The OFFICIAL Unofficial Achewood Message Board
Trivial Pursuits => Sports & Leisure => Topic started by: St_Zartan on December 21, 2003, 11:46:49 am
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Maybe rapists sleep at the Super 8 after pushing their Ford Pintos back from Arby's.
I'm starting to think that I'm the only person on the face of the Earth who doesn't think of Arby's as some sort of despicable hell-pit. There's probably a sound reason for this, but it is severely off-topic.
The reason you do not dislike Arby's is because their sandwiches are thick and juicy and flavorful. And do not even get me started on the curly fries. My only complaint about Arby's is that the nearest one is like, forty-five minutes away, so whenever I am fated to be in that neck of the woods, I always end up making a complete pig of myself and feeling just vile for about three hours afterwards.
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Every single time I eat something from Arby's my stomach gets upset and I have to lie down. That never happens at any other fast food places.
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You must not forget the Jamocha shake. I don't care how stupid the name is, it is the most beautiful "partially gelatinous gum-based beverage"* one can find. My childhood provided scores of happy memories of junior roast beef sandwiches and shakes....
No wonder I'm such a fat bastard.
*apologies if this isn't 100% accurate, I'm doing it from memory and I haven't had any coffee yet this morning.
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Arby's is nasty. Pre-processed roast beef loaf that's only +/- 1% sawdust per ounce. Blecch. Which doesn't mean that I don't wind up eating there a few times a year, but that's only because of the wife person.
There's a chain on the East Coast called Roy Rogers that kicks the collective ass of Arby's seven ways to Sunday. Or at least it did back in the 80s.
Those green remembered hills...
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All I really have to say about this topic: I like Arby's. I like roast beef sandwiches, and Arby's's (... er... those sandwiches which are from Arby's, to clarify) have given me nothing to complain about. My condolences to those who have had poor Arby's-related experiences.
I've eaten at Roy Rogers once or twice. It didn't really impress me either way.
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There's a chain on the East Coast called Roy Rogers that kicks the collective ass of Arby's seven ways to Sunday. Or at least it did back in the 80s.
I'm fairly certain that Roy's didn't start selling roast beef until they merged with Hardee's. Prior to that they were burgers and fried chicken.
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Roy Rogers' is my favourite fast food place of all time, next to Gino's.
Anyway, they're all but gone from these parts, but they used to have this "Fixin's Bar" where you could just LOAD UP on lettuce, tomato, onions, pickels, etc. and make essentially a salad burger.
And when I was a kid I had this little "Buckaroo Card" which enabled me to get a free soft drink with any sandwich purchase. I think it was good until I was 12 years old, and I remember using it once after I was 12 and feeling really guilty and afraid that they'd catch/card me.
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Roy Rogers' is my favourite fast food place of all time, next to Gino's.
Anyway, they're all but gone from these parts, but they used to have this "Fixin's Bar" where you could just LOAD UP on lettuce, tomato, onions, pickels, etc. and make essentially a salad burger.
Dude. And the Double-R-Bar Burger! A cheeseburger with sliced ham on top of the patty. Throw a pile of pickles on at the Fixin's Bar and turn into a pillar of salt before you're done eating!
Actually, I must have blocked this out: I found one on the 95 in either southern Pennsylvania or Maryland when I was back east in October. I made it through one bite of my Double-R-Bar and threw it away. It made Sbarro's seem appetizing.
Memories, misty watercolor mem-- alright, I'll stop.
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Curly fries kick ass. And those "Market Fresh" sandwiches, on multi-grain bread, aren't half-bad.
Weird Arby's experience some years ago: I get up to the register and place my order, which includes curly fries. A girl from the back comes up and says to the girl at the register, "I told you we were out of curly fries." "What!?" I ask. "Well, I'd have to make them," says fry cook girl.
"What, you mean like peel the potatoes and stuff?"
"No, they come in a bag."
I turned around and announced to everyone waiting in line (a couple hours before closing time), "Sorry folks, they're all out of food and DON'T FEEL LIKE MAKING ANY MORE."
I got my curly fries.
