The OFFICIAL Unofficial Achewood Message Board

Please login or register.

Login with username, password and session length
Advanced search  

News:

@achewood Today's Kim Jong-il Fact™: North Korean state media reports that Kim routinely shoots three or four holes-in-one per round. (Wikipedia)

Pages: [1] 2 3 4   Go Down

Author Topic: 13 October 2006 - a review of my life by Anthony Lane  (Read 8400 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

DanSC

  • YOUR OLD FRIEND BLISTER
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 8
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 79
    • View Profile
13 October 2006 - a review of my life by Anthony Lane
« on: October 13, 2006, 09:49:20 am »
http://achewood.com/index.php?date=10132006

Everyone be careful on this Judas Priest Friday...the 13th.
Logged
"If you can't have fun playin' with a toy truck, then it's time to reevaluate your life."

MattFish

  • Lie Bot
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 43
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 371
  • A perch with a cramp / Half-pound ahi burger
    • View Profile
Re: 13 October 2006 - a review of my life by Anthony Lane
« Reply #1 on: October 13, 2006, 11:16:33 am »
The idea is that the cat bought some shoes at a thrift store with a small side pocket and they happened to contain a review of his life by Anthony Lane, which he was not ready for
Logged
I finally found a nice picture of a giraffe

mrdna1

  • Chucklebot
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 8
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 163
    • View Profile
    • five-six
Re: 13 October 2006 - a review of my life by Anthony Lane
« Reply #2 on: October 13, 2006, 12:38:48 pm »
ugh, after getting snow for the past 16+ hours I think the flames of Hell are exactly what I need right now. BRING ON THE JUDAS PRIEST!
Logged

wombat

  • English-Speaking Pizza
  • Mod Squad
  • Dude since Knucklehead times
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 644
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 12493
  • Yeah man, these are pugs, not some fuck*ng lolcat.
    • View Profile
Re: 13 October 2006 - a review of my life by Anthony Lane
« Reply #3 on: October 13, 2006, 12:45:28 pm »
This one made me laugh. Come to think of it, it was probably the high point of my week.  I guess I am also not ready for a review of my life by Anthony Lane.  Or even someone less frightening.
Logged
What is this, the fuckin' Algonquin Round Table or some shit?  - Nabu

If you're going to change your life then you have to change it every day, not just the days the world isn't taking a shit on you. -Doc

CortJstr

  • Mod Squad
  • Philippe is standing on it
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 338
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 9820
  • Which gives us AN EXCUSE TO DRINK!
    • View Profile
Re: 13 October 2006 - a review of my life by Anthony Lane
« Reply #4 on: October 13, 2006, 12:48:26 pm »
Am I the only one who had never heard of this guy?
Logged

mrchee

  • Chucklebot
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: -4
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 163
  • -NULLAM REM NATAM-
    • View Profile
Re: 13 October 2006 - a review of my life by Anthony Lane
« Reply #5 on: October 13, 2006, 01:12:12 pm »
The stumps glow, like logs on a fire
Logged
If no one else can help, and if you can find them, maybe you can hire... The A-Team

arlucasinc

  • Chucklebot
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 6
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 132
    • View Profile
    • http://arlucasinc.livejournal.com
Re: 13 October 2006 - a review of my life by Anthony Lane
« Reply #6 on: October 13, 2006, 01:40:14 pm »
Quote from: CortJstr on October 13, 2006, 12:48:26 pm
Am I the only one who had never heard of this guy?

No. Even though I have a passing familiarity with JP, I don't have any of the band members on a first, last, firstname lastname, or lastname firstname basis.
Logged

jough

  • God's Own Dick
  • Administrator
  • Philippe is standing on it.
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 948
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 6871
  • If you've got the time, we've got El Guapo.
    • View Profile
    • poetry archives
Re: 13 October 2006 - a review of my life by Anthony Lane
« Reply #7 on: October 13, 2006, 01:41:45 pm »
I had to Google him, and then I found a really pretentious review he wrote about Star Wars Episode III.  He's a real tool - the kind of guy who thinks that what is popular must be wrong.  From what little I've read of him, he sounds like a poor man's William F. Buckley.
Logged

lylebot

  • Scrambles the Dog
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 0
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 1
    • View Profile
Re: 13 October 2006 - a review of my life by Anthony Lane
« Reply #8 on: October 13, 2006, 01:59:39 pm »
I registered so I could reply to this.

