The OFFICIAL Unofficial Achewood Message Board
Achewood => Achewood => Topic started by: slink on January 26, 2004, 12:02:54 pm
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Who'da thunk it. Ray all ollie'ing beautifully. Kickass frontside grab.
I'd love to know where he found that halfpipe on the way to Carl's.
And I'm guessing this is Carl pre-neutering?
Now, who's wang haven't we seen yet, as far as Achewood character's go?
Oh and also, those are the illest skating clothes I ever have seen. I totally want Onstad to do a cool 80's style R tee like that so I can start skating again in it.
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Boy howdy, I did NOT need to see Beef's ding dong this morning.
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Boy howdy, I did NOT need to see Beef's ding dong this morning.
yeah. i'm hung over, and it was very alarming. my eyes kind of hurt.
still, i want that R tee.
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I'd have looked at today's strip, but Achewood.com is 404 right now.
Maybe Onstad had trouble paying the hosting bill.
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yeah. i'm hung over, and it was very alarming. my eyes kind of hurt.
still, i want that R tee.
Man. You're hung over, but Beef is just hung. Dang.
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oh my god straight-up ding-dong action this morning
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Zounds. That hurt.
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Dang, every male cat I ever had has his ding-dong in a little furry sheath type thing. It stayed there unless it was angry.
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of course, the day of my first post has to be a ding-dong day.
How come I get the feeling that indignities are about to be visited on Mr. C. "Roast Beef" Kazenzakis' bozack?
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How come I get the feeling that indignities are about to be visited on Mr. C. "Roast Beef" Kazenzakis' bozack?
But there's no cross bar on a skateboard? Or whatever they are called (long time since I cycled).
Of course he could, despite not trying to do a 50-50 grind, manage to fall on the banister, straddle-wise.
Has to be said, I was a little shocked discovering Beef's wang, while drinking my first coffee, with bacon roll, at work, of a morning. Odd start to the week. Although fitting.
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Alright Mr. or Ms. Bozack, how would you suggest we refer to you? Numbers ain't a name. I'm thinking you should be Bozak, or Ding Dong Day.
~Paul
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Alright Mr. or Ms. Bozack, how would you suggest we refer to you? Numbers ain't a name.
OBLIGATORY PATRICK MCGOOHAN REFERENCE
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I'm not sure there's ever a good time to see Beef's ding-dong. I feel faintly dirty right now, as if I have been a bad, bad person.
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Okay, who hasn't had their ding-dong eminate from their short-##### at some point while playing sports in the summer?
I've never had it while skating, but still.
If Beef gets it caught in anything, I think I'm going to take a little vacation from reading Achewood for awhile.
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Just the prospect of seeing some porn has put beef in a state. This legendarily occurred to an acquaintance in High School as well - we had those track shorts, the satiny ones with the sort of speedo-type thing sewn into them. His junk allegedly erected and emerged whilst running (hard to believe, that part). I think Beef has just lost control of his adolescent junk.
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OH WOW! This must explain the nickname I got on the cross-country team in 8th grade.
Mr. Peekaboo.
I don't know whether to weep or strut.
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Okay, who hasn't had their ding-dong eminate from their short-***** at some point while playing sports in the summer?
Well, I haven't.
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I thought we called you "Mr Vienna".
Now if they had called you "Abe Frohman", that would have been funny.
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I'm guessing the pains to come to Beef's wang won't involve impact but more along the lines of Debbie catching a glimpse. Then Beef'll get all embarresed and run home before having to face a nickname the next day.
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every dudes junk drawer gets rattled open at some point
Again, I must point out that this is 10x funnier than today's strip.
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I'm guessing the pains to come to Beef's wang won't involve impact but more along the lines of Debbie catching a glimpse. Then Beef'll get all embarresed and run home before having to face a nickname the next day.
Well, I'm no doctor of cat-c*ck-ology, but it doesn't look like Beef really has anything to be ashamed of. He is coming all the way out of his shorts and is obviously not even erect i mean come on.
Ha, yes, please refer to me as Bozack or perhaps D3: Ding Dong Day.
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Wow, nicely done, El Bozak. You are a titan of our time.
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Wow, nicely done, El Bozak. You are a titan of our time.
I was leaning toward D3: Ding Dong Day. I even found a great avatar.
(http://www.tiscali.co.uk/community/galleries/vintage_bikinis/images/small/doris_day.jpg)
Where's the ding dong? You don't want to know.
~Paul
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His junk allegedly erected and emerged whilst running (hard to believe, that part). I think Beef has just lost control of his adolescent junk.
