The OFFICIAL Unofficial Achewood Message Board
Trivial Pursuits => Wild Card => Topic started by: Choop on November 24, 2003, 06:38:13 am
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I'll be in Vegas with mrs|Choop over THXGVG wkend, so I want you all to behave yourselves, capisce? It's not that I think you won't; I just want to make sure my übermods appreciate the fact that I'm not leaving for a while without a goodbye.
Have fun, stay nice, and behave, at least between Thursday and Monday, when I'm completely offline.
If anyone wants to give me money with which to gamble, donate it to this board instead.
Take it from me, I Love You!
edit for lack of remaining need for stickiness
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Alright, I promise not to start any fires here while you're gone.
Just go easy on the shrimp at the buffet, OK?
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Yeah, 2nd on the shrimp. My rule of thumb is that if you can see more than 2 colors (preferably pink and orange) leave the shrimp be.
There is no such thing as "Rainbow Shrimp". Even in Chinatown.
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Unless if you're going to the buffet at the Bellagio. Their shrimp are just fine. As are their desserts.
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The Bellagio is all done out in class. It's one of the few places in Vegas that is.
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It would appear (http://www.achewood.com/index.php?date=05092003) that Ray concurs.
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Not enough work to do today, August? Trying to avoid the family?
I mean, there's free time and then there's TOO MUCH free time.
Get a grip, man.
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Bite me, pally.
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Planned meals:
Thursday, Drai's at the Barbary Coast.
Friday, Seafood Buffet at Rio.
Saturday, Picasso at ...Bellagio.
Yes, folks, I'm all covered on the eating front. Now, I just have to master counting a five-deck blackjack deal without mid-shoe entries. In three days.
Wish me luck!
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Just go back to your cumcumber sandwiches, Jough.
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Yes, folks, I'm all covered on the eating front. Now, I just have to master counting a five-deck blackjack deal without mid-shoe entries. In three days.
Card-counting! Represent!
Anyway, g'luck. Don't lose the house or anything.
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Saturday, Picasso at ...Bellagio.
Post a Picasso review here, please. I've been curious about that place for a while, but never actually abused my plastic there.
And good luck with the blackjack. Table play's usually too intimidating for me. You'll probably find me playing video 21 on the Odyssey machines at Excalibur, you know, the ones over by the pay phones?
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I'm a craps man. It's all about yelling "yo!"
Although I avoided the Bellagio when playing since their minimums were higher.
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Heh. I'm going to Vegas right after Thanksgiving. However, we will have a six-month-old in tow. I don't expect to eat at Picasso.
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It is never too early to teach your six month old to stuff bills into a sexy lady's g-string.
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...as long as you also teach him where not to tuck the money first (http://www.achewood.com/index.php?date=12192002)
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Except that my six-month-old is a girl.
If she wants to tuck money into sexy ladies' G-strings somewhere down the road, hey, nothing wrong with that. But I think I'll let her decide that on her own, thanks.
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Aw, man, don't deny her hot girl-girl action just because she's only six months old.
And I know she's your daughter, but think about how hot it would be for your friends? All you selgiraffe people always thinkin' solely about yourselves and the well-being of your children. Pffft.
You will never be 'rad' with that attitude.
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I go away from the board for like two days and this happens.
I'm proud of you people! Proud!
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I'm back, baby! And not a moment too soon. I didn't lose more than I could afford to, though I did hit a couple SNAFUs with my credit card. But that's not for you to worry your pretty little heads about.
Turns out? The wife's an expert at blackjack. Yeah. And? She doesn't like to play it. She'd rather lose at slots than win at blackjack. Oh, well. No diamond for X-mas for somebody here.
THIS JUST IN: Don't let me gamble. I'll just lose it all.
You seem to have had some fun without me, and thanks for being have.
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Did you make it to Picasso?
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YOU BET I DID!
Sorry, I forgot I was going to post a review. Here we go!
At Picasso, they offer two styles of dining: "Prix Fixe" and "Degustation," which is really just a different prix fixe menu, and another ten bucks. The Prix Fixe offers one of three choices for the first three courses, and your choice of several desserts; the Degustation offers four preset courses, then one of two choices for the entree, followed by the same dessert system. Both are available with paired wines for about half the price of the dinner extra. Before your order is taken, though, you are presented with an "amuse bouche" (or however that's spelled). Now I shall, as they say, "break it down a touch further."
