The OFFICIAL Unofficial Achewood Message Board
Achewood => Achewood => Topic started by: AugustWest on December 04, 2003, 08:06:59 pm
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Very nice. Onstad provides us infinitely more insight into Beef's character with this look at this turbulent childhood. We learn a lot about Ray here, too.
The writing is poignant and touching. I'm getting all teary eyed for li'l Beef, who's all sincere and cowed and nervous and it's all afterschool specially and li'l Ray's all understanding and observant and concerned about his friend and then BANG! he puts a Whoopee cushion on his chair.
A Whoopee cushion. That dang ol' Ray. He's incorrigible.
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We knew Beef's current home is much smaller than Ray's but apparently it's always been that way. Poor Beef.
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How heartbreaking. And on the same day that we hear that Philippe has hurt his toe. Can we endure any more?
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And where's Ray's Daddy through all this. We've heard quite a bit about his Mom -- didn't Ray every know his father?
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Oh, come on. You know Ray's daddy was a total playa.
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Well, yeah, but did Ray ever know him? Surely there are some funny/painful stories to be savored from that relationship.
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I just realized something. The whole bathroom thing with Beef sounded like a lot for anybody to do, but I just realized that Beef is covered with fur. That's insane.
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Oh, come on. You know Ray's daddy was a total playa.
Papa was a rollin' stone. *sniff*
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rollin stone gathers no moss.
really I think onstad is just saving it.
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And where's Ray's Daddy through all this. We've heard quite a bit about his Mom -- didn't Ray every know his father?
Cats don't do fathers. Besides that, when a female cat gets her bone on, it's usually pretty much a case of -take a number fellas and get in line.
~Paul
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Cats don't do fathers. Besides that, when a female cat gets her bone on, it's usually pretty much a case of -take a number fellas and get in line.
~Paul
Well, there is a little more genetic protection there...
Since cat c*ckes are barbed it means that the male will be connected for a little longer than usual, and the female may be a, little averse to getting amd rutty so soon after.
Thus, in the underworld, a cat is far more likely, by default, to know who the father is than we.
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Since cat c*ckes are barbed
YOU HAVE SINGLE-HANDEDLY USHERED IN A NEW SENSIBILITY FOR AND / OR ABOUT THIS MESSAGE BOARD
A+++ WOULD BUY FROM AGAIN
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That would explain those crazy noises they make in the midst of sweet sweetness.
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I wish mine was...
Did I say that out l...
Fuck...
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OW.
I hate this thread.
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Cats have nothing on foxes...
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OW.
I hate this thread.
As well you should.
I was like, BONE... BONE... BONE... (http://www.cfainc.org/jpgs/repro8-1.jpg)
While hardly the Nazi Death Fuck Device I'd been envisioning - think Giger gone giraffein' - I still wouldn't put this anywhere soft. IT DEPRECIATES THE MOMENT YOU DRIVE IT OFF THE LOT, PEOPLE
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Science invented the shovel. St. Zartan invented the new low.
And we salute you.
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I was like, BONE... BONE... BONE... (http://www.cfainc.org/jpgs/repro8-1.jpg)
Can't finish this post, my eyeballs are trying to wrench themselves out of my head.
I'll let my ten-month-old daughter do it:
kk b.g..?; b mmv b b mmmmmmmmmmmm,8bv m gg/
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Anyone who still has an internet crush on this fellow, I officially hate you.
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Aha! Ribbed for her pleasure.
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See. I just brought it to your attention. I wasn't responsible for that.
Hey, wait. Who the fuck was responsible for that?
I mean, it's like that line in Clerks - "That's why I manually masturbate caged monkeys for artificial insemination".
May have been animals. But you know...
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See. I just brought it to your attention. I wasn't responsible for that.
Hey, wait. Who the fuck was responsible for that?
Who, indeed. Welcome to the Creation / Evolution debate.
On the one hand, no loving God would create a truly wicked phallus like that. Ho ho ho, spilling over with empathy for all my creations, especially those with a pesky case of shredded uterus.
On the other hand, what are the odds that a series of symmetrical and vile barbs would just somehow spontaneously appear on the prick of any life form? Is it that much of a genetic advantage? If not, should I be personally offended by their absence on my own?
The only logical conclusion is that you, yes you, are living in a work of fiction, and this particular Fact of Life was presented evidence-free in order to gauge your response / influence your future behaviour. Good luck!
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The only logical conclusion is that you, yes you, are living in a work of fiction, and this particular Fact of Life was presented evidence-free in order to gauge your response / influence your future behaviour. Good luck!
Nice!
Although, well, I kind of answered that question by my introduction of the barbed c*ck comment.
What I meant was, who the fuk takes a picture of an erect, cat's c*ck?!?
Hence my Clerks quote. I can't see what other kind of person would do it.
That's kind of a lie actually.
I'm sure the sort of people how don't go out because they are scared of eyes might do this sort of thing.
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I'm sure the sort of people how don't go out because they are scared of eyes might do this sort of thing.
Yeah, them and those inscrutable veterinarians.
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Yeah, them and those inscrutable veterinarians.
Yea, but, they don't know how to use the internet surely?
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Hence my Clerks quote.
Don't suck any barbed dicks on the way through the parking lot!
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Street Zardoz, I'm a little impressed that you were able to stimulate your cat to the point of erection like that.
WAY TO GO, PERVERT
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This thread seems to have taken...a turn.