The OFFICIAL Unofficial Achewood Message Board
Achewood => Achewood => Topic started by: vtopdorikimov on November 11, 2008, 07:55:19 am
-
This is brand new
-
Cool? Maybe.
But I dunno... that all sounds pretty damn exhausting to me.
-
This is a brand new squirting female orgasms movies, a hot close up of a dick in a pussy online and bouncy boobs with a sexy hot naked black woman. forumlans Come to watch lesbian hentai sex and free porn sample movies, also: Mr big dicks; hot chicks (compare with nude girls). It is real free. Porn clip comes real big, nipples go free, lesbian porn, lesbians, and milf redheads and blowjob kinky-porn. So, a couple of links : pantyhose gallery is nice, cum facial is hot, lesbians are sexy. Asian bukkake, xxx pussy, tight young females(?) with having foursomes. so Hoss dick in a pussy is the best.
Kinky lesbians.
[SNIP - OH JESUS GOD WHAT DOES THIS MEAN]
See ya.
-
Wait, you mean there's porn on the Internet? Sheesh, who knew?
-
Doc, I feel like you should have left them a "See me after class" note.
They can do better, if they apply themselves.
-
I thought this was going to be the new strip thread when I checked the board this morning on my blackberry.
-
That just means you're hard up for free hardcore strip action!
-
That must have been exhausting work, Doc. I don't blame you for taking a pass on the second "paragraph".
Sadly, I've seen worse from classmates in college - on much drier topics.
-
Cool? Maybe.
But I dunno... that all sounds pretty damn exhausting to me.
LFM, I am giving you a can. Dont say I never gave you a can.
-
Doc, I feel like you should have left them a "See me after class" note.
They can do better, if they apply themselves.
That sounds like it could be the plot to one of the vids.
-
Big fan of the shoutout to HP toner near the conclusion, there.
-
here is larry lee
?
-
LFM, I am giving you a can. Dont say I never gave you a can.
All that commotion.
-
If chubby girls don't like bukkake follow links. Want nude teenagers indian girls or hp toner? I can help.
!
-
I'm not at all sure this is the kind of board that wants cool sex videos. Dorky sex, maybe, or perhaps cool celibacy.
-
Dang, if we can make a thread out of this, imagine what we could do if we had a comic to talk about.
-
Maybe we could just talk about something else.
-
I ended dinner prematurely tonight by telling the story I read of a man being killed by a hoss cock. Theres a video on the internet if you google for it. Bestiality snuff porn has to be the weirdest thing I've come across.
-
Furry snuff porn would be weirder, I have to imagine.
A dude dressed up as a fuckin' Care Bear, convulsing and gasping as the last drops of life left his lonely corpse.
There are few deaths less dignified than a death dressed as a damn college mascot or something.
-
Dang, if we can make a thread out of this, imagine what we could do if we had a comic to talk about.
Conversely our threads would make great spam, if properly distilled. 100% NATURAL GIRAFFE PLACENTA!
-
Conversely our threads would make great spam, if properly distilled. 100% NATURAL GIRAFFE PLACENTA!
Seven Kinky!
-
What is this sex you speak of, and how can I acquire one?
-
You see what happens when you edit the links out of the spam? Who will help sje46 now?
Selgiraffe, selgiraffe, selgiraffe.
-
You see what happens when you edit the links out of the spam? Who will help sje46 now?
Selgiraffe, selgiraffe, selgiraffe.
I guess hell have to jack off to porn he didn't find on a web comic message board.
-
I guess hell have to jack off to porn he didn't find on a web comic message board.
Wait, there's porn on the interent now?
-
What is this sex you speak of, and how can I acquire one?
I recommend always wearing Achewood shirts while trying to pick up the ladies. Any girl who isn't down with Roast Beef isn't worth sexin' anyway.
-
Conversely, as a lady, I got tired of everyone staring at my tits/rabbit ambulance image. The stares were always just slightly too lengthy to be trusted.