(And yes, they were girls, high school girls, not womyn.)
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I got my curly fries.
And what's more, you also got the USRDA of both phlegm AND saliva!
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With all due respect, Carlos, you probably got somebody's LiveJournal nastygram of the day -- and you may very well have deserved it. My first thought on that matter is that fry-cook girl was pointing it out not because she didn't want to make the fries but because, if she didn't make it clear that they were out and had to make more, everyone who had ordered curly fries would have been bitching at the poor girl on the register about WHERE THE HELL ARE THEIR CURLY FRIES, THEY ORDERED TEN MINUTES AGO, DAMMIT?!
(Yes, I have a friend in food service. Sometimes it shows.)
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A cheeseburger with sliced ham on top of the patty.
Well, that's just appalling. I was stricken with an attack of "Can they DO that??" upon reading that post.
And I'd concur with V-Adore regarding the curly-fry incident. Being a teenagey type, I have a LOT of friends in the "fast food industry" (which makes it sound like some sort of dirty euphemism, but alas no), including one who works at New York Fries. Apparently fry work is not nice work.
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Well, that's just appalling.
No, that's just yummy-numptious. Or at least, it was at one point.
Besides, I'm glad I don't have access to such a thing these days, given that am I what is known in the parlance of our times as a "fat fuck."
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Well, that's just appalling.
No, that's just yummy-numptious. Or at least, it was at one point.
Besides, I'm glad I don't have access to such a thing these days, given that am I what is known in the parlance of our times as a "fat fuck."
This is the same reason why it is for the best that I no longer live in my old home-town: Now I don't have access to Crown Burger (http://utah.citysearch.com/profile/11362720/?context=restaurants). If ham on a burger is good, pastrami on a buger is as near orgasmic as I could want my food to be.
And their shakes and fries kick ass, too.
Time to stop thinking about this, I'm drooling....
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Now I'm flashing back to the Gusburger eating contest from school. That's a burger "all the way" with a fried egg on top.
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Top Bun
Mayo
Ketchup/Catsup
Deli Mustard
Relish ( != Pickle )
2 rings Red Onion
1 slice Tomato
1 leaf Lettuce
Cheddar Cheese (shredded or 1 slice)
1 slice Ham
2/3 lb. (pre-cooked weight) Ground Beef
Barbecue Sauce
Bottom Bun
That, followed vertically, is the construction of the Perfect Burger, available here in Atlanta at the Vortex Bar & Grill, home of the 2nd best burger in town. To find the best burger in town, and the 2nd best burger in the country, visit me and I shall deliver it unto you.
Three cheers for Ham+Burgers!
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Field trip to Fudruckers!
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If ham on a burger is good, pastrami on a buger is as near orgasmic as I could want my food to be.
PASTRAMI on a BURGER????? That is SO WRONG.
Only in Utah would they think that is a good idea and I speak as a New Yorker whose maternal relations all live in and around Salt Lake City. I am therefore qualified to discuss pastrami, and I also thank heaven every day that my mother married an Italian and learned to cook real food before I was born so I know whereof I speak.
It's not your fault, sj. Obviously you fell in with a bad crowd at a tender and impressionable age. Everyone is entitled to long for the tragic things they ate as a child. But oh... the horror.
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Well, that's just appalling. I was stricken with an attack of "Can they DO that??" upon reading that post.
I thought that about both the ham and the mixing of mayo and ketchup!
Why, Lord, why?
My perfect burger -
Lots of mayo
tomato
lettuce
burger
bun
That's pretty much it.
I'll have other styles sometimes, but I am a mayo addict, and to taint it with other things just doesn't work for me.
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With all due respect, Carlos, you probably got somebody's LiveJournal nastygram of the day -- and you may very well have deserved it.
Well, this was about 1987, so it was before the days of LiveJournal.
And she literally opened a bag and put them in the fryer. It took, like, three minutes.
I know food service can be a pain in the ass, but this was just a lazy-ass high school chick.
Meanwhile, all this burger talk is making me hungry. Anyone ever been to Five Guys in the greater DC area? Mmmmmmmm.... burger.
