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@achewood Terrible dream where Bobby Flay came to my childhood home, danced on the table, recited verse, and we had nothing interesting for him to do.

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Author Topic: Halp.  (Read 8724 times)

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linnea

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Re: Halp.
« Reply #15 on: January 12, 2010, 05:57:21 am »
I am weighing in a little late, but shit dude. You need this chick like you need a hot shovel. No, you are not obligated to remain friends. I'd cut her out of your life and keep moving. Onwards and upwards.
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Doc

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Re: Halp.
« Reply #16 on: January 12, 2010, 07:39:21 am »
If you like chatting to her do, if you don't, don't. I have exes that go both ways and they're different circumstances.

I'm generally of the opinion that you don't actually want to know why someone decided they don't like you anymore, at best they lie to be nice to you and you don't actually learn anything or they tell you the truth and well, do you really want to hear the true answer to the question 'why do you find me repellent?'
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lprkn

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Re: Halp.
« Reply #17 on: January 12, 2010, 07:52:25 am »
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AugustWest

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Re: Halp.
« Reply #18 on: January 12, 2010, 01:47:44 pm »
Quote from: linnea on January 12, 2010, 05:57:21 am
You need this chick like you need a hot shovel.

Hey, I could really have used a hot shovel the other day when I was cleaning the snow off my front steps...
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Bobby Isosceles

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Re: Halp.
« Reply #19 on: January 12, 2010, 02:28:58 pm »
Not only are you ALLOWED to say no, you are REQUIRED to. Tell her to piss off and enjoy the ski instructor.
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Carlos del Vaca

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Re: Halp.
« Reply #20 on: January 12, 2010, 03:20:57 pm »
Concur with Bobby and Ash.  Fuck "friends."  You've got friends.
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jay-ell

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Re: Halp.
« Reply #21 on: January 12, 2010, 03:45:01 pm »
I can see wanting to know why it ended - learning from past mistakes, etc - but in this case it seems like there's nothing you're going to learn from this conversation that is going to keep you from blaming yourself.

Move on, realize that it's her loss, and understand that there was nothing you did or failed to do that would have made a damn bit of difference.
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side_show

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Re: Halp.
« Reply #22 on: January 12, 2010, 04:22:49 pm »
I remained pretty good friends with two exes, but in both cases, things got uncomfortable once I moved on to the next serious relationship, and the friendships fizzled out.  It became a really weird feeling hanging out with an ex, allowing him to fill emotional needs, once I had an actual partner to fill those needs along with all the other benefits. 

I don't think it would be wrong to ask for some sort of explanation or insight if you think it would be a constructive thing that might help you grow.  It's well within her right to not discuss it if she doesn't want to, but I don't see the harm in asking.
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miles

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Re: Halp.
« Reply #23 on: January 12, 2010, 04:50:56 pm »
Quote from: side_show on January 12, 2010, 04:22:49 pm
I don't think it would be wrong to ask for some sort of explanation or insight if you think it would be a constructive thing that might help you grow.  It's well within her right to not discuss it if she doesn't want to, but I don't see the harm in asking.

This.

I think all that a person owes another is honesty, but not full disclosure. Also, it may not be so constructive, especially if you are more or less aware of your shortcomings anyway. I've been dumped with and without explanation, and in the long run it's mostly the same. It sucks for a while, and then you get over it.
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smick

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Re: Halp.
« Reply #24 on: January 12, 2010, 05:51:25 pm »
Go find something closer to home that will allow you to "interfere with it... sexually".
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Mr Trout

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Re: Halp.
« Reply #25 on: January 12, 2010, 06:21:40 pm »
Quote from: carlosdelvaca on January 12, 2010, 03:20:57 pm
Fuck friends.

I think you've hit upon the only logical reason to stay "friends"
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jaydub

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Re: Halp.
« Reply #26 on: January 12, 2010, 07:14:22 pm »
I was going to go there, but Mr Trout said it first. 
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smick

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Re: Halp.
« Reply #27 on: January 13, 2010, 12:53:14 am »
Man... I don't need a fuck friend in England.

If I need a passport to have sex with someone, I'm not doing it right.
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Drygioni

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Re: Halp.
« Reply #28 on: January 13, 2010, 04:02:40 am »
Quote from: smick on January 13, 2010, 12:53:14 am
Man... I don't need a fuck friend in England.

If I need a passport to have sex with someone, I'm not doing it right.

Youu sur ab9out that handsome?
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smick

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Re: Halp.
« Reply #29 on: January 13, 2010, 06:47:03 pm »
I thought I was... but now I'm not so sure.

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