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How Does He Smell?

Poll

Do you think of Onstad as a fat person?

Yes, with a paunch of at least Ray-esque proportions.
- 1 (9.1%)
No, the man who posts my comic is svelte as the dickens.
- 3 (27.3%)
This speculation is cruel and irrelevant to his genius.
- 7 (63.6%)

Total Members Voted: 10

Voting closed: October 23, 2005, 05:47:49 am


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Author Topic: Can anyone construct a concrete profile of this C. Onstad?  (Read 10704 times)

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jough

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Can anyone construct a concrete profile of this C. Onstad?
« Reply #45 on: October 24, 2005, 06:07:35 pm »

One of his Stanford buddies sent me a bunch of photos of Onstad last year, and suggested I post them here, but since Onstad doesn't seem to want to be known, I decided to not show them here (or send them privately to anyone who asks me via PM or email - yes, not even YOU).

However, I can verify that the photos that showed up on Dumbrella a few years ago ARE the one-and-only Achewood creator Chris Onstad.

I strongly suggest that no one google for them, though, as it's sometimes better not to know what kind of a dork your idols are.

wombat

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Can anyone construct a concrete profile of this C. Onstad?
« Reply #46 on: October 24, 2005, 06:18:48 pm »

If I ever want to embarass an old friend, remind me not to enlist Jough in the task.   You're no fun at all.
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Beatrice

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Can anyone construct a concrete profile of this C. Onstad?
« Reply #47 on: October 24, 2005, 06:19:09 pm »

Quote from: "jough"
Quote from: "AugustWest"
I think Chris Onstad has a c*ck that is 3 million miles long, but most of it is in the 18th dimension.

And Gina can take every inch of it.


With room to spare.


She knows what you've been saying.

Beatrice

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Can anyone construct a concrete profile of this C. Onstad?
« Reply #48 on: October 24, 2005, 06:22:09 pm »

Quote from: "jough"
One of his Stanford buddies sent me a bunch of photos of Onstad last year, and suggested I post them here, but since Onstad doesn't seem to want to be known, I decided to not show them here (or send them privately to anyone who asks me via PM or email - yes, not even YOU).



But I bet Gina could earn a peek at 'em, hey?

edit:  i could've combined these past two posts but i think this thread is dumb and didn't read all the way through.  Also, yeah, who the HELL is this Onstad dude?  That fuck*ng guy!

V-Adore

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Can anyone construct a concrete profile of this C. Onstad?
« Reply #49 on: October 24, 2005, 06:29:52 pm »

Quote from: "Beatrice"
Also, yeah, who the HELL is this Onstad dude?  That fuck*ng guy!

Apropos of nothing, I'm really glad I'm not the only one who uses "that fuck*ng guy" in conversation now. Yesterday was fairly archetypal:

ME: Yeah, I really miss (graduated dude). ... Then again, I don't think there's any of last year's seniors I don't miss. It's not like I think of any of them with "that fuck*ng guy! I'm glad he's gone."
FRIEND: What about (other graduated dude)? He was kind of a psychopath.
ME: ... you're right. That fuck*ng guy! I'm glad he's gone.
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ferocious j

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Can anyone construct a concrete profile of this C. Onstad?
« Reply #50 on: October 24, 2005, 07:45:49 pm »

Quote from: "CortJstr"
Wasn't he at the Dumbrella booth at an SPX-esque event early in the strip's life? I'm sure one of the Dumbrellites saw him.

He was at APE maybe three years ago.  I met him.  He's not a fat dude.
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ndpatel

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Can anyone construct a concrete profile of this C. Onstad?
« Reply #51 on: October 24, 2005, 08:15:24 pm »

Quote from: "AugustWest"
Seriously, can anybody name a decent work of art or literature that was produced by a group of more than say 3 creators?  It's not happening.


cathedrals
the bible*
castles
ipods
the new mustang
any classically animated disney movie
london calling
curb your enthusiasm

the world is full of creativity, you know?

*and any other traditional religious text, really.
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AugustWest

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Can anyone construct a concrete profile of this C. Onstad?
« Reply #52 on: October 24, 2005, 08:45:55 pm »

Quote from: "ndpatel"
Quote from: "AugustWest"
Seriously, can anybody name a decent work of art or literature that was produced by a group of more than say 3 creators?  It's not happening.


cathedrals
the bible*
castles
ipods
the new mustang
any classically animated disney movie
london calling
curb your enthusiasm

the world is full of creativity, you know?

*and any other traditional religious text, really.


I guess I would draw a distinction between working on a piece of art and being the designer/main creative force behind it.  A cathedral has an architect.  Each book in the bible was written by one person.  Movies and television shows have single writers and single directors.  I'm not suggesting that people can't work collaboratively, but that it works best when they are responsible for well-defined areas of the production.

I suppose that sitcoms and blockbuster movies are often written by committee, but that tends to support my point, doesn't it?
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aparrish

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Can anyone construct a concrete profile of this C. Onstad?
« Reply #53 on: October 24, 2005, 08:48:06 pm »

Quote from: "ndpatel"
Quote from: "AugustWest"
Seriously, can anybody name a decent work of art or literature that was produced by a group of more than say 3 creators?  It's not happening.


cathedrals
the bible*
castles
ipods
the new mustang
any classically animated disney movie
london calling
curb your enthusiasm

the world is full of creativity, you know?

