The OFFICIAL Unofficial Achewood Message Board

Please login or register.

Login with username, password and session length
Advanced search  

News:

@achewood Would Star Trek have had the same gravitas if Spock had been named Vince?

Pages: [1]   Go Down

Author Topic: 5 June 2008 - Letting a teenage girl touch me on the jazz hose  (Read 2190 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Arachno-capitalist

  • Jacobean Fuckbot
  • Mom-Mom's Weepin' Eye
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 319
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 3967
  • Ostriches and I have a history. So I eat them.
    • View Profile
5 June 2008 - Letting a teenage girl touch me on the jazz hose
« on: June 06, 2008, 12:28:35 am »
http://www.achewood.com/index.php?date=06052008
I wish he would take my advice about the love contract.
Logged
Guy at my watering hole: "Acap, why do you keep coming to Jack's?They just serve shitty burgers and happen to have beers on tap."
Acap: I was thirsty one day and I sat down. A year later, Jack's was built around me and thirst is a recurring thing.

wombat

  • English-Speaking Pizza
  • Mod Squad
  • Dude since Knucklehead times
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 644
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 12493
  • Yeah man, these are pugs, not some fuck*ng lolcat.
    • View Profile
Re: 5 June 2008 - A science fair project about scoring with gross fellows
« Reply #1 on: June 06, 2008, 12:41:51 am »
I am sorry, but that is the wrong thread title.

Also: I imagine that this is an exceptional situation, but I've taken a long hard look at our mailman and there isn't a thing wrong with him except that, tragically, he smokes.  Just as well, I suppose.
Logged
What is this, the fuckin' Algonquin Round Table or some shit?  - Nabu

If you're going to change your life then you have to change it every day, not just the days the world isn't taking a shit on you. -Doc

jaydub

  • VIP
  • Philippe is standing on it.
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 1493
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 5056
  • Arrant pedantry
    • View Profile
Re: 5 June 2008 - Letting a teenage girl touch me on the jazz hose
« Reply #2 on: June 06, 2008, 12:42:28 am »
Also a good title: "gettink some hot porky cha cha"
Logged
If you desire peace, work for justice.

CortJstr

  • Mod Squad
  • Philippe is standing on it
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 338
  • Online Online
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 9820
  • Which gives us AN EXCUSE TO DRINK!
    • View Profile
Re: 5 June 2008 - Letting a teenage girl touch me on the jazz hose
« Reply #3 on: June 06, 2008, 12:50:20 am »
This might be my new "introducing people to Achewood" strip. There are so many good lines, plus the best alt-text ever.
Logged

Doc

  • Growing Cucumbers of Impressive Dimensions
  • Writer's Workshoppers
  • Philippe is standing on it.
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 1408
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 5017
  • an emergency backup pug
    • View Profile
Re: 5 June 2008 - a pearlescent enamel casing
« Reply #4 on: June 06, 2008, 02:04:23 am »
It's been too long since we've seen Vlad.
Logged
Inev: 'A lot of things are ridiculous if you think about them long enough, you know?'

colmore

  • Lie Bot
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 56
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 379
  • Sorry Mom, Sorry Dad, Sorry College
    • View Profile
Re: 5 June 2008 - Letting a teenage girl touch me on the jazz hose
« Reply #5 on: June 06, 2008, 04:13:39 am »
There was a very brief moment when I was seeing someone a bit too young (broke (age+7)/2 by a year and a half).  She was cool and I was neither the first nor last older dude she'd date.  The first moment I was around her friends though.... that was it for me and young ladies.
Logged
In Capitalist America, bank robs you!

iron_felix

  • Lie Bot
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 65
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 373
    • View Profile
Re: 5 June 2008 - He said both "sorry" and "thanks" the instant he came
« Reply #6 on: June 06, 2008, 06:29:25 am »
What happened to Vlad's chin?  Or was that just a seductive smile he was wearing for all those years?

