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Trivial Pursuits => Sports & Leisure => Topic started by: Beatrice on November 04, 2005, 05:27:46 pm

Title: SausageFest
Post by: Beatrice on November 04, 2005, 05:27:46 pm

anybody here make /and or season their own sausage?  i'm vegetarian, but i really crave sausage sometimes, purely for the seasoning spices.  Other meats i sometimes want for the actual meat, but with sausage it's always the spices that do it.  i want to maybe try a recipe with fake meat or tofu but with sausage spices in particular.   does that make sense? foooooood experiments!

Title: Re: SausageFest
Post by: jough on November 04, 2005, 05:40:50 pm

Quote from: "Beatrice"

i really crave sausage sometimes

That's really all I read there.  Was there more?

Title: Re: SausageFest
Post by: Mantonio on November 04, 2005, 06:50:41 pm

Quote from: "jough"

Quote from: "Beatrice"

i really crave sausage sometimes

That's really all I read there.  Was there more?

Indeed there was:

Quote from: "beatrice"

with sausage it's always the spices that do it

Title: SausageFest
Post by: AlohaDawg on November 04, 2005, 08:26:22 pm

What you gonna stuff your fake sausages into? Real sausage casings are far from vegetarian.

Stuffing them is pretty rough unless you own a foodprocessor with a sausage attachment (or a sausage stuffing machine)

OF course, who knows what appliances you might own with a sausage attachment...

I would say just fry up some crumbled tofu with salt, pepper, fennel, and a tiny bit of red pepper flakes and you should have something approximating 'sausage' flavor. You could try sage instead of fennel, too.

Title: SausageFest
Post by: Beatrice on November 04, 2005, 08:53:52 pm

well i wasn't thinking of making actually little sausages, just instead trying to prepare food spiced in the manner that sausage is spiced.

Title: SausageFest
Post by: arkabee on November 04, 2005, 09:25:47 pm

Quote from: "Beatrice"

well i wasn't thinking of making actually little sausages, just instead trying to prepare food spiced in the manner that sausage is spiced.

beer.

boil it, bake it, barbeque it, broil it, fry it.

beer.

Title: SausageFest
Post by: Bobby Isosceles on November 04, 2005, 11:23:13 pm

Quote from: "AlohaDawg"

What you gonna stuff your fake sausages into? Real sausage casings are far from vegetarian.

Stuffing them is pretty rough unless you own a foodprocessor with a sausage attachment (or a sausage stuffing machine)

OF course, who knows what appliances you might own with a sausage attachment...

I would say just fry up some crumbled tofu with salt, pepper, fennel, and a tiny bit of red pepper flakes and you should have something approximating 'sausage' flavor. You could try sage instead of fennel, too.

Most sausage casings these days are cellulose.

Title: SausageFest
Post by: misterqueue on November 05, 2005, 01:19:25 am

Note to self: Beatrice likes little sausages.

Title: SausageFest
Post by: AlohaDawg on November 05, 2005, 01:37:31 am

Well duh! Her and Bozack.

Title: SausageFest
Post by: Beatrice on November 06, 2005, 12:41:42 am

tiny but spicy.  ZING!

Title: SausageFest
Post by: Bozack on November 06, 2005, 06:16:26 am

....you know, I can think of only one way to retaliate for having my rad chilies insulted on the internet.
Sassy/drunk picture will be posted in three days.
BEG FOR FORGIVENESS.

Title: SausageFest
Post by: Beatrice on November 06, 2005, 08:22:35 pm

i will delete my account and never talk to you again.  DELETED FOREVER!

Title: SausageFest
Post by: Bozack on November 06, 2005, 10:25:49 pm

Hmmmm.....that could be a boon, you realize.
DISSSSS.

C'mon, I fuck*ng love that picture. It is basically the most awesome picture ever committed to, umm...hard drive.

Title: SausageFest
Post by: misterqueue on November 07, 2005, 03:24:38 am

I'm thinking she's being petulant about this so people keep asking for the pic and thus feeding a possible ego-machine.



Or I'm completely wrong...

However, who am I to ignore possible feeding... FREE THE PIC!  (I am going to make bumper stickers and form a grass roots movement based upon this slogan.  It will have Saturday meetings and Tony will bring his zesty basil and tomato ziti.)

