The OFFICIAL Unofficial Achewood Message Board
Trivial Pursuits => People & Places => Topic started by: Bjorn the Destroyer on February 04, 2007, 02:21:57 am
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Hi.
My name isn't actually Bjorn, I'm not Scandinavian, nor a Viking. I come from the San Francisco Bay Area, and I work at a pirate store.
I basically have been reading Achewood for a long time, and it is hell of sweet. I look forward to having deep conversations over important things. It will be awesome. We will learn to explore the depths of our minds and come up with fantastic magical gems of thoughts.
Sometimes, we will be angry at each other. This is okay. Because anger is a natural thing which we can easily resolve by taking deep breaths after cleaving our axes in the skulls of our enemies but before pulling out the stuck axe from that person(s) cranium.
I look forward to having deep conversations.
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So, in truth, you are actually Bjorn-free?
Welcome aboard.
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A pirate store?
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And yeah. Bjorn-free. Oh the bitter irony.
San Francisco's only independent pirate supply store.
I suppose this means that there is also a chain of pirate supply stores in San Francisco, but I don't know where they are.
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It must be this (http://www.826valencia.org/store/index.html) because, having just an hour ago refused to believe there was such a thing as a pirate store, I must at least still refuse to believe there is more than one pirate store in any one city.
Nice puffergiraffe!
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A pirate store?
Oh, way to beat me to the punch on the incredulous disbelief front.
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No wait, even better: It's a pirate store that's a front for a writing center.
I'm so confused that I have to go to bed now, but not before I print out some of those "Captain Rick" signs and take them to work at the aquarium and post them around the desk of the person named Rick.
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It is good to use lard for making pie crusts.
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3-6-9 12-15-18 21-24-27 30
Now multiply from ten, backwards!
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No wait, even better: It's a pirate store that's a front for a writing center.
I'm so confused that I have to go to bed now, but not before I print out some of those "Captain Rick" signs and take them to work at the aquarium and post them around the desk of the person named Rick.
I work at said writing center as an intern. It is an honorable job that brings my house prestige. I am experienced at collating xeroxed documents, and making facsimile machine cover sheets, and making coffee runs.
Now multiply from ten, backwards!
I've had that ddogamn song stuck in my head for the last forty-eight hours, and I am on the verge of murdering an individual. You do not know what it is like to hear the times tables for the number three done in verse in your mind. Over. And over. And over.
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Somewhere in the ancient, mystic trinity I'm giving you both a can.
Or three.
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Hi.
My name isn't actually Bjorn, I'm not Scandinavian, nor a Viking. I come from the San Francisco Bay Area, and I work at a pirate store.
I basically have been reading Achewood for a long time, and it is hell of sweet. I look forward to having deep conversations over important things. It will be awesome. We will learn to explore the depths of our minds and come up with fantastic magical gems of thoughts.
Sometimes, we will be angry at each other. This is okay. Because anger is a natural thing which we can easily resolve by taking deep breaths after cleaving our axes in the skulls of our enemies but before pulling out the stuck axe from that person(s) cranium.
I look forward to having deep conversations.
If you pray to Jesus maybe he will retroactively make you a Viking. Then you can be Bjorn-Again
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Hi.
My name isn't actually Bjorn, I'm not Scandinavian, nor a Viking. I come from the San Francisco Bay Area, and I work at a pirate store.
Notice how he neglects to mention that he is not a destroyer.
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I've had that ddogamn song stuck in my head for the last forty-eight hours, and I am on the verge of murdering an individual. You do not know what it is like to hear the times tables for the number three done in verse in your mind. Over. And over. And over.
OK, I'll bite. What song?
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I think that I have heard of this place on the radio. Yes-m. I definitely have.
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OK, I'll bite. What song?
Three, from School House Rock. It's kind of a Dylanesque (as soon as I use that word, I think of someone's ear getting cut off) song. It was covered by Blind Melon (http://youtube.com/watch?v=7VDpVE6GMc4) and to a lesser extent, De La Soul.
It is second only to Mr. Morton in the Schoolhouse Rock musical world. That, however, is only a personal opinion.
"Mr. Morton is the subject of the sentence, and the predicate tells us what Mr. Morton must...do."
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I think we TALKED about this during the McSweeney's strip thread. Dave Eggers opened a pirate store too.
So now there's... more than one pirate store?
Also, as a useless bit of trivia - the company I work for built McSweeney's online store.
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"Mr Morton is the subject of the sentence-- what the predicate says, he does."
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"Mr Morton is the subject of the sentence-- what the predicate says, he does."
How does it feel, Mr. Morton? How does it feel to have NO FREE WILL?!?
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Is this the same thing as the Brooklyn Superhero Supply Co.? I've got a gallon bucket of omnipotence from those guys.
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It is second only to Mr. Morton in the Schoolhouse Rock musical world. That, however, is only a personal opinion.
