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[colmore]

I think I say something like this whenever a strip gets a few 'mehs' but still has merit.  They really can't all be knee-slappers.  Really.  Since most newspaper comics pages suck these days, and the comics themselves aren't (generally -- there are exceptions) better, I'm pretty sure most of us read printed serialized comics in collected form.  This is a very forgiving way to read.  Flipping through an old Calvin & Hobbes book, you can read 4 nice but not hilarious strips in a row before you get to that one where he shaves his head, and the whole experience rings with hilarity.  Even on the newspaper page, if Get Fuzzy isn't too great today, maybe Beetle Baily is especially gay and that makes up for it.  But when you have one comic strip sitting by its lonesome on a web page, it's under a lot of specific scrutiny.  Especially if you are going for much needed distraction at your office job, rather than a leisurely reading over coffee or in your armchair / on your toilet with a dogeared book.  You need more out of that one comic, and it's the only one there.

Truth is, more than half of Far Sides, Bloom Counties, Calvin & Hobbes, Peanuts, Doonesburys, (your favorite daily) aren't hilarious.  Almost none of them are as great as your few favorites.  The 15 best Achewoods from 2004 make 2004 look great.  And this gets compared to the last 4 or 5 comics of whatever arbitrary week you happen to be in.  It isn't really fair to the current comic.

Anyway, as for this one... these books may answer Phillipe's questions, but they really only create new ones for us.

Also: I really love Phillipe.  The idea of a tyke being raised by a scatterbrained billionaire and his stoned friends is pretty wonderful.  It should be tried in real life.

[smick]

Bruce McCullogh did all his acid in Grade Eight.

Me... I'm a heroin pig.   I just gobble it up.

[jay-ell]

Also: I really love Phillipe.  The idea of a tyke being raised by a scatterbrained billionaire and his stoned friends is pretty wonderful.  It should be tried in real life.

With the current writer's strike, I really wouldn't rule this out as a reality show. 

I want to see a reality show like "American Inventor," but where all the contestants pitch ideas for reality shows, and the winner gets a budget to produce a new show, which will then be aired on the same station.  It's like buy-one-get-one-free for the networks. 

[jaydub]

I hate I Dreamed A Dream so god damned hard that if it were possible within the constraints of the physical laws of the universe for a song to explode and catch fire on the basis of one man hating it that song would be smoldering fragments on the interstate. I want to stab that song. Maybe it would be good with an actual performer but when I hear the opening words the warbly preteens come crashing down upon me and I can't withstand it.

One of the sublime joys of my life was hearing & watching a hated junior-high enemy of mine sing "You Light Up My Life", as tears of humiliation streamed down his face. 

[Arachno-capitalist]

Today we learned that Jaydub hated the fuck out of some people in Junior High. Fuck you SHANNON, FUCK YOU!

[jaydub]

I learned the concept of catch-22 in Jr High:  I had spent the previous 6 years living in Oz as "the foreign kid", only to return to the land of my birth to be called "the foreign kid".  Along with being in the 15th percentile for height, having enormous chiclet buck teeth, being a gymnast, and having a preference for reading over watching Dukes of Hazzard, there was ample ammunition for my detractors.

[KeithHernandez]

With the current writer's strike, I really wouldn't rule this out as a reality show. 

I want to see a reality show like "American Inventor," but where all the contestants pitch ideas for reality shows, and the winner gets a budget to produce a new show, which will then be aired on the same station.  It's like buy-one-get-one-free for the networks. 

What if someone used that on the show!?

[jay-ell]

They'd be disqualified, because it's obviously been done before. 

Or will have been done before. 

Of course. 

[V-Adore]

Today we learned that Jaydub hated the fuck out of some people in Junior High. Fuck you SHANNON, FUCK YOU!

Does anyone not hate the fuck out of some people in Junior High?

(Hey, Bernard? Ryan Middle School, seventh grade in '96-'97? I still remember you, you nasty little man. I still hate you inside.)

[theinevitable]

I was too socially oblivious to hate people, I think.

