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Trivial Pursuits => Sports & Leisure => Topic started by: CortJstr on February 03, 2004, 11:29:06 pm

Title: Things that People Say Taste Like Chicken but Don't
Post by: CortJstr on February 03, 2004, 11:29:06 pm: frog legs

alligator

people?
Title: Things that People Say Taste Like Chicken but Don't
Post by: AlohaDawg on February 03, 2004, 11:32:36 pm: 5 year old otter

Martha Stewart (but we'll have to ask her cellmate)
Title: Things that People Say Taste Like Chicken but Don't
Post by: wombat on February 04, 2004, 12:09:50 am: No, people taste like pork. That's a whole other thread.
Title: Things that People Say Taste Like Chicken but Don't
Post by: AlohaDawg on February 04, 2004, 12:30:21 am: Soylent Green tastes like pork?
Title: Things that People Say Taste Like Chicken but Don't
Post by: slink on February 04, 2004, 01:36:14 am: Quote from: "AlohaDawg"
Soylent Green tastes like pork?

True. Apparently cannibals in the Phillipines really liked Spam when it was introduced by sailors, because it tastes most like human flesh.
Title: Things that People Say Taste Like Chicken but Don't
Post by: jay-ell on February 04, 2004, 01:45:02 am: I don't know if this qualifies, but I ate a chicken-flavored imitation meat patty this afternoon for lunch, and it tasted vaguely like chicken. The breaded coating had more flavor than the "meat," though.
Title: Things that People Say Taste Like Chicken but Don't
Post by: St_Zartan on February 04, 2004, 01:47:49 am: Quote from: "slink"
True. Apparently cannibals in the Phillipines really liked Spam when it was introduced by sailors, because it tastes most like human flesh.

Hence the slang (does the word "slang" really apply in a scenario like this?) for human flesh, prepared for consumption - long pig. I just report the facts, folks.

Way way back in my online days, I found an interesting textfile that basically detailed the butchery of a human corpse for consumption; like all k-rad anarchy textfiles, it's best to take it with a grain of salt (har har har) but I could see how someone with a sound knowledge of butchery and a copy of Gray's Anatomy could work out the basics without a (how to put this...) test subject.

Let me also take this opportunity to express my undying affection for cargo cults. AIRFIELDS MADE OUT OF BAMBOO

EDIT: what a corker for post 200
Title: Things that People Say Taste Like Chicken but Don't
Post by: andalucia on February 04, 2004, 02:25:29 am: I assumed that slang, as it were, was to what wombat was referring... As for Spam being introduced to cannibals, I have a lot of trouble imagining that particular cultural collision.
Title: Things that People Say Taste Like Chicken but Don't
Post by: CortJstr on February 04, 2004, 02:44:55 am: Quote from: "andalucia"
I assumed that slang, as it were, was to what wombat was referring... As for Spam being introduced to cannibals, I have a lot of trouble imagining that particular cultural collision.

Must I do all the Googling around here? (http://www.straightdope.com/classics/a5_229.html)
Title: Things that People Say Taste Like Chicken but Don't
Post by: wombat on February 04, 2004, 02:49:35 am: Lovely Spam... Perhaps we can make every thread in this forum eventually work its way around to Spam.
Title: Things that People Say Taste Like Chicken but Don't
Post by: andalucia on February 04, 2004, 04:01:20 am: Ah, excellent. Leave it to Cecil.
Title: Things that People Say Taste Like Chicken but Don't
Post by: jough on February 04, 2004, 05:55:37 am: I um, LIKE Spam™.
Title: Things that People Say Taste Like Chicken but Don't
Post by: V-Adore on February 04, 2004, 06:58:25 am: I find SPAM* generally inoffensive, too. Even occasionally appetizing, provided I don't eat all that much or that often.

My mom makes a mean SPAMburger.

* The capitalization is to clearly denotate the meat from the bad e-mail. Yes, Hormel has asked people to do this.
Title: Things that People Say Taste Like Chicken but Don't
Post by: slink on February 04, 2004, 01:09:23 pm: I can't stand Spam. It just falls into the category of things that are too preprocessed for me to go near.
Canned things, I tend to like to avoid.
Title: Things that People Say Taste Like Chicken but Don't
Post by: pmcd9 on February 04, 2004, 02:04:04 pm: I like to poke fun at fake vegetarians, you know the ones who eat some meats like giraffe, but not other meats. Their rationale is that each individual has to draw their own line as to what they will or wont eat. which is perfectly fine with me, but for some reason they feel the need to be considered vegetarian which they clearly are not. So I would say that I am a vegetarian too because I don't eat people. You know, we each have to draw our own line. It's a personal choice. I'm still a vegetarian.

But now I find out people taste like SPAM. I may have to reconsider my vegetarian status.