Damn straight it's only a personal opinion! Mr. Morton??? That's not even on the radar. I'm talking Conjunction Junction. Lolly. Interjections! Verb (That's What's Happenin'). The frikkin' Preamble to the frikkin' Constitution. I'M JUST A BILL fagawdsake!
Mr. Morton. Faugh!
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Is this the same thing as the Brooklyn Superhero Supply Co.? I've got a gallon bucket of omnipotence from those guys.
Apparently not the same thing but... also a front for a tutoring center. It's a trend.
Dang, I really need some omnipotence but either their site doesn't work or it's this damn computer at work that makes you feel like it's, like, 1992 or something. Maybe I need to take that trip to Brooklyn I've been putting off.
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DANG they really don't seem to sell stuff online. How could you sell superhero supplies and not have an online shop? OK, maybe it's hard to ship a whole bucket of omnipotence but I'd settle for a small bottle.
Further investigation (frustrated clicking-around on non-superhero links) reveals that it is not just a trend but sort of a chain of tutoring and writing centers, but some are boring and do not have affiliated shops.
Why don't we have anything this interesting in DC? I might even go to a writing seminar if it were at a pirate shop.
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Damn straight it's only a personal opinion! Mr. Morton??? That's not even on the radar. I'm talking Conjunction Junction. Lolly. Interjections! Verb (That's What's Happenin'). The frikkin' Preamble to the frikkin' Constitution. I'M JUST A BILL fagawdsake!
Mr. Morton. Faugh!
That's why I said it was a personal opinion. It's a very sad story, the tale of Mr. Morton. He lives alone, with his cat. He's a very sad man.
(Also: Leon Redbonesque.)
"Mr Morton is the subject of the sentence-- what the predicate says, he does."
I mangled the quote, this is true, but I mangled the end of the first verse by conjoining it with the chorus, which you have quoted.
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Actually, the BSSco, the San Francisco Pirate Supply Store, the Greenwood Space Traveler's Supply Store (in Seattle), the 826 Local Monster Union in Ann Arbor, Michigan, the Totally Boring and Normal Store in Chicago, and the Time Traveler's store in LA are all part of 826 National, which is a non-profit organization, that (at the risk of proselytizing, I really hope you don't mind) is "dedicated to helping students, ages 6-18, with expository and creative writing at six locations across the country. Our mission is based on the understanding that great leaps in learning can happen with one-on-one attention, and that strong writing skills are fundamental to future success. Each chapter offers drop-in tutoring, field trips, workshops, and in-schools programs – all free of charge – for children, classes, and schools with particular interest or particular need. 826 is especially committed to supporting teachers, offering services and resources for English language learners, and publishing student work."
826 Valencia was the first chapter, and we are opening a new chapter in Boston, Sometime Soon. Some of the stores, since the whole thing is rather new, (826 Valencia was founded in 2002. We're celebrating our fifth anniversary all of this year with donated wine,) haven't been opened, but will be open later this year.
So it's not so much of a trend as it is a guided Movement, with Dave Eggers et al. at the metaphorical, pedagological head of it all. More Information (http://www.826national.org)
If you pray to Jesus maybe he will retroactively make you a Viking. Then you can be Bjorn-Again
I lolled
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<-- is miffed that they are no longer accepting requests for charters, because her city SO needs one, and she SO needs to run it.
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for some reason, I am most interested in the "Totally Boring and Normal Store"
What do they Sell????
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Spy gear.
Edit: to children.
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OK, I'll bite. What song?
Okay, I took forever to write this and in the meantime the question was thoroughly answered. My answer contains an anti-schoolhouse rock rant, though, so I'm going to post it anyway:
I don't remember what it's called, but it's from Schoolhouse Rock and it's a song about the number three and how you can multiply it by all numbers from one to ten. I think the chorus goes "Three... it's a magic number," which apparently is the slogan for the number three. Then all the cartoon children sing a times table enthusiastically. It's horribly catchy, and horribly horrible.
I really dislike schoolhouse rock, for aesthetic reasons and also because I think it's a really gimmicky way of tricking kids into learning. They could have made a kids' show which illustrated concepts in an accessable way, or demonstrated the value of the material by showing people using it, but instead they basically took a pretty dry list of facts and times tables and set it to music. A lot of the material we want kids to learn has the potential to be genuinely valuable and/or enjoyable, but Schoolhouse Rock just places a standard boring curriculum in the same room as singing cartoons, in the hopes that kids will conflate the two. It's like they're trying to send the message, "LEARNING CAN BE TOLERABLE!!! (if used in conjunction with tolerable things, like television.)"
The other bad things about Schoolhouse rock are:
1) Somtimes people perform it as a play, and other people have friends involved in its production and so are obligated to see it. In my days as a theater person I was dragged to such performances on multiple occasions.
2) It has a song about how great manifest destiny is.
I do like the Preamble to the Constitution song, though.
