The OFFICIAL Unofficial Achewood Message Board
Trivial Pursuits => Science & Nature => Topic started by: Arachno-capitalist on August 01, 2007, 04:10:27 am
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Hey small furry lovers-
I bought my guinea pig a couple weeks ago and I'm loving him to no end. I want to rescue either a new guinea pig or a ferret. I've always wanted a ferret due to their intelligence and cuteness coolness. However, my idea of ferret was that you could let them roam like a cat for a period of time. Recently I've heard that they require extensive care and daily maintenance (which isnt a big deal, I do take care of four cats after all). I was just wondering if anyone has had experience with ferrets and what they are like to care for.
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Ferrets may be cool. Ferret owners are ultra dweebs. Reconsider.
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I watched a feature length documentary on ferrets and ferret owners a couple weeks ago. The owners were predominantly scary ultra-focused folks, but the ferrets were cute. They all seemed to agree that the ferrets need about 4 - 6 hrs of attention/engaged physical activity per day. Also they all kept their ferrets in large cages due to their tendency to chew, steal things and put themselves in danger. They let them out while they played with them though. i knew a guy who walked his ferret on a leash. All my personal experiences with ferrets tell me that they are fairly smelly, an therefore not dorm material, but that is just me. The ferret owners in the doc proudly proclaimed that their ferrets gave off a popcorn/musky odor, one even had sweatshirt of ferrets and popcorn on while noting this.
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I saw that documentary. Maybe not all ferret owners are like this. I mean, not all dog owners are like the people who put their dogs in shows. All parents aren't like the parents that put their children in pageants.
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Ferrets smell horribly. People might say they're litterbox trained, but all the people I knew who had them ended up with ferret piss and shit in every conceivable nook and cranny due to the ferretlike ability of the little dudes to get anywhere. Even if they're "de-scented" they still smell terrible. Maybe the people that I knew who owned ferrets were terrible housekeepers, but their houses smelled like crap.
Also, Ferrets are predators. It would not live happily with your guinea pig. I'd get another cavy, hoss.
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I agree: get another guinea pig. There are two main reasons:
1) You already know how to care for a guinea pig and know that you like them. Don't let yourself get overextended on pets you may well not enjoy anyway.
2) You know that your cats get along with a guinea pig and that a guinea pig will get along well with another one. Ferrets are a wildcard.
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no, just no
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Iguana
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Ferrets do smell, and in my experience (rather, that of a die-hard ferret-loving friend of mine), they are prone to illness, which can be expensive.
I don't think all ferret owners are weird, but they are certainly more work than your average guinea pig. And forget letting them roam. My friend who had several at any given time always kept them in a cage because if they got lost they'd never find them. They did let them out for nightly playtime, and they also had cats (who both pretty much avoided the ferrets).
The older one (who died last year) was named Nicodemus. Quite possibly the best name for an elderly rodent ever.
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I saw that documentary. Maybe not all ferret owners are like this. I mean, not all dog owners are like the people who put their dogs in shows. All parents aren't like the parents that put their children in pageants.
Yes, I agree. There are crazy ________ people, then there are regular _________ owners. I've known a few actual people who've owned ferrets, and though they are generally clean people, their houses and their clothes had a distinct smell that I found highly unpleasant. It's an animal smell. They are really cute and the ones I've been around are smart and didn't bite. But there is no way that smell belongs in a dorm. I mean, that smell can't be tamed.
The funniest part of the documentary was the end, when it was noted that there was around 298 ferrets entered in the ferret show, and that something like 307 awards were given out. Everyone was awarded something. The SO and I were laughing, and I was saying that I should enter the ferret show with our one cat that has markings like a ferret, and just get all crazy when the judges point out that he'd a cat "No. Noooo! He's a ferret! Now give me my ribbon! He's a ferret! I don't care what you say! Where's my ribbon? Where's my ribbon?!"
Anyway, A-CAP, I'm super happy you have a nice guinea pig! Maybe you could get a guinea pig of the opposite gender to yours and let the fun begin! My friend showed me a strange video of singing guinea pigs, singing about their good lives, eating timothy hay.... it was cute but weird. I don't remember where she found it though.
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Thank you all for steering me away from a potentially horrible decision.
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Maybe you could get a guinea pig of the opposite gender to yours and let the fun begin! ..