~Paul
Title: Things that People Say Taste Like Chicken but Don't
Post by: CortJstr on February 04, 2004, 04:36:47 pm: I know a lot (like my SO) who don't eat land animals because of the slaughtering conditions. Usually because they wrote a report in school or read The Jungle or whatever.

So with some the rational is that seafood doesn't go through that slaughtering process since it often remains whole all the way to the kitchen. My SO just admits not eating giraffe makes life too difficult, especially in restaurants. Heck, she'll even take gel-coated Tylenol.
Title: Things that People Say Taste Like Chicken but Don't
Post by: V-Adore on February 04, 2004, 08:48:25 pm: I've always wanted to get into an argument with a "sanctity of life" vegan about all the deaths necessary to produce grain and vegetables for human consumption. What about the weevils, dammit?! WHAT ABOUT THE WEEVILS?!

A friend of mine once developed mock ads for meat-based substitutes for grain products, for those of us who believe that grain production is too cruel. The flagship product was Dread: "like bread, but dead."
Title: Things that People Say Taste Like Chicken but Don't
Post by: jay-ell on February 04, 2004, 08:50:59 pm: Quote from: "V-Adore"
I've always wanted to get into an argument with a "sanctity of life" vegan about all the deaths necessary to produce grain and vegetables for human consumption. What about the weevils, dammit?! WHAT ABOUT THE WEEVILS?!

A friend of mine once developed mock ads for meat-based substitutes for grain products, for those of us who believe that grain production is too cruel. The flagship product was Dread: "like bread, but dead."

You know, now that the Atkins fad is in full swing, you might be onto something...
Title: Things that People Say Taste Like Chicken but Don't
Post by: CortJstr on February 04, 2004, 09:55:51 pm: Where did JL's avatar go?
Title: Things that People Say Taste Like Chicken but Don't
Post by: AlohaDawg on February 04, 2004, 10:49:05 pm: JL's avatar comes back when I refresh. I don't have this problem with others - maybe it's a problem with the hosting of the image.
Title: Things that People Say Taste Like Chicken but Don't
Post by: CortJstr on February 04, 2004, 10:55:16 pm: I'm glad it's back. I like to oggle it while I post. If only there was a way to find more pictures of attractive women while I'm using the computer. Ah well.
Title: Things that People Say Taste Like Chicken but Don't
Post by: AlohaDawg on February 05, 2004, 01:06:20 am: Too bad it's not a picture of JL. Ogle it all you like.
Title: Things that People Say Taste Like Chicken but Don't
Post by: wombat on February 05, 2004, 01:27:28 am: Unless JL's avatar tastes like chicken, this is getting a little off topic even by my non-interventionist (or 'Please please please post in my forum!!') standards.
Title: Things that People Say Taste Like Chicken but Don't
Post by: CortJstr on February 05, 2004, 01:39:08 am: Quote from: "wombat"
Unless JL's avatar tastes like chicken, this is getting a little off topic even by my non-interventionist (or 'Please please please post in my forum!!') standards.

Sorry but pixels don't taste like chicken at all. Go head and lick your monitor if you don't believe me.

Anyway, back OT:

tofu (it tastes like sauce)
rabbit
quail
ostrich
McNuggets
Title: Things that People Say Taste Like Chicken but Don't
Post by: AlohaDawg on February 05, 2004, 01:42:29 am: Campbells Cream of Chicken Soup
City Chicken
Chicken-in-a-Biscuit crackers
Chic-o-stix
Title: Things that People Say Taste Like Chicken but Don't
Post by: slink on February 05, 2004, 02:11:08 am: Quote from: "CortJstr"

Sorry but pixels don't taste like chicken at all. Go head and lick your monitor if you don't believe me.

By tongue feelth funny...
Title: Things that People Say Taste Like Chicken but Don't
Post by: jay-ell on February 05, 2004, 04:38:08 am: Quote from: "AlohaDawg"
Chicken-in-a-Biscuit crackers

While I reluctantly admit that I simply love Chicken-in-a-biskit (they can't even be bothered to spell the name of their own imitation-chicken-flavoured cracker product correctly), they really taste nothing like chicken or biscuits. Just salty.

Something else that should taste like chicken and doesn't:

Chicken flavored ramen noodles.

Edit: Fear not, Wombat. I've just changed hosts so my avatar won't be flaking out again. Frickin' frackin' Netscape. I'll not sully your forum any further.
Title: Things that People Say Taste Like Chicken but Don't
Post by: andalucia on February 05, 2004, 04:57:21 am: In my capacity as a vegetarian, I am all about chicken-tasting products with no actual meat substance in them, as they facilitate delicious soup, and no sou-enabler can be all bad.
Title: Things that People Say Taste Like Chicken but Don't
Post by: Gimpson on February 05, 2004, 01:43:35 pm: Those Quorn nuggets don't really taste like chicken, but the texture is astoundingly close.
Title: Things that People Say Taste Like Chicken but Don't
Post by: slink on February 05, 2004, 03:04:16 pm: Quote from: "Gimpson"
Those Quorn nuggets don't really taste like chicken, but the texture is astoundingly close.

