The OFFICIAL Unofficial Achewood Message Board

Please login or register.

Login with username, password and session length
Advanced search  

News:

What is this, the fuckin' Algonquin Round Table or some shit? - Nabu

Pages: 1 2 [3] 4 5 ... 7   Go Down

Author Topic: Fourth Anniversary  (Read 15049 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

jough

  • God's Own Dick
  • Administrator
  • Philippe is standing on it.
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 948
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 6871
  • If you've got the time, we've got El Guapo.
    • View Profile
    • poetry archives
Fourth Anniversary
« Reply #30 on: October 18, 2005, 06:30:38 am »
You should see her ping-pong ball trick.  Now that's muscle control, baby.
Logged

Bobby Isosceles

  • Guest
Fourth Anniversary
« Reply #31 on: October 18, 2005, 01:09:18 pm »
Quote from: "jough"
You should see her ping-pong ball trick.  Now that's muscle control, baby.


She can stick an entire raw egg in, do a little pole dance, fart twice and when she ejects the egg, the shell is unbroken -- yet it is scrambled to perfection, with chives, inside.
Logged

jough

  • God's Own Dick
  • Administrator
  • Philippe is standing on it.
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 948
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 6871
  • If you've got the time, we've got El Guapo.
    • View Profile
    • poetry archives
Fourth Anniversary
« Reply #32 on: October 18, 2005, 02:56:49 pm »
Bozack's friend Gina can sit on a coil of rope, gyrate rhythmically for 20 seconds, and then pull out a perfect Angler's Loop without ever standing up.
Logged

Bobby Isosceles

  • Guest
Fourth Anniversary
« Reply #33 on: October 18, 2005, 03:00:21 pm »
Quote from: "jough"
Bozack's friend Gina can sit on a coil of rope, gyrate rhythmically for 20 seconds, and then pull out a perfect Angler's Loop without ever standing up.


Bozack's friend Gina can stick a pork chop between her legs, clap her ass cheeks together, and pull out three links of andouille sausage.
Logged

Turbo Ninja

  • A Tall Glass of Tuaca
  • Mr. Bear (Cornelius)
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 125
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 689
    • View Profile
Fourth Anniversary
« Reply #34 on: October 18, 2005, 06:06:34 pm »
Bozack's friend Gina can sit on an unshuffled deck of playing cards, use a Thighmaster for five seconds and deal a hand of Texas Hold'em to a table of eight players.

Just look out when it's time for her to turn the "river."
Logged

Beatrice

  • Todd
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 10
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 280
    • View Profile
Fourth Anniversary
« Reply #35 on: October 18, 2005, 06:43:35 pm »
That's fantastic!  Now she will NEVER come here AGAIN!




Also, sorry to be such a dissapointment, but when I get plastic surgery and my new achewood hoodie i will post pictures.  (...and deal a poker hand naked without using my hands.)
Logged

Bobby Isosceles

  • Guest
Fourth Anniversary
« Reply #36 on: October 18, 2005, 07:06:05 pm »
Quote from: "Beatrice"
That's fantastic!  Now she will NEVER come here AGAIN!


Well, shit, she came pretty much everywhere else!


... like the time she sat on a bottle of mouthwash, coughed twice and whitened her pu$$y dentata.
Logged

misterqueue

  • Sick Fuck
  • VIP
  • R I S O T T O ?
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 25
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 2011
  • I can do anything I want. And so can you.
    • View Profile
    • A Reason for Diseasin'
Fourth Anniversary
« Reply #37 on: October 18, 2005, 07:20:42 pm »
Any time someone on a damn forum I'm on brings up pu$$y dentata I'm reminded that we need yet another Godwin's law for it...

and then usually I'm distracte-  Oooh.. tinfoil.
Logged
So it's satire, is it?  Well that changes everything!

Lockjaw is serious times.

