... unnecessary, or something, to begin with? Don't wear a cape, and don't get mad on the internet about movies.
jough is just a bored prick.
ignore him.
your opinions of movies are validated.
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Fuck you, Jough. Unbreakable is Shamalayma's best movie.
Fuck you, Huang. The first 3 Star Wars movies are a foundation of our culture! Imagine how many 40 year old virgins there are out there as a result of those movies!
Fuck you, Ark! Don't call Jough a prick.
Fuck you, Dawg! Because..., uh, well just because.
Ahem.
What? Oh, sorry, I thought it was Friday.
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I think you'd better be watching out for Judas Priest, Aug.
Anyway, I have a shameful confession to make: I have not actually seen any of the M. Night Shyamawhatever films. (As someone in Western culture not living under a rock, I have been spoiled on Sixth Sense, Unbreakable, and Signs -- not the Village, but Village sounds like it's sort of pre-spoiler'd.) Are they worth pursuing, even if you know the ending?
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I think you'd better be watching out for Judas Priest, Aug.
Anyway, I have a shameful confession to make: I have not actually seen any of the M. Night Shyamawhatever films. (As someone in Western culture not living under a rock, I have been spoiled on Sixth Sense, Unbreakable, and Signs -- not the Village, but Village sounds like it's sort of pre-spoiler'd.) Are they worth pursuing, even if you know the ending?
No, and if you don't know the ending the answer is still the same.
HTH
[edited because I'm very tired and my spelling is 10 kinds of raunchy today]
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"Unbreakable" is the best Batman movie ever made, and it isn't even about Batman (I now this doesn't make much sense, but it does, in my heart). When
[S P O I L E R S]
the film ends and that note comes up, you know, the one about the "asylum for the criminally insane"
[/S P O I L E R S]
I involuntarily let out a short chiuaua-like yip which fortunately went largely unnoticed; I was so happy, thinking "See? this guy cares!"
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I'm not sure if I already posted in here. I don't think so.
"Thirteen" was the most....ergh. It sucked SO MUCH COCK. Everything about that movie was awful. EVERYTHING.
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I'm not sure if I already posted in here. I don't think so.
"Thirteen" was the most....ergh. It sucked SO MUCH COCK. Everything about that movie was awful. EVERYTHING.
Yes! Thank you for that! I thought I was the only one at the time who thought that viewing that movie was akin to being RAPED IN MY EYEHOLE!
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Yes! Thank you for that! I thought I was the only one at the time who thought that viewing that movie was akin to being RAPED IN MY EYEHOLE!
Yes! EVERYONE ELSE LOVED IT! My friends were confused when I left the movie theater, after the main character's descent into decadence led her to become friends with gasp BLACK PEOPLE! Oh, the HUMANITY!
That movie was a fuck*ng LiveJournal with a budget.
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Well, "Saw", of course.
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Yes! EVERYONE ELSE LOVED IT! My friends were confused when I left the movie theater, after the main character's descent into decadence led her to become friends with gasp BLACK PEOPLE! Oh, the HUMANITY!
That movie was a fuck*ng LiveJournal with a budget.
Exactly! I remember commenting to my friends "Well that happened to me but I wasn't as much of a pussy about it." at times, or "Yeah I did that.. didn't tons of kids do that like 10 years ago even? Are we supposed to be shocked?"
And then the Fear of a Black Planet moment was just... fuck*ng mentally inept.. and backwards. (Oooh.. she's listening to rap now... ) What is this people, the 80's or something? Are we going to start suing Judas Priest for "killing children" again?
On that note my guilty pleasure movie is "Fear of a Black Hat", for one line basically:
"Shit, the hats're what it's all about! See, back when we was still slaves, the white man made the black man work in the fields. Heads totally exposed to the sun. So when the slaves got back from the fields, they was too tired to fight the white man. So what we're sayin' now is: Yo, we got some hats now muh-fuckas!"
Word.