I like how Onstad just left the Molly/Téodor thing hanging, then rattled off consecutive strips discussing fidelity and cheating.  Foreshadowing, perhaps?  Does Mr. Bear already know?  Or was it just a one-off about which we will never hear anything more ever again?  Even if that is all it was, does that necessarily mean that nothing actually went down?  At this stage, there's no way of telling any of these things.
Logged

colmore

  • Lie Bot
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 56
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 379
  • Sorry Mom, Sorry Dad, Sorry College
    • View Profile
Re: 5 June 2008 - Letting a teenage girl touch me on the jazz hose
« Reply #7 on: June 09, 2008, 03:20:05 am »
Hah.  I just realized I quoted the law wrong up there.  Like... R. Kelly wrong.
Logged
In Capitalist America, bank robs you!

Doc

  • Growing Cucumbers of Impressive Dimensions
  • Writer's Workshoppers
  • Philippe is standing on it.
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 1408
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 5017
  • an emergency backup pug
    • View Profile
Re: 5 June 2008 - Letting a teenage girl touch me on the jazz hose
« Reply #8 on: June 09, 2008, 04:13:36 am »
I was going to say, by that calculation I can hook up with 15 year olds which seems rather wrong.
Logged
Inev: 'A lot of things are ridiculous if you think about them long enough, you know?'

iron_felix

  • Lie Bot
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 65
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 373
    • View Profile
Re: 5 June 2008 - Letting a teenage girl touch me on the jazz hose
« Reply #9 on: June 09, 2008, 04:30:24 am »
I could hook up with a 14½ year old, which I believe is actually legal in Georgia if you get the parents' permission and then marry her first.  I never realized there was any actual mathematical formula involved, though.  I guess age ain't nothing but an independent variable.
Logged

Choop

  • Mod Squad
  • LAZARUS, Tasseled Loafer of the Powerful
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 1010
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 4260
  • www dot at rick and morty dot com www
    • View Profile
Re: 5 June 2008 - Letting a teenage girl touch me on the jazz hose
« Reply #10 on: June 09, 2008, 07:47:02 am »
the real formula is
(age/2)+7

so like i'm 31 so i could date older than 24. makes sense.
Logged
Nobody exists on purpose; nobody belongs anywhere; everybody's gonna die. Come watch TV?

Victoria Waterfield

  • Molly
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 336
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 739
  • FUCK YOU, MIKE!
    • View Profile
Re: 5 June 2008 - Letting a teenage girl touch me on the jazz hose
« Reply #11 on: June 09, 2008, 03:34:22 pm »
Quote from: Choopernickel on June 09, 2008, 07:47:02 am
the real formula is
(age/2)+7

so like i'm 31 so i could date older than 24. makes sense.

Dogg don't sell yourself short

31/2 = 15.5 + 7 = 22.5

Mo ladies mo ladies mo ladies
Logged

Victoria Waterfield

  • Molly
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 336
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 739
  • FUCK YOU, MIKE!
    • View Profile
Re: 5 June 2008 - Letting a teenage girl touch me on the jazz hose
« Reply #12 on: June 09, 2008, 03:38:22 pm »
The corresponding formula for women is (age - 7)*2
Logged

jay-ell

  • Den Mother
  • VIP
  • Philippe is standing on it.
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 407
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Female
  • Posts: 7869
    • View Profile
Re: 5 June 2008 - Letting a teenage girl touch me on the jazz hose
« Reply #13 on: June 09, 2008, 03:46:55 pm »
Quote from: Choopernickel on June 09, 2008, 07:47:02 am
the real formula is
(age/2)+7

so like i'm 31 so i could date older than 24. makes sense.

Hmmm...

Hey, A-CAP, when's your birthday? 
Logged
"I always hear 'punch me in the face' when you're speaking. But it's usually subtext." -- Martin Freeman as John Watson

Death Ray

  • Chucklebot
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 4
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 151
    • View Profile
    • Deep Fried, webcomics' dirty little secret
Re: 5 June 2008 - Letting a teenage girl touch me on the jazz hose
« Reply #14 on: June 09, 2008, 09:16:25 pm »
If I lived a thousand years I would not have come up with as cool a name for my wand as "jazz hose".
Logged
Pages: [1]   Go Up
« previous next »