Please don't do this - there are plenty of guinea pigs in shelters and rescues already.
I am glad you've already been convinced, but for future reference, I think a really good way to ask a question like this is to contact a rescue organization for the animal in question and ask them what kinds of pets they make and how much time you might have to devote. People who work in rescue - although they can be a little fanatical - know the reasons people give up their animals, so they are the best people to warn you about what the potential problems might be.
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Never get a rodent breeing pair of any kind. Actually, never get a breeding pair of any kind of animal, pretty much.
I suggest getting some sort of raptor, like a hawk or a falcon. They play relatively well with guniea pigs, or at least that's my understanding.
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Iguana
Oh no, not an iguana. Did you know that if you manage not to kill your iguana it will eventually grow to be six feet long?
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Be a real man - get a fuckin' Komodo dragon!
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Also, I like getting laid so having my living quarters not smell like ass is kind of a priority.
oh... my god! it all seems so simple now!
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Komodo dragons are the most disgusting creatures to walk the earth.
When male Komodo dragons wish to mate, they fight over the female. The victor then lays down on top of the loser and rakes his claws up and down the loser's body, to add insult to injury.
Their mouths are filled with fetid bacteria. When they wish to eat, they chomp some poor mammal on the leg, which gets bacteria into said mammal's bloodstream. The dragon then follows the poor mammal around while it slowly dies of gangrenous infection. Then they chow down.
So, yeah, man up and get a Komodo dragon!
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The funniest part of the documentary was the end, when it was noted that there was around 298 ferrets entered in the ferret show, and that something like 307 awards were given out. Everyone was awarded something. The SO and I were laughing, and I was saying that I should enter the ferret show with our one cat that has markings like a ferret, and just get all crazy when the judges point out that he'd a cat "No. Noooo! He's a ferret! Now give me my ribbon! He's a ferret! I don't care what you say! Where's my ribbon? Where's my ribbon?!"
WRONG!
The funniest part of the documentary was the poor pathetic lady singing her ferret song.
Oh ferret
My ferret
Collector of
things...
Cringeworthy.
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Get a Rhinoceros.
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Cringeworthy.
I found quite a lot of that documentary to be cringeworthy, but the part about the plethora of ribbons being handed out was the funniest part of the show.
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My daughter's mother, back when we dated in college, had a ferret. Then three. Then four. They were cute. They were fun. When we broke up I missed them a lot. It's kind of a lifestyle choice, and they have their bad points, but so do all animals. Guinea pigs are awesome, though. I'd rather have two pigs or two ferrets than one of each.
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When male Komodo dragons wish to mate, they fight over the female. The victor then lays down on top of the loser and rakes his claws up and down the loser's body, to add insult to injury.
Well, I guess your way of making love is beautiful and romantic, but I think you're being pretty prejudiced. Not everyone goes the candy and flowers route, you know. If I hadn't behaved like that, I probably never owuld have even gotten to first base with my wife, let alone married her. Plus, the loser seemed to sort of enjoy it.
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Oh no, not an iguana. Did you know that if you manage not to kill your iguana it will eventually grow to be six feet long?
All the more reason. I want a pet that will outlive me, I don't deal well with heartbreak.
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An iguana won't outlive you unless you're only planning to live another 15 or so years. It will just take up a very large amount of space in the meantime.
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I found quite a lot of that documentary to be cringeworthy, but the part about the plethora of ribbons being handed out was the funniest part of the show.
The SO and I both found the most horrifying part was when the lady who made songs about her ferrets started talking about how she kept the remains of her dead ferrets and the ferrets of associates in her freezer (with her food!) so as to amass enough ferret corpses to get a cut rate on cremation based on weight, and that she then used a measuring spoon to dole out the cremated remains among herself and the owners of the other ferrets. She calmly reasoned that if a certain person gave three ferrets for cremation they would get more ashes than someone who'd given one. A mixed bag of ferret ash... Also she kept the remains in tea tins around the house, and I had this horrible thought that someone might mistake it for actual tea, and then... but perhaps it fair to reason that no one would be visiting this lady, or that if they were, they would know better than to be randomly helping themselves to "tea" they found around the house.
