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Trivial Pursuits => History => Topic started by: miles on September 28, 2009, 04:48:48 am

Title: William Safire Dead At 79
Post by: miles on September 28, 2009, 04:48:48 am
William Safire, ever vigilant guardian of the English language (http://www.theonion.com/content/node/31525), dies at age 79 (http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=113255309&ps=cprs).

Who will protect our language now?
Title: Re: William Safire Dead At 79
Post by: Bobby Isosceles on September 28, 2009, 01:51:26 pm
Quote from: miles on September 28, 2009, 04:48:48 am
William Safire, ever vigilant guardian of the English language (http://www.theonion.com/content/node/31525), dies at age 79 (http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=113255309&ps=cprs).

Who will protect our language now?

We must disinter the bones of Pāṇini, grind them into a paste, sprinkle them with the blood of a hundred rappers, and burn failed attempts at prescriptivism in effigy (the later books of the Avesta, or any text in Katharevousa Greek).

Pāṇini's spirit will return to this plane and protect us.
Title: Re: William Safire Dead At 79
Post by: Dexter on September 28, 2009, 10:15:39 pm
Quote from: Bobby Isosceles on September 28, 2009, 01:51:26 pm
the blood of a hundred rappers
Now, are we talking all their blood, or just a few drops from each?  It seems like the former might be harder to come by.
Title: Re: William Safire Dead At 79
Post by: jaydub on September 28, 2009, 11:08:51 pm
If its the latter, we can just put out a video extolling the joys of Cristal, spinny-wheels, chrome-barreled 9's, and necklaces of little vials with your DNA code in it (send blood sample to PO box with a blunt and some '40 screw caps as proof of legitness)