The OFFICIAL Unofficial Achewood Message Board
Trivial Pursuits => Sports & Leisure => Topic started by: lprkn on March 12, 2012, 09:35:32 am
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Feeling like doing fantasy baseball for the first time ever. Anybody else doing it this year?
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I know! Let's get the new guy to do it!
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noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
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THE MIXED PICKLES ARE BACK!
(The more teams the merrier!)
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Thanks, Ash. Yeah, it's all there. sMets, congrats on your league victory. (What, too soon?)
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Oh, I'm guaranteed nothing.
If The Anxiety takes over for a while, I don't know where the hell I'll end up.
I go into hiding for weeks from different parts of the internet for various The Anxiety related reasons.
Who knows?
It's spring in baseball and in the spring, we all have hopes of being undermined by Emotional Problems.
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if beginner's luck can't deliver me a win, ain't no hope left in the bucket. have fun, fellas.
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A Strassburger? Do they call it that because the French and the Germans fight over it for 150 years?
Only if it has Lorraine Swiss cheese on it...
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This signature dish is the perfect entrée to share at this affordably-priced family restaurant.
Emphasis added. (I hope you have seven friends to share it with.)
NATITUDE!
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I see six teams in there. When does baseball start? July?
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Looks like we're at seven teams now. We'll need an even number to conduct a draft.
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It's already started. I'm enjoying Seattle's time with the best record in the league while I can.
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Draft, 'Nabu, turn on the draft, br'a.
This. Season starts tomorrow.
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Hey, my roster is awash in Nationals and Phillies! Imagine that!
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Since when are they the Miami Marlins?
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Man, I keep forgetting that baseball has started. I have to pay attention!
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I'm still pissed the Astros are going to the American League.
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Sorry about all that, guys. I was busy with real life.
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Hey Ash,
Did you see that Schlereth's son pitches for the Tigers these days? He's not very good from what I can tell.
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Schlereth turned out to be a lot better under ol' Leatherface's unique brand of O-line coaching than he would have been on another team. The leg whip provides quite an advantage.
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For serious, I got leg whipped so bad oncet that it blew an artery in my shin and they had to cut a thumb shaped plug in it to go to town cauterizing shit shut. After that, any fuck who tried to leg whip me I caught him on the ground and drove a forearm into the back of the fuck's neck and tried to pinch his dome off. They would do the technique after that, but their heart wasn't in it. Same thing with a lineman who would punch you in the gut/ribs if you put your hands up for a ball on a pass rush. That guy you start every pass rush with a rip move that started at his belt buckle and followed with a swim move that started at his armpit where you tried to punch his lung out his mouth...
Baseball was easier to police. You put one in dude's ear or behind his shoulder blades and then you all meet at the mound for a duke off. Problem solved. If you're channeling Ty Cobb you slide into second and spike a dude in the nuts and then have the same fight.
They send one of yours to the hospital, you send one of theirs to the morgue. That's the Asherdan way!
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I'm still pissed the Astros are going to the American League.
You and I will become official enemies.
Just kidding, the only team in the AL West I hate is the The Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim. I'm not the first to lamely point this out, but come on. "The The Angels Angels of Anaheim?" Seriously?
Kind of has a Lou Gehrig feel to it though.
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Can I just point out here that I managed to beat Mixed Pickles, so my season is basically complete?
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Also, a buddy gave me this:
Baseball is about homecoming. It is a journey by theft and strength, guile and speed, out around first to the far island of second, where foes lurk in the reefs and the green sea suddenly grows deeper, then to turn sharply, skimming the shallows, making for a shore that will show a friendly face, a color, a familiar language and, at third, to proceed, no longer by paths indirect but straight, to home.
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I miss this guy. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eRfhbEUkg7o)
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Ray... people will come, Ray. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7SB16il97yw)
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Ray... people will come, Ray. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7SB16il97yw)
I was expecting this. (http://achewood.com/index.php?date=04302007)
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Bryce Harper... (http://itsalwayssunnyindetroit.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/Fan-Moons-Camera_Bryce_Harper_first_hit.jpg)is that moon made out of green cheese?
Fuck city banging.
I haven't heard that expression in a long time.
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Which expression?
