That is so much pork.  We eat so little pork it would take us maybe a decade to get through that but a lot would just go to waste.  We are not pork people.  Except for the bacon.  I could get through that much bacon and just always having bacon on hand in such an abundant supply would increase my likelihood of eating it .

Recently, while being an adult at a job where I oversee a staff of 20+ people, my mind wandered and I was thinking "pork.  Poooork.  Porking.  He he.  If they knew what I was thinking they'd lose all respect for me.  Pork.

Also, I'm so disconcerted that the butcher paper on your meat is white instead of what I consider to be the correct colour of pinky-brown that all butchers here use.  What the hell man?  Is that a thing in your area, or is your butcher some sort of hipster maverick who uses words like artisanal to describe their process?

Around 15 years ago, I started writing something.  A few years later, I had a draft of a play.  It got produced about 10 years ago.  There was talk of it getting published, but then things went down where the people who said they were going to had a falling out unrelated to it getting done.  So I thought maybe it was done for.  Shortly after, I more or less stopped writing at for the stage or artistically all.  But then a couple years ago, the plan to publish in an anthology with a couple other plays came back to life.  So 10 years after production, around 15 years after pen first hit paper, it will be published.  Like I have a contract and it's really real this time.

I have to submit the publication draft to my editor next month and she then to the publisher a month later for typesetting and such.

So here is the thing:  I am not the person I was 15 years ago.  The person I am now would never write such a thing, so the person I am now would have to write a whole different play entirely.  So I really can't and shouldn't edit it much at all.  It would basically be like someone who didn't write it doing the re-writes.  But I really have to give it one thorough read through and light dust off before it leaves my hands, just to be sure.  Or at least to be familiar with it again before sussing out the details with the editor. 

Oh, and there is no money in this what so ever.  I mean like $350.  So is it insane to just use the writer's head-shot I had taken 10 years ago as the one for the book, because I seriously paid $250 for those and I have no desire to pay that much again for something that will be used once.  But again, I look way different now.  10 years older and a lot heavier.  Since the script it from a version of me 10 years ago, why not a photo from the same time?  Shit.  I don't know.  Like I was considering having a friend do a family photo shoot and maybe I should just tack on a couple shots of myself for this purpose?  It is the only time I'm ever going to be published after all.

 I wake up most mornings to the news and I think "Jesus CBC, why do you keep covering Trump? Stop giving him attention."  And then I remember, "wait he is the leader of the largest superpower in the world, I guess they have to cover him."  And then all I can think is that hopefully this lump of hot wet garbage will just die of a heart attack, but then what? Then what!?

Do not diss the Earl.  The Earl and I have a thing.

Also, the dietician at the baby group I go to says all black teas inhibit iron absorption, and she had some actual, legit articles about it.  But I typically drink my tea between meals, and she was saying so long as there's a 2 hours window between drinking it and having food with iron it should all be good in the hood.

You want an ocarina?

Hubby once got an ocarina for a kid we where going to be spending Christmas with, he we a pretty impish kid to begin with, but he was disappointed with getting a weird flute thing, though he was as polite as a disappointed kid can be about such a thing.  But then later, he ran into the room my hubby and I were in, put it to his mouth went "toot, toot, toot" then farted hard and loud and ran back out. 

Oh man, I wish I hadn't friended my mother in law, because now I can't complain about her passive aggressive bullshit on FB.  So I'll do that here.

I came here expecting a thread about me!  I was all "WTH? It's not my birthday..."  Inflated and deflated in seconds.

GWAR. I hadn't thought about GWAR in years. There was a cute little image going around FB of Bevis and Butthead holding each other and crying upon announcement if this guys death that seemed kind if just right to me. 

Actual stupid headline Underweight People Have a High Chance of Dying Too .  Ummmm...  I'm pretty sure all people have a high chance of dying.  I'm pretty sure most, if not all people, will die.