Nah, it's just the vibration from the steps. Like sitting on a particularly bad bus.
And as for Jough, wondering whether about junk coming out from under shorts... I have never worn shorts. They scare me beyond belief. Let alone the fact I have the worst legs for shorts now. I used to have good legs. Now, alas... All hairy and white.
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Where's the ding dong? You don't want to know.
Paul, you worry me. I mean that in the best way possible.
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<-------Is that good? Is that what you WANT?
Here it is again:
(http://img17.photobucket.com/albums/v51/Bozack/doris.jpg)
Oh, also, I thought I once heard that cats and dogs (along with, hypothetically, other animals) can, when in danger, suck their bozacks into their stomach cavities. Why does Beef not utilize this bozack-saving strategum?
ALSO:
So, we know when Beef was born he was not "all developed," hence Cassandra. But, having now seen his Hydden Sceptyre, and finding it good, we have to ask: what else is down there?
P.S. Dear diary, talked about a cartoon cat's genitalia today, at length, on the internet. Also, became everything I once mocked. Perhaps now god can free me from this mockery of life.
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So, we know when Beef was born he was not "all developed," hence Cassandra. But, having now seen his Hydden Sceptyre, and finding it good, we have to ask: what else is down there?
This is an excellent question, even if it also makes me shudder to think.
P.S. Dear diary, talked about a cartoon cat's genitalia today, at length, on the internet. Also, became everything I once mocked. Perhaps now god can free me from this mockery of life.
Welcome to the board! It's like this all the time. Everyone floats down here.
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Reading this strip is like pulling up beside a car at a stoplight, and noticing that your friend is driving, and then looking into the backseat and seeing another friend's ass.
It's like living with a man who will creep up behind you, take out his wang, and say your name to get you to turn around.
Not that I would know what that's like.
Not at all.
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It's like living with a man who will creep up behind you, take out his wang, and say your name to get you to turn around.
Oh great, now I have try that.
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Why do I get the impression we're all wandering down a perilous, perilous path?
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<-------Is that good? Is that what you WANT?
It exceeds my greatest expectations.
~Paul
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ALSO: Welcome, Bozak!
I read that and imagined this:
Driving late at night, past a Best Western. Up on the glowing sign, this:
JANUARY 12- UNITED STATES HOG FARMERS CONVENTION
JANUARY 18- JUNIOR LITTLE LEAGUE PING-PONG CHAMPIONSHIPS
JANUARY 19- MASS SUICIDE, BRUNCH
ALSO: WELCOME, BOZAK!
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Oh, also, I thought I once heard that cats and dogs (along with, hypothetically, other animals) can, when in danger, suck their bozacks into their stomach cavities. Why does Beef not utilize this bozack-saving strategum?
Beef isn't aware he's hanging out. If he was he'd tuck in before arriving. Debbie will be the first to see, make a joke, and start a silly nickname for him. Of course she'll secretly be flirting and wishing her bf had a wang like that.
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Is this the first strip which is Not Safe For Work? Or did I just never notice before because I used to have a private office?
Much of the discussion above has made me thankful in a way I never was before for not having a ding-dong.
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Is this the first strip which is Not Safe For Work? Or did I just never notice before because I used to have a private office?
Much of the discussion above has made me thankful in a way I never was before for not having a ding-dong.
http://www.achewood.com/index.php?date=01252002
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Oh my freaking god--that is a Santa Cruz Rob Roskopp circa 1987 with a tailbone and alternating-color wheels (most likely Powell-Peralta Rat Bones in pink and green) JUST LIKE the one I had. I bet Ray had those Tracker Ultralight trucks back in the day too. I am SO having a flashback. Now that I think of it, I had that DK's T-shirt too. Ray is my dogg FOREVER. Beef too.
*edited for continuity because I so scatterbrained
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Everyone has had that DK shirt. But I must say, your rad skate-board-having-ownedness does impress.
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I never heard of that before the Beef's birthday flashback (http://www.achewood.com/index.php?date=04222002)
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Everyone has had that DK shirt.
Yes, literally, I think there was a time when each newborn babe was given one Dead Kennedy's shirt, and that one Misfits shirt, with the ghoul on it. The only thing I remember from middle school is thousands of identical skinny little kids with shaved heads, all wearing one of those shirts. I remember....I was the son of a Philipino merchant....I was sitting on the steps of his store...I remember I was...I was crying.
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That shirt led directly to one of the most vehement lectures I've ever received in a classroom, courtesy of my HS history teacher. He was very concerned with the tastelesness of the bands name.
Needless to say, I was supremely proud to have bugged him so deeply. That was half the point of the shirt, RIGHT?
