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[V-Adore]

If you haven't chosen classes yet, it's vital that you keep each day as similar as possible.  Try not to have more than a one hour difference in start times through the week.  The only classes I was consistently late to were the ones that started three hours or more before the classes on alternate days did.

This advice is the goddamn gospel truth. It will seem like a real thrill if you manage to schedule yourself very light or nonexistent class loads on days within the week -- "awesome! No getting up before lunch on Tuesdays and Thursdays!" -- but it will fuck up your circadian rhythms something awful and make the days on which you do have early classes suck much worse.

In general, don't be afraid of 9 AM courses or modifying your schedule to fit them. Really, you'll live. Just remember to sleep; even an hour or two more a night will make a difference.

[wombat]

Just remember to sleep; even an hour or two more a night will make a difference.

YES.  If there was one thing I wished I could have convinced my students of, it was this.

[V-Adore]

YES.  If there was one thing I wished I could have convinced my students of, it was this.

The worst part about this is that, even if you know intellectually that more sleep is good, there will always be some fucker you know in college who doesn't need it. Thanks to a resilient circadian cycle or immense fortitude or some blessing of the gods, he'll never appear to be getting more than four hours a night (if that), and yet he'll still pull all-nighters all the time and do everything with flying colors. He inevitably makes it look easy. The only thing to keep in mind here: it is not easy. Most people are not that guy. You could not do what that guy does, no matter what you think, and for the love of God do not exhaust yourself trying. Get the sleep you need.

Also, be careful about what you eat. Everyone has disdain for dining halls, but they will provide you with a rhythm for your day -- lunch at X time, dinner at Y -- that makes life a lot easier. Don't eat random crap, and don't eat random crap at random times. This is where the "freshman fifteen" comes from. (Well, that and beer.)

[jough]

I only slept 3-4 hours a night in college - I was one of those fuckers that everyone else hated because I seemed to never sleep.

Actually, I had continued my hardly ever sleeping thing up until recently.

[Choop]

I tended to sleep between 3 and 5 hours a night during the week and catch up on the weekends, sleeping until 3 or 5 p.m.

Do you have a tape/digital recorder? The two best study guides, better than textbooks even, I ever had were my recordings of class lectures. (Listen to them after class and type notes, then amalgamate w/ notes you took in class. You will miss things, and this catches you up.) and the resultant notebooks. (To study, retype your notes into a new document and organize as you go, looking up what you don't understand. Trust me, it works.) If you want to graduate, study. If you don't give a fuck, don't bother going to college.

Also: don't use your credit card unless you want The Bad Men to come and take away your future. I know this sounds like a Mom&Dad^TM threat, but I used my credit card and I'm still catching up to the mistakes I made.

Finally, you'll want a lockable box- not like a fire safe, necessarily, but something to keep various private items away from an unwanted audience. (Cash, medicine, porn/toys, etc. Don't look at me like that, you know it's true.)

PS: Avoid LSD at all costs. At least if you have anything at all to do the next day.

[AugustWest]

PS: Avoid LSD at all costs. At least if you have anything at all to do the next day.

In fact, why don't you send all the LSD you run across to me.  It'll effectively remove the temptation.

Another suggestion if you haven't registered yet.

Don't kill yourself the first semester.  Ease into the college classwork.  I was overly arrogant as a freshman and took an extremely difficult schedule my first semester.  It bit me in the ass, hard.  It's not a reflection on your academic abilities, it's just wise and/or shrewd.  You're making a huge life adjustment to a new social and academic atmosphere.  There's plenty of time to take everything you'll need.  You will be far better served by taking an easier schedule and getting your feet under you than by trying to prove your scholastic studliness your first semester.

Good luck.  Maybe you'll get one of my old dorm rooms.

[Choop]

Forgot to mention: never put ice in a glass bong.