The missus and I began our anniversary dinner with a lovely glass of champagne, during our enjoyment of which came the amuse bouche - a pheasant croquette with a touch of tomato sauce. Extravagant! I opted for the Prix Fixe, with mrs|Choop volunteering for the Degustation menu. Our appetizers arrived: mine was a quail salad, lovely and fatty small fowl with bitter greens and artichoke prepared better than I've ever had before; my dear lady's was a georgeous crab lump cake, the second best of all the crab cakes we've sampled: light, creamy, almost no breading or filler.
Course two! By now we've got real wine, not just champagne, but a lovely sharp Chardonnay for her, and a nice dry and spicy Zinfandel (not white zin! for shame!) for moi. The server brings to my love her sauteed scallops over some of the finest mashed potatoes in all of the country. I've got now a seafood boudin, a small sausage containing lobster, crab, scallops, and shrimp. With this comes a mild sauce tasting of poblano, tomato, and basil. Extraordinary.
Course the third! I've only got the one more course, which will be discussed later, but my sweetheart has an extra interjection here of seared foie gras. Never before have I had foie gras. Never again will I understand why I never before had foie gras. This is the single best part of the meal: it's soft, it's rich and fatty, and it disappears in about forty-five seconds. Yes, she was kind enough to share with me.
Entree! Entree pour vous! Lamb for the lady, and deer for me. Her chop is lovely, cooked just to medium, and accompanied by some vegetables of some sort. However, I have no recollection of its taste: blown away by the foie gras, I taste the venison medallions on my plate and am reassembled. There are few enough vegetables on my plate as to be nearly laughable; still, each is expertly prepared, and what I thought at first glance was potato turned to apple in my mouth. Lovely! Woodsy! Not gamey in the least.
Dessert was perhaps the weakest point of the meal, except for the coffee and the post-dinner liqueur I tasted. Complex, tasting of coffee, chocolate, vanilla, raspberry, tart cherry, spinach, vodka, and citrus, it had been aged over thirty years and breathed for five minutes before it came to me. I only wish I could remember the name of it: I've got the vintage.
All in all, especially considering the credit card snafu (about which our waiter was especially kind and understanding) this was perhaps the finest meal of our lives. It's at least in the top three, and that's saying something. Five stars out of four!
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Oh, snap!
Alright, guess I know where's I'm taking the lady next time. Thanks Choop!
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Sounds great, Choop. I usually hit the seedier parts of the city, home of the cheap-ass buffets and usually with naked chicks dancing on top of the tables, but that sounds incredible.
I'll have to check out Picasso next time I'm in town with a special lady.
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Oh, don't get me wrong, we hit downtown too for the $.99 shrimp cocktail at the Golden Gate, then played some $3 blackjack and hit the "Loosest Slots in Vegas" at one of those... Binion's hossshoe, maybe?
We kind of had to after blowing our wad at Picasso and Drai's (which also rocked the casbah).
Also on the good side, our winnings bought us tickets to see the Blue Man Group, and bought me some mackin' shades and shoes.
And we brought home the Croupe, or Strep, or Bronchitis, or some shit which means extra days off which are filled with hacking up lung and sleeping in a NyQuil daze. Yay us.
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Oh, don't get me wrong, we hit downtown too for the $.99 shrimp cocktail at the Golden Gate, then played some $3 blackjack and hit the "Loosest Slots in Vegas" at one of those... Binion's hossshoe, maybe?
Good business is where you find it - Clarence Boddicker
My one and only trip to Vegas was not classy in the least. We drank heavily and played penny slots all day, because the sort of people who fan their hands at a video slot depiction of a parrot squawking, in his sorry little coin-op way, please do not let me falter and fall into the pot of boiling water and lose you those precious bonus credits - these are people that have the Most Fascinating Life Stories Ever, and the best anyone can ever do is sit and guzzle and empathize and extrapolate.
Also penny slots make you look busy, and busy = cocktails. Classy is fuck*ng boring. I challenge Iron Chef Italian, and the theme ingredient is Backyard Wrestling DVD 2-packs.
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I challenge Iron Chef Italian, and the theme ingredient is Backyard Wrestling DVD 2-packs.
Zartan, will you marry me?
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I challenge Iron Chef Italian, and the theme ingredient is Backyard Wrestling DVD 2-packs.
Zartan, will you marry me?