Title: SausageFest
Post by: pmcd9 on November 07, 2005, 04:03:18 am

Quote from: "Bozack"

....you know, I can think of only one way to retaliate for having my rad chilies insulted on the internet.
Sassy/drunk picture will be posted in three days.
BEG FOR FORGIVENESS.

Quote from: "Beatrice"

i will delete my account and never talk to you again. DELETED FOREVER!

Well Bozak, is it worth it?  How hot is this picture?

~Paul

Title: SausageFest
Post by: pmcd9 on November 07, 2005, 04:14:18 am

Or perhaps...

Beatrice, could you provide us with an alternate picture?  One that's not so, how did Boz put it "ghetto."  One that will sate our need to gaze upon your loveliness.  C'mon, Jamie and Virginia went topless for goodness sake.  Don't go all Side Show on us.

~Paul

Title: SausageFest
Post by: mudokon on November 07, 2005, 05:32:21 am

guuuuuuys, come on.

Title: SausageFest
Post by: JorgeFabregas on November 07, 2005, 03:31:02 pm

Have you ever tried GimmeLean veggie sausage? It's pretty tasty. You fry it up in a griddle. In my grocery store it's in the produce section...I think they have it at Trader Joe's as well.
(http://www.lightlife.com/images/gimme_lean_sausage.jpg)

Title: SausageFest
Post by: AlohaDawg on November 07, 2005, 05:35:20 pm

What's the main ingredient in that substance?

Title: SausageFest
Post by: JorgeFabregas on November 07, 2005, 07:40:09 pm

Why, water of course! After that it's soy protein concentrate (everyone's favorite).

(Made from water, soy protein concentrate, tapioca starch, soy sauce (water, soybeans, wheat, salt), soy protein isolate, wheat gluten, malt extract, evaporated cane juice, beet powder, spices, natural flavors (from vegetable sources), vegetable gum. No nitrites. No MSG.)

Title: SausageFest
Post by: Beatrice on November 07, 2005, 07:50:01 pm

It is a BAD picture.  If he has others to post, it is probably cool, but the ones you showed me Bozack, get you MEGA hate points.

Title: SausageFest
Post by: CortJstr on November 07, 2005, 07:59:59 pm

Quote from: "Beatrice"

It is a BAD picture.  If he has others to post, it is probably cool, but the ones you showed me Bozack, get you MEGA hate points.

Can these hate points be traded in for valuable prizes? Or perhaps they're needed in order to level up. Where can I get me some hate points? Because life is sucking with my CHA stuck at 3.

Title: SausageFest
Post by: pmcd9 on November 08, 2005, 03:38:06 am

Quote from: "Bozack"

C'mon, I fuck*ng love that picture. It is basically the most awesome picture ever committed to, umm...hard drive.

I'm guessing, that when you and Bea were together, this is exactly how you sounded when you were begging for sex.

~Paul

Title: SausageFest
Post by: miles on November 08, 2005, 06:12:38 am

Quote from: "mudokon"

guuuuuuys, come on.

Yeah, but what do you think she can expect, posting a message about sausage...

Title: SausageFest
Post by: Bozack on November 09, 2005, 08:12:54 am

Quote from: "pmcd9"

I'm guessing, that when you and Bea were together, this is exactly how you sounded when you were begging for sex.

Low blow, Paul. I'll do you one better- I don't particularly care for your moustache!

I'm sorry, Paul. That's not true. I was just lashing out.

Title: SausageFest
Post by: Golfhaus on November 09, 2005, 06:17:03 pm

IT HAS BEEN THREE DAYS. What is the verdict?

Title: SausageFest
Post by: jough on November 09, 2005, 07:17:58 pm

Yeah dude, it's been like, four days now.

WHERE ARE THE PHOTOS?

Title: SausageFest
Post by: Bozack on November 09, 2005, 07:48:49 pm

Hergh, I'm going to have to back down. See, I actually have to see her over Thanksgiving break, and if I post these, I am not going to have testicles by Christmas. That's the long and short of it.

Title: SausageFest
Post by: Golfhaus on November 09, 2005, 08:06:47 pm

We see... Bozack's not a team player.

