The OFFICIAL Unofficial Achewood Message Board
Trivial Pursuits => People & Places => Topic started by: side_show on March 11, 2011, 09:25:13 pm
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This is a question for the men on the board:
What would inspire you to volunteer for a mentorship program?
I am currently designing a mentorship recruitment program seeking out male aboriginal volunteers. I've done a lot of research and the barriers men face when it comes to volunteering are significant, so I know this is an uphill battle. I'm initiating a "Man Up" campaign based on other successful recruitment programs where my hundreds of coworkers invite men they know who they think would make good mentors to join my volunteer program. I also have one of my male volunteer mentors who is willing to come along with me and extole the virtues of the program to other potential recruits.
Thoughts?
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My social circle is greatly influenced by Mad Men. There is a serious desire to bring back being what men are supposed to be, and that includes responsibility to the other young me). Maybe tap that. Would get my attention at least.
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I feel influenced by Mad Men, but also a lot of that show is about how those people are horrible.
I guess I am OK with being Horrible if I get to be married to Alison Brie.
A lot of people I know have never heard of Mad Men.
Honestly, I do not know anything that would inspire me to volunteer for this kind of thing. But I guess you are probably going for an older demographic?
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Mad Men exposes the faults that should be corrected in the next revision.
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What would inspire you to volunteer for a mentorship program?
Being asked.
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Being asked.
This seems like a big one, and I think your plan of one on one recruitment is a good one.
Your biggest obstacle, the kind of weird stoicism (or something) that will stop men putting themselves forward is also a strength in that the same type of person would almost never say no if asked. Put another way: why do people not put themselves forward for something? They doubt their inherent value or ability to contribute. But being asked, and asked specifically, turns it from 'come help if you think you're good enough' into 'I want you to help because I think you're good.' it's a validation thing.
I'd volunteer for something like that if I thought the kids were actively interested in what I could show them. That's an odd way to put it I guess but the thing that would hold me back (besides feeling I'm too young and don't have enough life experience to mentor anything) would be that I'd look at myself and say 'I'm an upper middle class guy who isn't particularly sporty and spent most of his adult life in university, how the hell are kids going to relate to me?'. The trick again would be not to say that people are needed but *you* specifically are needed.
Not sure how you do that.
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I feel influenced by Mad Men, but also a lot of that show is about how those people are horrible.
I guess I am OK with being Horrible if I get to be married to Alison Brie.
I've only seen one episode of Mad Men, and was definitely motivated by Christina Hendricks. I was motivated so hard.
They doubt their inherent value or ability to contribute. But being asked, and asked specifically, turns it from 'come help if you think you're good enough' into 'I want you to help because I think you're good.' it's a validation thing.
This nails the problem for a lot of dudes. Nails it so hard. Sorry, having a tough time moving on.
Seriously though, one of my friends mentors (or at least did for quite some time) a younger, sort of at risk kid, and he's not the sort of dude you would expect to do that type of thing. Like seems really self-involved at first glance. I think if you asked him what motivated him in the first place he'd say, only somewhat jokingly, that it was the hope that there would be a hot mom he could bone. There wasn't of course and he stuck with it for quite a while. Might still be doing it. I imagine he was probably just asked my someone and thought it was a good thing to do, but next time I see him I'll ask if there is anything more specific.
Might be important to know that he didn't love it, but stuck with it out of a sense of responsibility. I guess the kid is kind of a little shit, and I think he was expecting Pepe.
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Thanks for the input guys.
AW is right, in research I've read the number one successful recruitment method for men os "being asked."
I do like the Mad Men angle in that I aim to have my mentors celebrate and explore "being a man." I've done quite a bit of research into successful male mentoring, and a lot of what makes a successful match between a young boy and a role model ties to accepting and celebrating the needs of young men as very different to young women. I am careful to make clear to the men I approach that I do not expect them to fill a nurturing role. It is remarkable how many of the men who take interest in my program come from a place of deep turmoil about what it means to be a man, which leads them to doubt their ability to be a mentor. The same men who grew up without a male role model are often the ones who most understand the need for male role models, which can be tricky. I get a lot of guys who basically have no confidence in themselves, which often leads to them talking themselves out of participating. Women on the other hand are confident in their capacity to support a youth, even with no personal experience, because it's such a concrete part of their social role. I work from a strength based model, where I determine a guy's pre-existing abilities and skills and assure him I can find a young man who will value acquiring the same. Once I have a man show interest in mentoring, I can get them over the hump if they're willing to admit their good at something. It's surprisingly hard to get people to admit that though.
As for the Christina Hendricks thing... my lady lumps have be a problem at community recruitment fairs. I have had multiple attempts at approaching random men and expressing interest in them get misread as flirtation. This leads to a lot of the wrong kind of interest, and a lot of wasted energy on my part. Nothing like the other agencies staff coming over saying all sarcastic/salacious "you sure had a lot of interest in your table!" It's pretty awkward in regard to the misread signals.
