Print

Please login or register.
1 Hour 1 Day 1 Week 1 Month Forever
Login with username, password and session length

[AugustWest]

Yeah.

Let's work on some new material.  I got a lighter.

That Charley Smuckles.  He is a hoot and a holler.

http://achewood.com/index.php?date=05112009

[Victoria Waterfield]

If Charley Smuckles was really on the shizznit ball he'd be figuring out how to double bill this guy with the Roasted Beef.

OOOOOOOHHHHHHH SSSSHHHIIIIITTTTT

[Toaster]

This is amazing. "Ice-Face Trippa'". Genius. "SKELETON FINGA ON THA TRIGGA" "Balls in motion".

[Cap'n Squeakers]

Other than some amusing catchphrases (Noted above), my big take-away from this strip is that Onstad thinks rapping 18th century Welshmen are much funnier than I do.

[theinevitable]

People think that rapping white dudes are hilarious, and they rarely are.

[littlefallsmets]

This reminds me of... I don't remember the name... but wasn't there a Hasidic rapper for a while that all the Pabst-Blue-Ribbon phony trustfund WilliamsburgBrooklyn hipster bastards were going ga-ga over? And then when people found out that while, yeah, he was from a Hasidic family, he wasn't nearly as culturally isolated in his youth or naive as he was playing up and... when that went down, they all abandoned him because they never liked the music, they liked the concept of the performer just like the hipsters that should be hung from the neck until dead that they are?

Anyway, this reminds me of that guy.

[Toaster]

I would really honestly un-ironically like to see rap adaptations of epic poetry. It's all "The Exploits of Awesome Dudes", which is well within the established parameters of the medium. Thoughts?

[theinevitable]

lfm-- the version I heard of that story was more along the lines of him deciding to stop being a rapper.

Unless there is more than one hasidic rapper?

[littlefallsmets]

Perhaps there were multiple hasidic rappers, yeah.

It seems like the kind of ironic wacky zip-tang zany hipster idea that more than one person would toss out there.

Amish shoegaze act coming out next, I'm sure, talking about how they saw a girl while they were bailing hay and don't know how to talk to her.

[KeithHernandez]

Shoegaze is completely dependent on electricity, you know this right?

Also, most (good?) shoegaze uses voices as instruments more than lyrics.

Also, there was only one hasidic rappers, just your fucked up way of viewing things you don't understand is destroying your outlook.

Do you know why it is called shoegaze?  You have been harping on that a lot in your "jokes" recently.  It is probably the most organic sub-genre name ever.  It comes from people looking at their shoes (or pedals, cause they use a lot of them to make new and exciting (ten years ago) hipster noises).  Just so you know.  Also, the whole ten years ago thing.  Maybe try to obsess with a newer thing you don't understand?  Make the act more timely.  Or put down the computer and listen to some GNR cassette bootlegs.  Man, they rocked so hard.

Oh and fuck, that whole ten years ago thing?  It was actually 20.  I kind of will always think it is the year 2000 when estimating how long ago something was.  At least music doesn't confuse me into hating people, though.

[Toaster]

I bet Amish people are super fit.

[Ben-San]

Perhaps there were multiple hasidic rappers, yeah.

It seems like the kind of ironic wacky zip-tang zany hipster idea that more than one person would toss out there.

Yeah, them Jews never actually like to rap.

They're just all about playing their klezmer and showtunes, y'know, none of them would ever want to freestyle. Not those people.

Edit: More specifically what pisses me off is dominant-culture douchenozzles having no trouble at all assuming that members of their group, the dominant culture, can assimilate other subcultures fine and don't blink an eye at Eminem or the Beastie Boys* or any other apparently dominant-culture white rappers doing fine - that's just hip-hop entering the mainstream! But whoa-nellie, watch out if the "wrong" minority culture tries to appropriate from another minority - then it's just a hilarious novelty act. Latinos are allowed to perform hip-hop as long as half the band is black because, y'know, all them ghetto folks can stick together but Jews? Hell, them guys are practically crackers. But not quite, because we can see the distinctive markers so the conflation is high-larious as opposed to the dominant culture which of course has no distinctive markers because that's the baseline of "just people", right?

