The OFFICIAL Unofficial Achewood Message Board
Trivial Pursuits => People & Places => Topic started by: Asherdan on May 17, 2008, 05:45:38 pm
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(http://i.kinja-img.com/gawker-media/image/upload/s--k5m636Zb--/m5dvkzj95cd6xl0k4nnx.gif)
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I did a ninth grade report on Teddy Kennedy, and wrote to his office asking for some biographical information. A month after the report was due, I got the info from them. It did, however, include a letter that he had signed. The first "important" autograph I ever received.
So I have a soft spot for the man. Pull through, Teddy!
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Oh, so mean. I have had such a bad day. Can we not be mean to people today just because we hate their politics?
Tomorrow might work, though. I'll let you know.
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I'm convinced that the "murder" thing was a frame job, wherein The Powers That Be figured that killing three brothers with White House aspirations and passing them off as un-coordinated would have even the rubes of America calling shenanigans so...
Y'know. They had to cap his power in a different way.
But then, I suppose, I'm sort of a sucker for conspiracy theories that make too much sense.
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i was just thinking the other day...
in other countries when a president/prime minister gets whacked it's always by a really coordinated conspiracy of high-ups or generals or whatever.
But in the US we're so awesome that lone whack-jobs can pull off amazing whack jobs?
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i was just thinking the other day...
in other countries when a president/prime minister gets whacked it's always by a really coordinated conspiracy of high-ups or generals or whatever.
But in the US we're so awesome that lone whack-jobs can pull off amazing whack jobs?
Yeah, people believe that have obviously not watched enough internet documentaries. Did you know Bush killed JFK?
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Grandpa Bush?
Wouldn't put it past him.
Much as it would be awesome and romantic to say that... you know... some big easily-identified historical personage behind it, Nixon or LBJ or Castro or some mad Russian dictator... it was a lot more likely shadow-men like Prescott Bush.
Piddling oil merchants who mistook the breath of history as the wind in the sails of their coming-in-ships. War profiteers. Conspiracies not of sweeping world conquest but of short-term amoral economic interest.
No one Big Bad, rather a thousand blandly greedy Invisible Hands.
Those who would only be kings and those who would only beget them.
A conspiracy of buzzards, a murder of crows.
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uh
teddy survived a plane crash in '64. maybe he wasn't "supposed" to.
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teddy survived a plane crash in '64. maybe he wasn't "supposed" to.
Lets ask his colleague, Senator Wellstone of Minnesota, his opinion on the matter.
Oh wait, sorry. He died in about the most ridiculously obvious plane "crash" since motherfuckers thought that airplanes would look like helicopters on pogo sticks. So we can't ask him.
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I just wanted to see some the complex mental gymspastics people would go through over the sadistic bag of shit evil.
At least Kennedy uses his evil for good. As opposed to someone like McCain, who's using his good for evil.
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How about now?
Oh, all right.
But surely we can find more interesting news to talk about. How about the epidemic of escaping orangutans?
Associated Press - May 18, 2008 12:03 PM ET
TAMPA (AP) - Two orangutans are safely back in their cages after escaping from enclosures at two different zoos across the country.
At Busch Gardens in Tampa, Florida, part of a new exhibit is closed after a 10-year-old female orangutan escaped yesterday by climbing the exhibit's windows. Caretakers had to coax it into a back area using apples, carrots and vanilla ice cream for about an hour.
Meanwhile, 3,000 visitors at the Los Angeles Zoo were forced to head for the exit yesterday when a 29-year-old orangutan named Bruno punched a hole through mesh that surrounds his habitat. Authorities say he was free for about 20 minutes until a handler saw him in a holding area behind the cage. Keepers quickly approached the orangutan and sedated him.
Bruno never made it into the zoo's public area and zoo officials say "he was never aggressive."
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There are many angles to this story, of course.
Were they in a long-distance May-December romance, breaking out to see each other?
Are apes just growing more intelligent because of pollution ala "Kamandi The Last Boy on Earth"?
Is Bruno the most awesome name for an orangutan ever or is a better one possible?
I imagine that he looks like Bruce Willis except, of course, more human and intelligent than Bruce Willis. Probably a better harmonica player as well.
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I have a really big crush on Orangutans. Like, I think they are just such amazing animals. They are my favorite primate, I think (although Gibbons are pretty cool, if only for their human-like mating patterns).
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I have a really big crush on Orangutans. Like, I think they are just such amazing animals. They are my favorite primate, I think (although Gibbons are pretty cool, if only for their human-like mating patterns).
You're mom's my favorite primate.
I'm sorry.
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I have a really big crush on Orangutans.
... is the sort of quote that will be taken out of context and used against you if you ever end up in the sort of job where people do that.
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Daniel loves every primate.
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yeah, I mean, I have tried really hard to resist the urge to send them a letter where I say that I love them.
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Man, how would you even address that?
Orangutans, c/o Borneo.
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yeah, and I mean, considering they live solitarily without a set social structure, and in fact avoid meeting by having largely non-overlapping ranges... it seems unlikely the whole clan would get to read it.
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Maybe you could just give it to one and they could pass it round when they meet up during mating season, or they could all make copies and pass it to whoever they meet.
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hm, yes, this could work. The males have large, non-overlapping ranges, and the females have smaller ranges which overlap with each other in addition to those of the males, so...
oh, god, am I sounding like a stalker, now? I swear I wasn't stalking them! You just... notice. When you care about someone.