Maybe this one kid, but...
yeah, OK, I hated him. He was a dick. It was weird because he was not some random tormenter, he was this obnoxious proto-homo-kid that convinced the people I am now friends with that I was lame. Or at least, that's how I understood it at the time... in retrospect, I was pretty weird and lame. And not OK at talking to girls, which is weird considering all of my friends in elementary school were always girls until I moved to Charlotte in 3rd grade.

[Golfhaus]

When I moved over Christmas break in the seventh grade, a couple of kids decided they were going to hate me. Absolutely hate me. I had no reason why. My middle school years were pretty lonely to begin with, from having moved in the middle of the year from out in the country into the suburbs and not being used to it. Not to mention being really quiet and smart. Later in life, I reflected and realized that none of the popular kids really like the ringleader of Hatin' On 'Haus group either. So he was just picking on me because there was no one else for him to pick on. In high school, we both became more well-liked, and in senior year we were decent enough friends.

[linnea]

Does anyone not hate the fuck out of some people in Junior High?

(Hey, Bernard? Ryan Middle School, seventh grade in '96-'97? I still remember you, you nasty little man. I still hate you inside.)

I would probably fill an entire notebook, Columbine-style, if I listed all the people that I hated from school. It would be totally counterproductive, and it would make me have to go furiously clean firearms until I googled the top 5 assholes, and then my life would be over.

Seriously, the shit those kids did was like something outta Lord of the Flies. It was awful. I am still a tiny bit angry at my parents for refusing to let me attend another school. Finally in high school I changed drastically (got really skinny, dyed my hair black, and wore punk clothes) and started to fight back. The abuse ended for good when I scared a jock really badly one day. They were throwing spit balls while our English teacher was late to class. One of them hit me on the upper lip. Inside, I was terrified. I wanted to cry and run away because the horribleness of junior high had followed me to high school, and I was afraid that I'd never outrun it.

Then something inside me snapped. A badass version of me picked me up by the ear and hauled me over towards their group. I picked one at random, it didn't matter whom I chose.

I grabbed his collar and pulled his face about one inch from mine. Then I started SCREAMING everything I could remember from Pulp Fiction and Reservoir Dogs.  I just started screaming, and he was terrified.

It was almost too perfect.

Shaking with rage, I continued to scream until his entire group fell silent. If I had been a dude, this would have totally backfired, but since I was a girl, the plan worked beautifully. They never fucked with me ever again.

I'm going to go pet my cats now, and then wash up and go to bed. Fuck the negativistic haters. Fuck them right in the eye.

[theinevitable]

YOU KNOW WHAT "LIKE A VIRGIN" IS ABOUT, MOTHERFUCKER!? IT'S ABOUT A GIRL fuck*ng A GUY WITH A BIG DICK! SHE'S A REGULAR FUCK MACHINE-- DICK, DICK, DICK, DICK, DICK, DICK DICK. BUT THEN SHE MEETS THIS NEW GUY-- HE'S LIKE CHARLES BRONSON IN "THE GREAT ESCAPE". THIS GUY IS TUNNELING THAT SHIT OUT! IT HURTS, MAN! HUGE DICK! ENGLISH MOTHERFUCKER, DO YOU SPEAK IT! OH MAN, I SHOT MARVIN IN THE FACE! I LOVE YOU PUMPKIN!

I would be afraid of you too.

also, I definitely would have a crush on punky high-school linnea. in High School I was even worse than I am now about thinking that every girl with dyed hair or punky clothes was the coolest ever. And you're actually a nice, interesting person, so, we totally would have been buddys.

[linnea]

I would be afraid of you too.

I was trying to get at all the cussing in those films with that example. I didn't start screaming lines from the movies. More like trying to evoke the same stunned reaction when Jules is screaming at the guys who were trying to hoodwink Marcellus Wallace.

[smick]

And not OK at talking to girls

So, I was talking to someone the other day when I came to the realization that I've never asked a girl out, or propositioned a lady for sex.  That's a weird realization to have.

I totally wasted my college years.