*and any other traditional religious text, really.


Well played!  To be fair, though, it would be more difficult to glibly assemble such a list if you limited "literature or art" to mean, say, novels and Art art (like you'd find in the MoMA or the Met).

Then again, even novels attributed to one author are the product of many people, from editors to typesetters to whatever else.  I don't seem to really be advancing a thesis here.
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Formica

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Can anyone construct a concrete profile of this C. Onstad?
« Reply #54 on: October 24, 2005, 09:57:42 pm »

Quote from: "ferocious j"

He was at APE maybe three years ago.  I met him.  He's not a fat dude.

I believe the term is dude of gravity

Also, from the HOT NUDE PIXXX that show up from time to time, I always thought 'stad looked... well, utterly unmemorable, just a random, average guy.
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Bozack

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Can anyone construct a concrete profile of this C. Onstad?
« Reply #55 on: October 24, 2005, 10:31:13 pm »

jesus christ.
I work hard, all day long, and I come back to the board to this?
Anyway, there were a bunch of hilarious jokes I was going to make about posts people made 3 pages ago, but I forgot them.
I would be down with meeting Onstad. I met William Gibson, if listening to him read, asking him a question, shaking hands with him, smiling at him and talking about Slink with him can be considered "meeting" him, and it actually enhanced my amazement about the man- not only can he come up with really interesting ideas and theories, and work them into great stories, he can do this sort of thing completely off-hand.
That being said, if the person doing the work is actually a total jackass, I think that might diminish the work a lot. Even though I know of Onstad through the INTERNET, which adds creepiness to everything, I think he seems like a pretty cool, normal guy. I could have a few Raniers, but I'm not gonna buy a plane ticket.
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Kai

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Can anyone construct a concrete profile of this C. Onstad?
« Reply #56 on: October 24, 2005, 11:19:24 pm »

Kids in the Hall!  

Listen to their commentary or read an article about them (to care enough to do which now apparently you have to be a mouth-breathing cretin,) and you will discover that they not only worked as a six man, democratic committee, but turned out fuck*ng awesome work, better even than a cathedral full of typesetters printing Korans.

Also I'm a Canadian ("Ah HA!  Pompous bitch!")  and aside from having to hold it down for KITH I live with proof that all sorts of things apart from Art and Literature work better when you've got lots of people in on 'em.  Like health care.  But comics?  What a fascinating proposition! Everyone on this massage board (except the indignant dude of gravity who can't seem to spell, and will likely post a retaliation centred on the word 'massage',) has so far exhibited a concentration of wit far above what you'd expect from a couple dozen randomly selected people.  The Concrete/Concrete joke?  Priceless!  The ability to remember obscure things like Ranier Beer and 'Shaddup You'? That shows real dedication to the medium!  

Why not channel some of the free hours spent bickering into putting together an experimental little comic?  It's not like you need to be a fine arts grad, look at Onstad!  (Mind you it's probably his gelatinous, ogre-like mitts that impede his drawing.)

What I'm saying is there could be say three stock characters to begin with, and people could either try narrative-style sequences or random gags, all open to constructive criticism from other 'board' members, with the only rule that no-one but the author could edit or withdraw a comic.  And maybe that everything's submitted in some standardized file format.  And whoever puts it together gets referred to as "his eminence, the grand vizier."

Of course I am a computer retard and have no idea how to get something like that up and running.  But surely someone's got some ideas.

P.S.  How many thirteen-year olds use this site, couldn't we just spell "fuck*ng" properly?  It's not like they don't know what the word is that's supposed to be there.  Spelling it "fuck*ng" is like saying ess-ee-ex in front of kids like they're dogs.
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AugustWest

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« Reply #57 on: October 24, 2005, 11:29:23 pm »

Quote from: "Kai"

P.S.  How many thirteen-year olds use this site, couldn't we just spell "fuck*ng" properly?  It's not like they don't know what the word is that's supposed to be there.  Spelling it "fuck*ng" is like saying ess-ee-ex in front of kids like they're dogs.


Suddenly I feel a breeze.
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Doc

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Can anyone construct a concrete profile of this C. Onstad?
« Reply #58 on: October 25, 2005, 12:04:34 am »

Just to comment on the actual topic: while I'm normally all for meeting creators of stuff (thought not always) in Onstad's case I would draw the line, mainly because he has inserted a fictional version of himself into the strip so meeting the actual him would just spoil it.
You guys have got me going through my head now trying to figure out which creative people I would want to meet: Pratchett yeah, Gaiman maybe, Ellison probably not (first three that came to mind, feel free to point out how pathetically stereotypical this makes me).
Webcomics are harder though because so often (though not so much with achewood) the creator itself is a very visible part of the whole show that destroying your image of one could totally ruin the other.
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Ben-San

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Can anyone construct a concrete profile of this C. Onstad?
« Reply #59 on: October 25, 2005, 12:07:20 am »

Quote from: "Doc"
You guys have got me going through my head now trying to figure out which creative people I would want to meet: Pratchett yeah, Gaiman maybe, Ellison probably not (first three that came to mind, feel free to point out how pathetically stereotypical this makes me).


Having met all three at conventions and such (only in passing, but at least not just at the obligatory signing thing) I have to say good call on all three decisions.
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