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Hey, I live in Chicago. I should check out that store sometime. I think it was the name that threw me off.
There's also a store called "Uncle Fun" here. Not just fun - UNCLE Fun.
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Well, like I said, the store isn't open yet. I don't think. You might want to call ahead and ask.
But, interesting fact, the writing centers with running stores (San Francisco and Brooklyn) get about twenty percent of their income from the retail portion.
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Blind Melon and to a lesser extent, De La Soul.
I wonder if this phrase has ever been used before in the history of the English language.
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There's a store called Seawolf Trading Company here in Fremont that sells hell-of piratey stuff. From Playmobil action sets to pewter tankards and swords (behind the counter). Dunno if its a covert creative writing tutoring service. Is this the chain store in disguise you alluded to earlier?
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Maybe?
I think we're probably referring to the crappy "pirate store" on giraffeerman's wharf that sells like a shirt with a skull and cross bones and San Francisco chotchka souvenirs.
Really, though, I think it's because we needed a way to distinguish ourselves in San Francisco, and we saw like five of "The Best Independent Bookstores in San Francisco" and were like really screw that. None of them can claim to be the only independent book store in San Francisco.
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The other bad things about Schoolhouse rock are:
1) Somtimes people perform it as a play, and other people have friends involved in its production and so are obligated to see it. In my days as a theater person I was dragged to such performances on multiple occasions.
2) It has a song about how great manifest destiny is.
Oh man, I'd completely forgotten about that song! Years later, one of my high school history textbooks explained Lebensraum as meaning "elbow room." Nobody else understood why I burst out laughing in the middle of class.
Back in elementary school we were apparently too dumb to watch any of the times table songs beyond five. We got to see six and seven once on "Fun Friday" in lieu of a real movie like Old Yeller or Milo and Otis. That's Georgia public education for you, though.
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yeah, um, I was in Schoolhouse Rock.
I was proud of it for like a week, and then I realized that I had just been in the most ridiculous thing of all time.
I was in 6th grade, people. After that show I lost the ability to sing for like... I guess at this point it's been 7 years.
(wow, that feels like a creepily long time.)
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At least you weren't in Up With People
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until at Least 10th grade, I had one benefit from that show-- I got an very tight red shirt with a big silver star on it. This was basically wonderful, and I wore it a few times-- including the time my first band played in a barn on new year's eve. I would have worn it all the time, except... if I washed it the star would have come off.
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I'm glad you said that about the star shirt, because... I didn't just get drafted to watch schoolhouse rock. I got drafted to be the assistant director for a production of schoolhouse rock at an elementary school... seven years ago. I'm pretty sure there were no awesome shirts with stars involved, though. So you were almost definitely not in it.
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oh, this was in Middle School. In North Carolina. So.
I wouldn't hold it against you, anyway.
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Well, that's a relief. Although the downside is that now I know there were at least two productions of schoolhouse rock that year, and that knowledge makes the world a slightly darker place.
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at least 3-- we went to see one later that year.
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Dear lord. That's like... one production of schoolhouse rock per hundred million people.
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until at Least 10th grade, I had one benefit from that show-- I got an very tight red shirt with a big silver star on it.
Could this be... the origin of Homestar Runner? Schoolhouse Rock? Do you think the brothers Chaps were involved in such a thing?
This could be the most important revelation of the last several hours.
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Boo to anyone hatin' on "Three is a Magic Number." That's a great freakin' song.
Everyone calls out "Conjunction Junction" and "Lolly Lolly Lolly Get Your Adverbs Here," but for my money, the one about pronouns is awesome.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hOaty7FpwMI
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Seriously, dyood. If you have that song stuck in your head for two days, straight. With no let up, you will become a serial killer who kills groups of threes.
Families of three.
A woman walking two dogs (or cats)
A man juggling.
Players of cutthroat pitch (by ironically cutting their throats, pitching them into ditch)
A man with three emails in his inbox
It goes on, until you have murdered thirty people in ten instances. Because 3 x 10 is 30... and then, you feel compelled to do it again.
WHY?
Because the ancient mystic trinity said so. That's why.
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pronouns-- might this refer to Mr Rufus Xavier Sasparilla?
I feel like that was my favorite of the songs I had to sing.
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pronouns-- might this refer to Mr Rufus Xavier Sasparilla?
Yes.
I'd make a sarcastic remark about how you'd know this if you had actually clicked the link I had there, but I understand not everyone has the time and bandwidth to view every single YouTube video linked by some guy on a message board.
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yeah. I meant to say that I was in a library and without my headphones at the time.
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Seriously, dyood. If you have that song stuck in your head for two days, straight. With no let up, you will become a serial killer who kills groups of threes.
[etc]
WHY?
Because the ancient mystic trinity said so. That's why.
I just saw this on an episode of Criminal Minds. Except without the Schoolhouse Rock song. And more serial arson than serial murder.
It was fucked up.