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Better watch out Inev, next time a female Orang overlaps into your area she's going to pass on a restraining order.
'Dan is to keep at least 500 yards away from Borneo at all times.'
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And then she'll say "Now that's a large, non-overlapping range!" and you'll feel so small.
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I'm convinced that the "murder" thing was a frame job, wherein The Powers That Be figured that killing three brothers with White House aspirations and passing them off as un-coordinated would have even the rubes of America calling shenanigans so...
Y'know. They had to cap his power in a different way.
But then, I suppose, I'm sort of a sucker for conspiracy theories that make too much sense.
I didn't believe the Chappaquiddick thing at all until I saw this video of Kennedy's explanation (http://youtube.com/watch?v=l0hdhLG0g6A). I don't know how you can watch that video and have any amount of respect for him whatsoever. But it's never nice to kick a man when he's down, so being from North Carolina, I think we ought to send Jesse Helms over to cheer him up. Maybe while they're chatting in the hospital, they can determine between them who is the lesser of two evils.
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But then, I suppose, I'm sort of a sucker for conspiracy theories that make too much sense.
You know, what makes most conspiracy theories implausible is that they assume a level of organization and competence on the part of the conspirators that we never see evidence of in normal human activity.
I mean, seriously, go work at a federal government job for a couple of months and then get back to me about whether you still think that the government could actually pull off any of the conspiracies that have been attributed to it. When they can hire an animal keeper in less than nine months, or actually come and change a light bulb when I ask, I'll think about worrying about it.
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The 2 fifths conspiracy horizon is rapidly being approached.
Even for a Kennedy, that's a lot of whisky.
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You know, what makes most conspiracy theories implausible is that they assume a level of organization and competence on the part of the conspirators that we never see evidence of in normal human activity.
I mean, seriously, go work at a federal government job for a couple of months and then get back to me about whether you still think that the government could actually pull off any of the conspiracies that have been attributed to it. When they can hire an animal keeper in less than nine months, or actually come and change a light bulb when I ask, I'll think about worrying about it.
But don't you see? The government's incompetent public face is all part of the conspiracy.
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I mean...
I don't really buy into any conspiracy theories, but the government has been known to pull things off well, and in secret. Like, you know, supporting overthrows of people and making stealth bombers and such.
I am just surprised that LFM thinks there is something more sinister going on here than "when you are the rich son of a family that is practically royalty in the US, and you fuck up, you will avoid responsibility, and get away with it."
Like, this seems like a narrative which you would buy. The rich man can buy anything, etc.
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If there's anything in the world that The Born Rich hate more than poor folk, it is Born Rich folk who betray their place in society by trying to help people be less poor.
Ain't nobody rich folk hated more than FDR, they treated him such as a "race traitor" and did everything they could to destroy his attempts to stabilize society by making people less poor.
Also: the government can't pull off anything because nobody gives them the money they need to work because everyone's always being a selgiraffe dick about not wanting to pay taxes... all the good conspiracies are funded by private wealth and just use "government" forces tangentally.
The same way the Penguin used muscular dudes dressed up like birds, y'know.
Bif! Bam! Pow! Assassination!
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But don't you see? The government's incompetent public face is all part of the conspiracy.
Really? I figured they were just incompetent because all the competent people are part of the secret shadow government that's behind the conspiracies.
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If you're right, I wish someone would tell me how to get in touch with the person in the shadow government who is in charge of replacing light bulbs. Because pretty soon I'm going to be working these damn snakes in complete darkness.
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It's a shadow government.
They don't use lightbulbs.
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If they don't use lightbulbs how do they cast a shadow??
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With the glow of their tobacco.
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You two are turning me into a can whore.
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So apparently he has a malignant brain tumor.
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"The usual course of treatment includes combinations of various forms of radiation and chemotherapy," they said.
..followed by embalming and burial. Not a fan of the fellow, but that isn't an end I'd wish on anyone.
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Yeah, at his age I might be like "fuck radiation and chemo, I'm done." Why prolong your life for six months if those six months completely suck.
(My opinion, I could be wrong.)
Also, when I see this thread title, I always think it's either referring to Teodor, or perhaps to Teddy in the Nationals' Presidents Race.
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yeah, it's time to break out the cigars and scotch, and ride the ride to the end.
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In the world of strange coincidences department, Mr. Senator Kennedy now has something in common with my dad.
So now, two of the 9,000 Americans this year diagnosed with a relatively rare cancer are people I've alternately hated and grudgingly, occasionally respected. One I love no matter what, though.
I've learned a lot about this condition over the past months, and one reason I'm trying to get back home as quickly as possible is to get one last Father's day in (and be there for my kids, too).
It's a tough ride, and my siblings and my relationship with my dad is worth a book or two by itself, so I'm sure Senator Kennedy is going through, I hope, some self-examination and trying to make things right if they need be. The prognosis is pretty grim.
My dad already did the Radiation and the Chemo. Now is the waiting part.
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Dude.
I just want to wish you well, 'dawg. My father has been in and out of the hospital for all of 2008 with no signs of a respite ( not with cancer, though ), and it just sucks to have someone you care about go through it.
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So, for closure's sake, my Dad passed on. It's been sad and interesting, my family has always been like a bunch of magnets placed the wrong way around and glued down, so we are always proximate and always pushing away.
My Mom is the glue.
It's a long and weird story about incompatible cultures and expectations, hard work, overt courageous acts, and reasonable success that may or may not ransom cowardly acts bred of inadequacy, history and pain.
All for another time.