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White Castle. Represent.
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If ham on a burger is good, pastrami on a buger is as near orgasmic as I could want my food to be.
PASTRAMI on a BURGER????? That is SO WRONG.
Only in Utah would they think that is a good idea and I speak as a New Yorker whose maternal relations all live in and around Salt Lake City. I am therefore qualified to discuss pastrami, and I also thank heaven every day that my mother married an Italian and learned to cook real food before I was born so I know whereof I speak.
It's not your fault, sj. Obviously you fell in with a bad crowd at a tender and impressionable age. Everyone is entitled to long for the tragic things they ate as a child. But oh... the horror.
I'm not claiming that Crown Burgers are 'real food', or even 'good food' for that matter, and most of the time I'd rather eat my own cooking than any fast-food crap. But there is still nothing like a Crown Burger. I can't believe there are (meat-eating) people who don't love this idea, and don't want one right now.
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I thought we were supposed to be connoisseurs in this group. Were starting to sound like a bunch of fast food munching slobs up in here.
Purely by coincidence yesterday I crossed paths with one of the only two Roy Rogers in Houston. They are both long gone now. One has become a bbq joint and the other one, the one I passed yesterday has become a head shop. Houston 420 it's now called. I think I ate there once.
~Paul
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So I guess "In-N-Out Burger" gets no love here?
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Never heard of it.
The other thing is that I see a lot of TV ads for Checkers and for Sonic but have never actually seen either of those two places. Just ads.
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Friends in LA speak of In-and-Out in glowing terms. Alas, we don't have them 'round here, and I have never had the opportunity to visit one.
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So I guess "In-N-Out Burger" gets no love here?
In-N-Out gets much love, but unfortunately has no chains further west than Mesa, AZ.
But if I'm going to recall my Southern California fast food favorites, I'd definitely have to put Tommy's (http://www.originaltommys.com/) on the top of my list. They put this greasy chili on everything. Chili Burgers, to Chili Fries, to Chili Bacon Egg & Cheese Breakfast Sandwiches.
Stellar... Truly stellar...
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CA: Ooo, lookit us with our In-N-Out Burgers and our Blue Ribbon mayo! La la la!
East Coast: Well we have . . . um, Utz and Hellman's! And more minor earthquakes! Word.
Which reminds me, I know Popeye's are rare above the M-D Line but how far west do they reach?
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So I guess "In-N-Out Burger" gets no love here?
It does get plenty of love here in the Southland, although not as much from me lately, owing to the factor mentioned earlier in this thread. A Double-Double is a thing of beauty, especially with grilled onions.
I have friends who have sworn by Tommy's for years, but I avoid them like the plague. I don't like my vittles buried in chili - except for the chili cheese fries at Johnny Rocket's.
The best cheeseburger out here could be found at the Sunset Grill, a hole-in-the-wall next to the Hollywood Guitar Center. There was this little old German guy who just knew what to do with a patty and a slice of cheese. (Don Henley tried to turn the place into a metaphor for American malaise, but it didn't affect the quality of the burgers.) Alas, the guy died a few years ago and they tried to turn it into a respectable establishment, with lousy results.
I'm an editing fool!!
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In-N-Out is fuck*ng wonderful. I've only ever been to the one in Vegas, though - the first time as a Big Lebowski inspired lark, and the second as a this may be the last time I ever ever get to have one of these motherfuck*ng life changing burgers. Good Lord how do they do it
I can't think of any franchises that make Texas special, apart from the fact that every month is Truck Month, which surely counts for something in a non-edible way.
Also - and I have no idea where I originally came up with this - but I was under the impression that Roy Rogers and Arby's were one and the same, having a sort of Exxon / Esso relationship. Perhaps I am just retarded.
INVITATION FOR CHEAP SHOTS, PEOPLE
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Which reminds me, I know Popeye's are rare above the M-D Line but how far west do they reach?
All the way to Santa Monica, baby.
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I can't think of any franchises that make Texas special, apart from the fact that every month is Truck Month, which surely counts for something in a non-edible way.