YOU DON'T WANT NONE OF THIS
You don't understand. I am a weak man. Every time I go to Best Buy I pick these fuck*ng DVDs up and examine them as though I intend to purchase them. I like wrestling and I dislike teenagers and my enjoyment of a multimedia presentation of teenagers getting spectacularly injured seems a Foregone Conclusion. But I will not give them my money; they will blow it on fuzzy black light posters and Insane Clown Posse concert tickets.
So in conclusion meet me at 11:30 PM and bring a ladder and sturdy shoes.
EDIT: I had originally misspelled "multimedia" as "mulitmedia" which is also, phonetically, correct.
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http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/B0000DIJOW/
edit: side-scrolling rar! no! no! amazon links always have too much crap in them.
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Ric Flair lives in my city. I see him at hockey games sometimes. He howls when then home team scores a goal.
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I have a frien who recently won the tag-team title belt in his indie wrestling league. I believe they are a cut above your average backyard wrestlers, given as my friend has done this for several years and has yet to contract tetanus, but I still wasn't sure what to say about the occasion. Do you congratulate someone for this?
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You must make sure their music plays whenever they enter or leave an area. Chanting their name is also expected.
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Duly noted. I'll get the boom box and groupies.
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Duly noted. I'll get the boom box and groupies.
Make sure that the groupies realize that you are referring to a wrestling tag team, as opposed to Tag Team, the Atlanta superstars that brought us such compelling smash hits as Whoomp! (There It Is) and Addams Family (Whoomp) - the latter of which was on the goddamned in-house music when I had that toy store job in the mall.
Over and over again.
Whoomp! Addams Fam-uh-lee
For my masters thesis I am going to track down every single remix of Whoomp! (There It Is) and well that's about it really, I sort of coast on charm
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I sort of coast on charm
The scary thing... It even comes across in writing.
Hell, I'm so charmed I want to read the thesis, despite not actually knowing anything of this Whoomp malarky.
I'm guessing that, too, is a good thing.
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The entire idea of a thesis based on all the different remixes of "Whoomp!" gives me a warm and fuzzy. It reminds me of PCU, which was not precisely a good movie, but...
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despite not actually knowing anything of this Whoomp malarky.
Never suggest that you might be uninformed to someone who works reference. I will give you the information:
Did you know that a Google image search for "Whoomp! (There It Is)" retrieves, as its second most relevant result, a picture of a man holding his own dick? Hey, good job, guy! Why yes, it is hosted on Geocities!
Did you know that Tag Team actually resorted to ripping themselves off, releasing no less than five unloved "sequels" to "Whoomp! (There It Is)"?
Um, that's about as far as I got. I guess there's not a lot of overlap between "people with websites" and "people who still listen to fuck*ng Tag Team in this day and age"
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::raises hand::
I have that mp3. But only for humor value, I swear. Like Vanilla Ice or the A-Team music.
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There's a party over here
a party over there
Wave your hands in the air
Shake the deriere
These three words mean you're gettin' busy
Whoomp there it is
whoomp there it is
<><><><><>
How is that not four words?
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I have that mp3. But only for humor value, I swear. Like Vanilla Ice or the A-Team music.
OK. The ATeam music is humour value, Vanilla Ice is just the Satanic, ripping pain that sears through your flesh as your soul is torn from your flaccid, eviscerated body.
No excuses...
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PITCHERS! (http://www.10mar2001.com/images/vegas2003/)
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Choop, you look exactly as I would expect.
That last photo showing gigantic balls is particularly nice.
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Wow, Choop, you look oddly familiar. I think you must look like someone I used to know, but can't place.
Jough's right about the gigantic balls. Jee-hosephat.
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Wait... Are you the blonde one or the guy who looks like a 7 foot tall Elvis?
I'm confused!
No, I agree with JL, that you look familiar for some reason.
I'm beginning to think you're just one of those guys who looks familiar to people who've never met you.
Hey, it happens...
Oh, and is that some woman who gets paid to sit atop gigantic balls all day? Or did they cheap out and get a fake?
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Choop looks like what would happen if one of the guys I knew in high school cleaned up his act when he grew up. This is all.
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I'm the blond guy. Apparently a lot of people think they've seen me before, though, even this one bartender in the Bellagio.
Me: "Hey, how are ya. How 'bout a--"
Him: "Hey, man! How you doin'! How the f*ck you been!?"
Me: "Uh... fine, winning, and you?"
Him: "Been good man. It's been a long time, huh!"
Me: [stares, confused]
Him: "This ain't your first time here, is it?"
Me: "Yeah, sure is."
