The OFFICIAL Unofficial Achewood Message Board

Please login or register.

Login with username, password and session length
Advanced search  

News:

@achewood Chris waited all day for the Comcast repair guy, and he never showed up. What is he supposed to do with this cream pie?

Pages: 1 ... 15 16 [17] 18   Go Down

Author Topic: Two Truths and a Lie  (Read 39609 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

robot_god

  • roast beef (the middle cat)
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 74
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 1195
  • Oh my gosh, dude.
    • View Profile
    • ALP Myspace Site
Re: Two Truths and a Lie
« Reply #240 on: April 05, 2007, 05:17:06 am »
Quote from: RMJ12345 on April 04, 2007, 11:12:27 pm
3. I am allergic to nothing.

Yeah, I'm pretty sure a cotton allergy doesn't exist.  If a person had a type 1 allergic reaction to cotton, they would pretty much have to live in a bubble to avoid any cotton.  And if they didn't, they would either die or become desensitized pretty quickly, either way eliminating the allergy.

Back in grade school, if you brought in cupcakes for your birthday, you had to bring some non-chocolate ones because supposedly at least one girl I can remember was allergic to chocolate.  Complete bullshit, I'm sure.  What a shame her parents just lied to her like that, 'you're not allowed to eat chocolate.'  They were total overbearing douchebags.  Fuck those crap people.

I dunno if that was a thing anywhere else, where you brought treats to school on your birthday?  I wonder if that flies anymore since the post-9/11 anthrax scare.  Man, that was my favorite time, the post-9/11 anthrax scare.  I saw this dirty cardboard box outside a closed-down Key Food covered with white powder and I knew, "we doin' this."  Shame though, it's kind of less funny in retrospect.

I don't think terror alert levels existed at that point.  Good thing: they would have had to invent a new color to accurately gauge that terror threat.
« Last Edit: April 05, 2007, 05:26:23 am by robot_god »
Logged
ACHIEVE

theinevitable

  • Writer's Workshoppers
  • Dude since Knucklehead times
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 486
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 12139
    • View Profile
    • tweet tweet fun fun
Re: Two Truths and a Lie
« Reply #241 on: April 05, 2007, 06:23:39 am »
my friend is allergic to chocolate. She won't die or anything, she just gets all bloated and stuff. It's really unfortunate.
Logged
Social pressures exist
And if you think about them all of the time
You're gonna find that your head's been kicked in
You're gonna do it all for the grind

Doc

  • Growing Cucumbers of Impressive Dimensions
  • Writer's Workshoppers
  • Philippe is standing on it.
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 1408
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 5017
  • an emergency backup pug
    • View Profile
Re: Two Truths and a Lie
« Reply #242 on: April 05, 2007, 10:41:42 am »
I assumed the cotton allergy thing was made up but then I googled it and found out it existed so it just semed crazy enough to be true.
Logged
Inev: 'A lot of things are ridiculous if you think about them long enough, you know?'

pmcd9

  • Mod Squad
  • Dude since Knucklehead times
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 608
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 12778
  • The Kid is up to no good
    • View Profile
Re: Two Truths and a Lie
« Reply #243 on: April 06, 2007, 02:39:40 am »
My friend Barbara is allergic to Chocolate.
Logged
I hope I never have to refer to a scone in spoken conversation.

rowboat

  • Chucklebot
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: -2666
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 180
    • View Profile
    • The Rats and People Motion Picture Orchestra
Re: Two Truths and a Lie
« Reply #244 on: December 03, 2009, 09:48:17 pm »
1) In the 1970s, my father made (and subsequently lost) a fortune trafficking heroin throughout the Midwest.

2) I have never been in love.

3) I have never ranked better than 4th in a pie eating contest.
Logged
PS  I got shot by Ray again

bluemoon72

  • Lyle
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 63
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Female
  • Posts: 499
  • 2009 TOUAMB Newbie of the Year
    • View Profile
    • facebook friend me, muthafuckas
Re: Two Truths and a Lie
« Reply #245 on: December 03, 2009, 10:06:27 pm »
Quote from: rowboat on December 03, 2009, 09:48:17 pm
1) In the 1970s, my father made (and subsequently lost) a fortune trafficking heroin throughout the Midwest.

2) I have never been in love.

3) I have never ranked better than 4th in a pie eating contest.