-
Conversely, as a lady, I got tired of everyone staring at my tits/rabbit ambulance image. The stares were always just slightly too lengthy to be trusted.
Do females always assume lechery in this circumstance? Sometimes I just want to read your shirt damnit.
-
I think I probably don't need to post to say I worry about this a lot.
But I do tend to do a lot of oops-i-drifted-off-and-you-just-noticed-i-was-staring-at-you. So I guess I get what I deserve.
-
Do females always assume lechery in this circumstance? Sometimes I just want to read your shirt damnit.
I always figure that if there is writing on my shirt, I have to give the benefit of the doubt. Some people are just slow readers.
-
Slow, gently salivating, visibly aroused readers.
-
It's all about the benefit-of-the-doubt linger.
Some women wear words on their tits specifically because they like allowing that, though.
The benefit-of-the-doubt linger goes both ways. Lecher OR exhibitionist, you know?
-
With me (and that shirt in particular) it has always been the men pointing out they have been staring at my chest, but you know, embarrassedly saying "It's the image on your shirt." This has happened with five separate men, one being a total stranger, one having apologized for it more than once. To the stranger I was like "sure dude, it's the T-shirt." To all the other men, they've all been friends and I 've never had any inkling of piggishness from them. For all but one of them, it's probably the only time I've even felt a gender divide of any kind. It's an easy-to-stare-at image, and then I think the men who do (always in a work environment, in an off-focused, far away state that they snap out of) have a split second where they realize there are tits behind that t-shirt and they they've crossed their own arbitrary line of how much time one should stare at a woman's chestular area, and get all embarrassed and have to explain. I've actually had the same issues with a Gandhi t-shirt I have, which leads to the weirdest men needing to let me know they really like Gandhi. "No, cool shirt! I really like Gandhi."
I am almost totally oblivious to tit-staring, and it's only when dudes I know get all embarrassed that I realize it may have been happening.
-
I am more worried about getting noticed staring at a not-butt-or-breasts body part.
"Um, are you staring at my... hair?"
One time in high school I got accused, loudly, of staring at a girl's feet in class... I never heard the end of it.
-
I don't want to shatter any illusions but, uhm, no.
We never not for a second forget that they're tits.
Maybe if the guy's gay or a relation, he's thinking about how weird it is that he's the only one in the room not thinking that they're tits but...
Even then, indirectly.
We're awful terrible one-track creatures and I swear to God we can't help it and there are evolutionary reasons why we are like this that were completely useful back when we were in trees and caves and... yeah, no, yeah. That's how it is. Birds gotta fly, giraffe gotta swim, guys gotta know they're tits.
-
I believe gender determinants are mostly arbitrary, and the same goes for the sexual orientation scale (Kinsey doesn't even begin to cover the million shades of gray), so for me that whole "all men do ________" and "all women do ________" thing never rings true, 'cause there ain't no lines there but the arbitrary ones we impose on ourselves and others.
When it comes to me, I enjoy the women's locker room, and look for as long as I can get away with, which is not very long at all. Same goes for dick prints through ##### - I mean, I could just stare and stare, and sometimes I see one so incredible that I just want to say something, but I don't want to objectify anyone just because I like the look of them- that's just disrespectful. Do I avert my eyes, and try to think pure thoughts.
-
i am not going to make so strong a statement as mel, but, yes.
there are some big assumptions going on there.
-
Might I have exaggerated? Sure.
However. If there's anything close to an "all" it is a straight man's tit-focus.
Even when a man sees tits he is not into, instead of just looking away, he just thinks "oh man, those tits are not rude at all. those are some polite titties" and keeps looking.
-
see. again.
just not true.
