Dear Mom who called me to complain about the letter I sent home with each student reminding them of the banning of beans, nuts and products containing beans or nuts from the reception after your child's performance.
Fuck you. Seriously, go fuck yourself. Like it says in the letter, several of our students have sever, fatal, allergies to these items. Several. Several means more than one or two or three or four or five. Several. Did you realize you were an insensitive bitch when I explained to you that two of our students had to go to the hospital, and could have died from whatever exposure they had to their allergins outside our building in the last year? Could you tell I wanted to reach through the phone and gouge you in the eye when you snickered when I suggested you bring fruit or veggetables if you weren't sure what might be safe to bring? Were you embarrassed when you complained that you were having trouble reading labels and I suggested you ask someone at the store to help you read them? Were you as embarrassed as I was for you when I explained that you could simply not bring anything if you found this too difficult to figure out?
Do you know what I liked best about you, Mom-who-is-teaching-her-child-to-be-a-selgiraffe-ass? I liked how you explicitly told me you had "accidentally" bought Oreo Cakesters for your child to share at the reception without reading the label, but now realized they contained ingredients that are poisen to some of our students, then you asked me what you were supposed to do with them. I love how I said you need to keep them at home, and that since you are lucky enough to have a child who will not die of exposure to soy or nuts, that I'm sure your child will enjoy them. I like how even though we had this conversation, that your child brought these very Oreo Cakesters to the program the next day and gave them out during a break when no one was supposed to be eating anything. I like how on the label it clearly says they contain soy and that they are made on equipment that processes peanuts and tree nuts. I like how you managed to send a single product that contained all three of the allergens that nearly killed two other students. And that one of those students was in your child's class.
I tell you what I'm going to do. I'm going to have a child, and slowly build of his tolerance to arsenic. Then I'm going to send him to your child's lunch room at school with a bag full of arsenic coated Oreo Ratsters for lunch. And maybe while my kid and yours are laughing and having fun, my kid might sprinkle some of his arsenic on your kids food by accident, or his arsenic covered hands might touch some of your child's food, or maybe he'll even be generous enough to share his Ratsters with your son. I mean, why shouldn't my child enjoy his arsenic treats just because your child hasn't built up a tolerance to arsenic?
In closing,
Fuck you, you are shit.
Sincerely,
Me
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Topic: Nuts to you! (Read 12068 times)