The OFFICIAL Unofficial Achewood Message Board
Trivial Pursuits => Wild Card => Topic started by: littlefallsmets on February 19, 2007, 05:10:06 am
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Los Angeles is the world's capital for women with amazing bodies but plain or ugly faces.
You would think that it is plastic surgery based? But this is not the case. At all.
It is because every girl who was the most attractive girl in her high school or whatever ends up swooping out here on a turnip truck, assuming that she will quickly make millions of dollars off of having a rockin' bod... only to discover that every other prettiest girl in every whistle-stop town's high school has come out here thinking the same thing.
And that at the end of the day, they were probably the prettiest girl in their school because... like... they just had a really nice chest display and actually were kinda weird looking in the face. Except, y'know, everyone in Possum Scrotum, West Virginia was just so happy to see a girl with a great rack that everything else is overlooked.
And pretty soon? You start getting numb to all the stereotypically "great" bodies that are, like, selling coffee and working as receptionists and... start getting crushes on that foreign girl with the sweet honest face working at the CVS around the corner instead.
At least, this has happened to me.
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I really want to live in LA. It is my birthplace, and I think the weather is permanently imprinted on my brain. When it is in the 60s or 70s, with a soft breeze and lots of sunshine, I get an irresistible urge to listen to happy 60s pop music. This is the result of My First Mixtape, made for me by my aunt when I moved to Illinois at age 4. It was comprised entirely of songs about LA or California-- every Beach Boys hit, LA Woman, I Love LA, California Dreamin', etc.
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She is the best place in the world to be up. She is one of the worst places in the world to be down. If Manhattan is a man shooting you in the face while cursing you out, she is a child knifing you in the back while complimenting your haircut.
She is where the American Dream ends and she is where the deep forgiving blue of the Pacific begins.
"I Love LA" was written about her and Neil Young wrote "Revolution Blues" about her.
Both songs are right.
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I have only spent a perfunctory amount of time in L.A., but I am horrified that anyone can live in a place where the air smells and has a texture. I'm sure it's a place of wonder and possibility and the like, but I was so disgusted by the air that I just wanted to get out of there so damn fast.
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I really want to go to a game at Chavez Ravine. (I like that so much better than "Dodger Stadium.")
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Seeing a game at Chavez is nice because...
It's pretty homey. It's not like most "Major League Ballparks" that are either... cheesy retro-circuses, leftover football stadiums or painfully out-of-date relics. It's like a giant minor league ballpark. Really good views all over the place, not too many bells or whistles to distract you from the game play.
You're there to watch a baseball game and the place is built as such... which is what it is supposed to be.
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Seriously guys. Screw LA.
I'm sorry to use harsh hardware.
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Oh, are we doing ANOTHER one (http://touamb.com/index.php/topic,415.0.html) of these (http://touamb.com/index.php/topic,1762.0.html) "L.A. sucks" threads?
So very, very tired.
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Well, it split out of another topic that was tangentally about Los Angeles.
But I wouldn't say I think LA sucks. I love LA, I'm just also acutely away of the downsides.
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I have to rep 503. Sure we have crushing darkness and gloom and...
Ok. I guess what I mean is I live in the geographical manifestation of Roast Beef.
It has circumstances, but it is RAD.
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I'm in your bus, Limmo.
I'm watching you, fuckers. Any stereotypical bullshit and I'll lay the sand hose down. Follow the examples and keep it based on actual observation.
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My wildest, most unrealistic dream is to live in LA. In Venice, to be particular. In one of those houses that are on those alley sorts of things, I forget what they call them. (Not on the canals, because even though this is a pipe dream involving a tiny shack that costs millions of dollars, the canals are being ruined so I don't want to live there even if I come into a fortune.) And since the house will be too tiny to have a home office, I would rent an office in this building down the quiet end of the boardwalk that, last time I was there, had lots of vacant office space, a little taqueria, and a place where Chinese people gave me a foot massage. I will bring my pugs to work with me - I can walk, of course, so freeways are not a problem in my dream - and I will have a window looking out on the ocean and write mysteries and never have to wear a winter coat again.
I do not see any downside.
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I have to rep 503. Sure we have crushing darkness and gloom and...
Ok. I guess what I mean is I live in the geographical manifestation of Roast Beef.
It has circumstances, but it is RAD.
Which Achewood character is YOUR city? Take our survey!
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My ex has a beautiful house in Thousand Oaks. I really liked it out there even though I visited in the middle of December. The weather was nice, and as long as you've got enough money for a decent place to live and a nice car you're set. I can't imagine running EMS in a place like that, though. Give me my small rural Alaskan town any day for volunteer EMS. In LA...man, I shudder to think about the sheer volume and type of calls that I'd get. Tons of motor vehicle accidents (MVAs), I'm sure.