Him: "Oh, I coulda sworn I knew you." [walks away]
Me: "...bloody mary?"
Yes, he pronounced the asterisk in f*ck. I didn't even know it was possible.
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Yes, he pronounced the asterisk in f*ck. I didn't even know it was possible.
I get that, but only when I'm with one particular friend of mine.
It's like collective familiarity.
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Yes, he pronounced the asterisk in f*ck. I didn't even know it was possible.
I like how on Boxes of Pornography they will actually use this demure, asterisk-enabled variation on One Of My Very Favorite Words, all the while proudly displaying in overexposed glossy people who can't even do algebra putting Moist Things Into Moist Holes, etc.
It really adds that touch of class to any prospective rental / purchase that you just can't buy for any price.
EDIT: I always thought it was pronounced fsssk or alternatively, depending on the company, fnnnnk, that last batch of consonants like a straining stutterer
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I like how on Boxes of Pornography they will actually use this demure, asterisk-enabled variation on One Of My Very Favorite Words, all the while proudly displaying in overexposed glossy people who can't even do algebra putting Moist Things Into Moist Holes, etc.
It took me a minute to fully parse "Boxes of Pornography"; my first image was a sort of large, immaculately-labelled file box, such as might be found in a suburban home office or study, stuffed with porn of all flavors.
I think I like my initial image better.
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I like how on Boxes of Pornography...
There's nothing on this earth like a man who knows his porn.
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My own Vegas trip is now completed as well. Didn't eat at anywhere so nice as Picasso; having a six-month old puts a damper on that kind of thing. But the buffet at Paris is fuck*ng awesome, at breakfast time anyway.
Our baby is so freaking cute. Seemed like everyone in Vegas freaked out over her.
Gambling did not go well. Here was the pattern at blackjack: win two hands, bump my bet up a little, double down to a 20, then the dealer would turn over 12-16 and draw to 21. I swear that happened a half-dozen times.
I did play poker, though, and it was crazy fun. On the second hand, I got pocket aces, and went on to win a $30-ish pot (this was a $1-$3 table). "I LIKE poker," I said. I was up $40 at one point, then got too cocky and bet too aggressively. Still, I finished ahead, and got valuable experience for next time.
Full report to come on my blog later in the week.
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I'm headed to Vegas this weekend. Good to know what works and what doesn't.
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My much too long and detailed Vegas trip summary is up.
http://www.bigfool.com/vegas_03.htm
If you're expecting tales of hookers and debauchery, skip it.
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If you're expecting tales of hookers and debauchery, skip it.
Not from anyone on this forum no...
It is like a mundane version of Fear and Loathing. I quite like it!
I have to wonder about you calling your kid Bean though. Is it evil or just what you call her online?
I guess it depends on surname. And I'm not one to talk!
Anyway, sounded like good stuff. I hope to do Vegas sometime, in a Cadillac with lots of drugs...
But then I want to see New Zealand and South America, and China and Tibet, and go to Japan, and see Ankhor Watt, and loads of other stunning places. So it's all about priorities I guess.
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"Bean" is just a nickname. Early in the pregnancy, we read something on Baby Center which said "At the moment, she's the size of a lima bean." So she became "our lima bean," which evolved into just Bean.
Lately I've been calling her Lizard, but that didn't seem quite as nice for the Vegas story.
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Just to chime in: what a cute baby!
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Cute indeed. That shot of her sleeping on the bed was priceless. Nice pink hat, too.
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Shucky darn and slop the hogs, you weren't kidding about those rodeo finals. The Flamingo felt like Urban Cowboy on acid this weekend.
Or something else...cowboy-related...on, er, acid.
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Nothing like a tropical paradise complete with bales of hay and a big plastic cow, eh?
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Nothing like a tropical paradise complete with bales of hay and a big plastic cow, eh?
No shit. Also, men with stunning satin jackets from Ralston's Cattle Supplies, escorting faaaaahn ladies in their multi-colored lamb-fleece coats. It was great to just sit back and spectate.*
* A new verb I picked up from a guy at the craps table: "Are you playing?" "No, I'm just spectatin.'" Excellent.
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Bales of hay can class up anything (http://mywebpage.netscape.com/zartan00001/balesofhay.JPG), probably exponentially.
The standard one million internet dollars to the person who correctly figures out where I found this Ph.D in cortex-withering charisma. And no, sweet Jesus, before you even think it, it's not me. Have some dignity.
