The OFFICIAL Unofficial Achewood Message Board
Trivial Pursuits => Sports & Leisure => Topic started by: RMJ12345 on March 31, 2007, 09:23:34 pm
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I just made my first trip to an ABC store (gov't-owned liquor vendors of VA) to buy my first legal bottles of booze (after seven mixed drinks on my 21st and a 40-ounce of Steel Reserve at Sheetz). I wandered around the store, mulling over my first purchase, until I was thought of this strip (http://achewood.com/index.php?date=03022006), and purchased Christian Brothers brandy.
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It is important to buy horrible booze when you are too young and poor to know better. This supports the important terrible booze industry.
How was it?
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yech... Christian Brothers, eh? Good luck with that.
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I hope you also bought a really bad supermarket turkey and a plastic spork. Any other way would just be uncivilized.
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It is important to buy horrible booze when you are too young and poor to know better. This supports the important terrible booze industry.
How was it?
Haven't had it yet. I don't yet know good liquor from bad liquor (though I'm learning about beer) so it all pretty much tastes the same to me...no harm, no foul, booze industry.
My dorm fridge is filled with booze of all kinds, packs of mayo, and birth control. On the front is written: "Studying is for fags" and a picture of Barack Obama. I believe it encapsulates my college experience.
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(after seven mixed drinks on my 21st and a 40-ounce of Steel Reserve at Sheetz).
At one time? How sick did you get?
And, did I get this old without someone telling me you are supposed to keep the birth control in the fridge? You do know that that thing with the Coke doesn't work, right?
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My dorm fridge is filled with booze of all kinds, packs of mayo, and birth control. On the front is written: "Studying is for fags" and a picture of Barack Obama.
Do I want to know what that mayonnaise is for?
Can it possibly be worse than my nebulous incompletely-imagined hypotheticals?
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To play devil's advocate, it might be for sammiches. Booze-and-BC sammiches.
Mmmmmmmm.
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That'd be absolutely horrible.
I mean, it can be hard enough to bite cleanly enough through ham that you don't just pull the whole slice out; you'd have no chance at all with latex.
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I don't see how someone could make it to the age of 21 in this country and not know about good booze. You are supposed to get your Boone's Farm and Keystone drunks out of the way when you are fifteen (Swain's First Bike Ride).
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That'd be absolutely horrible.
I mean, it can be hard enough to bite cleanly enough through ham that you don't just pull the whole slice out; you'd have no chance at all with latex.
True Confessions: While I never did this myself, the people I lived with my freshman year of college would regularly sit around the common room chewing flavored condoms. (As we were the First-Year Residential Seminar dorm, taking Religion 101 and generally being dorks, this is how the majority of our free-from-the-Health-Center condoms got used up.)
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the only liquor that I can tell that it's bad is like... really really bad beer, and vodka. Because bad vodka is basically Gasoline.
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Christian Bros was pretty harsh on the gullet the one time I had it. Also, I think the birth control is in the fridge because its supposed to be kept in a cool dry dark place and virginia gets warm and humid.
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I do know that "The Ring" is supposed to be kept refrigerated until inside where a lady is most awesome so as to maintain maximum Baby Stopping effectiveness. I don't think pills are so finicky.
Also, on the topic of cheap college liquors, I once had the line in a short film in college:
"Salignac... the champagne of cognacs. He's close."
I was playing a mortician with a split personality, tracking his assistant mortician down through the streets of Syracuse because he kidnapped a corpse that they were both in love with. That all three of them were in love with, if you wanna get technical. I can't believe I got to do such things and only walk out with twenty grand of suffocating debt.
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If I was a dude of uterus, there's no way in hell I'd leave my birth control in a communal dorm fridge. I'd have all these ADD night visions of pranksters replacing my Ortho-Whoozits with Tic-Tacs. One minute I'm thinking, "Daaamn, that's some minty-ass estrogen there," the next I'm creating an account with Upromise.
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If I was a dude of uterus, there's no way in hell I'd leave my birth control in a communal dorm fridge.
Well, take heart in the fact that you are at least a dude of CAN'D.
That is an excellent turn of phrase you got there.
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The birth control is circumstantial, not mine - my friend/neighbor (who coincidentally has the same birthdate as me) is keeping her NuvaRing in my fridge.