-
daniel doesn't love every boob
-
daniel doesn't love every boob
...or more precisely, LMF loves every boob, and can't imagine why the rest of the category he assigns himself to wouldn't. It's a reasonable assumption, when you think about it, like how some times a parent, due to love, can imagine that there has never been any child cuter than theres - that is a deep, meaningful love. This is how much LFM loves tits. Being the owner of a nice set, I can't say I disapprove, though I know it's not the case. My tits are sexy to some, not to all. For if they were awesome to all, I would rule the world! The World! THE WOOOOOOOORLD! Ha ha ha ha!
-
Someone has to, might as well be me (http://achewood.com/index.php?date=02222007).
I'm a self-professed leg man, but still, I don't want to know a man who doesn't like titties. Unless they're gay. That's the only excuse.
Actually, fuck that, that's not an excuse either. I've seen way too many gay men that get their hands on breasts more often than the chick who runs the mammogram squishy thing. Just because you like dick don't mean you can't love the tits too.
-
but I don't want to objectify anyone just because I like the look of them- that's just disrespectful.
I'm not singling you out here Smells, cause I know this is a widely accepted truth. But why is that? Why is it wrong/disrespectful to objectify someone. To look at them as a highly attractive piece of meat? Yes, I think you have a beautiful body. That does not mean I think anything less of you. It has no further implications. You have a great body. You may or may not also have a great mind, great personality or other great personal aspects.
I would not be rude if I said to a smart person "Hey, you've got a brilliant mind." Why is it wrong to say (or think, or imply by ogling) "Hey, you've got a beautiful body?"
Not that I'd ever say anything like that, being hopelessly repressed.
-
I would not be rude if I said to a smart person "Hey, you've got a brilliant mind." Why is it wrong to say (or think, or imply by ogling) "Hey, you've got a beautiful body?"
I think the short answer to that question might be, historical context. You can't tell a woman she's got a beautiful body because for so many centuries no one thought a woman had a great mind.
But, you know, maybe someday.
-
wombat you have a beautiful ______
edit: wow is that a new filter
-
Mr. West once again succinctly summarises my feelings.
Boobs are a bit over-focussed on though. My housemate always seems to describe female attractiveness in terms of boob size and I just can't get into it. There's certainly a point where boobs are too big for my liking.
We were discussing a female I was attracted to who was of the spunky, petite variety and he said he didn't understand how I found her attractive because she 'looked like a 12 year old boy' to which I had no articulatable response. I mean seriously? Maybe this is a result of a general over emphasis on subtlety and nuance on my part (as in liking it, not necessarily being able to produce it) but I've always enjoyed ladies who aren't as well endowed but are more... lithe I think would be a good word?
Summary: I like boobs but I don't want to mack on something the size of my head.
-
AW is wise. I've long wished there was a way to tell a strange woman she's attractive without seeming creepy or offensive (or having her be drunk).
-
AW is wise. I've long wished there was a way to tell a strange woman she's attractive without seeming creepy or offensive (or having her be drunk).
I propose we make the official non-creepy way to do this to be "pointing at the girl with finger-guns from both hands and making a Fonzie-like 'Eyyyyyyyyy!' sound."
Disclaimer: may actually be creepy.
-
I propose we make the official non-creepy way to do this to be "pointing at the girl with finger-guns from both hands and making a Fonzie-like 'Eyyyyyyyyy!' sound."
Kind of like this?
(http://www.theage.com.au/ffximage/2006/11/01/wiggles_narrowweb__300x454,0.jpg)
-
Why do they look like they're from a Star Trek episode with no budget at all?
Was this a conscious costuming choice?
-
I forget sometimes that not everyone watches kids' TV.
-
Kind of like this?
(http://www.theage.com.au/ffximage/2006/11/01/wiggles_narrowweb__300x454,0.jpg)
See? What's not to like about that?
-
I feel very attractive all of a sudden.
-
Actually, part of why the Wiggles always pose like that, particularly when having pictures taken with little kids, is so that there is no question about where their hands are.
