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[robot_god]

BOOYAH.

Gotta get it taken out, bay-bee.

Gotta get the "challenging surgery," bay-bee.

Howya like me now, gold teeth crak da smile.

[Doc]

I'm guessing they just broke out the Good Drugs.

I've just had three teeth come through which I thought were wisdom teeth (I've always been great about going to the dentist except for this last year so I haven't had a chance to find out for realz) but they seem to be fitting in fine and have caused me no pain so after all these stories I'm not so sure. I'm hoping this is because when I had braces I had four teeth removed and that made room for them. Still have all four in a drawer in my room with old cds and stuff too. Not much pain (I hit the drugs hard for a week or two and hit my folks up for hell of yoghurt and other soft treats) from that but it's damn weird to have your dentist with his knee on your chest to pull that fucker out. Today's fun fact about me: I now only have one eyetooth. I like to think this makes my smile look interestingly lopsided but in reality my first molar on the other side is kind of pointy and who the hell is looking at my teeth anyway.

[Nabubrush]

I'm looking at those glasses, myself.

[Mantonio]

Thus far, my first four wisdom teeth have not caused me any problems. However, the last time I went to a dentist I was shocked to learn that I have two more waiting to come in on my upper jaw. If they ever do pierce gum, out they'll be yanked & under the influence of drugs I shall be.

I am a mutant.

[misterqueue]

STORY TIME:

Earlier this year it was determined I needed one of the wisdom teeth that had come through needed to come out.  I only grew 2 wisdom teeth (for whatever reason my upper ones just decided not to ever grow; maybe I'm not all that wise?)  There was more than enough room (I have a big mouth, just ask my ex-girlfriends  BOOYAKKA!) so the dentist didn't worry about them when they came in.

The one on the right side though was being a pest it needed to be removed.  I happily obliged my oral thaumaturge and sought out the Chiron of oral surgery.  They wouldn't have to cut and I'd only need a local, which is fine by me.  I hate being put under, but mostly because if I'm going to be randomly fondled below the belt, I'd rather be awake for it.  He gave me a shot, then another, and then another.  He then put down what felt the hell like a lead vest over me.  It was really just like plastic sheeting, but I thought "The hell does he need this for?"  I came here for a bib like a regular patient and dammit that's what I wanted.

I figured he knew better than I though, so I grilled and chilled while the numbness set in.  Eventually Dr. Doom came back in the room and prodded about asking if I could feel anything.  I gave him the big ol' negatory and he set about himself with tools.  I think I may have swallowed hard, but it's not easy to do with your mouth open.

In front of him lay what might have been a sculptor's chisel that was forged in the fires of Abaddon.  Seriously, it looked like a hunk of steel that would drive 50's era Pittsburgh into fits of jealousy.  My mouth splayed open as he leaned in and began knocking at the tooth a bit.  Apparently this was, I can only assume, to find a weak point, because after about 30 seconds he grabbed what one might describe as tongs with bullets on the end and placed it alongside the tooth.

The next thing I experienced was a sound not unlike a thick branch snapping in winter from the weight of ice.  This was my tooth cracking down the line.  I felt nothing but a tugging all the way down in my jaw as he gripped each side and pulled the foul calcite invader from my jaw itself.  It's a weird thing to suddenly have knowledge of just how far ones teeth extend beyond looking at an x-ray.  Did I mention the splatter of blood when he broke the tooth?  It didn't so much splatter as it sprayed us both.  Now I understood the tarp he'd covered me in.

After about 5 more minutes of digging out tooth pieces he handed me a bottle of vicodin and sent me on my way.

"you're the calmest person I've ever had in here," he said.  Good to know I'll do well under torture then, as long as the torturers use a local anesthetic.

[Hobot]

STORY TIME: CONT'D

I had gum surgery in Middle School (as I've mentioned) because the gum line below my bottom front teeth was receding, which is apparently a bad thing. 

They didn't put me under, which would have been really nice, because I am ten kinds of terrified of needles.  This is especially unfortunate considering all the dental work I've had done.  Anyway, I had no fewer than eight shots of Novocaine in the most sensitive parts (are there any other parts?) of my mouth.  My surgeon instructed me to get his attention whenever I felt the Novocaine wearing off. 

Everything was going smoothly through the slicing and grafting parts of the surgery.  However, when it came time to sew the new bit of gum below my teeth, I could feel the scratchy thread being dragged through my gums.  It didn't hurt, per se, but the sensation of twine-like thread being pulled through one's gums is more than a little unnerving.  I dumbly grunted and thrashed in the direction of the doctor to indicate I needed more Novocaine.  This, my friends, was one of the most difficult decisions of my life: to go through the creepy and possibly painful sensation of oral cross-stitch, or to experience the undoubtedly agonizing pain of more Novocaine injections?  I chose the latter (but I'm not sure whether or not it has made all the difference).

PART THE SECOND:

To illustrate just how terrified I am of needles, I will disclose certain facts about my wisdom teeth removal.  When I visited the dentist for my pre-surgical consultation, he informed me that I would be hooked up to an IV.  He touched the inside of my arm on the large vein by the elbow joint, and I began to shake uncontrollably.  Noticing my panic, he remarked, "I think I'll write you a prescription to take beforehand."

Yes, he gave me a muscle relaxant.

[theinevitable]

one of my good friends was mortally terrified of needles.
she did not know this, somehow.
then, one day, she went into the doctor's office to get a shot.
the doctor pulled out a needle.
she passed out on the floor.

I guess, if you're afraid of needles, you can't get one of those trendy heroin addictions.

[Carlos del Vaca]

I had very similar gum surgery, Hobot.  It was highly unpleasant.

I have all my wisdom teeth, and I plan on keeping them.  A year or two ago my dentist was like, "You should have your wisdom teeth removed because it's difficult for me to reach them for cleaning."  I should go through that because it's incovenient for YOU?  Whatever.

I do, however, have a crown.  That was kind of sucky.

[V-Adore]

I have all my wisdom teeth, and I plan on keeping them.  A year or two ago my dentist was like, "You should have your wisdom teeth removed because it's difficult for me to reach them for cleaning."  I should go through that because it's incovenient for YOU?  Whatever.

To play dentist's advocate, I presume that the implied rider there was "... and if they can't stay adequately cleaned, you're risking serious tooth decay and things worse than just having them out now."

Also: this thread is giving me dentist phobia. Eeeek.

[Nabubrush]

The one of mine that had to be broken ended up broken in about 7 pieces.

[wombat]

This thread doesn't have enough pictures.

[pmcd9]

This thread doesn't have enough pictures.

Oh I'm sorry.



Rootcanal'd

~Paul

[robot_god]

The lid of that can seems to portray the love-child of Raphael and Bebop.

That is a good can.

[wombat]

That's better.

[V-Adore]

Paul, do you have some kind of tiny gnome wandering after you taking photos? This is getting downright surreal.