The OFFICIAL Unofficial Achewood Message Board
Achewood => Achewood => Topic started by: Drygioni on January 01, 2007, 11:26:26 pm
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http://www.achewood.com/index.php?date=01022007 (http://www.achewood.com/index.php?date=01022007)
As always, better suggestion for title welcome. I've cycled through a few good contenders.
Pat's WHO IN THE HELL? in the first panel seems to suggest a return to his dickish ways. Perhaps it is just early New Years, and Ray still hasn't managed to run around the entire block since Christmas.
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http://www.achewood.com/index.php?date=01022007 (http://www.achewood.com/index.php?date=01022007)
Quality aged gay.
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I wanted to start the first thread of the new year, but I didn't really have anything to say.
Is Ray taking the piss, or is that how he pictures gay dudes? Because the latter is alot funnier.
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1.01.2007. Cask Strength Gay.
« on: Today at 03:27:39 PM »
by *****_god
January the 2nd, 2007 - Cask Strength Gay
Today at 03:26:26 PM
by JudyIsADickSlap
Sorry *****_got, I think that Judy beat you to the punch.
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Ray's ideas about homosexual romance are hilarious.
Also, a leopard doesn't change its spots. Pat's always gonna be a jerk. Now he's a better dressed jerk with some refined grooming habits who can finally acknowledge that he likes other men instead of being a closeted, repressed jerk.
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Fraid so.
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Who knocks on a persons door without first making an appointment through the mail? The nerve of some people.
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See, I didn't think Pat came off as that harsh. Compared to some of his previous antics, being slightly irritated when the doorbell rings is donating to Amnesty International.
Speculation: is Pat's "yarmulke look" really a natural development of his baldness, or the belated revenge of a barber with a long memory?
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See, I didn't think Pat came off as that harsh. Compared to some of his previous antics, being slightly irritated when the doorbell rings is donating to Amnesty International.
Speculation: is Pat's "yarmulke look" really a natural development of his baldness, or the belated revenge of a barber with a long memory?
Hahaha, that would be sweet poetic justice.
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My brain reels at the idea of a cat... which is theorethically covered in fur... having male pattern stubble on its head where a person does... despite the fact that it is still a cat, pretty much covered in fur overwise.
Let alone that the baldness forms a Rorsharch pattern evoking the genital folds of some kind of lady alien, very different from lady humans OR lady cats, but still the alien version of a lady.
The ways in which these characters are sometimes cats, sometimes people, sometimes both and sometimes sort of neither will... probably confuse and fascinate me forever.
They're not like in "Garfield" where cats look like cartoony exaggerations of cats that just act and think like people and... they're not like Japanese-beastiality/furry pornography either, where they're just human girls with cat ears and cat tails and fur all over their horrible horrible atrocity bodies.
Achewood hangs in some contradictory fuge state between these approaches, like a semi-lucid dream where you can bring back the dead just by looking at your hands but can't summon up girls you knew in college (naked) to save your life.
Absurdist poetry where just as you think you've gotten the point, it slips back through your hands like sand.
I should be completely laughing at Ray's faux-classy frat-boy trying-to-be-sensitive-and-not-at-all-getting-it-because-he's-Ray vision of the gay life... it is funny... but man, I'm just stuck on this. How does a cat have male pattern baldness and also have hair all over his body?
X-Men comics also did this to me. They said Nightcrawler was covered in blue fur but, in effect, he always looked to just have blue skin... and then he had normal "hair" on his head? It completely threw my twelve-year-old mind off. Did he have to shave "normal" hair from becoming a beard but the fuzz underneath grows back semi-instantly?
The movies, of course, punted and just gave him blue skin with lotsa scars and tattoos and stuff. This may or may not be because Nightcrawler was played and directed by two dudes, both gayer than fifteen Pats in a bathhouse.
If Ray's wisdom teaches us anything, it's that dudes that gay don't have time to be reasoning out the Nightcrawler skin/hair paradox, they're too busy gettin' drunk in hotel rooms, all sendin' out for dudes.
