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Author Topic: Ray's Place! - 10th January, 07  (Read 3917 times)

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Drygioni

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Ray's Place! - 10th January, 07
« on: January 10, 2007, 07:37:07 am »
http://www.achewood.com/raysplace.php?date=01102007&allnav=

I don't always read through the entire thing of these, but I like the story about the D&D guy because it's so universally true. "Greetings humanoid", indeed.
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Re: Ray's Place! - 10th January, 07
« Reply #1 on: January 10, 2007, 01:47:21 pm »
I am so happy this is back, it was always one of my favorite things.  Perhaps because the advice column is one of my favorite literary forms.  And after all, advice columns and comics go together, at least if you are old enough to remember Newspapers.
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Re: Ray's Place! - 10th January, 07
« Reply #2 on: January 10, 2007, 04:06:44 pm »
Quote from: ray
Why you got to go past the sale — ain’t gettin’ married enough?

These little pearls make the necklace of Ray's Place.
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Re: Ray's Place! - 10th January, 07
« Reply #3 on: January 10, 2007, 05:07:19 pm »
Quote from: JudyIsADickSlap on January 10, 2007, 07:37:07 am
http://www.achewood.com/raysplace.php?date=01102007&allnav=

I don't always read through the entire thing of these, but I like the story about the D&D guy because it's so universally true. "Greetings humanoid", indeed.

It's like the episode of Psych at the BiMonSciFiCon where the geeky guy is constantly embarrassed but the main character not knowing the difference between red and blue kryptonite. And being stupid enough to say this out loud in front of people.
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littlefallsmets

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Re: Ray's Place! - 10th January, 07
« Reply #4 on: January 10, 2007, 05:48:39 pm »
Quote from: CortJstr
It's like the episode of Psych at the BiMonSciFiCon where the geeky guy is constantly embarrassed but the main character not knowing the difference between red and blue kryptonite.

To be fair, you gotta be reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeal dorky to go beyond green and red.

Green kills him, red makes him evil... well, in the movies and teevee show it made him evil. There's been like fifteen different ways red can work in the comics from... weakening him without killing him to doing something wacky and random like making him fat or half-ant or something.

But blue, you gotta be REALLY out of touch with reality to know what blue is. I never remember blue being in the movies or the teevee shows or anything like that. MAYBE in something slightly before my time like "Superfriends"? If it has never been in media other than the comics, it's kinda unfair to expect a sane person to know it.

Blue kills Bizarro.
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CortJstr

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Re: Ray's Place! - 10th January, 07
« Reply #5 on: January 10, 2007, 06:08:05 pm »
Quote from: littlefallsmets on January 10, 2007, 05:48:39 pm
To be fair, you gotta be reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeal dorky to go beyond green and red.

Green kills him, red makes him evil... well, in the movies and teevee show it made him evil. There's been like fifteen different ways red can work in the comics from... weakening him without killing him to doing something wacky and random like making him fat or half-ant or something.

But blue, you gotta be REALLY out of touch with reality to know what blue is. I never remember blue being in the movies or the teevee shows or anything like that. MAYBE in something slightly before my time like "Superfriends"? If it has never been in media other than the comics, it's kinda unfair to expect a sane person to know it.

Blue kills Bizarro.

I thought on the Superfriends (basically my only DC exposure, as I was a Marvel kid) blue healed him. I'd never heard of red before I started reading Super Dickery.
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littlefallsmets

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Re: Ray's Place! - 10th January, 07
« Reply #6 on: January 10, 2007, 06:31:09 pm »
Richard Pryor invented red kryptonite in one of the Superman movies!

I'd just assumed that... that made it the most well-known alt-kryptonite.

Also, on Smallville, there was a ring made of it... somehow... and it made Clark evil... somehow. But to be frank, Smallville doesn't count because... like... Clark has every young dork's highschool dream girl throwing herself at him every ten minutes and yet he keeps pining for the standofgiraffe girl who dates jocks and wears a necklace that will KILL you.

I can believe the dude can lift cars. I can believe the dude is bulletproof.

