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@achewood If Twain were alive today, he would guffaw despite his benevolent befuddlement.

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Author Topic: Grocery Store Delivery  (Read 6527 times)

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V-Adore

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Re: Grocery Store Delivery
« Reply #30 on: June 19, 2006, 06:40:28 pm »
Quote from: Doc on June 19, 2006, 09:21:53 am
Also: Notice how when Smells starts to go off on a tangent that may reduce her credibility the universe kills a hummingbird just so she has another story to tell us.
KARMA.

My pet theory about hummingbirds is that they are actually immortal, only dying when someone can get a good story out of it. (My organic chemistry professor had a great story about a dead hmmingbird, see, and I've never heard about them dying outside of the context of Storytime.) It would explain why they're so bizarre -- who needs a functional biology when you only die to fuel urban legends?
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misterqueue

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Re: Grocery Store Delivery
« Reply #31 on: June 19, 2006, 06:44:13 pm »
The thing that always amazed me about hummingbirds is that, biologically, they should be completely unable to fly.  It is only through strength of will (flapping their wings really really fast) that they actually succeed in this.  Thus, they're also the only birds that can fly backwards (like a helicopter).

Knowing this, it would not surprise me if they were not fueled by nectar but merely by myth.
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So it's satire, is it?  Well that changes everything!

Lockjaw is serious times.

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Re: Grocery Store Delivery
« Reply #32 on: June 19, 2006, 07:21:47 pm »
Quote from: misterqueue on June 19, 2006, 06:44:13 pm
The thing that always amazed me about hummingbirds is that, biologically, they should be completely unable to fly.  It is only through strength of will (flapping their wings really really fast) that they actually succeed in this.  Thus, they're also the only birds that can fly backwards (like a helicopter).

Knowing this, it would not surprise me if they were not fueled by nectar but merely by myth.

They're like Elmer Fudd. Their ability to move about in the air is powered by their ignorance of it's impossibility. If you were ever to tell a hummingbird* that it can't fly like that it would look down and plummet like a stone. See also: bumble bees.



*in hummingbirdese, of course
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theinevitable

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Re: Grocery Store Delivery
« Reply #33 on: June 19, 2006, 09:18:13 pm »
yeah, well, the training was part of the interview. I know that much. I had to take a test at the end. mostly things like "if a customer asks you something do you A ignore him B help him or C go on a rampage with a shotgun," but also a bunch of cash-register stuff.

and yeah, it is straight-up my first job.
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Re: Grocery Store Delivery
« Reply #34 on: June 19, 2006, 09:21:52 pm »
It's "A," right?

At least, that's how they'd answer at my local supermarket.
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