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Thirteen:
So one night in high school I went to the park with some friends, smoked them all up, and then walked with the boyfriend to the local theatre (the last one!) and went to see Thirteen. Yes, on my tiny little budget I managed to waste both drug money and movie money by seeing the ONLY movie one should never see while high. An hour or so in I just started sobbing basically because these girls were so dumb, and i hated them so much, but i had done enough stuff that they reminded me of me, and i cried because i was such a worthless piece of trash. Then I came down and realized none of the previous made any damn sense and that I'd just had some sort of pointless breakdown, most likely because it was such a BAD MOVIE. Also: the weed.
edit: one movie that you SHOULD see high is Constantine. One night I watch SAW and Constantine bootlegs in my friend's living room, and I have a lot of trouble believing I would like either of these had this not been my mindset on first experience. I know for damn sure I would hate SAW. But since then I've seen Constantine maybe 5 times and liked it more every time. And I never see movies that many times. (ALso, has any one seen Thirteen Moons? This shared a few of the smame actors and was set in the same creepy parts of L.A. so I thought they might be the same director or something, but they ain't.)
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I think I mentioned that I liked Unbreakable earlier in this thread, but I'm saying it again just to annoy Jough. And did I ever thank whoever recommended Shaolin Soccer a long time ago?
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"Unbreakable" is the best Batman movie ever made, and it isn't even about Batman
Oh, please. Everyone knows the best Batman movie is Blade.
Unbreakable...good christ what a piece of shit. Imagine watching Star Wars, and when Luke returns to Obi-Wan after seeing his family slaughtered, hearing Luke say "You know...I'm still not sure I'm ready to learn the ways of the Force." And then they wander around Tatooine some more, and then half an hour later Obi-Wan asks Luke if he's ready, and Luke says "I don't know...." And this just keeps going on and on and on until the last ten minutes of the movie, where we get the shitty twist ending.
Terrible, terrible movie. Shame on all involved.
Thirteen was an ABC Afterschool Special on crack, but the girl with the weird name ( Michael Tina Wood? ) was one hot little piece of underage ass. Did I just say that? I never said that. I also never said that in three years, she should do a remake of Emmanuelle In Space with the girl from the Harry Potter movies. That was not me who said that. No.
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I have recommended Shaolin Soccer many times in the past (also, Kung Pow: Enter the Fist) but I don't know if I have have here or to you.
Unbreakable was also a case of blatant telegraphing to the target audience. You don't make a movie that will appeal to comic readers and expect them not to notice the guy who wears purple and black all the time. That villainous wardrobe is right up there with Ensign Expedable in terms of cliches.
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I saw Air Bud IV: Seventh Inning Fetch, but wait, this is a thread for movies you hated. Nevermind.
~Paul
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I liked Unbreakable better when it was called "The Dead Zone."
Seriously - is the guy's "super power" that he's unbreakable, or that he can Know What Evil Lurks in the Hearts of Men* just by touching them?
WTF?
And who didn't see the "twist" from a mile away? It was so heavy-handed and obvious.
* Yeah, Unbreakable ripped off "The Shadow" too.
Thirteen was not a good movie, but that Rachel Wood girl is fuck*ng hot. And still a minor? Not in Pennsylvania she isn't! Sixteen is the age of consent here.
It's only 14 in West Virginia. It's 12 if you have her daddy's permission.
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I liked Unbreakable better when it was called "The Dead Zone."
Seriously - is the guy's "super power" that he's unbreakable, or that he can Know What Evil Lurks in the Hearts of Men* just by touching them?
WTF?
And who didn't see the "twist" from a mile away? It was so heavy-handed and obvious.
* Yeah, Unbreakable ripped off "The Shadow" too.
Well, since I didn't say "Unbreakable" was a flawless piece of art, I have no problem with that. All I said was that it was the best super-hero movie ever done, which only means I rank all other super-hero movies below "Unbreakable", which means those said movies, to my intellectual appreciation, present even more glaring disregard for their subjects than "Unbreakable" does. That's all.