I do know that feeling. My MST3K "BITE ME" shirt had a similar purpose, back in eighth grade.
(I had a shirt with Leonardo's picture of the many-armed naked dude* which was intended to serve a similar purpose, but my mother vetoed it. Le sigh. My life was PAIN AND BLACK ROSES.)
* yes, I am that undercultured.
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I don't know... the only Dead Kennedys T-shirt I've seen recently (perhaps due to the band having been broken up for a long time -- but I'm just guessing) had the band's logo on the back and "Nazi Punks Fuck Off" on the front. And he was sitting in the front row of a comedy show where I was performing. Therefore:
'One minute -- there's a gentleman in the front row. Could you stand up, please, sir? This man is wearing a shirt which reads, "Nazi Punks Fuck Off", and I'd just like to applaud him for his courageous anti-Nazi punk stance. It's not even like, "Nazi Punks are Evil", is it? It's just "Fuck Off" -- you sound annoyed by the notion. "Nazi punks? Ah, get out of here. I don't like you..."'
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I totally had that shirt back in high school. And I also used to dress in all black a lot and if any authority figure would be a smart-ass and ask me if I were in mourning or something I'd tell them that it was a Holiday in Cambodia.
I haven't listened to DK in a while but dang they were my favourite band for a year or so.
Any Minor Threat homeboys in the house? Fugazi represent, yo.
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So,
Could this be leading to how Roast Beef got his name? (So so so sorry if I forgot the strip that already explains it).
http://www.achewood.com/index.php?date=03212002
That's all I can come up with.
Also, Roast Beef seems to be quite the DK fan.
http://www.achewood.com/index.php?date=04222002
Further, "hell of decrepit"? That made me laugh. So Beef.
And lastly, "Oh shit yes!" Classic Ray.
A good strip.
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Nope:
http://www.achewood.com/index.php?date=08072002
I would love to have that hanging on my wall.
Is this the first strip which is Not Safe For Work? Or did I just never notice before because I used to have a private office?
Much of the discussion above has made me thankful in a way I never was before for not having a ding-dong.
Well, it's a blessing and a curse.
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'One minute -- there's a gentleman in the front row. Could you stand up, please, sir? This man is wearing a shirt which reads, "Nazi Punks Fuck Off", and I'd just like to applaud him for his courageous anti-Nazi punk stance. It's not even like, "Nazi Punks are Evil", is it? It's just "Fuck Off" -- you sound annoyed by the notion. "Nazi punks? Ah, get out of here. I don't like you..."'
Before this got buried, I'd just like to point out that this made me a happy person. So there.
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Dang, every male cat I ever had has his ding-dong in a little furry sheath type thing. It stayed there unless it was angry.
CAT PENES ARE BARBED! WHERE ARE THE BARBS?
* yes, that's the real plural of c*ck, penes.
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I wish I had Penes.
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* yes, that's the real plural of c*ck, penes.
Somebody's been reading the Straight Dope (http://www.straightdope.com/mailbag/mplurals.html)
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* yes, that's the real plural of c*ck, penes.
Somebody's been reading the Straight Dope (http://www.straightdope.com/mailbag/mplurals.html)
I knew it before hand. Linguistics is an amateur hobby of mine. I am actually trying to learn ancient Sumerian (http://www.sumerian.org).
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CAT PENES ARE BARBED! WHERE ARE THE BARBS?
DON'T
* yes, that's the real plural of c*ck, penes.
Then God only knows what the hell "Rudimentary Peni" actually means. [CONJECTURE OMITTED]
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But, having now seen his Hydden Sceptyre, and finding it good
Does this statement sound as if originates in the early chapters of Genesis to anyone else?
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Linguistics used to be a profession of mine, so can I just say that even when there is a fancier alternative, it is almost always Tasteful to use the regular English plural when you are speaking English. It is preferable to running the risk of saying something like 'octopi' which is a word in no language at all (as the Straight Dope explains well.)
OK, down off the soapbox. I am hoping that as time passes, I will stop having these fits of being possessed by the linguistics professor persona.
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Linguistics used to be a profession of mine, so can I just say that even when there is a fancier alternative, it is almost always Tasteful to use the regular English plural when you are speaking English. It is preferable to running the risk of saying something like 'octopi' which is a word in no language at all (as the Straight Dope explains well.)
OK, down off the soapbox. I am hoping that as time passes, I will stop having these fits of being possessed by the linguistics professor persona.
It depends on the word. You don't say testises, or neurosises. Consistency is good!