Hmmm...I think #3 is the lie.  I bet you've won a pie eating contest.
Logged
Quit moanin' at me! What's in the box?

jaydub

  • VIP
  • Philippe is standing on it.
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 1493
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 5056
  • Arrant pedantry
    • View Profile
Re: Two Truths and a Lie
« Reply #246 on: December 03, 2009, 10:30:02 pm »
I'd like to see a contest eating pecan pies.  I bet it would take hours.
Logged
If you desire peace, work for justice.

littlefallsmets

  • Writer's Workshoppers
  • Philippe is standing on it.
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 363
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 6294
  • the perfect is the enemy of the good
    • View Profile
    • this is where I jot down random ideas
Re: Two Truths and a Lie
« Reply #247 on: December 03, 2009, 10:42:07 pm »
Everybody's been in love.
Logged
I do the Tweets @Cecconi140

jay-ell

  • Den Mother
  • VIP
  • Philippe is standing on it.
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 407
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Female
  • Posts: 7869
    • View Profile
Re: Two Truths and a Lie
« Reply #248 on: December 04, 2009, 12:16:50 am »
I think #1 is the lie. Reverse-reverse psychology. It's too unbelievable to be true, so we'll naturally assume that it is.
Logged
"I always hear 'punch me in the face' when you're speaking. But it's usually subtext." -- Martin Freeman as John Watson

Arachno-capitalist

  • Jacobean Fuckbot
  • Mom-Mom's Weepin' Eye
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 319
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 3967
  • Ostriches and I have a history. So I eat them.
    • View Profile
Re: Two Truths and a Lie
« Reply #249 on: December 04, 2009, 12:18:08 am »
The lie is you. You are the lie. You stare at mirrors only to witness death in action and have never eaten a pie.
Logged
Guy at my watering hole: "Acap, why do you keep coming to Jack's?They just serve shitty burgers and happen to have beers on tap."
Acap: I was thirsty one day and I sat down. A year later, Jack's was built around me and thirst is a recurring thing.

pmcd9

  • Mod Squad
  • Dude since Knucklehead times
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 608
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 12778
  • The Kid is up to no good
    • View Profile
Re: Two Truths and a Lie
« Reply #250 on: December 04, 2009, 02:48:44 am »
I'm gonna go with number 3 because they don't keep track of who came in fourth place in a pie eating contest.  The know who the winner is and maybe second place, but that's as far as they keep track.
Logged
I hope I never have to refer to a scone in spoken conversation.

wombat

  • English-Speaking Pizza
  • Moderator
  • Dude since Knucklehead times
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 644
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 12493
  • Yeah man, these are pugs, not some fuck*ng lolcat.
    • View Profile
Re: Two Truths and a Lie
« Reply #251 on: December 04, 2009, 02:54:09 am »
Paul knows a lot about pie eating contests.
Logged
What is this, the fuckin' Algonquin Round Table or some shit?  - Nabu

If you're going to change your life then you have to change it every day, not just the days the world isn't taking a shit on you. -Doc

pmcd9

  • Mod Squad
  • Dude since Knucklehead times
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 608
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 12778
  • The Kid is up to no good
    • View Profile
Re: Two Truths and a Lie
« Reply #252 on: December 04, 2009, 03:13:47 am »
Quote from: wombat on December 04, 2009, 02:54:09 am
Paul knows a lot about pie eating contests.

No, never been to one actually. 
Logged
I hope I never have to refer to a scone in spoken conversation.

greenkoolayd

  • VIP
  • Sanryobuki Artificial Liver
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 697
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 2889
  • i make passes at girls who wear glasses.
    • View Profile
    • mi facebook
Re: Two Truths and a Lie
« Reply #253 on: December 04, 2009, 03:16:13 am »
Quote from: wombat on December 04, 2009, 02:54:09 am
Paul knows a lot about pie eating contests.

is that a fat joke?
Logged
"I could tell you the first rule of Spite Club, but I won’t."

rowboat

  • Chucklebot
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: -2666
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 180
    • View Profile
    • The Rats and People Motion Picture Orchestra
Re: Two Truths and a Lie
« Reply #254 on: December 04, 2009, 05:11:04 am »
With a sweeping, obvious and totally true statement, littlefallsmets wins the round. My heart is so full of love that I sometimes think it'll explode.

On the other hand, dad was a wild child (fortune earned) and ultimately a convicted felon (fortune lost). And though Paul is correct in his assessment of the vagaries of rankings in pie eating contests, I can tell you with certainty that I finished nearly last (out of something like ten participants) in the one such contest I ever entered based simply on the amount of pie left in front of me. It was a speed test and I underestimated the importance of water to break down each bite for faster swallowing. If I ever enter another one, I'm going to make sure that it's based on the amount of pie eaten rather than how fast a pie is eaten. I think I could kick some serious ass in a quantity battle.

Anyway, let's revive this thread. I love this game and it's the first time I've ever had the opportunity to play it in this format.
Logged
PS  I got shot by Ray again
Pages: 1 ... 15 16 [17] 18   Go Up
« previous next »