Is the Big Texan a franchise? Or do they only have the one in Amarillo? I was tempted to try their eat-this-72-ounce-steak-in-less-than-an-hour-and-it's-free deal, except I don't enjoy vomiting.
Someday I'll figure out how to quote multiple posts at the same time.
CHEAP SHOTS STRONGLY DISCOURAGED
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I can't think of any franchises that make Texas special, apart from the fact that every month is Truck Month, which surely counts for something in a non-edible way.
Well, What-A-Burger is a mainly Texas thing, though there are a few outside Texas. I've taken advantage of their 24 hour service on more than one occasion.
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Sidenote: Tried one of them new (for Orange Country SoCal) Johnny Reb's and found it to be about as expected; faux southern roadhouse swank done 'lite'. They do, however, offer sweet-tea.
Thank you for finally clearing that up!
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Is the Big Texan a franchise? Or do they only have the one in Amarillo? I was tempted to try their eat-this-72-ounce-steak-in-less-than-an-hour-and-it's-free deal, except I don't enjoy vomiting.
I think that the whole eat heroically and pay nothing phenomenon is fairly widespread; I remember it being the subject of an episode of the Simpsons. I also think that there is not a man alive, no matter how effete, that hasn't sized up that challenge and thought, at least once: Yeah I could. If I wanted to. Strangely, I have never once in my life heard of the Big Texan, so it may either be local or one of those "let's export culture" franchises. WOW THERE'S A SHIPPING CONTAINER FULL OF DEAD MEXICANS, HONEY WHAT ATMOSPHERE
CHEAP SHOTS STRONGLY DISCOURAGED
DOLLAR SHOTS GREATLY APPRECIATED
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I think that the whole eat heroically and pay nothing phenomenon is fairly widespread; I remember it being the subject of an episode of the Simpsons. I also think that there is not a man alive, no matter how effete, that hasn't sized up that challenge and thought, at least once: Yeah I could. If I wanted to. Strangely, I have never once in my life heard of the Big Texan, so it may either be local or one of those "let's export culture" franchises. WOW THERE'S A SHIPPING CONTAINER FULL OF DEAD MEXICANS, HONEY WHAT ATMOSPHERE
I-40 West from Oklahoma City to Amarillo is lined with billboards touting the Big Texan's quality of dead bovine flesh. Perhaps to lure in unsuspecting dreamers from New Jersey like myself. I contented myself with a burrito. That was back in 1990, so they may well have gone the way of the dodo.
CHEAP SHOTS STRONGLY DISCOURAGED
DOLLAR SHOTS GREATLY APPRECIATED
JELLO SHOTS GET YOU LONG-TIME LOVING, GI JOE
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That's funny. There are a tonne of Checkers and Sonic ads around Philly too, but the closest Checkers to here is in South Jersey (a good 30 minute ride from Philly) and the closest Sonic is in Maryland, nowhere near the Philly market.
So who's the genius who pays for advertising in a market where they don't have any locations?
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Also - and I have no idea where I originally came up with this - but I was under the impression that Roy Rogers and Arby's were one and the same, having a sort of Exxon / Esso relationship. Perhaps I am just retarded.
Roy's merged with Hardee's a few years back. Hardee's being a very Arby's-esque place what with the roast beef sandwiches and all. In the DC area they all changed to Hardee's then they all changed to Roy's. Outside the metro area only Hardee's still exist but they serve Roy's burgers and fried chicken.
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It's gonna be hard to take ya'll seriously when you start writing about gourmet cooking after all this greasy fast food talk.
~Paul
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It's gonna be hard to take ya'll seriously when you start writing about gourmet cooking after all this greasy fast food talk.
Gustatory pleasure is gustatory pleasure. There is a craft and skill to creating something as primally appealing as Fast Food in the somatically obscene and criminally low-rent world of Flesh Processing and Delivery. Admit it - if you had The Recipe for McDonald's Fries, you could peddle it, say fifty cents a shot on PayPal, and still sit rather pretty.
No one medium is any more valid than another, in any sensual respect; if the Ronettes make me as as happy as the Auteurs, who'll split hairs?
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if the Ronettes make me as as happy as the Auteurs, who'll split hairs?