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Thirteen was not a good movie, but that Rachel Wood girl is fuck*ng hot. And still a minor? Not in Pennsylvania she isn't! Sixteen is the age of consent here.
It's only 14 in West Virginia. It's 12 if you have her daddy's permission.
LALALA I CAN'T HEAR YOU I CAN'T HEAR YOU LALALALA!
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Well, since I didn't say "Unbreakable" was a flawless piece of art, I have no problem with that. All I said was that it was the best super-hero movie ever done, which only means I rank all other super-hero movies below "Unbreakable", which means those said movies, to my intellectual appreciation, present even more glaring disregard for their subjects than "Unbreakable" does. That's all.
You misspelled "opinion" there.
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Well, since I didn't say "Unbreakable" was a flawless piece of art, I have no problem with that. All I said was that it was the best super-hero movie ever done, which only means I rank all other super-hero movies below "Unbreakable", which means those said movies, to my intellectual appreciation, present even more glaring disregard for their subjects than "Unbreakable" does. That's all.
Pretty sure The Incredibles is the best superhero movie.
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I will put in a vote for Garden State.
My list of everything that was wrong with Garden State, I shall not get into. Let me say this though. There are no good "indie" movies that feature scenes where a couple sits fully clothed in an empty bathtub and yak about their feelings.
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Well, Choopernickel, my opinion is pretty much based on my intellectual appreciation; there's the emotional response also, of course, but I couldn't connect to those types of movies in an emotional manner (and I tried, I grew up reading them darned comics).
But I concede, yeah, it's my *opinion*, as you wish (Thanks to fuckers in turtlenecks, thanks to fuck*ng Sartre et caterva for turning a perfectly clean term such as "intellectual" into a sure-fire signifyer of wankery and snobbishness of the highest order...).
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Well, if you want to talk about "intellectual appreciation" and "comic book movies" you need to look no further than Sin City.
Now, I happen to think that Sin City was one of the best films of the year, but it was taken so literally from the comic book (shot for shot) that it's hard to applaud it as a film on its own. It's like a moving comic book.
The Spider-Man movies, especially the second one, really captured the feel of the Spider-Man comic. Okay, Mary Jane was miscast, but other things were perfect.
The latest Batman was also VERY true to the comic, if you're looking for "intellectual appreciation" you can't go wrong there. It's like they took Frank Miller's "Batman: Year One" and "The Long Halloween" stories and merged them to make this movie. Batman Begins works as a movie-movie, in addition to being a good comic-book movie. It too is one of the best films of the year.
A History of Violence was a comic-book movie too, and also a very good film even if you didn't know the source material.
The Incredibles was the best Fantastic Four movie ever. When the live-action one came out it was pretty damn weak in comparison.
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Anything that floats your boat, dude, =); they just don't do it for me. As a matter of fact, I hate them.
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Hey, you're entitled to your ill-formed and unsupported opinion, but don't go playing the SCIENCE card on us, calling it your "intellectual appreciation" since you haven't really evidenced intellectual thought in proclaiming your hatred for highly accomplished films. Sounds more like a visceral response than an intellectual one to me, hombre.
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Let's say you were in a coffeeshop with a guy who has been there before. You ask him which of their many coffees is the best.
"Oh," he says, "This one tastes like rancid mud which has been urinated in. I recommend it highly."
"What?" you ask, understandably.
"Because, you see, I hate coffee," replies this strange person. "I despise it. The other blends here taste like the emissions from Satan's bunghole, or perhaps like the pain of a small child whose father and mother have just revealed that they do not love him. All coffee tastes like filth to me, so one that only tastes like mud which has been urinated in is my recommendation."
The next time you go, you ask a different person.
"Well," says he, "they're all pretty good. I like that one best. The others are all pretty tasty, but that one has a particularly subtle flavor."
Which person's advice do you follow?
This story was written to illustrate why I don't give many points to people who don't like superhero movies talking about what the best superhero movie is. Or any such situation.
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I will put in a vote for Garden State.