"Screw it," Singer might say, "...he's just got blue skin and tattoos, okay? I GOTS TO GET MY GAY ON!"
This is how most decisions are made in Hollywood. We call it Occam's Gay Razor.
The gayest member of the crew is given the hardest decisions and a bottle of expensive booze. His need to quickly get his gay on forces him to come up with options that no one else could even picture, without the pressure of needing to get one's gay on.
Us straighties'll stand around playing Tetris on our cellphones while the gay dudes push through all the difficult choices with the help of Occam's Gay Razor. While all this is going on, the lesbians are building the sets.
It's a rich tapestry.
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gestalts confuse me
Dude. Comic. Zen.
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Dude. Comic. Zen.
Your summary, Robert, is apt but misses out on all the stuff about Nightcrawler and Occam's Gay Razor.
The lunch is not the meal.
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Your summary, Robert, is apt but misses out on all the stuff about Nightcrawler and Occam's Gay Razor.
The lunch is not the meal.
Henceforth, your brevity maximizes our comprehension.
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man. occam's gay razor. awesome.
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I just want to make sure this line doesn't get lost:
This may or may not be because Nightcrawler was played and directed by two dudes, both gayer than fifteen Pats in a bathhouse.
What's better, "gayer than fifteen Pats in a bathhouse" as an analogy, or the image of fifteen Pats in a bathhouse?
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What's better, "gayer than fifteen Pats in a bathhouse" as an analogy, or the image of fifteen Pats in a bathhouse?
Either way, it's roughly 8.7 Travoltas on the Travolta Gayometer.
It goes to ten but ten Travoltas has never actually been achieved.
"Tom Cruise mounting Vin Diesel in a field of wildflowers" was tentatively measured as 9.4 Travoltas but those pictures were destroyed in a mysterious arson... the only clue to which was a piece of graffiti art that read "Xenu is a fink!"
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fifteen Pats in a bathhouse would result in such serious arguments over towels. There would be bloodshed.
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fifteen Pats in a bathhouse would result in such serious arguments over towels. There would be bloodshed.
Not to mention filthy shared water and that ASS attendant at the door who needs to be FIRED IMMEDIATELY
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Man, I love you guys.
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Why has no one commented on the fact that Ray's writer pseudonym is R. Dorado?
I mean, that kind of subtle shit is gold. Basically like treasure.
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Why has no one commented on the fact that Ray's writer pseudonym is R. Dorado?
I mean, that kind of subtle shit is gold. Basically like treasure.
I don't get the reference. Can you explain it for us?
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Bobby is perhaps playing on the fact that 'dorado' means 'gold' in Spanish?
Although the first thing I think of is that it is a giraffe (http://www.mbayaq.org/cr/SeafoodWatch/web/sfw_factsheet.aspx?fid=21). What I didn't know till now was that it is the same giraffe as Mahi Mahi. Irrelevant education.
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I know Alan Cumming played Nightcrawler, but who was the other one?
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I know Alan Cumming played Nightcrawler, but who was the other one?
X-Men/Superman-Returns-With-A-Kid-And-Can-Lift-CONTINENTS-Of-Kryptonite-Somehow director Bryan Singer is... like... profoundly gay. Cartoonishly gay. Buddy on "Kids in the Hall" won't talk to him because he considers him too much of a stereotype gay. Confetti spontaneously forming in the air around him gay.
Seriously, I've got friends who've attended parties of his and... like... his house is just full of statues of c*ckes and naked men. Water fountains where the weiner holes are and everything. Apparently, he's also one of those directors who believes that you rule through fear, randomly throwing fits and firing people just to keep them on their toes. Screams a lot.
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I'm not sure what it says about my psyche, but Pat's bald spot looks like the Bungie logo to me.
(http://images.google.com/images?q=tbn:xPxyacU6nL3sEM:http://marathon.bungie.org/spoiler/tm2/resources/big-logo.gif)