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Author Topic: My Dinner With Onstad  (Read 7332 times)

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pmcd9

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My evening with Chris Onstad
« Reply #15 on: August 18, 2003, 06:04:36 am »

If I had Chris Onstad as a guest in my house, the fare would be basic, because that's all I really know, but sometimes basic is best.  Rather than try to impress him with my extensive knowledge of cookery I would serve a simple meal which focuses on  freshness.

First I'd serve him a salad of romaine lettuce and homegrown beefsteak tomatos (if in season) and my special blue cheese dressing.  The main course would be thick cut charcoal grilled sirloin cooked medium rare and served with extra crispy homestyle (jacket on) french fries and grilled zuchini.  I'd ask my mother to bake some of her oh so tasty buscuits, and for the beverage I would serve iced tea.  For desert I would serve Houston's best carrot cake from Barnaby's and ice cold milk, followed by coffee.

After dinner Chris and I would retire to the listening room where we would sample some eclectic music while the widescreen showed some visually splendid movie on mute.  We may enhance the listening and relaxing experience with some fine herbal stimulant and whatever alcoholic beverage he's brought along.  We would discuss whatever was at hand as we are both talented conversationalist.  At some point, the new girlfriend I plan on having by then and Mrs. Onstad, who have been socializing in the kitchen, will rejoin us and perform a striptease together replete with playful touching of the breast and buttocks and culminating in a long slow kiss on the mouth.

The evening will draw to a close shortly thereafter with all parties feeling relaxed and satisfied.

20 years later we'll still be exchanging Christmas Cards.

~Paul
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Choop

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My Dinner With Onstad
« Reply #16 on: August 18, 2003, 06:23:18 am »

The real answer:

To whet the whistle, we would start with champagne cocktails or a fine scotch, served neat.

The opening course would be small crudites du pate and bacon-wrapped scallops, which would be followed (if wintry) by a pumpkin-squash soup and a fine, though inexpensive, french table wine, or (if summ'ry) a small bowl of mussels steeped in pinot grigio, garlic, butter, and italian herbs. The same pinot grigio used in the mussels would be served.

These will precede an insalata caprese, made with heirloom tomatos, bufala mozzarella, and oversized basil leaves, lightly drizzled in an earthy, spicy olive oil. A medium-bodied chardonnay will pair quite nicely.

The entree would be braised veal chops, accompanied by a garlic/red-potato mash, with a light mustard gravy. The ladies may stay with the chardonnay, or join the men in an Argentinian syrah.

For dessert, chocolate volcano cakes with small scoops of locally-made vanilla-brown-sugar ice cream atop them, and a port or snifter of Bailey's on the side.

Finally, Sumatran coffee, green tea, and Earl Grey will be provided to keep the guests awake until they arrive at their temporary rooming quarters.

Ain't nobody gonna be at my pad while I'm gettin' my bone on with the missus .
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side_show

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Re: My evening with Chris Onstad
« Reply #17 on: August 26, 2003, 01:40:42 am »

Quote from: "pmcd9"


At some point, the new girlfriend I plan on having by then and Mrs. Onstad, who have been socializing in the kitchen, will rejoin us and perform a striptease together replete with playful touching of the breast and buttocks and culminating in a long slow kiss on the mouth.

The evening will draw to a close shortly thereafter with all parties feeling relaxed and satisfied.

20 years later we'll still be exchanging Christmas Cards.

~Paul



disturbing and lovely
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doomglobe

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Re: My evening with Chris Onstad
« Reply #18 on: September 14, 2003, 06:18:05 am »

Quote from: "pmcd9"
 At some point, the new girlfriend I plan on having by then and Mrs. Onstad, who have been socializing in the kitchen, will rejoin us and perform a striptease together replete with playful touching of the breast and buttocks and culminating in a long slow kiss on the mouth.
~Paul


it is sexual fantasies like this that are included in the list of reasons I would have closed the messageboard had I been in onstad's position. thats just weird, paul.
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