My list of everything that was wrong with Garden State, I shall not get into. Let me say this though. There are no good "indie" movies that feature scenes where a couple sits fully clothed in an empty bathtub and yak about their feelings.
I like to call it Zach Braff's Face: The Movie
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Here were my top two problems with Garden State-
a) It was another movie about upper-middle class white kids who Got Depression (I have enough of that in my own life, thanks), and
b)Natalie Portman made me want to fuck*ng die. There has never been another character in a movie who I have hated more, even characters who were meant to be annoying. Ernest P. Worrell never made me as annoyed as her. Martin Short has never annoyed me enough as she did in that film. This is an accomplishment.
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Hey Bozack what about Pauly Shore?
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Ok, if you wanna know, but I'm afraid much of it will come across as condescending. For example, the "Spiderman" series: to me those plots were at level with that Power Rangers drivel. From the setup to the payoff, with a few bright spots here and there, flashes of wit which give way to alarming levels of unsubtlety (is that even a word?) so that nobody is left behind. A... "fusion reactor" or something, that was gonna blow at the end. Please.
And Batman, well, I think they wasted a good concept with bad dialogue (I don't care who you are or who you think you know, you put one one-liner in a "serious" movie, you taint it for good and forever). The whole thing of having Batman being trained with Ra's Al Ghul was brilliant, it would have given space for them to talk about some relevant issues, in a relevant manner: Terrorism, idealism, fanaticism, the possibility of promoting change by other means than violence, and on the other hand the fact that sometimes some pricks just *have* to die in order to effect change (in this case they lost a good opportunity of having Batman display the razor sharp intelligence he's so known for in the comics: in the scene in the train, when he leaves Ra's Al Gul to die. It's implied that his reasoning is that if he lets Ra's live there'll always be a threat of some 9/11-type of incident occurring sooner or later, but it's still badly done and too quick - Batman didn't need to have to make this type of choice so early in his career.
A much better approach would be, IMHO: Ra's incapacitated on the floor, the train is racing towards the tower, Batman is preparing to leave. The're exchanging quips about Batman's nature as a terrorist who'll be as ruthless as Ra's. Batman doesn't like that, grabs Ra's by the collar, shakes him, saying: "I'm not a terrorist. I never killed people". Ra's replies something along the lines of "Well, it looks like this is about to change. You cannot have me living, Mr, Wayne". Batman smiles and says "I don't have to worry about it, Ra's; Didn't you say at the party that you were immortal?". Ra's understands where Batman is going and starts laughing. He even applauds, groaning, because Batman pummeled the shit out of him. "Congratulations, detective. I will not underestimate you again." Batman says: "Say it, Ra's, just say you're not immortal and I take you with me". "Go, detective. I will make you beg." Batman turns and leaves. He jumps out of the train, turns mid air and looks. Ra's saying something, looking fixedly at Batman, but we cannot hear what it is. Boom, etc).
Then you have that limping spaz Jim Gordon being a total mongoloid throughout the whole picture... I know there'll be never the perfect movie, everyone has changes they would like to do, and so on. But I think those guys dropped the ball in missing some excellent opportunities to make some memorable scenes.
As you are probably beginning to notice, I can obsess about stuff. I just didn't want to nitpick obsessively over any of those films in depth, because in the end everybody has a different film in their heads.
You too probably would have done stuff differently. In the end I'm just grumpy, that's all there is to it =) I... I even hated the f-f-f-frikkin'uniform.
Is it the best Batman movie ever made? Yes, it is - that's the closest they'll ever get anyway, methinks =/
(And I like Batman *and* coffee)
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...doesn't Mongoloid mean "asian"? Is there another meaning of which I am not aware?
I, personally, am at a loss for movies. I'm turning into someone who cannot go a week without watching a good movie. And here is my problem: nobody I'm friends with can suggest any movies that came out prior to... let's say 2000. Aside from the obvious ones. And all the directors of movies I've liked (Wes Anderson, Sophia Coppola, Jean-Pierre Jeunet) didn't really put out movies until a few years ago. Jeunet did, but I have no way of knowing if they all suck, or are all great, or what.