-
The Wiggles + some multi legged purple sperm thing (back right corner) sing about how awesome colors are. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N6sm2MWY9x4&NR=1)
Holy God
-
Doc--
I, too, do not really get that whole deal.
My friends make fun of me for such as:
"I think Laura is really cute... don't you just love her nose?"
"Rachel just has such beautiful hair, you know?"
Luckily, I think hair is a thing you can compliment girls on without being creepy? Hopefully?
-
yes.
I think until I overdo it, they will think it is not at all related to wanting to smooch them.
Whereas "you have a beautiful body" is very similar to "I would like to f*** you, I would f*** you for hours."
-
Luckily, I think hair is a thing you can compliment girls on without being creepy? Hopefully?
I think it is a thing you can think is beautiful (I had a really weird experience a little while ago sitting behind someone on a bus and thinking their hair and the the kind of odd angle of their profile I could see was really pretty and then was very embarrassed when they turned around and it was a friend of mine and I hadn't realised because they'd just had a haircut) but I'm not sure it's something I would compliment someone on, at least not as an opening line. Seems just slightly odd.
Maybe 'I like your hair' but not 'your hair is beautiful' because that basically sounds like 'I would like to fuck your hair, I would fuck it for hours.'
-
Don't judge my kink man.
-
I would not be rude if I said to a smart person "Hey, you've got a brilliant mind." Why is it wrong to say (or think, or imply by ogling) "Hey, you've got a beautiful body?"
I know that this is not the scenario you're talking about but bear with me here, cause this one goes all the way around: I think either of these statements, if said to a total stranger, is creepy in its over familiarity, and that it takes time and a foundation of understanding before one's opinions of another aren't based on untested assumptions. It's about healthy boundaries. At a certain point in knowing someone, platonically or otherwise, it becomes okay to have emotional intimacy, and conveniently enough, this time often comes ones you've figured out the persons nature and sensabilities, where as, if I see a hot lady in the locker room who I've never met before and say " I really admire your breasts" that is not appropriate or healthy behavior. When you look at kids with FASD for example, these kids have a total lack of boundaries, which often makes them incredibly loveable - they'll slather you with compliments, and both ask and assert intimate things about a person they've just met. This seems all well and good, but then kids with this disorder have a staggeringly higher rate of being sexually exploited. Due to the same lack of boundaries.
So we have the one scenario, which is a "you don't know me, you don't have the right to cross that line" thing.
Then there's the other one.
What I'm coming around to is this: once you know someone well enough to say you actually care about them (platonically or otherwise) you should be able to compliment them on any aspect of who they are, but damn if this isn't always possible. You can know a lady, know her really well, have a caring friendship (or more) with her, and say something genuine about why you appreciate her. The thing you say may be complimentary to her physical appearance, or sometimes even her mind, and that woman might be glad for it or instead be hurt by it, get upset and not be okay with that. Why? Lots of ladies have dealt with a lifetime, or even generational damage. She may have had a mom, a boyfriend, a brother, a teacher, whoever, who shoved a hot poker right into the core of her self esteem. Which is often, when it comes to ladies, rooted in an attack on her physical appearance. Many ladies walk around with a perminant sore spot that may be even too painful or too deep to even acknowledge, that has cause them to be off kilter with boundaries in the other direction. Where some ladies struggle against letting kindness in, and where kind words can even hurt like a slap in the face. That Bruce Springsteen song "Secret Garden" touches on it really well. There are certain places within some women, that they may never be able to allow a man to access, even if he is indeed kind, loving and everything wonderful. You can be (and I know many of you guys are) genuine and true and lovely, but in a situation as immediately as her last or current relationship with someone else, a women can totally hate a part of herself so much that she'll hate you for loving it. Or in a situation as far away as her great grandmother's generation, something horrible might have happened to women in her family, done to a woman by a man in a time where a woman was a piece of property, and beating the shit out of her, raping her, whatever, was allowable. Then that great grandmother bread a distrust of all men into her daughter, who passed it on to her daughter, who passed it on to the beautiful woman in front of you.