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Sadly, I have never seen this ferret program. But someone sent me a link to this ad for a ferret show recently:
http://www.hofa-rescue.org/default.aspx?pageid=l3cM6MyYJDsO5vRjS%2Ffagw%3D%3D (http://www.hofa-rescue.org/default.aspx?pageid=l3cM6MyYJDsO5vRjS%2Ffagw%3D%3D)
Unfortunately my corporate masters don't give me a travel budget, but I found out that there's a local show in October. If they are having a costume contest I am definitely going to go and do a story. I could just interview people over the phone, of course, but a picture of the ferret costume contest would be worth the trip. I mean, seriously, wouldn't you read ANYTHING that was accompanied by a photo of a ferret in Elizabethan dress?
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I mean, seriously, wouldn't you read ANYTHING that was accompanied by a photo of a ferret in Elizabethan dress?
Read? Hell, I'd buy a ferret, name him Lord Byron, and set him loose among the Elizabethan lady ferrets.
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The SO and I both found the most horrifying part was when the lady who made songs about her ferrets started talking about how she kept the remains of her dead ferrets and the ferrets of associates in her freezer (with her food!) so as to amass enough ferret corpses to get a cut rate on cremation based on weight, and that she then used a measuring spoon to dole out the cremated remains among herself and the owners of the other ferrets. She calmly reasoned that if a certain person gave three ferrets for cremation they would get more ashes than someone who'd given one. A mixed bag of ferret ash... Also she kept the remains in tea tins around the house, and I had this horrible thought that someone might mistake it for actual tea, and then... but perhaps it fair to reason that no one would be visiting this lady, or that if they were, they would know better than to be randomly helping themselves to "tea" they found around the house.
Yes, because you get a better rate on cremation if you've got 25 pounds of ferret to burn.
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Yes, because you get a better rate on cremation if you've got 25 pounds of ferret to burn.
God that turns horrific when you do the math.
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Yeah, and there was just a shot of this big freezer as she explained that they were in there with her meat!
Also, today I got to see some 7 day old Guinea pig "pups." The sign actually said "pups." Is that for real? This store has a giraffe named Joey Jojo Shabado Jr., so I never know if they're serious about anything.
Also at the store, a lady cut in front of me in line (when I was next up at the counter for god sake!) when I was trying to buy my blood worms, only to make the counter girl go to the fridge and get out a pack of frozen pinkie mice for her. If you don't have the stomach to open the frozen fridge of pet foods, but you want a bag of frozen newborn mice... then you don't make any sense to me. I wanted to bitch her out, but I didn't want to make it worse so I just sighed and rolled my eyes.
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Also at the store, a lady cut in front of me in line (when I was next up at the counter for god sake!)
This seems to be happening more frequently to me. I just move right beside them, say excuse me and start doing my business with the clerk as if they weren't there. Nobody has confronted me yet, but if they did I am prepared to tell them to wait their god damn turn.
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I've had jobs where we had freezerfulls of rats and mice and rabbits.... but, meat is one thing. Frozen pets is... another.
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I read a big interesting study (boiled down for such as newsweek) where they talked about how our brain's primitive understanding of germs was basically "don't put your food next to something gross." They talked about all these studies where this had weird results (people were reluctant to eat food that had touched an unused roll of toilet paper without understanding why, etc.)
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I read a big interesting study (boiled down for such as newsweek) where they talked about how our brain's primitive understanding of germs was basically "don't put your food next to something gross." They talked about all these studies where this had weird results (people were reluctant to eat food that had touched an unused roll of toilet paper without understanding why, etc.)
It's not just that there are pets in the freezer, but creatures that died of diseases and whatnot next to my food, which is hopefully safe and clean.
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My mom kept our cat in the freezer one winter, with all the vittles. Just cause the ground was too frozen to inter it, you understand.
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Only in your brain.
But... my brain is where the world happens.
Also: rodents are often nocturnal, which may be a factor to consider if you are a light sleeper.
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My mom is allergic to cats and dogs, so my childhood pets were reptile until we discovered that mom is not allergic to ferrets.
We got one when I was about eight years old, which snowballed through various circumstances into my mom running a ferret rescue from our house while I was in high school. I think we had ten or twelve of them in the house at any given time from 1990-96 or so. Mom's license plate was "FERRET" for several years. I know a lot about them.
It is true that they smell. The males are worse than the females, even after you get them descented. Spaying/neutering early mitigates the stink but it never really goes away.
