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Author Topic: The Poe Toaster  (Read 3718 times)

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Beatrice

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The Poe Toaster
« on: December 07, 2005, 06:29:09 pm »

Interesting...

First I've heard!

wombat

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The Poe Toaster
« Reply #1 on: December 07, 2005, 06:49:46 pm »

This is a nice Baltimore mystery that involves the Poe toaster.
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If you're going to change your life then you have to change it every day, not just the days the world isn't taking a shit on you. -Doc

aparrish

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The Poe Toaster
« Reply #2 on: December 07, 2005, 06:52:01 pm »

The Wikipedia neglects to mention the note that the Toaster left on the grave in 1986:

The angels, not half so happy in heaven,
Went envying her and me -
Yes! - that was the reason (as all men know,
In this kingdom by the sea)
That the wind came out of the cloud by night,
Chilling and killing my Original Coke.

Seriously, though, "The Baltimore Ravens. A thousand injuries they will suffer"?  I had no idea the Poe Toaster had so thoroughly jumped the shark.
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wombat

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The Poe Toaster
« Reply #3 on: December 07, 2005, 08:32:48 pm »

Have I mentioned lately that Poe and I have the same birthday?
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What is this, the fuckin' Algonquin Round Table or some shit?  - Nabu

If you're going to change your life then you have to change it every day, not just the days the world isn't taking a shit on you. -Doc

V-Adore

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The Poe Toaster
« Reply #4 on: December 07, 2005, 09:17:22 pm »

Quote from: "wombat"
Have I mentioned lately that Poe and I have the same birthday?

I smell conspiracy theory.
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Doc

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The Poe Toaster
« Reply #5 on: December 07, 2005, 11:13:31 pm »

Ech so this new kid is into supporting football teams (is it football?) and political messages.
See how sports and politics destroy everything good and cool?!
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Golfhaus

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The Poe Toaster
« Reply #6 on: December 08, 2005, 12:41:41 am »

One of my two favorite professors in college was a Doctor Of Edgar Allan Poe. Poe had been the subject of his doctoral thesis. Poe had been the subject of most of his scholarly work (but not his most famous). His license plates said "POE DOC." He used to joke with his classes about the "published reports of the Toaster's big nose" and then turn himself in profile to the class so we could take his large schnozz in yet again.

There was always the thought. Dr. Millar was diagnosed with cancer in late 1998 and died, I believe, in late 1999 or 2000. Whatever his personal involvement, I'm sure he would not approve of whoever is doing the toasting treating the ritual with that kind of disgrace.
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Bozack

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The Poe Toaster
« Reply #7 on: December 08, 2005, 03:12:57 am »

I say that next year, I go and pre-empt the sucky Toaster.
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Doc

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« Reply #8 on: December 08, 2005, 04:32:58 am »

I say tell him you've got a special bottle of Cognac you want him to use in your basement then lure him down and brick him up.
If he doesn't see it coming he's hardly worthy anyway.
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jough

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The Poe Toaster
« Reply #9 on: December 08, 2005, 07:18:26 am »

I had a Poe toaster once.  It made my Poes all nice and toasty.

Bozack

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The Poe Toaster
« Reply #10 on: December 08, 2005, 08:59:31 am »

Quote from: "jough"
I had a Poe toaster once.  It made my Poes all nice and toasty.


When I first saw the thread title, I kind of hoped that someone had made a toasted that browns a piece by Poe into the side of your bread, like those Mickey penis ones.

"Poor, lost Lenor-" CRUNCH!
CHEW CHEW CHEW CHEW.
GULP.
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Golfhaus

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The Poe Toaster
« Reply #11 on: December 08, 2005, 12:39:03 pm »

They could make a whole series... a Mark Twain waffle maker, a Hunter S. Thompson juicer, a Kurt Vonnegut knife set...
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wombat

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« Reply #12 on: December 08, 2005, 12:59:10 pm »

Oh man, now I want a Poe Toaster so bad.  With Poe on one side and a raven on the other.  Dang.
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What is this, the fuckin' Algonquin Round Table or some shit?  - Nabu

If you're going to change your life then you have to change it every day, not just the days the world isn't taking a shit on you. -Doc

CortJstr

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The Poe Toaster
« Reply #13 on: December 08, 2005, 02:54:39 pm »

At UVa they have Poe's room "preserved" with a little recording and a plexiglass door that you can look through.

I used quotation marks because apparently he was so poor that instead of buying firewood for his room he just burned the university-supplied furniture. So the stuff in there now he never even laid eyes on.

No toasters, though.
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pmcd9

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The Poe Toaster
« Reply #14 on: December 09, 2005, 06:00:28 am »

When I saw the thread title, I thought it was a demented or haunted toaster that somehow did something strange akin to what might be read in a Poe story.  Some dude visiting Poe's grave on his birthday and offering a toast and flowers.  Doing it for over fifty years, becoming renowned for it, and taking his secret to the grave is pretty fuck*ng cool too though.  His successor using the platform to talk about a fuck*ng football team is just lame.

~Paul
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