The OFFICIAL Unofficial Achewood Message Board
Achewood => Achewood => Topic started by: V-Adore on November 17, 2006, 11:28:26 am
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Heavy stuff. (http://www.achewood.com/index.php?date=11172006)
The real question: what kind of crappy miracle multiplies giraffe by padding them with mung bean sprouts? Laaaame!
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Dangerous questions indeed.
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I am glad Philippe took this one to Mr. Bear and not Lie Bot.
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I am glad Philippe took this one to Mr. Bear and not Lie Bot.
Then what is this, not a piece of the true cross?
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Another strip of the year. Jesus by a nose, yes I would agree with that. Rachel Ray on the other hand would smoke that foo.
~Paul
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Another strip of the year. Jesus by a nose, yes I would agree with that. Rachel Ray on the other hand would smoke that foo.
~Paul
BOO TO THAT. Alton Brown would turn loaves into giraffees and then explain, by means of styrofoam models and a convoy of toy trucks, exactly how he did it.
Plus there would be cool "booo-WOOOP" sound effects when he turned water into wine.
I've been to Emeril's restaurant in New Orleans. I've also been to church. I give my vote to Emeril.
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Then what is this, not a piece of the true cross?
Well, it's a piece of a true cross...
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Plus there would be cool "booo-WOOOP" sound effects when he turned water into wine.
I thought that would happen no matter who did it.
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Another strip of the year. Jesus by a nose, yes I would agree with that. Rachel Ray on the other hand would smoke that foo.
~Paul
Actually I think she'd just annoy him into submission. Then while he was begging for mercy she'd explain how to eat in DC for $40 as long has you never have a beverage, don't tip, and convince them to waive sales tax.
As for Alton vs. Jesus then Alton wins no contest. He would only lose points for his inability to pronounce the word "grease" and the fact that "alot" seems to slide through his editing process.
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Mr. Bear gently admonishes and confuses the poor little shaver.
Lyle (http://www.achewood.com/index.php?date=01072004), Teodor (http://www.achewood.com/index.php?date=08122004) and Lie Bot (http://www.achewood.com/index.php?date=11052001), on the other hand, do active harm.
GUESS WHICH I FIND PREFERABLE
HINT: Drew Weing's version (http://www.achewood.com/index.php?date=03312003)
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This is the first strip in a while that actually gave me a bona fide chortle. Thank you Mr. O for brightening an already kinda crappy day.
Re: Emeril Vs. Jesus, I'd say Emeril edges out Jesus if you discount the divinity factor in order to level the playing field. But yeah, Alton hands down.
But who would win in a fight?
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Alton can't help it about the 'grease' words because he's a Southerner. And he would win any fight because he'd have the technology - smothering the opponent with his collection of styrofoam balls, for a start. And disorienting them by those constant shots of him from weird angles inside appliances.
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Ah, Emeril vs. Jesus, one of the typical match ups that as kids, were the staple of our imaginations. Oh, the confrontations in who would win between Jesus and Superman, and during the holidays Jesus versus Santa was a classic.
I guess I need the poor otter to be tortured for me to enjoy his appearances :-[
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As for Alton vs. Jesus then Alton wins no contest. He would only lose points for his inability to pronounce the word "grease" and the fact that "alot" seems to slide through his editing process.
I am a devoted fan of Good Eats (an AB Apostle, if you will) and I've never noticed the "grease" or "alot" problems. I have, however, picked up on his tendency to say "uh" every fourth word when he's trying so say something complicated without coming off like a smarty##### (which he is). Watch the scallop show that he did on a boat and it will drive you insane.
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Actually isn't it just the word 'greasy' that is the Southern problem? I used to know this but I'm not in the business anymore...
More of a problem is that I think sometimes Alton has lost his mind. Does he really think any reasonable person will stir-fry pad thai in a wok on their barbeque grill? And, when he makes everything else from scratch - I mean, from scratch practically at the molecular level - what possessed him to make eclairs and fill them with instant vanilla pudding? Not even the kind in the box that you cook - instant. You go to all the trouble to make eclair pastry and then fill it with yellow chemical sludge?
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You go to all the trouble to make eclair pastry and then fill it with yellow chemical sludge?
?HURGHH?
!HURGHH!
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Actually isn't it just the word 'greasy' that is the Southern problem? I used to know this but I'm not in the business anymore...
Alton will instruct you to "greeze" a cookie sheet or use a "greezed" loaf pan. But you hear him say "greezy" way more often.
On two different episodes (I forget which two) "alot" was written on screen. I believe it was in pre-commercial factoids.
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Must be a southern thing, because that's how I say each of those words.
I do not, however, write "alot".
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I'm thinking about making my own shrine to Louis Pasteur.
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I thought that would happen no matter who did it.
squee (http://www.achewood.com/index.php?date=09162005)
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Alton's growing ability to give in on pre-fab ingredienture is slightly disturbing but... I think at the end of the day, there's certain lengthy topics where he'd have to... like... cut back on some of the explanation and skits and such to tell the whole story.
And ultimately that's not what he's there for. If we wanted the full explanation, we could go to... the shrill Southern woman or... the hefty lady who seems to only hang out with homosexuals or... the girl from Italy that clearly purges after every goddamn bite of pancetta.
Granted, the only show on there that's full-on about fusing freshly made stuff and pre-fab has... slowly evolved into a series of bends and angles wherein we can see the hostess's (somewhat slight to begin with) cleavage but...
I'll take the styrofoam molecules and the weird costumes anyday and, y'know, just go online to find an alternative to melting down pudding pops as my filling.
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You go to all the trouble to make eclair pastry and then fill it with yellow chemical sludge?
But, but, but...
Pudding was another show.
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But, but, but...
Pudding was another show.
I still like the yogurt show. Apparently one the ingredients you need to make your own yogurt is store-bought yogurt.
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I still like the yogurt show. Apparently one the ingredients you need to make your own yogurt is store-bought yogurt.
I guess that's because when you're making yogurt you're actually breeding living things. Like to make mice, you need to start with mice, and to make cows, you need to start with cows and so on.
Hmm, I'm a little sorry about that yogurt I had for breakfast now that I thought of this.
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Hmm, I'm a little sorry about that yogurt I had for breakfast now that I thought of this.
Why? Those yogurt cultures are STILL ALIVE. IN YOUR BELLY.
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The death sound of yogurt is?
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Why? Those yogurt cultures are STILL ALIVE. IN YOUR BELLY.
Which is why they recommend eating yogurt while taking anti-biotics. To replenish the bacteria that are supposed to live in your stomach.