I can't believe the dude would spend years of his life chasing Lana while Chloe has been practically sending him postcards with a picture of her pu$$y and the words "Wish You Were Here" and is... exactly the kind of girl I wanted to like me in high school. Except those girls all liked boys with leather jackets and bass guitars and drinking problems and self-esteem and so forth.

I ain't gonna write no fanfiction about it but... it's why Smallville don't count. It just is.
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Bobby Isosceles

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Re: Ray's Place! - 10th January, 07
« Reply #7 on: January 10, 2007, 06:53:40 pm »
Quote from: CortJstr on January 10, 2007, 06:08:05 pm
I thought on the Superfriends (basically my only DC exposure, as I was a Marvel kid) blue healed him. I'd never heard of red before I started reading Super Dickery.

That's gold.
Shit, how the fuck did I know that.
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theinevitable

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Re: Ray's Place! - 10th January, 07
« Reply #8 on: January 10, 2007, 06:57:16 pm »
dude, tons of guys waste their time doing that.

also: you're right, that is exactly what those girls go for. Goddamnit.
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littlefallsmets

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Re: Ray's Place! - 10th January, 07
« Reply #9 on: January 10, 2007, 06:58:58 pm »
Quote from: Bobby Isosceles
That's gold.

I thought it was that gold just permanently took away their superpowers, leaving them essentially baseline people.

(How do I have a girlfriend if I'm debating this? How did this happen?)

EDIT:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kryptonite

Education.
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Bobby Isosceles

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Re: Ray's Place! - 10th January, 07
« Reply #10 on: January 10, 2007, 07:02:49 pm »
Quote from: littlefallsmets on January 10, 2007, 06:58:58 pm
I thought it was that gold just permanently took away their superpowers, leaving them essentially baseline people.

(How do I have a girlfriend if I'm debating this? How did this happen?)

EDIT:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kryptonite

Education.

Pink Kryptonite: From an alternate timeline in a 2003 Supergirl storyline by Peter David, this bizarre variety of kryptonite apparently turned heterosexual Kryptonians temporarily into homosexuals; it was seen in just one panel, with Superman giving flattering compliments to Jimmy Olsen about his wardrobe and decorative sense. It spoofs the more "innocent times" of the Silver Age (Lois Lane is depicted in this story as not understanding what's gotten into Superman).
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Ben-San

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Re: Ray's Place! - 10th January, 07
« Reply #11 on: January 10, 2007, 07:05:37 pm »
Gold Kryptonite never actually existed. It was a hoax that Superman used a few times, most notably to fuck with his imaginary-future son.
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Bobby Isosceles

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Re: Ray's Place! - 10th January, 07
« Reply #12 on: January 10, 2007, 07:07:50 pm »
Quote from: Ben-San on January 10, 2007, 07:05:37 pm
Gold Kryptonite never actually existed. It was a hoax that Superman used a few times, most notably to fuck with his imaginary-future son.

further dorkdom: some part of my brain is thinking

"Green: bad; Red: bad but in a different way; Gold: good!"

Not kryptonite? What is it then? What is causing this association. Then it hits me:

I'm thinking of 1st edition D&D dragons.
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V-Adore

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Re: Ray's Place! - 10th January, 07
« Reply #13 on: January 10, 2007, 07:10:16 pm »
Quote from: Bobby Isosceles on January 10, 2007, 07:07:50 pm
further dorkdom: some part of my brain is thinking

"Green: bad; Red: bad but in a different way; Gold: good!"

Not kryptonite? What is it then? What is causing this association. Then it hits me:

I'm thinking of 1st edition D&D dragons.


Also, I hasten to add, dragons from every edition of D&D onward. Some things never change, really...
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Ben-San

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Re: Ray's Place! - 10th January, 07
« Reply #14 on: January 10, 2007, 07:11:23 pm »
By the way, took me a few minutes but I found it.



(I guess the board doesn't like the full-size type version so here it is: http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v602/bensanaz/pinkkryptonite.jpg )
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