The mission then is to take pictures over Thanksgiving that make this one look like the Mona Lisa, and post THEM.

Title: SausageFest
Post by: jough on November 09, 2005, 11:28:34 pm

Bozack, you fuck*ng pussy.

P.S. my email address is below.

Title: SausageFest
Post by: CortJstr on November 10, 2005, 12:00:35 am

Quote from: "Bozack"

Hergh, I'm going to have to back down. See, I actually have to see her over Thanksgiving break, and if I post these, I am not going to have testicles by Christmas. That's the long and short of it.

And then you'd have to change your user name again which was confusing enough the first time.

Title: SausageFest
Post by: misterqueue on November 10, 2005, 12:54:09 am

bozack was slowly turning into my secret internet hero, but now.. now he's just like all the others.

I'm so disillusioned that I'm going to go to business school!

Title: SausageFest
Post by: Mantonio on November 10, 2005, 05:35:05 am

Quote from: "misterqueue"

bozack was slowly turning into my secret internet hero, but now.. now he's just like all the others.

I'm so disillusioned that I'm going to go to business school!

Way to shit on someone's dream Bozack. Or should I say ... Flayed Bozack?

Title: SausageFest
Post by: mudokon on November 10, 2005, 07:34:03 am

Stop that. Stop pressuring the guy.

Title: SausageFest
Post by: Doc on November 10, 2005, 10:15:34 am

What fun is that?

Can we at least get some shots of Gina? I'd like to see what she'd do to a turkey.

Title: SausageFest
Post by: AlohaDawg on November 10, 2005, 05:38:15 pm

Quote from: "Doc"

What fun is that?

Can we at least get some shots of Gina? I'd like to see what she'd do to a turkey.

GinaTurDucken!

Chicken in the duck in the turkey in Gina! She could give birth to it on a platter right on the Thanksgiving table!

Title: SausageFest
Post by: pmcd9 on November 10, 2005, 11:45:06 pm

Quote from: "AlohaDawg"

Quote from: "Doc"

What fun is that?

Can we at least get some shots of Gina? I'd like to see what she'd do to a turkey.

GinaTurDucken!

Chicken in the duck in the turkey in Gina! She could give birth to it on a platter right on the Thanksgiving table!

Looks like i'll be skipping Thanksgiving this year.  Thanks a lot Dawg, that's a whole hell of a lot.  How am I gonna get that image out of my mind in under two weeks?

~Paul

Title: SausageFest
Post by: misterqueue on November 10, 2005, 11:50:28 pm

Quote from: "pmcd9"

Quote from: "AlohaDawg"

Quote from: "Doc"

What fun is that?

Can we at least get some shots of Gina? I'd like to see what she'd do to a turkey.

GinaTurDucken!

Chicken in the duck in the turkey in Gina! She could give birth to it on a platter right on the Thanksgiving table!

Looks like i'll be skipping Thanksgiving this year.  Thanks a lot Dawg, that's a whole hell of a lot.  How am I gonna get that image out of my mind in under two weeks?

~Paul

Speak for yourself.. I may ask for an EXTRA helping now.

Title: SausageFest
Post by: jough on November 11, 2005, 12:12:45 am

We could all have Thanksgiving INSIDE GINA'S COOTER and would still be able to invite the entire membership of dumbrella to join us.

With room to spare, plus play touch football before we ate.

Title: SausageFest
Post by: Golfhaus on November 11, 2005, 06:16:14 pm

I understand Gina is the alternate site for the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade if it rains in NYC this year.

Title: SausageFest
Post by: jough on November 11, 2005, 06:50:41 pm

After running out of room for detainees at Gitmo, Gina's expansive pu$$y is now the alternate location for holding, interigating, feeding, and transporting prisoners.  Also, it keeps them warm in the winter, and can function as a bomb shelter in case of nuclear war (its man-juice caked walls offer better protection from radiation than lead does).

Title: SausageFest
Post by: V-Adore on November 11, 2005, 07:01:10 pm

Man, we're working some rough chuckles these days, guys.

Title: SausageFest
Post by: misterqueue on November 11, 2005, 07:08:24 pm

Quote from: "V-Adore"

Man, we're working some rough chuckles these days, guys.