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Apparently Charlotte, NC (http://www.joelkotkin.com/Urban_Affairs/WSJ%20The%20Myth%20of%20Superstar%20Cities.htm) is a hip new place to move. This article was pretty interesting, even though I suppose it wasn't anything new.
...I still love LA, though.
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My dentist is in Thousand Oaks.
The up side of Ventura County is it is safe and clean.
The down side of Ventura County is it is expensive and eerie.
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I've been to LA twice (once in 1989 or 90, once in '04). Liked it both times. But I wouldn't want to live there, or in any other big city.
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I don't really like L.A. all that much. I've never been able to successfully make it through the area (even as far away as San Bernardino) without being in some inexplicable traffic jam somewhere. As a city, it seems like it was pre-assembled with one purpose and then people were allowed to move in with some other purpose in mind. I don't know. Except for the beach areas, which have their own order of things, the city just doesn't make a lot of sense to me at all.
There are some really beautiful places there, but everything is two hours away from everything else, and between you and your destination are at least three people who are driving slowly in rented luxury cars hoping to see or be seen by someone famous. Although it isn't totally constructed of image like Las Vegas is, somehow it seems even more fake.
Of course I'm speaking as a San Diegan, so I have a lot of L.A. issues in general. It is between me and Las Vegas, and always slows me down at least an hour. If I'm not flying Southwest I'll probably have to land at LAX before I am allowed access to the rest of the country. It monopolizes the term "Southern California," and to a lesser extent California style itself. L.A. speaks for more people than it represents, and I kind of resent that.
Some darn good restaurants, though.
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I spent about 6 hours in LA. I had a fantastic meal of Chinese food. That is the end of my personal observations of LA.
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I really enjoyed the weather when I was there in December. I wish that I had been there with a non-Crap Dude. In retrospect, I wish that I had made him buy me more stuff.
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I go to school an hour away from L.A., plus I have tons of relatives in the general area, so my impression of L.A. is a city full of places where I don't have to pay for food. Compared to my issues with Las Vegas, my issues with L.A. are nothing. Plus, my dad made a sign twenty years ago that you can still see on the freeway.
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my dad made a sign twenty years ago that you can still see on the freeway.
which would be...?
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Apparently Charlotte, NC is a hip new place to move. This article was pretty interesting, even though I suppose it wasn't anything new.
I'm thinking about moving to Asheville after graduation, which is apparently a hippie mecca right now. It's a pretty neat little town, reminds me of my hometown (Lawrence, KS).
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I am going to be moving to Lawrence or Boulder or Austin after graduation. Or I'll stay in Norman, it is a good town, and I am in a great place.
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I am going to be moving to Lawrence or Boulder or Austin after graduation. Or I'll stay in Norman, it is a good town, and I am in a great place.
Boulder and Austin are on the list for me too. I'm done with Lawrence for the time being, as dear as it is to my heart. Where do you go to school?
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Asheville is basically awesome. I really like it.
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I got my undergrad degree in Boulder. I really enjoyed it at the time, but I can't see myself moving back. I would love to move back to Denver. I'm also dying to go to Austin, it sounds like such a great town. I'm a huge fan of Austin City Limits and SXSW.
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I got a buddy who edits a film review site heading down to SXSW this evening. He speaks very well of the place. Also, one of my dreams is finding a bootleg of the Tom Waits Austin City Limits.
I passed up on it once at a comic book show bootleg table and it is one of my greatest non-lady-related non-money-related regrets.
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I'm thinking about moving to Asheville after graduation, which is apparently a hippie mecca right now. It's a pretty neat little town, reminds me of my hometown (Lawrence, KS).
I grew up in that place. Asheville. It was not so much a hippie mecca 38 years ago, but I guess it is now. I go back there maybe twice a year. Asheville. It's an okay place. My family likes it. None of this information is useful to you, I am sure.
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Limmo, the sign is for some Chinese church preschool. I can't remember what it says, but I do know that every single time my father drives past that sign, he tells the epic saga of the struggle to put up that sign by himself in the dark.
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On what highway and where is this sign?
As I live in the Valley, I am pretty much always on the highway.
I basically spend more time on the highway than I do sleeping so that I can have a rent that I can sort of afford.
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I think it's on the 10? I know it shows up before you see the L.A. hospital but I can't remember which side of the highway it's on. I think it's on the right side driving away from L.A., but then my sense of direction is so horrible that I can drive into the one remaining snowbank in my hometown.
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Oh, yeah, the 10. All headin' into such as Orange County and Riverside County and such.
Two areas I go deeply out of my way to avoid. They pretty much aren't worth the trouble.
One of the best kept secrets of LA is that... pretty much only the nicer parts of Hollywood and the nicer parts of the Valley are actually fun to live in or hang out in or anything like that. Everywhere else is pretty much upper-middle-class boring suburban bullshit or complete fuck*ng squalor.
And, y'know, the beach. If that's the sort of thing you're into.
