Today on my exam paper they had a question:
An article in the newspaper has stated that schools are useless in a world of Information Technology. Write a letter to the editor expressing YOUR OWN OPINION on the matter.
My thoughts: "Well, my own opinion on such a thing is complex! That's no fun. What I've got to do here is act like a righteous dick, and have as controversial an opinion on the whole thing as possible. Then it will be fun. I've got to be a dick. I've got to act like Pat."
Starting with a condescending tone of voice directed at the (imagined) other Letters To The Editor, I leaped into the Pattish prose with gusto. Unfortunately I don't have it to show you, but I can recite some passages (note that I wasn't acting exactly like Pat; I interchanged between liberal and conservative views for full bile.):
"I'm sick of the Government and their meek, fusty view on sex education in schools. With teen pregnancies rising, the OBVIOUS answer is to let them free on a computer, where they can find many sites detailing frankly the act of sexual intercourse. I know some of you self-righteous, oh-so-precious parents may object. And you would be wrong."
"Some of you idealistic parents out there may believe school benefits social interactions. You are WRONG. Relationships of any kind at school are disruptive and distracting; instead, if all students were home schooled using I.T., pre-arranged dates with parents present can be set aside for 'interaction'. Then the children would feel satisfied that they were not only working hard, but keeping unnecessary interaction to a minimum."
If this is not interesting to you: it was better when I wrote it, I swear. Oh, and I managed to sneak in references to Pink Floyd, playing the banjo and being a veglegon.
Okay, you can go now.
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Topic: Acting Like Pat (Read 2692 times)