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[CortJstr]

I forgot to add three more:

1) My best friend's mom, my next-door neighbor, and my first grade teacher were all the same person. 

2) I was nearly held back in first grade due to a complex series of misunderstandings with the teacher. 

3) I took cut-rate piano lessons from the school music teacher for a brief period, but my mother declared him a "creepy old man" and discontinued the lessons after just a few weeks. 

Boy, some of these not even Pedro would know except by process of elimination. 

1) sounds like my life. My first elementary school principal was my godfather. My 1st grade teacher was my best friend's mom. My 4th grade teacher was my mom's best friend and we went to Vegas with her and her husband for my 21st birthday.

[jay-ell]

1. I was the first kid in my class to be able to read. Ditto with tie my shoes, ride a bike, etc. I was really big on Milestone Achievements

2. At one point in 5th grade the popular girls in the school decided they would torment me by acting like they had big crushes on me, asking me to talk about nerdy things, chasing me around the playground, etc. It got to the point where I would hide in the bathroom if I saw them coming.

3. My fourth grade teacher used to make me sit out of recess almost every day for talking in class, and my mom had to have a meeting with her after she yelled at me until I cried (I do not remember this, but some other kid in class was so upset by this that he told his mom) At the meeting she told my mom that I wasn't very smart.

Wow, the memories I'm coming up with are really weird.

2 is the lie.  Either inev is really cleverly playing off what we know about his current love life to deliberately mislead us, or...

Damn, that would explain some things. 

[wombat]

and wombat: 3 is the lie for you, also. You came to eat squid late in life.

BZZZZZ.

Nope. My family is Italian, and I ate calamari from a young age.

JL is right, but her reasoning is wrong. The first album I bought was actually Bobby Sherman, which is equally "stuff old people liked when they were young," but possibly even more embarassing than the lie.

And I didn't visit Disneyland till I was around 40, I think.

[jay-ell]

Yeah, I was barely 100 pounds when I was 14.  Aside from a generally short stature, I wasn't all that into eating.  I'd happily read the day away and go to bed without a single meal.  Once I started playing competetive sports I had to make up for this, but it was a chore to eat as much as most of my peers did.  I don't remember the exact day I hit 100, but I remember the feeling of accomplishment. We had a scale that had a little metal disc with the weight numbers that spun back and forth until it eventually settled at the reading.  I can still visualize the moment.

I think I weighed about 100 lbs when I met Pedro.  And I was about 5'5 by then.  I was a rail. 

My dad has this great story about drinking about six gallons of water in order to make the football team his freshman year of high school.  Apparently they wouldn't give you a uniform unless you weighed at least 100 lbs.  Four years later, as a senior, he wrestled at 102. 

I think 3 is the lie, because the other two just FEEL real to me.

Hm, nope.  3 is true.  2 is the false one, but only because I was nearly held back in Kindergarten.  I would not have been so sneaky, but I think I've talked about this before. 

Edit: Here's the story. 

Double Edit: That thread also reveals that #1 is inev's lie. 

Wow, that *does* explain some things. 

[theinevitable]

yeah.

I was really really slow to learn all of those things.
That thing with those girls did happen, but it was in a context where... even in 5th grade, I was girl-smart enough to know that they were mocking me or something. Also, even then, I was not really attracted to the "popular" girls. I had a lot of little-kid crushes, though, as you would imagine.
the last one, yeah, that one is true. That lady was not very nice.

[CortJstr]

I bet everyone's glad like me that you were the topic started today, JL. This is so much better than those 'Ash picks a fight' days.

Says you!

[jay-ell]

Okay. 

1) I have never seen my mom's boobs.  She's extremely modest. 

2) My best friend was overweight, and we were bullied by some boys who called us "fatty and flatty." 

3) After seeing my dad's younger sister breastfeed my cousin, I started walking around pretending to nurse my baby dolls. 

[KeithHernandez]

1 I watched Lady and the Tramp over 500 times

2 The first album I owned was Garth Brooks- Rodeo

3 Even though my first b was in 7th grade and I got a 100 percent on every spelling test, I was held inside during recesses because my 3rd grade teacher thought my writing was too bad.  Now it is pretty good.