Jough's trying to get inside your head, you know?

Title: SausageFest
Post by: V-Adore on November 11, 2005, 07:17:56 pm

Quote from: "misterqueue"

Quote from: "V-Adore"

Man, we're working some rough chuckles these days, guys.

Jough's trying to get inside your head, you know?

Really? And here I assumed he was trying to get inside somewhere else. Somewhere more "man-juice caked," if I may borrow a phrase from Fearless Leader.

Title: SausageFest
Post by: Bozack on November 11, 2005, 08:08:15 pm

You know, I don't think I'm going to read this thread anymore.

Title: SausageFest
Post by: AugustWest on November 11, 2005, 08:32:12 pm

Yeah, the title of this thread is becoming oddly apropos.

Title: SausageFest
Post by: misterqueue on November 11, 2005, 08:47:03 pm

Quote from: "AugustWest"

Yeah, the title of this thread is becoming oddly apropos.

Hrm.. I'm not sure but I think V should be offended by that.

Title: SausageFest
Post by: Bobby Isosceles on November 11, 2005, 09:06:27 pm

Getting back on topic, I just got nearly a hundred dollars in German sausage as a birthday present. And that is truly Rad.

Also, for whoever started this thread and wanted sausage info:
http://www.ext.nodak.edu/extpubs/yf/foods/he176w.htm - subsitute with tofu or portabella mushrooms for the meat.

Wikipedia confirms most sausage casings are cellulose these days.

Title: SausageFest
Post by: arkabee on November 11, 2005, 09:11:31 pm

i worked at a jimmie dean plant for three nights.

Title: SausageFest
Post by: Bobby Isosceles on November 11, 2005, 09:15:25 pm

Quote from: "arkabee"

i worked at a jimmie dean plant for three nights.

I can see a modern day retelling of the Jesus/Dumuzi myth here...

Title: SausageFest
Post by: Golfhaus on November 11, 2005, 11:40:48 pm

Quote from: "arkabee"

i worked at a jimmie dean plant for three nights.

Gina once took a WHOLE JIMMY DEAN PLANT...

...eh, never mind. It's no fun doing it by yourself (ain't THAT the truth).

Title: SausageFest
Post by: misterqueue on November 11, 2005, 11:51:13 pm

Yeah.. then it's just masturbation...





much like self-improvement

Title: SausageFest
Post by: Beatrice on November 14, 2005, 03:10:41 pm

I am never coming HERE again.

Title: SausageFest
Post by: Doc on November 14, 2005, 04:38:25 pm

Could you give your account to Gina?

Tell her you can't come here anymore because you asked about our sausage.

Title: SausageFest
Post by: jough on November 14, 2005, 05:04:04 pm

Awesome - so now Bozack can post those photos of you and you'll never see them!

Title: SausageFest
Post by: misterqueue on November 14, 2005, 05:46:41 pm

That was a weird inflection.. never coming HERE again I mean.

Does that imply you're coming other places?  Inquiring minds wanna know.

Title: SausageFest
Post by: pmcd9 on November 15, 2005, 03:58:02 am

Bozack you need to talk to your girlfriend.  Does she actually think she's gonna find another group of internet guys that are less degenerate than us?  No, the answer is no she is not.  We love you B, don't leave us.  We promise from now on we'll always take the high road.  Sometimes a sausage is just a sausage.  That's what you want to hear right?  Speaking of sausage, last night I had some really fine venison sausage.  It was good.  It was in link form, but the links were smaller than you're typical sausage link.  Kinda like Bozacks wang is smaller than your typical wang*.  Oh Damn, I can't believe I just wrote that.  Dammit what was I thinking.  Well shit I guess B's gone forever now.  Forgive me Beatrice I tried, God knows I tried, but comparing a sausage link to genetalia is genetically encoded in the male brain**.  It's just something we have to do.

~Paul

*Sorry Bozack you know I love you.
**This is actual science***
***Not actual science

Title: SausageFest
Post by: Doc on November 15, 2005, 01:57:50 pm

Damnit Paul, I really want to add something, I mean so many wonderful double entendres to play off but I think you've already won the thread so.... oh well.
Good show sir.