Right now, my strategy is get movies out of the Foreign section that have Audrey Toutou in them. She is generally in good movies.
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...doesn't Mongoloid mean "asian"? Is there another meaning of which I am not aware?
It's an archaic and currently out-of-favor term to refer to people with Down syndrome, because (if I recall correctly) the facial features typical of the syndrome reminded a researcher of Asian features. Using it as an insult is about two steps below using "retarded."
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I can't say I particularly care, no (and oh, nice bit of my reply you decided to complain about ; )
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I wasn't suggesting you care. I was asking what it meant. Because I wasn't aware that it had any other meaning.
However... You, sir, are rude.
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...doesn't Mongoloid mean "asian"? Is there another meaning of which I am not aware?
It's an archaic and currently out-of-favor term to refer to people with Down syndrome, because (if I recall correctly) the facial features typical of the syndrome reminded a researcher of Asian features. Using it as an insult is about two steps below using "retarded."
I'd say more than two because you hear "retarded" in mildy polite company, but only a true asshole would use "mongoloid." Remember this gem from Gore? "The extreme right wing, the extra chromosome right wing." Seriously.
Oh, and that reminds me. I mentioned the creepy gay guy hitting on my friend in the other thread. At one point the dude made a comment about our friend who is Asian-American, and I said "oh, you only wish you could be Will." He said "no, I don't want to look Oriental." I said, incredulously, "did you just say Oriental?" He didn't get it. Then one of other my friends said "it just means from the East." He is a classics major, but still. Am I missing something? Negro just means black in Spanish, but you don't say it.
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I understand that Oriental isn't used anymore, but I'm not sure I understand why. I never knew it had negative connotations in the way that some of the derisive terms for people of African heritage do.
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b)Natalie Portman made me want to fuck*ng die. There has never been another character in a movie who I have hated more, even characters who were meant to be annoying. Ernest P. Worrell never made me as annoyed as her. Martin Short has never annoyed me enough as she did in that film. This is an accomplishment.
If there's one type of character I've come to hate in movies, especially so-called "indie" movies, it's the Free Spirited Lass Who Does Things That Are Just SO Zany And Random And Oddball. Garden State is like having some constantly nudging you in the ribs while watching it and asking you "Huh? Isn't that weird? Isn't that zany? Isn't that just so quirky? Huh Huh huh?"
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Oh god yes. Sadly, I know enough of those people in real life.
PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT
If you are trying to be zany or crazy or free-spirited, cut it out. It only serves to emphasize that you are lame-ass.
EDIT- Oh, no, Mr. Shore is fuck*ng Brando in comparison to Portman in that film. Of course, I've only seen Biodome, and I was pretty cool with it, given that it gave me the following phrase.
"Roam in the dome and have a beer with a deer."
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If there's one type of character I've come to hate in movies, especially so-called "indie" movies, it's the Free Spirited Lass Who Does Things That Are Just SO Zany And Random And Oddball. Garden State is like having some constantly nudging you in the ribs while watching it and asking you "Huh? Isn't that weird? Isn't that zany? Isn't that just so quirky? Huh Huh huh?"
Just a heads up for those of you who haven't seen Shopgirl: The male lead who isn't Steve Martin (I forget his name) is the exact same as Natalie Portman in Garden State, only a dude. He really brought that movie down a few pegs for me. HE'S A WILD AND CRAZY GUY (once again, not Steve Martin. The other guy)
Edit: Jason Schwartzman
Edit Edit: Holy crap, he's Talia Shire's son. That explains everything.
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He was brilliant in Rushmore, but I haven't really enjoyed anything else he's done (although I did like I Heart Huckabees somewhat, despite him).
His band sucks, too.
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theinevitable: I'm truly sorry. I apologise for my rudeness.