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I was under the impression that the standard english plural "-es" is always considered correct even if the latin plural is preferred. But maybe that's just me being hopeful because i have a terrible history with spelling and grammar and such.
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Hmmm... Hell, Friendlys, politics...
Which achewood strip topic causes us to generate THREE PAGES of responses?
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It depends on the word. You don't say testises, or neurosises. Consistency is good!
But you DO say 'c*ckes.' Consistency with other speakers of your language is the consistency that matters.
Someone stop me! I need to go find some animal poop to clean up....
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Wombat is awesome!
It's You All, not Y'all.
Or is does it depend on where you are and who you are talking to? I think proper English usage is important, but we can't start going around Saudi Arabia style laying beatdowns on people who speak Urban patois or with southern dialectual habits. I guess we have to admit that language (d)evolves (meaning changes) and try to be understood as best we can.
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Is a lexicon prescriptive or descriptive? Is a word officially part of the language because we use it or because some arbiter says it is? How does one get to be this arbiter? If I have the resources to publish a dictionary does that make me a language authority unto myself?
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Or is does it depend on where you are and who you are talking to?
Yes.
I used to teach a class that took a whole semester explaining why that is how language works, with examples and footnotes and cartoons and personal anecdotes and references to popular culture and charts and graphs and phonetic transcription...
But you said it all in one sentence.
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P.S. Of course, it should be clear that this means we should all say 'penes' when talking to Bobby Isoceles....if only because we can't please him even more by speaking to him in Ancient Sumerian.
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I may be a bad person for this, but I enjoy the (non)word "octopi" and will endeavor to keep using it. To me, it fulfills the basic requirements for a word, in that I say it and my concept is clearly communicated. I also just like saying it, too: "octopi!" It's satisfying.
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The U.S. has no definitive resource for language. But France does.
L'Académie Française decides on what is and is not officially part of the language. Their rules may or may not have any bearing on actual usage.
Just last year, for instance, they outlawed the use of the word "e-mail," and created their own word, Courriel, a blending of "courrier" (mail) and "electronique" (electronic).
It makes sense, I suppose, for the French to want their own word for it (lest they get too many phrases like "le weekend" horning their way into the language) but of course no one but government agencies actually *use* the word, since the word "e-mail" is ubiquitous throughout the world.
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Following Jough's post: it should be very interesting in about 10 years to see if there are two distinct languages in France, a sort of "high" or government French and a sort of "French language of the people".
Go Proles, Go!
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There's already a disconnect between the Academy and the people - the French have SO MUCH slang and in some sub-coutures they use slang almost exclusively. It really irks a lot of old fashioned people.
I'm not just talking about teenagers being rebellious, either. I'm talking entire segments of the population - entire cities of people using a good 25% of language that is not officially approved by the "Ministry of Culture."
Please don't construe this as French-bashing, because I happen to love the French people, their culture, and language (via the Academy or otherwise).
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English has unofficial arbiters. I know a lot of editors who rely entirely on a combination of the AP manual and Merriam-Webster. Others swear by the OED which doesn't make sense to me as an american speaker.
This did make me remeber my HS spanish teacher who would go on for whole class periods about us ruining spanish. Apparently because they were using words like emailar and beepar (to call a beeper/pager). Meanwhile she though all the spanish influences on english were just dandy.
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P.S. Of course, it should be clear that this means we should all say 'penes' when talking to Bobby Isoceles....if only because we can't please him even more by speaking to him in Ancient Sumerian.
Thank you. I don't know if Ancient Sumerian can ever be spoken as no one knows what it sounds like! They have best guesses. It can only be read.
*bobby isosceles, deity.
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I guess that the best you can hope for is that someday you can sit in the back of the classroom and pass notes in Ancient Sumerian, then.
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I guess that the best you can hope for is that someday you can sit in the back of the classroom and pass notes in Ancient Sumerian, then.
Getting rock-hard thinking about it.
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Penes, Penes, Penes! That's all we talk about around here anymore!
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I guess that the best you can hope for is that someday you can sit in the back of the classroom and pass notes in Ancient Sumerian, then.
Getting rock-hard thinking about it.
Well, whatever butters your toast, man.
That said, Ancient Sumerian would be the best language ever to pass notes in. Confuse your homeroom teacher! Baffle the bullies!
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Penes, Penes, Penes! That's all we talk about around here anymore!
Let's hear it for breasts! Boobies, boobies!
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How 'bout some respect for the boo-tay? Booties, booties, booties!
Wait, that looks like I get off on babies' footwear...
I guess what I'm trying to say is, I like big butts. And, I do not lie.
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I think this thread has exhausted its usefulness at this point.