Point taken.
Personally, I veer wildly between pathalogically loathing and obsessively gorging on fast food.
~Paul
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I'm surprised no one mentioned "Chik-Fil-A" because damn they have some tasty pre-processed chicken sandwiches.
I eat at Chik-Fil-A about once every six years, though, because the only one around here is in the mall, which I never really enter anymore.
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Wow, a lot of ground covered here since I last checked this thread. Capsule response time!
In-N-Out: I've been here once, during a Christmas stay in California. It was crowded as hell, but I can understand why, as this was a thoroughly satisfying burger experience.
White Castle: REPRESENT. I've only had a handful of run-ins with White Castles in my life, but all were joy.
Sonic: I went to Sonic a few times in high school; they made a good burger, although not an extraordinary one. They were one of those "drive-in" places that basically did not allow you to order in person even if you came in, which made eating in very odd.
Chik-Fil-A: Why are there not more of these places? They seem to fill a very satisfying market niche, but I think I've eaten at one of these in my life.
On the subject of "obscure and possibly regional burger joints," many of my better recent hamburger experiences have been at one of these. The two that come immediately to mind are both solely Midwestern: Runza, run out of Nebraska and infamous for selling very nice (if very fast-foody) burgers along with their flagship pierogie-like sandwiches, and Culver's, a chain that appears to be entirely about high-quality burgers and delivers.
I was planning to end this post with a long rant about elitism and the great frustration to me caused by those who shun the common simply because it is common, and because a a disdain for the common is generally considered necessary to appreciate better qualities of things, but I sort of lost fervor. Suffice to say that I like hamburgers, refuse to yield my liking of hamburgers to an outside force, and will defend to my dying breath the idea that fast food is a perfectly justified topic of discussion for this forum.
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It took me years to figure out how you were supposed to pronounce "Chik-Fil-A."
It traumatized me so much that I have never eaten there.
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In-N-Out is fuck*ng wonderful. I've only ever been to the one in Vegas, though
There's one in Vegas? Whereabouts? I presume it's not on the Strip or I'd have noticed it.
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I'd never heard of Chik-fil-a until I went to school but since 3 have opened around me. I just hate that they close on Sundays. What kind of fucker closes on Sunday in the food court?
The only burger-specific chains I can think of around here are Fudruckers and Red Robin. And while the unlimited fries at RR sounds good in theory I've never seen anybody actualy ask for more.
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The only burger-specific chains I can think of around here are Fudruckers and Red Robin.
Five Guys, yo. Get thee hence if you've never been. Springfield, Alexandria, others.
http://www.fiveguys.com/images/Locations.html
(http://www.fiveguys.com/images/meal_small.JPG)
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In-N-Out is all Left Coast and Nevada. They're a smallish chain but they serve REAL FOOD. They are to fast food what the ocean is to an aquarium.
http://inandout.com/
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Now see what you've gone and done.
I just finished off a Someburger (scroll down) (http://www.texashiker.com/Texpicks.htm) from God's own hamburger stand. This place is a ten minute walk (or 1 min. drive) from my house and is the last thing I need to be eating. I have been eating here since I was very young, but have avoided the place since I moved back into the neighborhood a few months ago, but all of this burger talk was too much for me and I succumbed to the temptation. OMG it was good. As good as I remember. If I gain 50 pounds this month it's on all your heads.
~Paul
(http://www.paulmcrae.com/images/Miscellany/Misc/DSCN8041-E600.jpg)
(http://www.paulmcrae.com/images/Miscellany/Misc/DSCN8042-E600.jpg)
(http://www.paulmcrae.com/images/Miscellany/Misc/DSCN8043-E600.jpg)
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Those are some hard-core onion rings.
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Dude, that burger looks anemic but those real whole onion rings are a thing of beauty.
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That burger looks entirely acceptable, although not particularly exquisite. Those onion rings... oh. My BASAL NERVOUS SYSTEM wants those onion rings. I can only have a lovely vision of their fries.
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What the hell are those oranges doing in the picture? Surely you aren't eating a nice healthy citrus fruit in combination with that delectable looking burger and rings?