I knew by now I would come out wrong. It's just that I felt I was being picked on since my first post, when I had the audacity to, in a thread about movies people hate, mention some movies I hated. I could only become increasingly hot-tempered after deciding that Jough was definitely out to get me. How could I feel differently? He pounds me for saying I hate some movies he likes, and when we get to a movie that we both agree sucks (Con Air) his voice sounds to me distant, echoing from above, like, like if he was mounting this humongous h.o.r.s.e., you know, this really high h.o.r.s.e.?
jough said:
Con Air is a stupid movie by design. To say you hate it is like saying that you like to breathe air. No shit.
This was his tone, *on the frikkin' movie he agreed that sucked*. I was like, "whoa, dude".
Again, sorry for having failed to control ol' blabbermouth. I tried to avoid it, God is my witness.
* I had to spell "h.o.r.s.e" with the dots, because the board turns it into "hoss" if I don't do it, for some reason
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Did anyone else hate Closer as much as I did?
Not because it offended me or any such thing, just because it was a completely vapid movie meant to sound like it was trying to be "honest" about a relationship via a bunch of liars. Whooopiedooo...
Also now I can't hear anyone say thank you without thinking about Natalie Portman's ass... come to think of it.. that part's not so bad really.
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OK, so.
Closer was like a hell movie. I am in hell when I watch that movie.
and Garden State tricked me into dating a girl who is like that. this is a bad idea. These are the kind of girls who will do horrible horrible things to you, and then expect you to forgive them because they are so wild and zany! And then do them again and again.
Also: yu-huang-- it was just about the mongoloid thing. I don't know.
In a bad teen movie/real life (because real life is, sadly, often like a bad teen movie), Jough is the guy who is kind of mean and sarcastic, but for some reason everyone still likes him. Maybe it's because they all secretly wish they could be that cool and jaded.
Or maybe only I have a friend like that?
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jough said:
Con Air is a stupid movie by design. To say you hate it is like saying that you like to breathe air. No shit.
This was his tone, *on the frikkin' movie he agreed that sucked*. I was like, "whoa, dude".
Again, sorry for having failed to control ol' blabbermouth. I tried to avoid it, God is my witness.
* I had to spell "h.o.r.s.e" with the dots, because the board turns it into "hoss" if I don't do it, for some reason
I know it's been mentioned before, but the fact that Jough is a prick is not a bug - it's a feature. Once you spend enough time here you'll realize this is a wonderful thing. This place would be such a dull place if Jough was nice and had a pet bunny.
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I don't doubt you, really. Dude, don't you know, super-heroes, like, *always* fight when they first meet (I can't believe I actually typed that... ; )
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This place would be such a dull place if Jough was nice and had a pet bunny.
I thought Jough had a pet bunny...
...wait for it...
for dinner.
~Paul
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This place would be such a dull place if Jough was nice and had a pet bunny.
I thought Jough had a pet bunny...
...wait for it...
for dinner.
~Paul
Nah, I'm pretty sure it wassomeone else's pet bunny.
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This place would be such a dull place if Jough was nice and had a pet bunny.
I thought Jough had a pet bunny...
...wait for it...
for dinner.
~Paul
Nah, I'm pretty sure it was someone else's pet bunny.
Holy Fuck, I suck at editing my own posts.
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To jump in on the "Oriental" thing: I think it's definitely not as strongly offensive as many of the words for people of African heritage out there, but it's associated with an era of lack of tolerance; "Oriental" is associated with beliefs about "the mysterious Orient," right out of any terrible film noir movie you might care to name. I suspect it's more akin to terms like "colored" that are not so much deeply intrinsically offensive as it is representative of a more insensitive time.
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and Garden State tricked me into dating a girl who is like that. this is a bad idea.
I once dated a girl like that, until it came out that she liked me partly because she thought I was gay, and wanted to see me and some other dude fuck. That basically killed the romance.
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and Garden State tricked me into dating a girl who is like that. this is a bad idea.
I once dated a girl like that, until it came out that she liked me partly because she thought I was gay, and wanted to see me and some other dude fuck. That basically killed the romance.
Just to drive home the point that Bozack always, always has the best anecdote for any thread.
