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@achewood "One of Your Shoes is By the Dog Food: A Tale of Things Not Worth Mentioning During Married Life," is out in September on Harper-Doubleday.

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Author Topic: October 6, 2006 - A phone is like a woman who hates you. It's all she does.  (Read 5420 times)

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littlefallsmets

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Re: October 6, 2006 - A phone is like a woman who hates you. It's all she does.
« Reply #15 on: October 06, 2006, 07:34:13 pm »
Quote from: JorgeFabregas on October 06, 2006, 07:15:54 pm
"Naw man.  I'm pretty fuck*ng far from okay!"

Well, here's the thing, though.

That sequence ended with Bruce Willis getting a day to get skip town because of how screwed up that all was.

When Lex and Supes finally touch back down on Earth, no matter how long and hard they had to fight back-to-back to prevent the horror of simian anal penetration... Lex is gonna scramble to get the right meteorite into his anti-Superman gun and then Superman is gonna shrink Lex down with a gas pellet Batman invented and put him in a bottle marked "Jail".

Butters still sits down to watch Pixie and Dixie battle Mr. Jinx the Cat and puts Hunts on his potato chips.

No matter how much Ray would want to forgive him because of their battle with Soft Focus Man, he can't.

He's a crap dude posing as a player and he's gonna have to get Beef to rig a Roomba with a tape recorder to prove it.

That's just who Ray is... the kinda dude who thanks Batman by writing a glowing newspiece on Wayne Enterprises and flies off to deposit the jail-bottle up in the arctic, right between the giant key and the cyborg polar bear discotheque.
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colmore

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Re: October 6, 2006 - A phone is like a woman who hates you. It's all she does.
« Reply #16 on: October 06, 2006, 09:43:49 pm »
The little old-timey glowing man glows as if he were projected onto a silver screen.  This has something to do with the debate over the superiority of Disney's more artful, but less funny, cartoons vs. more modern, televised fare.  Also telephones, ominous dogs, highly mobile puddles of blood, and the fact that somewhere in Ray's contract, it says he has to confront the terrifyingly surreal edges of experience about twice a year.

Coming in 2007: Some cool Stellas with Cthulhu, and a crazy impromptu trip in the haunted car of Hunter Thompson.
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vivouk

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Re: October 6, 2006 - A phone is like a woman who hates you. It's all she does.
« Reply #17 on: October 07, 2006, 01:40:37 pm »
Quote from: colmore on October 06, 2006, 09:43:49 pm
Coming in 2007: Some cool Stellas with Cthulhu, and a crazy impromptu trip in the haunted car of Hunter Thompson.

 ;D
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Bobby Isosceles

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Re: October 6, 2006 - A phone is like a woman who hates you. It's all she does.
« Reply #18 on: October 08, 2006, 05:22:23 pm »
Quote from: littlefallsmets on October 06, 2006, 07:07:38 pm
I've always been a big fan of the "two dudes who really don't like each other and WON'T learn to be buddies no matter what they go through together... but here they are... unified by their common plane of reality in the face of something so weird or terrible and they're all the other one has until the crisis passes or they die" narrative.

I don't know if there's a shorter name for that narrative.


"Two men trapped in a tight place"
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AugustWest

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Re: October 6, 2006 - A phone is like a woman who hates you. It's all she does.
« Reply #19 on: October 08, 2006, 05:23:17 pm »
New avatar Bobby?
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Bobby Isosceles

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Re: October 6, 2006 - A phone is like a woman who hates you. It's all she does.
« Reply #20 on: October 08, 2006, 05:25:36 pm »
Quote from: AugustWest on October 08, 2006, 05:23:17 pm
New avatar Bobby?

My visit to Wombat's house this weekend has given me ammunition to win the 2006 touambies.
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wombat

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Re: October 6, 2006 - A phone is like a woman who hates you. It's all she does.
« Reply #21 on: October 08, 2006, 05:26:02 pm »


Quote from: Bobby Isosceles on October 08, 2006, 05:25:36 pm
My visit to Wombat's house this weekend has given me ammunition to win the 2006 touambies.

Bobby, my dogs are both females.  You must have been at the wrong address.
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Bobby Isosceles

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Re: October 6, 2006 - A phone is like a woman who hates you. It's all she does.
« Reply #22 on: October 08, 2006, 05:28:11 pm »
Quote from: wombat on October 08, 2006, 05:26:02 pm

Bobby, my dogs are both females.  You must have been at the wrong address.

Good cover-up! Why don't you also cover up the fact that you bought them little doggie strap-ons.
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linnea

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Re: October 6, 2006 - A phone is like a woman who hates you. It's all she does.
« Reply #23 on: October 08, 2006, 09:04:57 pm »
Dammit! I'm going to have to change my board settings now simply so I don't have to see that avatar.

I do not approve. That is just wrong.
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DanSC

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Re: October 6, 2006 - A phone is like a woman who hates you. It's all she does.
« Reply #24 on: October 09, 2006, 04:24:11 am »
The question on my mind is: are their legs still long?
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theinevitable

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Re: October 6, 2006 - A phone is like a woman who hates you. It's all she does.
« Reply #25 on: October 09, 2006, 04:56:36 am »
no, they shrunk back down.
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