It is the wreckage of gender. Like race, it's the rigid divides and all the crap that came with it that makes it hard for people on both sides to now know how to start again. In North America, I believe we live in a time of hope, because we're a ruling generation beyond starting to see those divides as false now. This isn't to say crimes based on gender and race aren't happening as I write this, but really, really, I think we're coming to a point within history where we're actually acknowledge arbitrary divides as arbitrary and that's exciting to me.
-
1) I just realized how this thread started, and that is so rad that it turned into a dissertation on gender divide.
2) If you want to see a spectacular example horrifyingly asexual children's entertainment (off topic topics converging slightly no?) take a look at 4 Square (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1PyaGm204u8). I know a parent who told me this was clearly really brainwashing for the military, and everyone who has a toddler agrees. Also, I know the secret of the foam dick pads. They do exist, and are worn here.
-
It makes absolutely no sense that the women in that clip have a skirt to cover up their tights when foam dick pads are on full display.
Also, yeah that is weird with all the 'Hup!'s and so on. Also they should not try to make two syllable names into three syllable names.
-
Also, yeah that is weird with all the 'Hup!'s and so on. Also they should not try to make two syllable names into three syllable names.
Ru-fu-ssss and Ha-pet-te are obviously three syllable names.
It seemed less like a preparation for the military and more like a preparation for what happens when you get a degree in dance.
-
You were talking before about what kind of men you are. Is it wrong I am a pudenda man? I am a pudenda man.
Also, it should be fine to compliment whatever you want to compliment, but girls get freaked if you compliment a short skirt, tshirt with nothing clever on it, #####, shorts, bikini, or underwear. I am not sure why. I will do more research and report back to you promptly.
It is good to compliment hair/facial features.
-
But do not mention hair on facial features.
-
PANTALONES!!
-
You were talking before about what kind of men you are. Is it wrong I am a pudenda man? I am a pudenda man.
You can be a pancreas man if you like. To thine own self be true, dude.
-
You can be a pancreas man if you like. To thine own self be true, dude.
I wonder how you break it to your date that you're into her pancreas. Take her out for sweetbreads and hard liquor? Show off your high-end set of scalpels, retractors and suturing needles? Buy her cute crop-top / belly tees and play a lot of volleyball?
-
Tell her she has beautiful islets of langerhans.
-
I've been really digging a girl's cheeks lately.
-
Compliments can be creepy in the exact same way that gifts can be creepy. Thanks to human nature, 90% of the time someone giving one is expecting something in return. The closer the compliment comes to saying "you look like a good sex partner," the more likely the expected return is sex. Now you may be a generous and pure soul with no lust in your heart and mean nothing beyond simple appreciation and good will, but the recipient of your compliment has no way of knowing that.
Or rather, think to yourself "If I *was* trying to get into his/her #####, would this compliment be a good pick up line?" If so, it's potentially creepy.
-
Compliments can be creepy in the exact same way that gifts can be creepy. Thanks to human nature, 90% of the time someone giving one is expecting something in return. The closer the compliment comes to saying "you look like a good sex partner," the more likely the expected return is sex. Now you may be a generous and pure soul with no lust in your heart and mean nothing beyond simple appreciation and good will, but the recipient of your compliment has no way of knowing that.
Or rather, think to yourself "If I *was* trying to get into his/her ******, would this compliment be a good pick up line?" If so, it's potentially creepy.
This train of thought is why it is often hard for me to compliment or gift people.
Also, why when I am dating someone it is hard for me to do certain boyfriend-like activities. "if I do (blank), she will think I just want to have sex later."
Except sometimes I completely lose this knowledge and go way overboard in the opposite direction. "Happy birthday! I walked to the record store and bought you this present, I really hope you like it." *her roommates stare blankly in disbelief*
A-CAP, actually, was talking to me about this problem where I realized that... maybe intentions are not read in the way that I think.