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And what are you drinking with that haul? A big refreshing glass of Coca Cola Classic?
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Those are three beautiful pictures. Thank you.
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What the hell are those oranges doing in the picture? Surely you aren't eating a nice healthy citrus fruit in combination with that delectable looking burger and rings?
I was planning on it for dessert, but after the burger and rings it just didn't seem right. Now if i'd only had a CUNT cream pie*.
And what are you drinking with that haul? A big refreshing glass of Coca Cola Classic?
This is Dr. Pepper country friend.
~Paul
*was planning on posting a picture the worlds greatest CUNT cream pie (also in the neighborhood), but then remembered that I am at my folks house.
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CUNT (http://www.ruralmissouri.org/rmfood/recipes/StrawCrmPie.html)
Cream (http://www.applesforhealth.com/HealthyDesserts/strcrp3.html)Pie. (http://www.cricketscandlecompany.com/CUNT-Cream-Pie-Rufflie-Crust.jpg)
Egad. I had to do some mad Googling to find out what the hell was the deal with that concept. I had never ever encountered such a thing. I am counting my blessings that they have not yet hit rural Ontario, cause man, there'll be like widespread panic and stuff.
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What the hell are those oranges doing in the picture? Surely you aren't eating a nice healthy citrus fruit in combination with that delectable looking burger and rings?
I was planning on it for dessert, but after the burger and rings it just didn't seem right.
My point exactly.
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*was planning on posting a picture the worlds greatest CUNT cream pie (also in the neighborhood), but then remembered that I am at my folks house.
And now i'm home.
(http://www.paulmcrae.com/images/Miscellany/Misc/DSCN7638-E500.JPG)
(http://www.paulmcrae.com/images/Miscellany/Misc/DSCN7640-E500.JPG)
These come from Flying Saucer Pie Company (http://www.flyingsaucerpieshop.com/) which is a Houston institution for the holidays (http://www.b4-u-eat.com/houston/restaurants/reviews/rsv2004.asp)
~Paul
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Went out to eat at Culver's tonight. This place has burgers of God; I had a Wisconsin swiss melt -- very simple, just the bread and cheese and beef and a few onions -- that about blew my mind. If you see a Culver's nearby, eat there. Just do it.
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(And yes, they were girls, high school girls, not womyn.)
Interestingly, pretty much all the Arbys' back where I grew up seem to be owned and operated by butch lesbians. Take a map and draw a thirty mile radius around Utica, NY and you will have a zone wherein all Arby's are pretty much completely lesbian-run.
It's not the case in LA, of course, most of the people in Arbys out here seem to be of some Latin extraction but... y'know... 75% of the population out here is of some Latin extraction so it's not really statistically significant.
Whereas... I do not think the Mohawk Valley is 75% lesbian. Though it would explain some things.
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Now that's thread necromancy.
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Often, I will go into the "Who's Online" section and flip through what the unregistered users are reading. It is fascinating to me how far back and how random in terms of subject matter some of these searches go. So... I clicks on 'em... and reply if I have something to say.
If such a thing is genuinely frowned upon, I'll totally curb that enthusiasm.
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I honestly don't mind thread necromancy. It just strikes me as funny to see a thread from 2003 rise from its slumber. Will it find new life for itself, or will it sink again into the restless sleep of the outmoded?
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In general zombie threads don't bother me -- they can be kind of fun. But I opened this one and saw that Zart was the OP'er. A quick date check dashed my faint hopes that he'd rejoined us.
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Dude no shit, hope springs eternal.
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But I opened this one and saw that Zart was the OP'er.
Oh, okay. I do completely get the "is this an old poster coming back?" tease thing and how that'd suck.
To that end, I completely mea and totally culpa.
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Dude no shit, hope springs eternal.
Let's go ahead an rename this TOUS_ZMB
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Let's go ahead an rename this TOUS_ZMB
That would be fun and would also fuck with new folks, which would be fun. As well. Also.
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At first I missed the relevance of V's assertion of thread zombiedom. "December 26th - that's not too long ago..."