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I think I would do it as a way to inspire me to do something that is more positive and long-lasting with my life. I'm kinda lazy, otherwise. And being asked, of course.
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I think I could leverage this into free lawn care. You know, to teach the kid some work ethic. Work that angle too.
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Hadn't thought of that. I've got a fence that needs painting.
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We have a separate work experience program. It's run by staff and the kids get paid slightly over minimum wage for their work, so any of the boys who want work shoveling snow, mowing lawns, painting, doing home repair, learning work skills,etc. have lots of opportunities for such skills to be developed outside my program. We also have staff that run programs connecting kids with education or higher level work experience too.
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Yeah but that involves pay. I said free lawn service that I pay for with invaluable life lessons that I shout into the air from my porch. Seriously though, that work program sounds excellent.
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Yeah but that involves pay. I said free lawn service that I pay for with invaluable life lessons that I shout into the air from my porch.
Aren't you a little young to be telling the kids to get off of your lawn?
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Aren't you a little young to be telling the kids to get off of your lawn?
They can stay on my lawn if they're making positive economic contributions from which I can capture benefit.
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AC is interested in a form of mentoring where he can have the minimum amount of contact possible with a kid, ideally shouting from a distance, and end up with a weed-free lawn.
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I'm not sure if a legion of Clint Eastwood-style mentors would be my worst nightmare or dream-come-true. Maybe a mix of both.
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Hey, it worked for Clint Eastwood so why shouldn't all follow that model?
You saw how well that worked out for him.
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So I should target shrivelled up husks of mankind for mentors?
I can see the poster now:
Are you:
Empty?
Broken by the weight of the world?
Otherwise disenfranchised?
Come share how fucked up you are with a kid who may be more or less fucked up than you. Possibly achieve redemption and/or get taken down by that bullet you've been waiting for all your life.
Call now!
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So I should target shrivelled up husks of mankind for mentors?
I can see the poster now:
Are you:
Empty?
Broken by the weight of the world?
Otherwise disenfranchised?
Come share how fucked up you are with a kid who may be more or less fucked up than you. Possibly achieve redemption and/or get taken down by that bullet you've been waiting for all your life.
Call now!
that is beautiful. you get a can. if i do it up on photoshop for the hell of it, will you be pissed?
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I will be pleased.
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i have new classes starting next week, so its going to be a while. i promise not to forget and i'll post it here in the group for all to cheer/jeer.
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That's cool GKA. Maybe I will put it up in my cubicle when my boss isn't looking for a laugh.
I should mention that Aboriginal men in Canada are criminalized. Very similar to the African American population, many of my community's men get pulled over for Driving While Indian or other such things and have minor criminal records for the sort of youthful follies people who aren't brownish males get away with. I'm not kidding - out of all the well mannered Aboriginal men I've had apply to volunteer, there is not one without a minor infraction of some sort. I first ask them what they learned from their arrests, and if they learned something concrete from the error of their ways, I'm the first to admit to these young men that the difference between them and I is that they got caught. I have to take each criminal offense to my boss and HR, if it was a long-time ago offense and/or not directly related to being dangerous around kids, they get the green-light. I have had to turn away an ex-gang member who I genuinely believe had changed his ways, but then again, I know if I were a parent, I'm pretty sure I wouldn't want my son being mentored by a guy who was in jail for manslaughter (murder charge pleaded down).
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I think a-cap and others would like this blog (http://artofmanliness.com/) despite the really dumb design.
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So I should target shrivelled up husks of mankind for mentors?
I can see the poster now:
Are you:
Empty?
Broken by the weight of the world?
Otherwise disenfranchised?
Come share how fucked up you are with a kid who may be more or less fucked up than you. Possibly achieve redemption and/or get taken down by that bullet you've been waiting for all your life.
Call now!
that is beautiful. you get a can. if i do it up on photoshop for the hell of it, will you be pissed?
i haven't even started this yet, but i didnt forget my promise. soon, bro's and sista's. soon.
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Oh man. That's awesome. I had forgotten all about this until now.
As a matter of fact, I had to postpone my recruitment for the Man Up campaigne until September due to circumstances, so I'll be working on a real poster (non-snazzy, Publisher-style) soon too.
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I had to postpone my recruitment for the Man Up campaigne until September due to circumstances
Does your campaign need a mentor?
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Does your campaign need a mentor mascot?
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(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v337/inmyskittelz/torinomentorad.jpg)
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There are no words. However, there are cans.
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Wouldn't that make a nice t-shirt (http://www.customink.com/designs/torinoment/wkn0-000k-b3q9/hotlink?pc=HL-46120&cm_mmc=hotlink-_-2-_-Body_txt-_-button1)?
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heh. i would smile like a prideful motherfucker if i saw that t-shirt IRL.