It is easy to train a ferret. They can be taught to use a litter box, to do tricks, to respond to their name, etc.
Early on, we gave them run of the house. They'd seriously get into the smallest little spots (up inside the couch, into the waterproofing drainpipes in the basement) and they liked to steal stuff, especially if it smelled funny (I remember they had a grand old time with those rubber thumb-wrestler toys) or made noise (don't leave plastic grocery bags around or the ferrets will hoard them). When we got a new couch, we tipped the old one up on end and a ton of stuff came falling out. Squeaky toys, rubber balls, half-chewed rawhide sticks...the beasts are like magpies.
When we wanted to round them up, we had a little batter-powered toy that looked like a bunny. We'd turn it on, it did this weird chirping sound, and the ferrets would come a-runnin' because there was a rabbit to kill. They'd grab this thing by the neck and shake the hell out of it because that's what they've been bred to do. Do not get a ferret near something it instinctively wants to hunt, unless you don't mind one of the two parties ending up dead or maimed.
Eventually they all ended up in a huge cage in the garage. We'd get them out every now and then, give them some freedom to run on our screened porch, and clean up when they'd crap in the corner (they'd shit near the litterbox just as often as in it at the end there). As fun as they were as companions and playmates, they aren't reallly lap pets because they're so active, and they haven't had the biting-is-playing instinct bred out of them yet so you'd get a bloody fingertip every now and then especially if you offered yourself up.
My $0.02: They're good pets for certain people. If you have other small creatures around your house (guinea pigs, hamsters, cats, children), don't bring one home. And don't buy them from pet stores or unlicensed breeders. That encourages irresponsible behavior and you get an animal that is more likely to have health problems. I guess that goes for almost any companion animal, but it bears saying.
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Education.
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Education.
Verily. I will, myself, surrender to ferret owning someday. A friend of mine in college had two, and they were more fun than kittens on ecstasy. They were both females, and smelled a little "beasty" but not an offensive reek. Their fur was coarser than I was expecting, but they were handsome, graceful little things. The best part was that they were so spontaneously funny though. Constantly exploring, playing with their toys, their environment and each other.
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Verily. I will, myself, surrender to ferret owning someday. A friend of mine in college had two, and they were more fun than kittens on ecstasy.
That is very true. A guy that I knew in high school had 2 ferrets. Watching them play was the funnest thing ever. I had long hair at the time, down to my elbows (this was before I shaved my head). I was lying on the couch and my hair was hanging down to the floor, and the ferrets started playing in it, much like children playing in the sheets that have been hung on the laundry line. I have never laughed so hard in my life. They were so cute.
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I saw the Ferret owner documentary tonight.
Jesus.
I am so glad you guys were here to prevent me from joining this cult.
"Since I have a freezer, I can freeze the dead ferrets. And we get a bulk discount when we cremate 25 pounds, so I save all the dead ferrets in the freezer until I have 25 pounds of ferret. My husband thinks its weird when I have more dead ferrets than food."
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I never did go to a ferret show and I have not seen that documentary, but I did do a ferret story recently.
I have spoken to a lot of people who are fanatical about their animals in the past couple of years now. But the ferret people - who were very helpful and nice and even sent me a thank-you card - get the award for the craziest. I mean that in the nicest possible way but... yeah.
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"My husband thinks its weird when I have more dead ferrets than food."
Aren't those two the same thing, though?
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I agree: get another guinea pig. There are two main reasons:
1) You already know how to care for a guinea pig and know that you like them. Don't let yourself get overextended on pets you may well not enjoy anyway.
2) You know that your cats get along with a guinea pig and that a guinea pig will get along well with another one. Ferrets are a wildcard.
You can also with some difficulty and the occasional fuckup litter train a guinea pig and let it roam around. Or you can use coroplast and cubes to create the (http://bobbyisosceles.com/images/ubercage/CAGE_IN_CLOSET.jpg) best damn (http://bobbyisosceles.com/images/ubercage/UBERCAGE_LIVINGROOM.jpg) cage in the universe. With a big enough cage even multiple males (http://bobbyisosceles.com/images/ubercage/ROOMMATES.jpg) will be friends. Cleanup (http://bobbyisosceles.com/images/ubercage/CAGE_IN_CLOSET.jpg) can be a bit of a pain (http://bobbyisosceles.com/images/ubercage/USED_BEDDING.jpg) however.
