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@achewood Jumping jacks, flinging myself off of low decks, yelling into an empty bottle of carrot juice. Trying to get in writing mode.

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Author Topic: Baby updates - ongoing  (Read 205286 times)

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jough

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Baby updates - ongoing
« Reply #45 on: August 25, 2005, 03:24:34 pm »
Quote from: "Achewood.com"
Current baby status, 8/25: Today the baby and I tricked a shop clerk and ran off into the fields with purloined horehound.
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foolio

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« Reply #46 on: August 26, 2005, 07:41:13 pm »
achewood, horehound, this guy knows some weird substances.
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foolio

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« Reply #47 on: August 30, 2005, 07:51:07 am »
Onstad wrote:
Quote
Current Baby Status, 8/30: Still no conscience.
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Doc

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« Reply #48 on: August 30, 2005, 09:02:31 am »
Quote from: "foolio"
Onstad wrote:
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Current Baby Status, 8/30: Still no conscience.

How do you think the big O finds that one out? Did the baby just do something bad to him or does he do a weekly test where he gets it to kill a kitten or something.
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Inev: 'A lot of things are ridiculous if you think about them long enough, you know?'

Bobby Isosceles

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« Reply #49 on: August 30, 2005, 01:29:49 pm »
Quote from: "Doc"
Quote from: "foolio"
Onstad wrote:
Quote
Current Baby Status, 8/30: Still no conscience.

How do you think the big O finds that one out? Did the baby just do something bad to him or does he do a weekly test where he gets it to kill a kitten or something.


The Bourne Infancy
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jough

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« Reply #50 on: August 30, 2005, 09:08:24 pm »
Baby just killed someone again and laughed about it.

That fuck*ng guy.
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foolio

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« Reply #51 on: August 31, 2005, 08:55:59 am »
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Current baby status, 8/31: Wore a pink hat and slapped the side of the dog's head
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side_show

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« Reply #52 on: August 31, 2005, 02:42:50 pm »
Quote from: "acoxcae"
Quote from: "Bobby Isosceles"
Quote from: "Baby Status"

8/23: Today I showed the baby how to polish off a tasty corned beef on rye.


If that sandwich was made proper, it should have been bigger than the baby's head, so teaching him to tackle it might have been quite the feat.

Go Onstad!

Corned beef on rye is a damned sight better than any strained peas or whatever I ever had.  Especially with dijon mustard.  Mmm...


side note:  I read yesterday that John Lennon's last meal before being murdered was a Corned Beef Sandwich.
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Null

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« Reply #53 on: August 31, 2005, 03:23:10 pm »
Quote from: "foolio"
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Current baby status, 8/31: Wore a pink hat and slapped the side of the dog's head


I guess Onstad has turned the writing of these updates over to The Baby.  Perhaps The Baby will start doing the ALT texts too.
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jough

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« Reply #54 on: August 31, 2005, 05:52:22 pm »
Quote from: "foolio"
Perhaps The Baby will start doing the ALT texts too.


ALT: Daddy could not bring the funny today.  We return Friday, because an Iron Chef marathon is on all day tomorrow.
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foolio

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« Reply #55 on: September 01, 2005, 08:46:19 am »
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Current baby status, 9/1: Tonight we got calzones and in hers the baby got “Lactoni! The Semisoft Breast Milk Pepperoni Alternative For Kids” (charged as 293 toppings)
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foolio

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« Reply #56 on: September 01, 2005, 07:09:03 pm »
On a side note, has anyone ever tasted breast milk? Is it good? I must have had some when I was a baby but I forget what it tastes like.
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Golfhaus

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« Reply #57 on: September 01, 2005, 07:19:08 pm »
Quote from: "jough"
Quote from: "foolio"
Perhaps The Baby will start doing the ALT texts too.


ALT: Daddy could not bring the funny today.  We return Friday, because an Iron Chef marathon is on all day tomorrow.


To be fair, if there was an Iron Chef marathon tomorrow, I'd say "fuck off" to work too.
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AlohaDawg

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« Reply #58 on: September 01, 2005, 08:33:19 pm »
Quote from: "foolio"
On a side note, has anyone ever tasted breast milk? Is it good? I must have had some when I was a baby but I forget what it tastes like.


Yes. If processed cow milk is your standard for 'good' than it's not good. It's got a strong flavor, kind of like goats milk.
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Null

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« Reply #59 on: September 02, 2005, 12:13:42 pm »
Quote from: "foolio"
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Current baby status, 9/1: Tonight...the baby got “Lactoni! The Semisoft Breast Milk Pepperoni Alternative For Kids”


If not for that "For Kids" bit, this would sound like something Pat would eat.

It is certainly in the running for my definition of "rather repugnant."
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