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(http://www.koit.pwp.blueyonder.co.uk/hay.jpg)
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Bales of hay can class up anything (http://mywebpage.netscape.com/zartan00001/balesofhay.JPG), probably exponentially.
The standard one million internet dollars to the person who correctly figures out where I found this Ph.D in cortex-withering charisma. And no, sweet Jesus, before you even think it, it's not me. Have some dignity.
I dunno - the attitude says "smooth," but the shorts say "cheese."
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(http://www.koit.pwp.blueyonder.co.uk/hay.jpg)
Ha ha ha ha! Nice!
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Say! Isn't that noted XFL standout "He Hate Me"?
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Say! Isn't that noted XFL standout "He Hate Me"?
On some level it karmically horrifies me that August can name "noted XFL standouts" -- or, at least one of them, anyway. How many sins can one man commit in one lifetime to have such information forced upon him?
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I am just chock full of wonderous knowledge.
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Say! Isn't that noted XFL standout "He Hate Me"?
On some level it karmically horrifies me that August can name "noted XFL standouts" -- or, at least one of them, anyway. How many sins can one man commit in one lifetime to have such information forced upon him?
what should really horrify you is that there supposedly are (were?) any "noted XFL standouts."
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what should really horrify you is that there supposedly are (were?) any "noted XFL standouts."
I was going with the "ruby in the rubbish" idea, similar to that used to isolate boddhisatvas: that nobody is much good, but someone has to be the best anyway.
Still, I'm not thinking about this anymore. Really.
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(http://www.koit.pwp.blueyonder.co.uk/hay.jpg)
Goddammit now, that's a pun.
~Paul
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I was going with the "ruby in the rubbish" idea, similar to that used to isolate boddhisatvas: that nobody is much good, but someone has to be the best anyway.
As a deputized agent of the Monkey King, Great Sage, Equal of Heaven, I am telling you right now that this is the greatest sentence ever virtually uttered in even the vaguest reference to the XFL.
Yes this includes all that nonsense talk about smashmouth football and dating cheerleaders and talking with curses into a helmet-mounted microphone
(Note: I am a person that read John Madden's Authorized Grill-Oriented Cookbook and it all sounds really good if more than a little lifespan denting and saturated fat fetishy [and therefore impossible], and so but I am a fully epauletted expert on the whole smashing of mouths / talking all kinds of carnivorous blurfy aesthetic.)
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That He Hate Me.
He's a gutty player. He's gritty. He just wanted it more. He plays with authority. He finds a way (to win). His head is in the game. He is there, now. He leaves everything on the field. When he hits you, you know you've been hit. He's All-Madden. He wants to play another one. He's a player's player. He's the hardest workin' man in football. He goes the extra mile. His feet never stop moving. He's the last to leave the weight room. He's on another level. He's a pro-bowler. He finds a way into the end zone. He's not afraid to get hit. He'll run routes across the middle. He wants the ball at crunch time. He's the next (Thorpe, Hirsch, Hornung, Brown, Simpson, Payton, Sanders). He's concensus. He's prime time, baby.
How I hate him.
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He's a gutty player.
That one bit just made me hear - "Grutty Peen. Armpitutty..."
Now I have the whole thing going through my head.
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He's a gutty player.
That one bit just made me hear - "Grutty Peen. Armpitutty..."
Now I have the whole thing going through my head.
That's OK. For me, this one
He's a pro-bowler.
originally scanned as "He is a professional bowler", not "He is of sufficient quality to participate in the Pro Bowl."
I liked mine better...
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I thought it meant that he was for hats.
FREE HAT
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Ooh ooh ooh, I remembered something Achewood-related from my Vegas trip!
You may recall that back when Ray's Place was part of the regular site, I wrote in asking what Ray did while in Vegas, and he replied in the column (http://www.achewood.com/raysplace.php?date=08192003&allnav=). Including:
But hell, I’m no snob. Sometimes I’ll just go nurse a couple airplane bottles of fig vodka down at the Stage Door (across from the off-strip entrance to Bally’s). They have a pretty good deal on hot dogs there, and you can just zone out on quarter video poker right at your seat.
I had forgotten this, but in the cab leaving the hotel to go back to the airport, what should we drive by but the Stage Door Casino, Deli & Convenience Store. Big marquee out front, Hot Dogs 2 for 99 Cents or the like. I almost wanted to stop. It definitely looks like a good spot to go slumming while drunk at 3 AM.