Anthony Lane is the film critic for the New Yorker.  He is one of the funniest and snarkiest reviewers out there.  Basically if he thinks a movie sucks he'll say it sucks, and spend most of the review making fun of it.  This is why Roast Beef is not ready for that:  he knows his life sucks and he's about the spend the rest of it getting made fun of by Anthony Lane.

From Anthony Lane's review of Star Wars III:
Quote
The general opinion of “Revenge of the Sith” seems to be that it marks a distinct improvement on the last two episodes, “The Phantom Menace” and “Attack of the Clones.” True, but only in the same way that dying from natural causes is preferable to crucifixion.
This is pretention?  I'd just call it snark.
Logged

mrchee

  • Chucklebot
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: -4
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 163
  • -NULLAM REM NATAM-
    • View Profile
Re: 13 October 2006 - a review of my life by Anthony Lane
« Reply #9 on: October 13, 2006, 02:00:41 pm »
I repeat: The stumps glow, like logs on a fire
Logged
If no one else can help, and if you can find them, maybe you can hire... The A-Team

V-Adore

  • Guest
Re: 13 October 2006 - a review of my life by Anthony Lane
« Reply #10 on: October 13, 2006, 02:54:46 pm »
The phrase "diatomaceous offal" brightens my day.

Also, full points for Onstad for reminding me of the best shoe concept ever. I want a pair of KangaRoos right now! Where else will I put my coins, or perhaps a note from a dude?
Logged

wombat

  • English-Speaking Pizza
  • Mod Squad
  • Dude since Knucklehead times
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 644
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 12493
  • Yeah man, these are pugs, not some fuck*ng lolcat.
    • View Profile
Re: 13 October 2006 - a review of my life by Anthony Lane
« Reply #11 on: October 13, 2006, 03:15:15 pm »
A few years ago Anthony Lane mentioned something in a review that made it clear that he was just about exactly my age.  I was floored by this because I had always assumed he was an 80 year old curmudgeon. Maybe because I thought it would take that long to arrive at that exquisite refinement of snideness.

In my recollection, he can be just as mean to things that are not popular.  Don't assume you'd get off easy in a review of your life just because you are not a blockbuster.
Logged
What is this, the fuckin' Algonquin Round Table or some shit?  - Nabu

If you're going to change your life then you have to change it every day, not just the days the world isn't taking a shit on you. -Doc

Limmo

  • roast beef (the middle cat)
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 40
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 1166
    • View Profile
Re: 13 October 2006 - a review of my life by Anthony Lane
« Reply #12 on: October 13, 2006, 03:27:05 pm »
Quote from: Asherdan on October 13, 2006, 03:07:30 pm

Judas Priest Friday is a great idea, but each return seems to lessen it somewhat.

Lessen it?  This one buried it.

Logged

nuero

  • Chucklebot
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 4
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 105
    • View Profile
Re: 13 October 2006 - a review of my life by Anthony Lane
« Reply #13 on: October 13, 2006, 03:42:53 pm »
Quote from: Mattgiraffe on October 13, 2006, 11:16:33 am
The idea is that the cat bought some shoes at a thrift store with a small side pocket and they happened to contain a review of his life by Anthony Lane, which he was not ready for

You guys should do this "oversimplification of strip in text" thing for EVERY strip, it just gets better every time I read it! Keep up the good work!
Logged

Bobby Isosceles

  • Guest
Re: 13 October 2006 - a review of my life by Anthony Lane
« Reply #14 on: October 13, 2006, 03:54:29 pm »
Quote from: nuero on October 13, 2006, 03:42:53 pm
You guys should do this "oversimplification of strip in text" thing for EVERY strip, it just gets better every time I read it! Keep up the good work!

The unpopular Brazilian attempts to use sarcasm to indicate his discontent.
Logged
Pages: [1] 2 3 4   Go Up
« previous next »