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Messages - Cap'n Squeakers

Pages: [1] 2 3 ... 10
1
Achewood / Re: November 15, 2009 - A black freckle in his armpit
« on: November 16, 2009, 10:28:02 pm »
I, too, enjoyed this melancholic glimpse into the ordinary of Achewood. I liked it even more once I realized that the first three panels were not Onstad's primitive yet graphic rendition of Beef inserting his catwang into Molly's parts.  Until this realization I was living in a Cronenberg/furry nightmare world.

2
Achewood / Re: 9th October, 2009 - Todd sold your wife's deodorant to a creep
« on: October 10, 2009, 12:53:14 am »
Quote from: wombat on October 10, 2009, 12:45:22 am
I don't think it's fair to count a bruise and a hangover as part of your inventory, is it?

Well, in old adventure games the rule seemed to be if you could acquire it or give it to someone else, it went into your inventory.  I think bruises and hangovers meet those criteria!


3
Achewood / 9th October, 2009 - Todd sold your wife's deodorant to a creep
« on: October 10, 2009, 12:02:27 am »
Another Achewood flowchart, which are always enjoyable, coupled with some slight plot development that promises shenanigans.  Will Beef get in on Teodor's money-making action?  Will Todd date-rape the corncob? Whatever happened to Lil' Nephew?

4
Achewood / Re: Tuesday, September 15th, 2009 - What is some trivia that I can know?
« on: September 15, 2009, 09:40:52 pm »
Quote from: Bobby Isosceles on September 15, 2009, 06:58:15 pm
I don't understand why, when people don't like a comic, their first response is something like ONSTAD YOU SUCK YOU BEAT YOUR WIFE GO TAKE A VACATION YOU RAPED AND MURDERED A GIRL IN 1990 YOUR SUCK LEVEL IS OVER 9000 or something like that

Lick me raw, Bobby.  I'm sorry if my opinion isn't the same as yours or if, gasp!, it is negative. Is this a forum for handjobbing the author of a webcomic, or is it somewhere a dude can post an opinion.  Look at my posting history - I almost never straight-up say "Onstad eats it."  But, y'know, that's what I felt this time and I wrote it.



5
Achewood / Re: Tuesday, September 15th, 2009 - What is some trivia that I can know?
« on: September 15, 2009, 06:37:24 pm »
Jesus, Onstad.  What.. what happened, man?  This is the worst thing you have ever written.  I've read more interesting warning labels on cigarette packages.  Take a vacation or something, because you truly suck right now.

P.S. Seriously. You suck.

6
Achewood / Re: The nation will have to find some other conduit for fees to flow through.8/27/09
« on: August 27, 2009, 05:07:53 pm »
I think it would be great, on a number of levels, if this was simply the last Achewood strip, and the series ended here.  It's pretty clear that Onstad's losing steam, and he seems more interested in prose writing and flexing his dramatic muscles than in providing the rough chuckles and cartoon cat shenanigans of yore.  Having your lead character fade and die as entertainment for an almost abandoned theater is a nice metaphor for how he must feel about Achewood sometimes.  I know this won't happen, but a dude can fantasize.

7
Achewood / Re: EEEEEAUGGGGGHHHH! -- August 10, 2009
« on: August 11, 2009, 12:06:42 am »
My favorite part of this somewhat confused strip is the "OH GOD NO" that has been typed by Chuck Williams (a.k.a. South Elephant).  Tear his shit apart, angry lesbians.

8
Achewood / Re: play the trophy wife for the Veblenian maze-rat she is (07/08/09)
« on: July 08, 2009, 09:51:02 pm »
The cat and the alive stuffed bear are turning the Williams and Sonoma catalog into a erotic, food-themed version of the J. Peterman catalog.  It's like they are reading my nightmare journal.  Well, "nightmare" might be an exaggeration. More like "slightly upsetting dreams after eating too much sopressa while watching 'Weeds' re-runs before bed" journal.

9
Achewood / Re: 2009-06-10 Non compost mentis
« on: June 24, 2009, 01:31:35 am »
An Achewood strip that defines "phoned in," resting as it does in a Facebook-themed jape that would not look out of place on any of 300 other web comics.  Clearly, Onstad has not sacrificed quantity for quality.

10
Achewood / Re: 2009-06-10 Advanced pleasure machinery
« on: June 11, 2009, 12:11:23 am »
Ha. This one brought the funny; I am glad the poorly-drawn sheep from the last strip made a return in the service of chuckles.  But it is still undetermined: is the poncho still magic now that is has lost its tag?  Wait for several days and maybe find out!!!

11
Achewood / 30 May 2009 - Free wishes to the first dude who tells me where in hell I am
« on: May 30, 2009, 11:30:23 pm »
Ray appears in a flash of Mexican magic realism, lies to the natives, and is pelted with rocks.  Onstad gets a tiny can of Mr. Pibb for the AD&D-esque word "harquebus."  Although it is en vogue to say that Achewood isn't what it used to be, this arc feels like straight-up old style shenanigans.  I hope it ends with everyone losing some dignity and being slightly unhappier than when they began, and maybe with Phillipe getting yelled at.

12
Achewood / Re: May 11, 2009 == It Hella Bozazzles the Ganoggin
« on: May 11, 2009, 10:20:48 pm »
Other than some amusing catchphrases (Noted above), my big take-away from this strip is that Onstad thinks rapping 18th century Welshmen are much funnier than I do.

13
Achewood / Re: A Lean Pocket Cut on the Bias -- April 20, 2009
« on: April 20, 2009, 07:33:26 pm »
Quote from: AugustWest on April 20, 2009, 12:55:12 pm
The coprophiliac fantasy buffet...

The coprophiliac fantasy buffet that uses taco shells.  The vivid word-picture this paints in my mind may the most horrifying thing I've encountered in weeks.  A big ol' sloppy taco, all filled to the brim with Pewp[tm] (vegan fantasy poop substitute, guaranteed safe for dad 'n' lad), garnished with chopped iceberg lettuce and hard , reddish tomato cubes.

Zesty!

14
Achewood / Re: The blogs of April and November and May
« on: April 08, 2009, 10:07:59 pm »
Quote from: wombat on April 08, 2009, 05:35:49 pm
Philippe's Christmas list.  Awwww.

I hope he got nothing, and cried all the way until the New Year.

15
Achewood / 8 April 2009 - A room full of your wife's cheap antiques
« on: April 08, 2009, 09:53:50 pm »
A hark back to Achewood of yore, with Roast Beef sockpuppeting Onstad's hatred of bed and breakfasts. And who can call him a liar? No-one, that's who.

I wanted to name this thread "All no man in the world understanding the appeal of anything that is happening," but it is too long.  Beef is a wordy man sometimes.

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