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Yeah, I don't go to L.A. that much when I'm at school, primarily because it's far away. But my family drives on the 10 a lot because my grandma lives in Monterey Park and we like to take her out to sushi in L.A.
I don't think I've ever been to Orange County or Riverside County. Mostly L.A. County and San Bernardino County because that's where all the relatives live.
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I'm thinking about moving to Asheville after graduation, which is apparently a hippie mecca right now.
My friend Bob 7 (http://www.flickr.com/photos/pmcd9/193649895/) lives in Asheville.
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Right now I go to school at the University of Oklahoma.
I will be graduating with a history degree in December.
I do not know what that is good for or what I am going to do, but I know I am absolutely done with school. Maybe later, but I cannot take it anymore.
I know I have a great friend in both Boulder and Lawrence. Both are planning on sticking around for a while. I know I really like Austin, but don't know an one there (only bad for the whole roommate thing) and don't generally like Texas (Dallas). However, where I live now is basically like a commune apartment complex. It is really small, really old, and really cheap. There are a lot of stoners, hippies, hipsters and other mixtures of young, cool liberal people living here, and I fuck*ng love it. However, there are bigger communities of those people elsewhere, so I suppose that is not a great reason to stick around. But it is cheaper and closer to my family. Regardless, I would feel like a failure if I stayed here, so I will have to at least move out of this state for a while.
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Oh, yeah, the 10. All headin' into such as Orange County and Riverside County and such.
Two areas I go deeply out of my way to avoid. They pretty much aren't worth the trouble.
Your ass sucks sewer water you fuck*ng import.
Come out here from a twin peaks/lake woebegon/hooterville mashup, prarie dog around for about a minute and cut down two areas you couldn't find the fun in with both hands, a map, and a miners light 'cause you've got your head driven so far up your ass it's coming around again like a funky ourobouros snake!?!
My stomping grounds have their good/bad dichotomy but I'll be double damned if some recent emigre gets a free pass to stick his toilet paper on the wall in my frigging toilet stall.
I called 'stad on this kinda utter ass-wipery and you ain't a lick in the clear more, turd monkey.
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Well, just so long as we're all friendly about it.
My aunt lives in Santa Ana, and I'm done here.
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Well, just so long as we're all friendly about it.
Fair warning was issued (http://touamb.com/index.php/topic,3450.msg83461.html#msg83461)
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Oh hell, I know - I think everyone around here is too friendly to begin with.
Fuck you. (http://achewood.com/index.php?date=01072005)
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I shall caveat for you, ST:
I pretty much hate everywhere.
Human settlements are pretty much only useful to be because they contain book stores and record stores and DVD stores and movie theatres and places where you can see a good band play. If not for these things and for the fact that our society sucks to the extent that we have to work for money to exchange for goods and services, I wouldn't leave the house much.
I would make my friends come to me, I'd have a garage I'd make short films in, a room in which I fucked around with computers and radios and when I was feeling REALLY saucy, I would go outside and swim in a pool ten yards away from that house.
At various times, however, my jobs have had me spend great amounts of time in Orange County and I can say from significant experience that it Isn't My Thing. However, if I over-generalized for Internet Attempted-Comedy Effect, understand that I was going for Internet Attempted-Comedy Effect and not making An Actual Claim.
A dude apologizes if Genuine Offense was taken. I have previously made mention of my Pulling Theories Out My Ass On The Fly.
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Thank you, ST, for saving me the effort of putting the smack down.
Also: "funky ourobouros snake" sounds like something you'd find on a 45 rpm single in a Salvation Army crate.
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Listen, a Dude just needs a chance to blow the top off some of his best wounded sailor curse runs, time to time. And like a sailor, it often times means about as much as breathing and occurs just as naturally.
ALSO: 'tween movies and fuck*ng FOX, OC has started to get the treatment that LA used to get the brunt of. OC and the IE are places mostly like most other places, with people and things to do except maybe more things and people than some more homogeonous places. Those people are about as much a mashup of differences as you'll find anywhere and they've brought just about anything you'd want to partake. You just have to look deeper than the swarms of beige trimmed housing tracts and find the fine shit this melange has brought out.
Yeah, LA's got some (more) of that too, even's.
Nabu's right (http://achewood.com/index.php?date=01072005) I proclaim this a fair game FUCK YOU Friday
I'm heading out to other threads...
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If a dude isn't willing to stand up for his hometown, he is a crap dude.
I live in Charlotte now and love it, but the Hampton Roads area of Virginia is my hometown. A lot of temporary residents there, on account of all the military, &c. Nothing made my skin crawl more than some punkass who had lived there all of two months proclaiming "this area sucks, <insert some big city here> is much cooler." Well, sorry about your luck, PFC Dicklips, but just because you don't get to pick where you live doesn't mean we're all here against our will.
Hampton Roads and Charlotte both tend to rank high in "desirable places to live" reports, and that makes me incredibly happy.
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Yay, I am in Charlotte right now! At my house!