[Drygioni]

Judy, the nose theme is genius, but I doubt you broke your own.

I'm ashamed to admit that this was infact true. I was upset about having to get out the sandpit, so instead of kicking off in a strop I very slowly and deliberately informed everyone that I would walk into a wall if I wasn't allowed to play with the sand.

Unfortunately, I was dismissed as attention seeking, so I decided to really show them. I walked at a normal, leisurely pace into the wall, and until then I hadn't really noticed how hard walls were. And I have a naturally big nose, so ouch, lots of blood etc, and now my nose is even bigger.

JL, you were correct in that I have never broken a girl's nose, and I am pleased to inform everyone that I have never broken a girl's ANYTHING. Now stop sniggering at the back there.

[jay-ell]

1 I watched Lady and the Tramp over 500 times

2 The first album I owned was Garth Brooks- Rodeo

3 Even though my first b was in 7th grade and I got a 100 percent on every spelling test, I was held inside during recesses because my 3rd grade teacher thought my writing was too bad.  Now it is pretty good.

I think 2 is the lie.  It's too mundane to be true.  And the thread I linked to before also supports #3. 

Plus, I like the idea of a Lady-and-Tramp-obsessed mini-Keith running around.  So I hope that's not the lie. 

[AlohaDawg]

Hmmm. I still can't believe Judy broke his OWN nose, I'm thinking Ash would be the one with the cops even at an early age, and I have no problems believing the newts or the partridge family with Wombat but the squid thing could work, too, except for a kid of <12. But with that last name, I guess Christmas Eve would be tough without some Squid and maybe Eel, too.

So here's some pre-adolescent AD trivia or not for you:

1) I had a near-death out-of body experience while inhaling toluol (active ingredient in model glue)

2) I used to watch re-runs of petticoat junction because of the dumb brunette girl (never occurred to me that by that time, she was probably 60 years old...)

3) First album I bought with my own money was "Glass Houses" by Billy Joel

[Carlos del Vaca]

1.  The first album I ever bought was "ELO's Greatest Hits."
2.  I fell off the roof of the front porch of our house when I was about 10, but sustained no major injuries.
3.  One morning about that same time my brother and I were puzzled to find "DOG" written on the dog in magic marker.  We suspected our father had been drinking.

Bonus true item:  I came in second in the school district spelling bee in 5th grade.  Seven years later, the first boobs I ever saw live and in person belonged to the girl who won said spelling bee.

[Choop]

Bonus true item:  I came in second in the school district spelling bee in 5th grade.  Seven years later, the first boobs I ever saw live and in person belonged to the girl who won said spelling bee.

folks ain't nerd love cute

[KeithHernandez]

So wait, I forgot to lie.  I think I was supposed to put the first album i ever BOUGHT was Rodeo.  A friend (who is now in Wayne Coynes nephews band incidentally) gave it to me for like my 5th birthday.  I never listened to it.

[jay-ell]

Outstanding question roundup:

1) I have never seen my mom's boobs.  She's extremely modest. 

2) My best friend was overweight, and we were bullied by some boys who called us "fatty and flatty." 

3) After seeing my dad's younger sister breastfeed my cousin, I started walking around pretending to nurse my baby dolls. 

1) I had a near-death out-of body experience while inhaling toluol (active ingredient in model glue)

2) I used to watch re-runs of petticoat junction because of the dumb brunette girl (never occurred to me that by that time, she was probably 60 years old...)

3) First album I bought with my own money was "Glass Houses" by Billy Joel

1.  The first album I ever bought was "ELO's Greatest Hits."
2.  I fell off the roof of the front porch of our house when I was about 10, but sustained no major injuries.
3.  One morning about that same time my brother and I were puzzled to find "DOG" written on the dog in magic marker.  We suspected our father had been drinking.

I've answered bunches of these, so I'm gonna let someone else have a go.  Just wanted to put them all out there since they're on different pages.