Hector: Mr. Hanna, what can I bring for you on this glorious afternoon?
Mark Hanna: Well, Hector here's the game plan. You're gonna bring us two Absolut martinis, you know how I like 'em, straight up.
[he gives Hector some money]
Mark Hanna: And then precisely in seven and one half minutes after that you're gonna bring us two more. And then two more after that every five minutes until one of us passes the fuck out.
[Jordan laughs]
Hector: Excellent strategy, sir.
Jordan Belfort: Oh, I'm...I'm good with water for now though. Thank you.
[to Hector]
Mark Hanna: It's his first day on Wall Street, give him time.



Yeah. It is a fuck you Friday. I waited in my director's office for 3 hours because he wanted to teach me a lesson about waiting for money. Fuck to the You.

AW: Re: Skunk spray. Did you know that cats can do basically the same things? If feeling extremely threatened they can point shoot a potent smell of urea and fatty stank oils.

so.... why wasn't the first question "Acap, who signed this?"

There were a bunch of these trick questions to make sure I was being truthful. The rest of it was pedantic explanations of the machinations of how loans worked at the defunct bank. I don't think it would have caught anyone's attention if he stuck to just loaning himself money. He got in the mud when he started loaning to every developer who walked in the door and the only payments on the loan were to him. Beats me why some dudes suck. Sure isn't my scene.

I got a signed Rand auto-biography. sure said had some sexy times. And some dope tickets to red lobster. (I'll be using the $5 check towards sushi. I will consume sushi at unsusustainable levels.

That is terrifying.

I guess terrifying means Awesome where you're from. Paul is already a meme, now he's a piece of art.

Re: Limp c*ck
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pEsZkTTgydc
Farewell sweet prince.

Most of NYC is dead easy to get around - it's a grid and the streets are numbered. What's so hard?

Wait till you go to Tokyo. Even natives get lost in Tokyo.

Yeah the grid falls apart at critical intersections downtown, though. I can generally find my location by looking at what avenue and street I am, but then comes 6th ave (The avenue of the Americas) or Broadway. Those obliques mess my step up and I just look for the nearest subway. (Subway NYC is one of the few instances where capitalism proved how dumb we are. There are redundant North-South lines built by competing companies, but hardly any East-West lines.) 

Anyone who has ever used mass city transportation knows that you let the goers go before the comers come. Because I'm used to his ritual of getting lost in hotels, it gives me a few minutes to grab a complimentary bagel and coffee. He has also been known to "forget" that he has a rental car and just leaves it at the hotel and shuttles to the airport. Our company has crazy blanket insurance that goes full bore automatically when we rent a car. We could literally leave it in a flaming pile of metal on the side of the highway. I assume the rental agency sends someone out to recover the car, but we've never heard any negative feedback. We're usually loaded when it comes time to bring the car back anyway, but on the occasion we actually make it to the airport with the car he has a habit of doing donuts around the giant parking lot where all the rental places are congregated. He then hands the keys to whoever tells him to knock it off, whether it was their car or not. Drew is a man who is merely a passenger on this planet with bosses that have no clue what it is he does all day. From what I gather from other inhabitants of the risk analysis pod, he spends 10 hours a day looking at spreadsheets that he has already programmed to automatically update his reports the moment he turns on his workstation and then he e-mails them out at the end of the day.

Me: Drew, I don't know what you do when we're not together. But the shit I see you do is beyond bizarre and without explanation. What is your deal?
Drew: I don't know, ACAP. Honestly my uncle set up an interview with a small DC consulting firm that was absorbed by our firm. So I just show up to work, then I go home and feed my cat. If I'm not working or feeding my cat, I'm just enjoying the ride.