Is it? I hate the texture. I mean they don't actually taste like anything, but they're all, bleah!
I keep being fed it when I visit my vegtarian friend (why don't these people just eat fuck*ng vegetables!?) and it has this nasty wet, mushy texture. Kind of like, well like a softer Gnocchi or something, and I don't like gnocchi for their texture. Well OK, more like dumplings I guess.
Title: Things that People Say Taste Like Chicken but Don't
Post by: Gimpson on February 05, 2004, 03:35:37 pm: Quote from: "slink"
Quote from: "Gimpson"
Those Quorn nuggets don't really taste like chicken, but the texture is astoundingly close.

Is it? I hate the texture. I mean they don't actually taste like anything, but they're all, bleah!

Well, the one time I had it was in the form of "chicken" nuggets, breaded and everything. The texture at least matched the crappy chicken nuggets I'd had in the past, and with some barbecue dipping sauce I couldn't really tell the difference between it and mechanically separated chicken.
Title: Things that People Say Taste Like Chicken but Don't
Post by: jough on February 05, 2004, 04:54:13 pm: I had the "new" McDonalds all-white meat McNuggets last night, and I believe that they *should* taste like chicken, but don't.
Title: Things that People Say Taste Like Chicken but Don't
Post by: CortJstr on February 05, 2004, 05:38:22 pm: Quote from: "jough"
I had the "new" McDonalds all-white meat McNuggets last night, and I believe that they *should* taste like chicken, but don't.

This is a little sad. Because now it's going to be even harder for the noble dark meat to find work.
Title: Things that People Say Taste Like Chicken but Don't
Post by: AlohaDawg on February 05, 2004, 06:40:37 pm: When racism descends to the level of chicken meat, we are a sad culture indeed.

Fight the Power! Eat more thighs!
Title: Things that People Say Taste Like Chicken but Don't
Post by: wombat on February 05, 2004, 08:42:10 pm: Come to think of it, white meat chicken is one of those things that ought to taste like chicken but doesn't.
Title: Things that People Say Taste Like Chicken but Don't
Post by: jough on February 05, 2004, 09:18:01 pm: I'm a big fan of dark meat. I love to nibble on lusious thighs.
Title: Things that People Say Taste Like Chicken but Don't
Post by: V-Adore on February 05, 2004, 09:37:52 pm: Goddammit, McDonald's, who wanted all white-meat nuggets, anyway? White-meat nuggets are all dry and nasty. Dark meat is where it's at.

Man, now I'm getting bitter and pedantic about frickin' McNuggets. My life is really some sort of shallow lie.
Title: Things that People Say Taste Like Chicken but Don't
Post by: AlohaDawg on February 05, 2004, 11:26:17 pm: Who said the white meat doesn't taste like chicken? How is that true?
Y'all are getting some hella overcooked chicken is all I can think.

And McNuggets, like twinkies and moonpies, and circus peanuts, are NOT FOOD.
Title: Things that People Say Taste Like Chicken but Don't
Post by: wombat on February 06, 2004, 12:19:09 am: The white meat tastes like nothing. All those nasty dishes cooked with white chicken meat with no bones and no skin. Only in America, land of fear of fat and laziness about bones (meat cooked on the bone tastes better!).

I challenge even AlohaDawg to provide a recipe that makes boneless skinless chicken breasts taste like food.
Title: Things that People Say Taste Like Chicken but Don't
Post by: Limmo on February 06, 2004, 12:30:23 am: Limmo's Fake Chicken Picatta

two boneless skinless chicken breasts
flour
butter
1 tbsp capers
a lemon or two
two shallots
some wine

Alright. Chop the shallots up till they're thoroughly chopped. Put them aside.

Cut each breast in half. Throw some flour in a plastic bag, then stick the breasts in and shake it till it's a white Christmas.

Melt some butter in a pan. Cook the chicken breasts for a few minutes, but not enough to cook them through. Take them out.

Chopped shallots into pan with some more butter. Give them a minute or two. Put the chicken in. Cook. At some point, add the capers and a bit of wine to keep the chicken from sticking and so you'll have some sauce.

When you think the chicken's just about done, squeeze the lemons into the pan. That's it. Stir it up and serve over rice, pasta or shredded cardboard.

I used to have an actual recipe for this, but by now I can just wing it. And so can you, you're not stupid. Remember: if you have shallots, you can make good food out of just about anything.