[theinevitable]

Augy-- I am in a new(er) dorm, meaning it was built some time in the late 90's. My roommate is kind of a dork, but oh well. He seems nice enough. Everyone else, yes. I have taken note of your notes. I leave in 10 days.... yeesh. I signed up for a "freshman program" which means like half of my classes are chosen for me... but I will use at least 1 or 2 of the other openings to take things which are fun (for me, at least) like Linguistics or Latin or music.

my "first year program" is Memory in Mind and Culture

I looked up the program, and apparently all it really means is that I take 2 psych classes this year, and 1 next year. It'll be cool.

and yes, I am terrified of credit cards. I have a small amount of cash from my parents each month, and about 500$ in the bank that I've saved up. I have the exact amount written down on a small ledger-type pad which fits in my wallet. Luckily I get a free metro card, and can't bring a car, so transportation costs aren't an issue. The dining hall food seems acceptable... at least, much better than the food at my high school was.

also, at this point I have realized that I need huge amounts of sleep to function. Blegh.

[Limmo]

Forgot to mention: never put ice in a glass bong.

Avoid glass bongs in general.  The plastic ones are just as good.  Or poke around the internet and learn how to make a gravity bong. 

[linnea]

and yes, I am terrified of credit cards. I have a small amount of cash from my parents each month, and about 500$ in the bank that I've saved up. I have the exact amount written down on a small ledger-type pad which fits in my wallet. Luckily I get a free metro card, and can't bring a car, so transportation costs aren't an issue. The dining hall food seems acceptable... at least, much better than the food at my high school was.

also, at this point I have realized that I need huge amounts of sleep to function. Blegh.

I managed to get sleep in college and enough buck-wild time to write more than a few pulp novels. ALSO... avoid credit cards like the devil. I ran up so much debt on mine that I had to declare bankruptcy, and now NOBODY will give me the time of day, let alone a credit card that allows me to rack up free Alaska Airlines miles. Sad.

The credit card debacle was made that much worse because I have basically no impulse control, and a very limited ability to even imagine "delayed gratification." I am shocked that they continued to extend credit to me as I snowballed into Debtor's Hell. Do yourself a favor, learn how to stick to a budget. You'll thank me when you're my age and wanting to buy a house. I want to buy a house, but nobody will  lend me a thin dime for the mortgage.

[Choop]

Or poke around the internet and learn how to make a gravity bong.

Quick instructions: Trash can, fill with water. 2-liter bottle, cut off the bottom. Socks, wear some you don't care about. Cut middle of bottle lid out (x-acto blade?), replace with screen or foil w/ holes poked through. Sink all but lid of bottle into water. Load w/ tobacco, light afire. Raise slowly to keep alight and fill bottle w/ smoke. Unscrew lid, replace w/ mouth, and inhale while re-sinking bottle. Have someone else reload while you hold onto your socks, because if you don't they'll be blown right the fuck *ff.

[Choop]

Re: credit card. Try 18.5% on a USED CAR LOAN. Thank $deity that car's almost paid off. I'm almost 30, and still over 6 months from buying a house. I should own where I live by now, damnit!

[AugustWest]

Quick instructions: Trash can, fill with water. 2-liter bottle, cut off the bottom. Socks, wear some you don't care about. Cut middle of bottle lid out (x-acto blade?), replace with screen or foil w/ holes poked through. Sink all but lid of bottle into water. Load w/ tobacco, light afire. Raise slowly to keep alight and fill bottle w/ smoke. Unscrew lid, replace w/ mouth, and inhale while re-sinking bottle. Have someone else reload while you hold onto your socks, because if you don't they'll be blown right the fuck *ff.

Variations, some of which might make the process easier.

Instead of a trash can, a deep sink (i.e. a kitchen sink) works just fine.  We always used a gallon milk jug -- more volume.  A screen or foil placed directly onto a plastic lid = toxic meltage.  A better choice is the bowl + stem from a bong.