A dozen Brits sing a vaguely reggae-like song a white American (**) wrote for exotic flavour in the sixties and it's a "true classic of reggae". A Hasid embraces the symbolism and spirituality of Rastafari to interpret his Jewish beliefs and he's a comic-novelty act.

(*): The Beastie Boys are Jewish but are allowed to rap because they use stage names.
(**): Neil Diamond is also Jewish but he's allowed to write classics of reggae because his parents adopted an Anglo-sounding name.

Edit 2: I should probably get some sleep. But seriously, don't be a douchenozzle just because people aren't being your dominant culture. I mean, some of my best friends are douchenozzles, sure, but would you want your sister to marry one?

[wombat]

So people were surprised by a Hasidic rapper pretending to be more Hasidic that he really was? This is new? Like we've never seen a performer who wasn't as country or as poor or as whatever when growing up as s/he sang about? Like there isn't a reason it's called 'performance'?

[AugustWest]

My cat's breath smells like cat food.

[littlefallsmets]

Ain't about the guy being Jewish, Ben, that bugs me insofar as the hipster posturing thing.

It's about the guy being of a particular subculture that's insanely cloistered unto itself... or the exaggerated idea of that then being sold as the reason you're supposed to like the performed material as opposed to the performed material itself. That's why the next logical comparison was the Amish.

Identity As Schtick drives me crazy. Some dude who happens to be Jewish or Islamic or Scientologist or Presbeterian or whatever rapping is not the point of what bothers me. Some dude saying "I was completely outside of the culture and now it is wacky and ca-razy that I am doing the thing that is popular in the mainstream and, oh, by the way, even though I have been performing in bars for five years, I am still completely naive to you world and definitely treat me like a circus freak and pay me more money"... that's what bugs me.

It's like that old SNL sketch "Unfrozen Caveman Lawyer" you know?

Yeah, dude was a caveman who got unfrozen but... in the intervening fifteen years, he got a law degree, got married, had some kids and clearly mastered all the subtleties of the modern world... but whenever it suits him to win a case or to get his cappuchino returned because there wasn't enough foam, he'll start talking about how he doesn't UNDERSTAND our modern world and he doesn't UNDERSTAND how the little men put on shows in the television box and...

It's bullshit. He's playing off people's stereotypes and ignorance to maintain a convenient pose that allows him to not actually have to try.

And bleh. Bleh and feh to that. Has nothing to do with what slightly different invisible bearded man your parents told you will have you tormented by monsters after you die if you touch your pee-pee and everything to do with how intellectually insulting the Fake Outsider - Unfrozen Caveman Lawyer schtick is.

I like the hell out of some Beastie Boys stuff. And Eminem's less misogynistic stuff is usually at least funny. And Neil Diamond performs in a genre of pop music that does not interest me no matter how well or poorly performed.

EDIT: to wombat's point, it was fine when Bronson Pinchot stole Andy Kaufman's schtick, watered it down for people on tractors and called it "Balki"... that's okay, that's how television works. But if he spent the rest of his life wandering around claiming to actually BE from an obscure Greek island and furthermore fifteen years later pretending to still be shocked that MacDonalds didn't sell sheep burgers, man, that crap would be annoying.

This is also why Yakov Smirnov needed to be hung from the neck until dead. I mean, the original premise of his comedy what lame enough but whatever, there's lots of lame standups out there. Ten years later, when he's living in a nice condo in a good part of town and is pissed to wait five minutes in line for coffee instead of three hours for a beet, man, that's when the dude absolutely needs new material.

See also Larry The Cable Guy never breaking character. Bullshit.