As for the prior alcohol purchases, the seven mixed drinks were on my actual birthday, and it was a bit much. The Steel Reserve was a "fuck, I can buy myself a 40!" impulse purchase right before going to the ABC store.
I didn't start drinking until college pretty much, and I'm still not a heavy drinker, so I still don't really have a discriminating palate as far as booze goes. Which is cheaper.
The mayo is random; I just had them leftover and saw no reason to toss them. I love mayonnaise.
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One of my more tragic college discoveries was that a pony keg doesn't keep - even if you refrigerate it. I had visions of tapping a cold one at will for weeks on end, but within 3 days it had turned vile. Turns out the standard pump pressurizer that you get with a keg you buy for a party just pumps regular old oxygen containing room air into your jug of delight, rapidly oxidizing the delicious malt flavors into cardboardiness. Now, these many years later, I've got a CO2 pressurizing system for my homebrew kegs, and my dreams of at-will draft beer have been realized.
Also, the Xtian Bros brandy is a fine choice IMO. Its not like Rumjay is swilling pre-mixed cosmos-in-a-can here. A few fingers of brandy in a short tumbler, neat, is a pretty sophisticated option for contemplating required reading in college.
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Well, take heart in the fact that you are at least a dude of CAN'D.
That is an excellent turn of phrase you got there.
I was thinking that in 50 years, when Acheland is opened the bathrooms might be labeled "Doggs" and "Dudes of Uterus".
The catch is, the doors open into the same large room where there's a keg, a cat on the toilet with a glass pipe, and everyone having a party. The real bathrooms are too crass to have out in the open, and will only be spoken of in hushed tones. They'll be decorated in a Keenspot motif.
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One of my more tragic college discoveries was that a pony keg doesn't keep - even if you refrigerate it. I had visions of tapping a cold one at will for weeks on end, but within 3 days it had turned vile. Turns out the standard pump pressurizer that you get with a keg you buy for a party just pumps regular old oxygen containing room air into your jug of delight, rapidly oxidizing the delicious malt flavors into cardboardiness. Now, these many years later, I've got a CO2 pressurizing system for my homebrew kegs, and my dreams of at-will draft beer have been realized.
Did your generation not have the kegerator? The kegerator allows one to keep the keg in a fridged box with a C02 pump that lasts basically forever. My old dorm knew no other way to keep beer.
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We considered ourselves fortunate if the rooms were equipped with four functioning light bulbs.
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The only dorm I spent any time in, I was happy if there was somewhere soft for me to pass out on.
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My dorm was one of the grossest places ever when we got done with it. I was able to pick a years worth of trash up in like 5 hours though, since it was so tiny. I don't really know why that happened, generally my place is at least kind of clean, but whatever.
I did not drink at all my freshman year. Like, I literally drank alcohol less than 5 times after the first week. I have no idea why. I drank pretty heavily in High School, started drinking again quickly sophomore year, and kept up (increased) some other well publicized habits that I have, but I didn't drink. I got the lowest grades of my college career, but I didn't party. I just stayed outside smoking cigarettes with like 6 or 7 good friends and played this game we invented called two square until like 7 am, when we could buy milk and cereal to feast on before bed. Also, I lived less than a block from the baseball field that they kept unlocked, we would just play random stoned games in there for hours. One time I stole a wooden bat, but have since lost it.
Also, we would go to this lake and sit on a dock in the middle of it nearly every night. This was about 30 minutes away from Pauls Valley, OK, so it is very rural area. The skies were very nice.
I think I was a lot happier then, before 3 years of horrible stressed out collegeness (or now that I read this post again, perhaps because the people I knew that year are all out of my life; one committed suicide, three failed out before Junior year, one was a foreign exchange student from England and a couple I just don't see as much because of Things). I am sorry that I am an asshole on here sometimes. I think it has a lot to do with a) heavy drinking and b) I am so ready to be out of college that it has just become this horrible purgatory like place, but I am starting to see the rainbow that is graduating in December and getting the hell out of Oklahoma, at least for a while (which kind of actually makes this worse). I am going to Boulder one month this summer and I have only 9 more hours and 6 more upper division hours needed to graduate. I am taking one upper division summer, then next fall it is just work, senior capstone and bowling/soccer/golf/bass, etc.
wow, that went of topic, but I guess I will post.