Print

Please login or register.
1 Hour 1 Day 1 Week 1 Month Forever
Login with username, password and session length

[littlefallsmets]

LFM, next time someone stares rudely at my bosom I will try not to get angry but rather imagine that they are being inspired to poetry.

a hiaku:

look at those titties
tart apples in morning dew
life is not so bad

[theinevitable]

man. I knew a girl like that. They were as big as her head.

Also: re: "everyone has a butt."
That is like saying everyone has breasts. I have breasts... but they aren't BREASTS.
you know?
I have seen at least one butt in my life that affirmed that life is good.

[rabidambulance]

All I'm saying is... a really beautiful chest is, like, life-affirming. You can see one that's so good that you're just happy to be alive. Like you just wanna tell people about it. Hand out magazines about it on Saturday mornings. So good that you feel sorry for gay fellows and straight ladies who cannot appreciate it fully.

A really beautiful chest can be such as someone reacts to a great smelling soap in a commerical.

Asses can be sexy or rude or full-on disrespectful... but they can't give you an Irish Spring moment of clarity.

And by "you" I of course mean "me".

You lie.  There are asses for which I would commit unpardonable sins.  And they're the type that can only be found on ladies(*), not on me.

(*) I'm sure the same is true for man-asses, but since that's never been my thing, well, its never been my thing.

[littlefallsmets]

I was so disturbed - not by the titties or ass, but how the ladies are basically human-noid with cat ears.  There was a comic book like this.  I don't remember what it was called.  But there was a bunch of humanoid looking animals that had sex all the time.  It was awful.

For me, the disturbing part is not so much the ears as it is... the nose and mouth. The weird-ass bulldog-like nose and mouth that Chris draws on his cats. It's like someone else said... you're panning up the drawing and... nice legs... decent stomach... rude, rude titties and then... AGH, BULLDOG FACE! P-TOooo! P-TOooo!

It is like a chocolate of the finest gourmet shell with a still-steaming turd at the centre.

As for the comic... do you mean "Hepcats"? The one with the scary rhino head man? That one always weirded me out too. Unless you mean some thing far more explicitly pornographic, such as would be in the porno comics section in the back of the shop, next to... like... Heavy Metal and Cherry Poptart or whatever. In that case, you're on your own.

Also re: rude titties - I totally have rude titties.  I have to be very careful, because they are the equivalent of telling someone their momma's so fat.  My titties will straight up tell you they think the dinner you cooked was awful, then spit in your face.  My titties do not leave a tip no matter how excellent the service.

This line of thinking makes me think of that Japanese Mr. Sparkle commerical on the Simpsons.

"Mr. Sparkle's titties are disrespectful to dirt!"

I applaud you, however, for understanding and controlling your rude titties.

My girlfriend has rather rude titties herself and it is all she can do to stop them from sassing back to elders.

[theinevitable]

one of my good friends has titties that are... the RUDEST.
They sneak up on you, too. Suddenly you look at her and say... WHAT.

[Roger]

I was so disturbed - not by the titties or ass, but how the ladies are basically human-noid with cat ears.  There was a comic book like this.  I don't remember what it was called.  But there was a bunch of humanoid looking animals that had sex all the time.  It was awful.

You must be talking about Omaha. The guy who drew that even went as far as putting tails on his characters, something that Onstad doesn't seem to care about. Fortunately, I guess.

[Sub_Topical]

The shades and the far off gaze of the rude pair cat gave it the twisted stink of an '80s Camaro ad homage (being polite). I'd swear the setup was pulled from something on the tip of memory. Something swimsuit poster-ish.

That sorta familiarity makes for the creep.

No, I will not google image search to confirm. Enough nightmare fuel.

[side_show]

You must be talking about Omaha. The guy who drew that even went as far as putting tails on his characters, something that Onstad doesn't seem to care about. Fortunately, I guess.

Yes.  Omaha was exactly what I was thinking of.  Good work.  Definitly much more pornographic than something like Heavy Metal.  Seeing a dog with an errect human c*ck hacing inter-species sex is something I do not want to see again, and the rude titties of this strip totally brought me back to that place.  It's is a cold, sad place.

[littlefallsmets]

Having read the Omaha wikipedia entry...

I'm pretty frightened.

It is bad enough, weird enough that you're doing a strip about explicit sex between cat-people... but... people are into all sorts of weird crap. I am pretty much at peace with the fact that there are people who get off on things I find horrifying and/or comical.

But... the lead character escapes sexual discrimination in an office setting by becoming a stripper?

No. I'm all for "sex positive feminism" as the wikipedia entry put it but... no. No. Sorry, no.

You know how everybody says "well, okay, a lot of strippers probably do it because their self-esteem is screwed up by some childhood emotional scar but I'm sure there are probably many who are just making money the easy way and we shouldn't judge them as exploited because..." etc etc etc.

Well, I'm made some friends out here who spent years working at strip bars as DJs and bartenders and bouncers and... it is their professional opinion that the latter stripper does not actually exist, the so-bleeding-heart-that-you-do-a-360 image of the liberated empowered stripper does not exist.

"They're all deeply damaged and fighting through Daddy issues, every single one of them."

I am a very liberal guy... but I'm not gonna try and out-liberal other people by meta-ing myself into thinking that there's some way that grinding truckers' faces for dollar bills at three in the morning can be the zesty and dignified expression of liberated sexuality.

And...

It's one thing when you want to have sex with a person who is half-cat that you draw comics of half-cat people fuck*ng. It is quite another when you go to deep lengths to innoculate your quasi-beastiality with half-baked pseudo-progressive sexual theory.

The skunkfucker doth protest too much so to speak.

[nDed]

a hiaku:

look at those titties
tart apples in morning dew
life is not so bad

This is beautiful
Though it's not quite a haiku
Needs less syllables

[jaydub]

I applaud you, however, for understanding and controlling your rude titties.
My girlfriend has rather rude titties herself and it is all she can do to stop them from sassing back to elders.

My ladies' are rather demure - and their super powers are limited to telling the temperature.  This doesn't seem to be uncommon however.

[littlefallsmets]

This is beautiful
Though it's not quite a haiku
Needs less syllables

seven syllables
then five and seven again
or am I backwards?

[nDed]

seven syllables
then five and seven again
or am I backwards?

It's five-seven-five
This I believe to be right
But what do I know?

[littlefallsmets]

look at those titt-ies (5)
tart app-les in morn-ing dew (7)
life is not so bad (5)

seems correct?

[nDed]

Tart(1) App(2) -les(3) In(4) The(5) Mor(6) -ning(7) Dew(

-TOUAMB Poetry Jam

Edit: Oops, my mistake 

We should start a thread
Where all the conversations
Are in haiku form

(or not)