I am often reluctant to create scenes like "hey, want to come back to my place and watch a movie?"
Because in my brain this is "Dan is trying to lure me to his house for makeouts."
When actually, if the situation is right, it is more like "oh, i would like to kiss dan, and he is creating a convenient way for me to say yes without being explicit. Yes, I would like to do this."
I think a lot of my girl problems are caused by the belief that girls do not want to kiss boys, and that the things boys do to lead to that situation are somehow... tricks.
-
Except sometimes I completely lose this knowledge and go way overboard in the opposite direction. "Happy birthday! I walked to the record store and bought you this present, I really hope you like it." *her roommates stare blankly in disbelief*
This seems like a perfectly reasonable and rational thing to do, unless the record store is guarded by shark-ninjas and the record you bought was "gonna get all up in yo' "
I think the thing is, they look like tricks, but they are obvious tricks. These constructs are completely obvious to both parties and exist just so everyone has plausible deniability.
-
Compliments can be creepy in the exact same way that gifts can be creepy. Thanks to human nature, 90% of the time someone giving one is expecting something in return. The closer the compliment comes to saying "you look like a good sex partner," the more likely the expected return is sex. Now you may be a generous and pure soul with no lust in your heart and mean nothing beyond simple appreciation and good will, but the recipient of your compliment has no way of knowing that.
Or rather, think to yourself "If I *was* trying to get into his/her ******, would this compliment be a good pick up line?" If so, it's potentially creepy.
Yeah, but what's wrong with just being honest. Why can't it be just "Hey, you look great and I'd like to have sex with you." Why is that creepy? It's honest and straightforward.
The problem is we've been co-opted into the females' pervasive need for romance and dissembling. Bah.
-
Doc-- yeah, I guess it was OK except it was weird that I was giving her a present at all, and then I was really obviously anxious about it.
The flip side is that a year later I think I am in pretty good shape in terms of that lady. I am just waiting to spring my trap.
-
Yeah, but what's wrong with just being honest. Why can't it be just "Hey, you look great and I'd like to have sex with you." Why is that creepy? It's honest and straightforward.
This is the world I wish I lived in when I was single.
-
I think a lot of my girl problems are caused by the belief that girls do not want to kiss boys, and that the things boys do to lead to that situation are somehow... tricks.
That will seem irrelevant when she's smoking your pole.
-
*I was trying to say, I have realized now that that is not how it actually works.
-
Dan, you need to say it in a way the people will understand. Thanks for making things clearer Paul.
-
The problem is we've been co-opted into the females' pervasive need for romance and dissembling. Bah.
Well, you know, this goes way back. We need to have some reassurance that you'll still be around later to drag home animal corpses for the children to eat. Romance shows that you're willing to make an effort.
-
In my experience, rolling over in the middle of the night, waking my spouse, and saying, "Wanna do it?" led to a mild argument over the importance of foreplay.
In other words, I think if you guys got what you say you want, you'd regret it.
-
In my experience, rolling over in the middle of the night, waking my spouse, and saying, "Wanna do it?" led to a mild argument over the importance of foreplay.
He didn't want foreplay, he just needed a fluffer.
-
I offered to fluff, I dunno what the problem was.
Maybe I should have taken off my sweat##### first.
-
Well, you know, this goes way back. We need to have some reassurance that you'll still be around later to drag home animal corpses for the children to eat. Romance shows that you're willing to make an effort.
So you're suggesting the ol' "club her on the head and drag her back to the cave by her ponytail method"?
-
Worked for me.
Oh, wait -- you mean the dude is supposed to do the clubbing?
-
Someone has to, might as well be me (http://achewood.com/index.php?date=02222007).
The necessary counterpoint. (http://achewood.com/index.php?date=11082007)
Kind of late, I know, but still necessary.