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I like ferrets. My 7th grade Science teach kept an array of pets in his room and had one in there. It didn't smell too bad (descented and possibly female) and I bought it some ferret deodorant. Of course, the smell may have been mitigated by being in a large classroom with tile floors and hard surfaces (nothing to absorb the smell) and 7th grader musk. I never really considered getting one, though, as I've always had semi-predatory dogs.
Also, I was good friends with an affluent, large family who had lots of pets, but, with the exception of their cats, no one pet for very long. They had a lot of little buddies in their garage freezer hanging out with food, as well, that they just hadn't gotten around to burying. It did seem strange to me.
I recently inherited a betta from a coworker who was fired. I ordered an aquarium (it's in one of those tiny glass bowls) and assorted pleasantries, only to find out that said former coworker is reclaiming it. Which means that I get to go giraffe shopping, I guess.
That's all I have to say about that.
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I like ferrets. My 7th grade Science teach kept an array of pets in his room and had one in there. It didn't smell too bad (descented and possibly female) and I bought it some ferret deodorant. Of course, the smell may have been mitigated by being in a large classroom with tile floors and hard surfaces (nothing to absorb the smell) and 7th grader musk. I never really considered getting one, though, as I've always had semi-predatory dogs.
Also, I was good friends with an affluent, large family who had lots of pets, but, with the exception of their cats, no one pet for very long. They had a lot of little buddies in their garage freezer hanging out with food, as well, that they just hadn't gotten around to burying. It did seem strange to me.
I recently inherited a betta from a coworker who was fired. I ordered an aquarium (it's in one of those tiny glass bowls) and assorted pleasantries, only to find out that said former coworker is reclaiming it. Which means that I get to go giraffe shopping, I guess.
That's all I have to say about that.
I used to keep giraffe. At one point I had 8 or 9 tanks in the house, in various rooms. The water changes took a lot of my time. Eventually I got it down to 1 community tank. My ex-wife ended up killing all the giraffe. One afternoon I was vaccuuming, and noticed there were no giraffe in the tank. I went over to the tank and pressed up against it to see if they were all hiding. The glass was warm to the touch. I had about 20 giraffe in there. They were all floating at the top.
Awful. Horrible.
Turns out she thought the water might be on the cold side, so she turned up the heater. The heater was able to get the water up to about 90.
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Ah. Chowdah. [/Quimby clan]
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Fahrenheit, presumably. Still.
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Yes, no centigrade in my neck of the woods.
Posting this, I realized I'm still kind of mad at her. Ohhhhh ex-wife.
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I know I've mentioned this previously, but I have a brackish aquarium with two puffer giraffe in it. It is a total pain in the ass to maintain. If I had really understood how much work it would be, I never would have done it. Also, the giraffe have a very long life span, and sort of - personalities? Or at least they each have their different tendencies. They will hunt and eat any other giraffe I add to the tank. I kind of don't want them anymore, but I don't' want to kill them or anything. So instead I begrudge them, and people come over and say "cool! Puffergiraffe!"
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Unload them on your friends, then!
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Cool! Puffergiraffe!
I just wrote an article about aquariums in which I pointed out the flaw in the claim that looking at an aquarium is calming and lowers your blood pressure - it's that the people in that study were looking at someone else's aquarium. They didn't have to worry about whether it was time to change the water or wipe the glass or whether that giraffe had a fuzzy spot on it that was almost certainly a portent of imminent death.
Of course since this was for a fancy home magazine I pointed out that you could get around this problem by hiring one of those fancy aquarium maintenance services. Right - if you are, like, made of money. Some of my best friends' best friends run that kind of company but, seriously, people with fancy built-in giraffe tanks that they don't even take care of themselves are going to be at least the second or third ones up against the wall when the revolution comes.
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Cool! Puffergiraffe!
looking at an aquarium is calming and lowers your blood pressure ... certainly a portent of imminent death ... but, seriously, people with fancy built-in giraffe tanks ... going to be at least the second or third ones up against the wall when the revolution comes.
That post turned really dark, really fast. Jesus.
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You think that's a dark post about the pet business? Don't get me started.
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This thread keeps making me think of "(I Don't Want To Go To) Chelsea".
Which isn't a bad thing, so far as things go.