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Which expression?
Fuck City bangin'
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Bryce Harper is a frickin' nut job. In a good way. Folks are gonna love to hate him.
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Two screaming doubles and an infield single by Harper, and a walk-off home run by Ian Desmond. Throw in $1 hot dogs and it was a good night at Nationals Park.
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I missed Weaver's no-hitter because of fambly stuff.
in-law fambly stuff, even!
D'OH!
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Josh Hamilton played hisself a little ball today.
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He won't get another cent out of me.
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Ultimately I think I need to stick to the "Banana Town" motif. But this morning I was this close to changing my team name to "Clown Questions."
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Nice perfect game, Matt Cain.
I'm so glad I remembered to adjust my roster to include you yesterday.
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Nice perfect game, Matt Cain.
I'm so glad I remembered to adjust my roster to include you yesterday.
Holy crap, now Felix Hernandez did it for me!
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Holy crap, now Felix Hernandez did it for me!
King Felix! I don't even care that he's not on my roster.
Now if only Seattle could score some runs.
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I have neglected to post any summaries down the stretch of our fantasy baseball league because the regular season was rather anti-climactic. The playoff partici##### were largely obvious weeks in advance--the Petards didn't actually clinch #6 until the last week, but it would have taken a major miracle for them to not make it. The only race with any drama at all was for the #2 spot, which was taken by Ash's Oakey Blues squad.
So first round of playoffs, in progress:
#3 Asafoetida (AW) vs. #6 Petards (LePorkin)
#4 Banana Town (Carlos) vs. #5 Monkeys (Nabu)
Waiting in the wings: #1 Fun on Mars (Felix), #2 Oakey Blues (Ash)
If I've misattributed anyone's teams, please advise. Good luck, evry'buddy.
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First round o' playoffs:
Monkeys 6, Banana Town 4 (I was leading most of the week, but couldn't hang on)
Asafoetida 9, Petards 1
Semi-finals:
Monkeys vs. Fun on Mars
Asafoetida vs. Oakey Blues
Good luck y'inz.
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BTW, Pat I promise not to give a rat's ass about the "5th place game" if you don't.
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I give no fucks. That is how many fucks I give.
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Semi-final results:
Fun on Mars 9, Venomous Monkeys 1. Daaaaaaaaaamn.
Asafoetida 6, Oakey Blues 3.
So your glorious champeenship final pits the regular-season champ Fun on Mars vs. the three-seed Asafoetida (known in some parts of India as Heeng). Monkeys vs. Blues for third place. The final runs up right through the end of the for-reals regular season on October 3. Good luck, all y'all.
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Daaaaamn, people. Asafoetida led Fun on Mars 7-3 last week. Yesterday, it was 6-4. The smoke cleared last night and it was 5-5.
WHAT'S THE TIEBREAKER?!? I had to look it up. It's regular-season aggregate head-to-head record. Asafoetida 15, Fun on Mars 13. That includes a 6-2 Asafoetida win in the last week of the regular season, so there you go.
Congrats to the Egg Man. I believe that's two champeenships in three years, no?
Oakey Blues takes the bronze 4-3 over the Venomous Monkeys.
Thanks to all for a good season. On to the real playoffs!
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Thank you all, and kudos to Fun on Mars who led almost the entire regular season. I got lucky in the last few weeks. I got especially lucky to win in a tie-break because I neglected to update my roster on Tuesday and missed out on some good stats. Now to focus on football!
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Correction: two titles in five years for AW. Because I don't like doing actual work, I looked up our previous winners.
2012: AugustWest, Iron Felix, Asherdan
2011: LFM, Carlos del Vaca, Iron Felix
2010: Jorge Fabregas, Felix, Carlos
2009: Felix, Jorge, Ash
2008: AW, Carlos, LFM
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Correction: two titles in five years for AW. Because I don't like doing actual work, I looked up our previous winners.
2012: AugustWest, Iron Felix, Asherdan
2011: LFM, Carlos del Vaca, Iron Felix
2010: Jorge Fabregas, Felix, Carlos
2009: Felix, Jorge, Ash
2008: AW, Carlos, LFM
Looks like Felix usually ends up in the money somewhere.