Coming up: Limmo's Not-Exactly-Steak-Au-Poivre
Title: Things that People Say Taste Like Chicken but Don't
Post by: wombat on February 06, 2004, 12:39:12 am: I think that's true about shallots. I think the trick is that they make things taste like restaurant food, because restaurants use them all the time and no one uses them at home.

Now I want to see the beautiful union of these two current threads and find out how Ghetto Chef would use shallots and ramen noodles.
Title: Things that People Say Taste Like Chicken but Don't
Post by: Bozack on February 06, 2004, 01:28:37 am: The Ghetto Chef will eat the ramen out of the bag, without even heating it. The Ghetto Chef literally has no idea what "shallots" are. He would probably eat them too, as the Ghetto Chef is going through what may be his last growth spurt, and is hungry all the damn time.
Title: Things that People Say Taste Like Chicken but Don't
Post by: CortJstr on February 06, 2004, 01:48:44 am: But ghetto chef should appreciate shallots tastiness without pesky breath stank.
Title: Things that People Say Taste Like Chicken but Don't
Post by: pmcd9 on February 11, 2004, 03:27:17 am: I always wondered why it tasted so good.

(http://www.paulmcrae.com/images/Miscellany/Misc/DSCN8380-E500.jpg)
Title: Things that People Say Taste Like Chicken but Don't
Post by: slink on February 11, 2004, 02:18:50 pm: Crawgiraffe just makes me think of this.
http://www.penny-arcade.com/images/2002/20020619l.gif
Title: Things that People Say Taste Like Chicken but Don't
Post by: AlohaDawg on February 11, 2004, 06:36:16 pm: I think I've had Gray Cat Pad Thai!
Title: Things that People Say Taste Like Chicken but Don't
Post by: V-Adore on February 11, 2004, 09:01:08 pm: In pad thai, all cats are gray.
Title: Things that People Say Taste Like Chicken but Don't
Post by: slink on February 11, 2004, 09:15:14 pm: Quote from: "V-Adore"
In pad thai, all cats are gray.

In Thai Union, cats pad you!
Title: Things that People Say Taste Like Chicken but Don't
Post by: sjlimmer on February 11, 2004, 09:54:18 pm: Ah yes, where else can one find a thread with posts referencing The Cure and Yakov Smirnov, one after the other.

For what it's worth, I thought the sign meant Grrr, Cat Pad Thai. As if the cat were unhappy about the dish it was destined for.

But that could come from eating at a place called the Thai-ger Room.
Title: Things that People Say Taste Like Chicken but Don't
Post by: Nabubrush on February 11, 2004, 10:54:19 pm: Umm, I had gator one time and I thought it sort of tasted like chicken. Also, it's said that rattlesnake tastes like chicken, but I've only had it smoked. It's hard to tell what something tastes like when it's been smoked, to me.

On the SPAM front, Alaska is like the number two consumer of it per capita in the nation. I believe Hawaii is number one.
Title: Things that People Say Taste Like Chicken but Don't
Post by: AlohaDawg on February 12, 2004, 01:50:40 am: Counterintuitively, there is also a large population of Samoans and Micronesians in Alaska too. I guess they go for the climate? They could explain your Spam consumption too.
Title: Things that People Say Taste Like Chicken but Don't
Post by: pmcd9 on February 12, 2004, 04:43:11 am: Quote from: "sjlimmer"
For what it's worth, I thought the sign meant Grrr, Cat Pad Thai.

It's an ad for a cat apartmant. Cat Pad, get it.

~Paul
Title: Things that People Say Taste Like Chicken but Don't
Post by: AlohaDawg on February 12, 2004, 06:17:04 am: Must be for a Siamese cat...Cat Pad Thai!!

sorry.
Title: Things that People Say Taste Like Chicken but Don't
Post by: JorgeFabregas on February 28, 2004, 05:06:07 am: Quote from: "CortJstr"
rabbit

Truth. It tastes much more hearty. Of course, I may be some vegetarian alt.country asshole.
Title: Things that People Say Taste Like Chicken but Don't
Post by: pmcd9 on February 28, 2004, 06:44:40 am: Quote from: "JorgeFabregas"
Of course, I may be some vegetarian alt.country asshole.

That's my fondess ambition.

~Paul
Title: Things that People Say Taste Like Chicken but Don't
Post by: andalucia on February 28, 2004, 03:48:47 pm: Quote from: "JorgeFabregas"
vegetarian alt.country asshole.

*puts away Wilco CD and glass of soy milk; guilty look*
Title: Things that People Say Taste Like Chicken but Don't
Post by: Bozack on February 28, 2004, 07:55:07 pm: Quote from: "andalucia"
*puts away Wilco CD and glass of soy milk; guilty look*

Damn you, Tweedy! Damn you...for making me LOVE you!