Title: SausageFest
Post by: Bozack on November 16, 2005, 12:20:29 am

OKAY.
WE HAVE COME TO AN AGREEMENT.
I am allowed to post the picture, but I had to Photoshop it to reflect my actual view as I took it. Let me explain what that view was.
I was INCREDIBLY high.
I was so high that, a few minutes before, we were in the woods smoking, and I threw up in my mouth, a fair amount (I have no idea why that happened), and spat it out onto the forest floor. I then said, "Whoa! I just threw up!", and everyone I was with spent three minutes trying to cope with that idea.
So here (http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v51/Bozack/sassyannahigh.jpg) is the photo. Enjoy.

Title: SausageFest
Post by: Beatrice on November 16, 2005, 12:23:04 am

OH NO!

Title: SausageFest
Post by: CortJstr on November 16, 2005, 12:37:53 am

Oh yes!

Title: SausageFest
Post by: AlohaDawg on November 16, 2005, 12:55:30 am

What could possibly be objectionable about that photo if it were unblurrified?

Title: SausageFest
Post by: Bozack on November 16, 2005, 01:06:21 am

Quote from: "AlohaDawg"

What could possibly be objectionable about that photo if it were unblurrified?

Beatrice objected to that photo because she has a UTERUS, and thus, all photographs of her make her look "fat," in her BIZARRE PARALLEL UTERUS UNIVERSE.

Title: SausageFest
Post by: arkabee on November 16, 2005, 04:03:28 am

Quote from: "Bozack"

Beatrice objected to that photo because she has a UTERUS, and thus, all photographs of her make her look "fat," in her BIZARRE PARALLEL UTERUS UNIVERSE.

i have never ever seen this work, zack.  i don't know what the correct phrase is, but i believe it involves large chunks of stone attached to sculpted metal.

Title: SausageFest
Post by: jough on November 16, 2005, 04:19:37 am

Yeah, and Bozack, you're not exactly Mr. Sensitive about girls worrying about being fat, what with your posting about Bea's gunt when she first started posting here and all.

YOU ARE A TERRIBLE LITTLE BULLSHIT MAN

Anyway, as expected, the photo is a disappointment and nothing to get all upset about for either 'zack or 'trice.

Even if you copped out by posting it all blurry-like.

Title: SausageFest
Post by: side_show on November 16, 2005, 04:28:04 am

Quote from: "arkabee"

zack

Zack, Zack, Zack, Zack,
He's a Lego Maniac!
Zack, Zack, Zack, Zack,
He's a Lego Maniac!! (http://www.nathanbrickartist.com/rabbit_ambulance.html)


I'm sorry... I don't know what just came over me....

Title: SausageFest
Post by: arkabee on November 17, 2005, 04:17:25 pm

Quote from: "side_show"

Quote from: "arkabee"

zack

Zack, Zack, Zack, Zack,
He's a Lego Maniac!
Zack, Zack, Zack, Zack,
He's a Lego Maniac!! (http://www.nathanbrickartist.com/rabbit_ambulance.html)


I'm sorry... I don't know what just came over me....

i,
i have this effect on people.
sometimes.

i'm sorry.

terribly sorry.

Title: SausageFest
Post by: pmcd9 on November 23, 2005, 04:40:03 am

I was thinking about you Beatrice when I snapped this (http://www.paulmcrae.com/images/Miscellany/Misc/DSCN8982-E-1024.jpg) picture.

~Paul

Title: SausageFest
Post by: Ben-San on November 23, 2005, 07:02:04 am

That's a nice pile of meat there.

Title: SausageFest
Post by: CortJstr on November 23, 2005, 01:58:31 pm

Why that's meat. On top of meat . . . on top of...Damn you Burger King!

Title: SausageFest
Post by: jough on November 23, 2005, 04:08:46 pm

It's so true, Paul.  I can not think of disgusting sausage without thinking of Beatrice.

Beat Rice, you'll always mean "possibly wormy homemade sausage" to me, baby.

Title: SausageFest
Post by: Beatrice on November 24, 2005, 05:20:53 pm

possibly?

Title: SausageFest
Post by: jough on November 24, 2005, 08:24:07 pm

I will not actually eat the sausage to find out.