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ok, so, i can't use the words "orient" or "oriental"?
how about "occidental"?
can i still say "fuck"?
oh, wait, that would offend the Olde Englishe, ande Wee Woun't Wante Thatte.
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To jump in on the "Oriental" thing: I think it's definitely not as strongly offensive as many of the words for people of African heritage out there, but it's associated with an era of lack of tolerance; "Oriental" is associated with beliefs about "the mysterious Orient," right out of any terrible film noir movie you might care to name. I suspect it's more akin to terms like "colored" that are not so much deeply intrinsically offensive as it is representative of a more insensitive time.
I thought about starting to play Legend of 5 Rings. But the website is all, "the Game of Oriental Adventures." I also remember it containing phonoetically accurate place and character names. In the end my most important guide is whether I could talk about something confidentally with a friend or aquantance of a certain nationality. The answer, in Lo5R's case, was no.
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antioch-- if I'm understanding you correctly, that's always been my guide. If you wouldn't say it in front of a person of that nationality, why say it?
Of course, my friends attack me as being ruthlessly PC. I didnt' realize politicians were big fans of screaming at their friends when they make racist jokes.
Also, did you know that ruthlessly comes from Ruth, a bible lady? She was somehow anti-ruthless. she was ruthful. I forget what specifically she did, but it sure was ruthey.
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I thought about starting to play Legend of 5 Rings. But the website is all, "the Game of Oriental Adventures." I also remember it containing phonoetically accurate place and character names. In the end my most important guide is whether I could talk about something confidentally with a friend or aquantance of a certain nationality. The answer, in Lo5R's case, was no.
L5R is The Game Of What-Fanboys-Think-Feudal-Japan-Was-Like-Plus-Some-Maybe-Korea-Or-China-al Fantasy.
Not to dis the game too hard, as the RPG is nonetheless a load of fun and their methodology for the CCG metaplot is intriguing even if I can't follow the thing at all. Anyway, about half the hardcore players I've known of it were one kind of East Asian or another, so I figure it is a game the playing of which will not innately offend all Asians.
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Put me down for Closer hate. All these critics blubbering about how the film is a piercing insight into the human condition or the relations between the genders or this modern world of ours...and it's four thinly drawn, incredibly obnoxious characters engaging in boring games of sexual one-upmanship and awful dialogue. The whole film is just quivering and wobbling from the strain of the actors and scripter and director trying too hard and failing miserably. And again, Portman is supposed to be playing a cold-eyed, mindgaming stripper yet once again she comes off as a chirpy little twerp. But even she pales in comparison that Julia Roberts in yet another "LOOK I CAN ACT REALLY LOOK I'M MORE THAN JUST ANOTHER PRETTY FACE HONEST PLEASE BELIEVE ME" role.
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my mom and dad rented the movie closer, they (or mom at least) are big fans of Julia Roberts.
they did not enjoy the movie, i think she said they stopped watching it.
they did not approve of the language, amongst other things.
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my mom and dad rented the movie closer, they (or mom at least) are big fans of Julia Roberts.
they did not enjoy the movie, i think she said they stopped watching it.
they did not approve of the language, amongst other things.
They had probably chosen the french audio from the DVD menu by mistake. Had they been listening in english I bet the language would've sounded much better.
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Closer comes from a long history of excellent plays interpreted into terrible films... Actually, I haven't seen the film version, but the play was beautiful, and I know just by it's content and presentation that it will not, and should not have been, translated into film.
When it comes to Orientalisms, I took a whole bloody university course on the subject. In the end, I don't think anyone would call you a hood-wearing racist if you called someone Oriental, but some would think you sort of ig'nant. It's just a broad sweep to refer to so many different an varied cultures under a single stereotyped catogorical name. Then again, the local Chines cultural centre puts on a presentation every year that they call the Mysteries of the Orient, so I don't know... In the end I think that Orientalisms are a lot like Westernisms - broad asumptions - some inaccurate, some not - that typify how one culture views the other from one or two steps removed.
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It's okay to say "oriental" but only if you're describing the Top Ramen flavor.