The Gravity Inversion Bong brings to mind another phenomenon.  I think it was called scuba diving???  Basically it involved inhaling a hit, holding one's nose then exhaling as if to pop one's eardrums, thus blowing the smoke into the eustachian canals.  Said canals are assumably full of mucous membranes and tiny little capillaries, thus providing vast new surfaces for absorbtion of intoxicating substances.

Heh.

[Choop]

Sounds fun

I did say "Quick instructions" - foil, given a couple layers, will usually last long enough for 4-5 hits before melting the plastic around it.

Man, I *love* a nice vanilla tobacco in my gravity bong.

[KeithHernandez]

Yea, my freshman year I really screwed up.  I would get stoned and play two square (like 4 square but with your feet) until like 6 am.  Then I would wake up (sometimes) for class at 9:30.  I got a 2.9 my first semester, and a 2.2 my second.  I also took a ridiculous amount of classes.  I haven't really changed anything since then, except I ALWAYS go to class, and I pay great attention.  Also, your first year is always the one where you take more widely varied classes.  These suck, and lots of them are in the morning with no attendence policy.  Make sure you go to these.  These are also the classes with really lame multiple choice tests, these suck.  Since I got into my major, I always become friends with my professors, do great work, and do as many outside of class "activities" as always.  I cannot emphasize enough becoming friends with your professors and going to office hours like early in the semester just to talk (if he/she is cool at all).  Most of my professors have been former stoners that always are like making jokes about it and what not.  For instance, one time I was up in my instructors office where he was going to give me and a few other people a paper of some sort.  When he couldn't find it, he said, "In my old life back in California, I would have asked whose holding".  After finding the papers in his bag, he made some joke about dealing that I have since forgotten.  I have taken three classes with this guy, and always get A's because he enjoys my writing and knows I always do the reading.  That is all most professors ask for, just to see you are trying and can procss information.  Then again, I am a history major, so I am sure not all are like this.  I have made near 4 points each semester since getting into my major.  Just remember, it gets easier as you go.

Bongs:

First on all, if you make a gravity bong using a glass bowl from a real bong, a trick is to stick a straw in the bottom of the stem.  This way, you can get a gravity bong that actually cools the smoke, and wicked cool bubbles filled with smoke that come up to the surface.  A bucket is much preferred in these areas for the base.  Glass bongs are indeed overrated, and I generally view them as excessive and just something to show off with.  That said, I owned one until the DEA showed up at my house.  Bubblers and chilums, on the other hand, are a mans best friend. 

Remember, while a hit of kief in the morning makes a man as strong as a 1,000 elephants, many hits make a man lazy, but do not take away his ability to learn.  The hardest part about college is not the work, but making yourself do the work.  Just do it, and it will be almost as easy as high school, especially once you get into your major and actually care about your classes.

Also, my freshman year, we used to smoke in the bullpen of the baseball field.  I know you don't smoke, you may take it up (it's college man), but if you don't you should look for cool places like this that you can just hang in at night with your friends.  Every campus/college town has lesser known spots that are fuck*ng awesome to get away from the craziness.  Oh, you are going somewhere in St. Louis I remember, never mind that college town bit, but your school will still have some awesome places to chill that aren't like the student union or some lame coffee shop.

One time I took mushrooms the night before a 8:30 class and it sucked.  As previously mentioned, keep the psychedelics for the weekends.



Oh yeah, jackets.  It gets well below 20 F here, but only for about a month worth of days throughout the year.  The wind is the real thing you need to look out for.  Personally, I can go to the top of a Mountain in Boulder CO at night during Christmas break wearing:

Long john full body suit (seriously this is really all you need), leg coverings fit for public sight (some call them ******), a long undershirt that goes ontop of the long johns, and a hoody/ button down long sleeve and light soccer warm up jacket that is insulated awesome. 

I am all about layers.  Get some type of cheap moderate weight jacket made out of rain proof material for rain.  Or just buy the bad ass Wayne Coyne jacket.