Bobby Isosceles

  • Guest
Fourth Anniversary
« Reply #38 on: October 18, 2005, 07:22:30 pm »
Quote from: "misterqueue"
Any time someone on a damn forum I'm on brings up pu$$y dentata I'm reminded that we need yet another Godwin's law for it...

and then usually I'm distracte-  Oooh.. tinfoil.


Via Wikipedia:

Quote from: "Wikipedia"

pu$$ys with actual teeth

In rare instances, teeth may actually be found in a pu$$y. Dermoid cysts are formed from the outer layers of embryonic skin cells. These cells are able to mature into teeth, bones, or hair, and these cysts are able to form anywhere the skin folds inwards to become another organ, such as in the ear or the pu$$y. The actual pu$$y is of course not able to bite.


I wonder if it can be trained to bite with enough Kegels -- Yeah, I see your point.
Logged

Null

  • Showbiz
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 3
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 204
    • View Profile
    • http://beckoningchasm.com
Fourth Anniversary
« Reply #39 on: October 18, 2005, 08:13:59 pm »
Gosh, if I was Gina--and I'm not saying I'm not--these exchanges would definitely cause the blood to drain from my basement full of victims.
Logged

misterqueue

  • Sick Fuck
  • VIP
  • R I S O T T O ?
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 25
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 2011
  • I can do anything I want. And so can you.
    • View Profile
    • A Reason for Diseasin'
Fourth Anniversary
« Reply #40 on: October 18, 2005, 08:16:04 pm »
Quote from: "Bobby Isosceles"

I wonder if it can be trained to bite with enough Kegels -- Yeah, I see your point.


Kegels always sounded like a Nazi anyway... Corporal Kegel.  

Anyway there you have it.. Godwin's Law invoked...  I feel better now.. mostly because I'm no longer laughing at images of labia chewing on beef jerky like Macho Man Randy Savage.
Logged
So it's satire, is it?  Well that changes everything!

Lockjaw is serious times.

arkabee

  • VIP
  • -=Ray=-
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 153
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 1280
  • i still hate the new forum software.
    • View Profile
Fourth Anniversary
« Reply #41 on: October 18, 2005, 08:21:35 pm »
while i'm not entirely sure if i want to show any inkling of support for a thread of talking about someone noone know's talents and abilites,
i simply can not resist invoking Mr Randy:

OOOOOHHHHHH YEEEAAAHHHHHH!
Logged
"God forbid I'd ever be separated from my Duran Duran for a single minute!"
-August West
"Maybe Hanson or the Jonas Brothers might finally lose their shit one day."
-Nabubrush

mudokon

  • Scrambles the Dog
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 2
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 5
    • View Profile
Fourth Anniversary
« Reply #42 on: October 18, 2005, 08:43:14 pm »
Man, I read those last few posts in complete horror, only to reach the end of the thread and remember that I was inadvertantly responsible for this topic. I'm going to go lie down for a while.
Logged

Bobby Isosceles

  • Guest
Fourth Anniversary
« Reply #43 on: October 18, 2005, 08:43:46 pm »
Quote from: "misterqueue"
Quote from: "Bobby Isosceles"

I wonder if it can be trained to bite with enough Kegels -- Yeah, I see your point.


Kegels always sounded like a Nazi anyway... Corporal Kegel.  

Anyway there you have it.. Godwin's Law invoked...  I feel better now.. mostly because I'm no longer laughing at images of labia chewing on beef jerky like Macho Man Randy Savage.


Intentional invocation of Godwin's Law means THE THREAD MUST GO ON.


Bozack's friend Gina sat on a stump, scratched her head and spit out a ream of paper!
Logged

CortJstr

  • Mod Squad
  • Philippe is standing on it
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 338
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 9820
  • Which gives us AN EXCUSE TO DRINK!
    • View Profile
Fourth Anniversary
« Reply #44 on: October 18, 2005, 08:55:00 pm »
Dang. Bozack's friend Gina has crazy muscle control. She must've done that whatchamacallit prana bindu training. Is she also a Truthsayer?
Logged
Pages: 1 2 [3] 4 5 ... 7   Go Up
« previous next »